What better way to celebrate your favorite President-elect than by taking a leering purple gnome-head and rubbing it joyously over your nethers? Buy sixteen million for your family and friends, for the holidays, and they will never ask you for a holiday gift again. [Etsy via Washington Post]
Hola wonkerados.
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{ 52 comments }
Hope on a Rope.
(It’s too easy)
Let me be the 47th person to say, “Hope On A Rope”.
But it’s so damn ugly. I wouldn’t even use that shrunken head to ward off evil spirits.
Hope on a Rope for everyone on my list!
Besides, if I’m going to buy something with an Obama head on it, I’d spring for that Obama dildo. Makes a lovely gift for grandma.
To Mr Gnome Head:
Some wise man, maybe it was black Jesus or the last son of Krypton, once handed me a tablet
from a mountaintop. Inscribed were three bits of very special, rarely given advice that will
make one’s life more full:
1. Look out for other people, even when it doesn’t directly benefit you
2. Strive to make a difference everywhere you go
3. Get back up every time you are knocked down.
[re=179587]NoWireHangers[/re]: [re=179588]FreshCliches[/re]: [re=179591]widestanceromancer[/re]:
Ha.
Ha.
Ha.
My nethers shrank into my body cavity when I saw that.
I’m not buying it unless it’s brown and white chocolate scented.
[re=179587]NoWireHangers[/re]: And my computer is way too slow.
[re=179587]NoWireHangers[/re]:
[re=179591]widestanceromancer[/re]:
Two more, and we’ve got Yahtzee.
[re=179593]choinski[/re]: Whoa there. That’s what Hopey wrote to my nephew! You mean, Hopey and Black Jesus from Krypton are the same?
Doesn’t look much like Barry. However, two, used over time, would certainly approach the shape of a pair of purple TruckNutz.
It’ll scrub the bitter right out of anyone.
[re=179600]FreshCliches[/re]: Mmmm… let the fascism begin!
“Hope on a rope!”
[re=179604]TGY[/re]: It’ll look like him when he’s 68, bald, and hasn’t eaten in three months. And if his teeth grow. And he turns purple. It’s a striking resemblance, actually.
Obama soap for that articulate, bright, and clean feeling!
Alright fine, someone makes soap that looks like Obama. I can accept that, but why must it be purple?
When is the WALNUTS!-scented McCain head soap coming out?
Hope on a rope, is this from the same company that brought us pope on a rope?
Don’t drop the hope? Wasn’t that a phrase Jesse Jackson used in his 1988 campaign?
[re=179611]dano[/re]: red and blu, duh, foo
[re=179608]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
More like some old, white hick who’s 68 and bald, hasn’t eaten in three months, who froze to death outside and then was decapitated. Masterful craftmanship.
Looks more like Prince Charles to me. Dope on a Rope
Looks more like Prince Charles to me. Dope on a rope?
Yeah but does it smell like hope or does it smell like sandalwood, teaberry, or Christmas cookie, which aren’t hopeful scents? I’d also like to commend them for skirting thiiiiiiiiiiis close to the bad side of “Sambo soap” without going over. It’s still pretty gruesome though, should have made it pumpkin scented and used it to scare children on Halloween.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
[re=179612]JohnnyMeatworth[/re]: Never. It smelled too bitter.
I think the worst part of this is that this hideous thing is resting on a bed of roses for some reason.
Also! Why would I want a novelty item depicting an aged member of the “Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids” gang? I think that’s Old Weird Harold.
Obama is in the Blue Man Group?
I say we send it to Sarah Palin…
Will these same folks do a Sarah Palin on a rope, too? That would do my nethers-hygene program a world of good.
Oh wow. There really is George Bush Dope on a Rope soap. Want.
Is this some kind of perverted way that Hillz is using to pay off her campaign debts?
I’m pretty sure there’s been no one in the history of (wo)mankind that paid, what $11m to become a secretary. If you help reduce those debts, then she won’t be a history maker in those regards anymore.
If you can’t move sandalwood, you don’t belong in this league!
[re=179616]monty[/re]: Nope. ….dope.
[re=179636]Borat[/re]: Hm. I doubt it, else where’s the inflatable Chels doll?
[re=179633]WadISay[/re]: Dope on a rope.
Hey. Someone had to say it.
And apparently, several somebodies already did. Man, I’m slow.
Actually, it reminds me of the guys from Cho Aniki. Quite possibly the gayest videogame series of all time.
Pope+Dope=Hope
The genius management team at ACME Soap-an-a-rope came up with a wonderful cost savings idea.
Take all the leftover John Paul II soaps in the Secaucus, New Jersey warehouse (top half of head) and fuse them together with all the leftover Jimmy Carter soaps in the Ft Lauderdale warehouse (bottom half of head).
Et Viola!
Fresh, clean, nice-looking, and who knows, maybe even articulate soap for the masses!
I was thinking of this image in particular.
Is Hopey Shpongled? http://fusionanomaly.net/areyoushpongled.jpg
Meh — until they make it into a butt-plug, not interested…
Simon Posford FTW!
[re=179621]misterarthur[/re]: Definitely Prince Charley. Must have had an overrun and decided to do some creative marketing.
They have one for the governator – grope on a rope
That’s one pointy chin! Does it come with a waterproof vibrating bullet insert?
That’s all well and good, but Obama is not the President I want to force to kiss my ass every day.
I have a Cheney one made from rendered fetuses, scented with fetid wombats.
Letterman way-back-when: “Ladies and gentlemen, this is a show you don’t want.”
(peers carefully forward at the que card)
” – to miss! A show you don’t want to miss.”
Also, on another distant occasion: “Tonight’s show is really g- … hmmm. I don’t wanna lie to them, Paul. Ladies and gentlemen … for your purposes … tonight’s show is- pretty good.”
Okay, youse guys. First off, he’s purple because he’s uniting the red and the blue (= purple). He smells not like sandalwood, but like a breath of fresh air. Duh! But, I’m happy to take custom requests for scents and colors, as long as I run it past the Dugshop board of grand fromages, and of course for an additional fee.
We do indeed have a Dubya Dope on a Rope, and a McCain Old Man McSame. We even have a Hillary or two still kicking around. Sarah Palin doesn’t get a big soap, but we did have a little pitbull with lipstick that we sold for a bit, although we gave every penny of profit to a woman’s shelter in tribute to Joe Biden, who didn’t have a soap at all.
Sorry some of you don’t like the sculpture, we’re very attached to our sculptor and think he did a fab job. Perhaps it’s just my poor photography. I don’t understand the problem with the roses, though.
Anyway, thanks, Wonkette, for the backhanded mention. For the record, our soap is of the highest quality, and smells great, so chances are your gift-ees WILL be happy with their present, damn it.
It would sell better if it didn’t look like Barney Fife. Do you want to make $$ or not people?
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