PRETEND BOYFRIENDS  12:09 pm November 14, 2008

National Hero Nate Silver Writing Lots Of Books For Lots Of $$$

by Jim Newell

Ha ha, that is not D.L. Hughley at all.Oh Nate Silver, how we long for your embrace! Spin us a tale of numbers and regressions, just like in the old days? Like that time you Internet-fought the Real Clear Politics guy when he wasn’t accurately weighing reputable polls… yes… just yes. Whoa what’s this, you’re writing a book. Two books! WANT. NOW. Please include sexy nude numbers pix. The numbers 5 and 8, 69ing. We don’t read for the words. [NY Observer]

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Hola wonkerados.

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jinmoom November 14, 2008 at 12:11 pm

Put your pants back on, Jim.

cal November 14, 2008 at 12:12 pm


Anonymous Office Zombie November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm

Unfortunately, the books will be in the form of binary code feeds.

dougbob November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm

i wuz wondering…do ya think mr. silver can predict my boss’s next emotional breakdown? i’d like to take that day off, please.

Gopherit November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm

Who cares about bookdeals? Nate is getting more tail than a New York Bus Bench. He is every stat-nerd’s hero, now.

sanantonerose November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm

shortsshortsshorts, slap him, send him to school, ’cause I can’t take no more of this.

NoWireHangers November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm

Jim and Nate sittin’ in a tree

FreshCliches November 14, 2008 at 12:15 pm

I gotta admit, that D.L. Hughley is doing some wack impersonations.

It’s like he’s the thinking man’s Dave Chappelle…”I’m Nate Silver, bitch!”

bitchincamaro November 14, 2008 at 12:20 pm

I predicted this.

Anonymous Office Zombie November 14, 2008 at 12:21 pm

Do you imagine that Nate was the greatest mathlete ever when he was in high school? Like the Michael Jordan of mathletes?

Deepthroat November 14, 2008 at 12:23 pm

Newellie, you’re doin’ a heck-of-a job today! Heh heh heh!

ManchuCandidate November 14, 2008 at 12:24 pm

I was wondering what the hell is Jermaine from Flight of The Concords is doing on Wonkette.

Good for Nate. There’s some hope for us maths and skienze guys to get some (assuming we can clean up a bit (okay, a lot) and go visit a fashion consultant.)

Kinbote November 14, 2008 at 12:25 pm

Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future. You are interested in the unknown… the mysterious. The unexplainable. That is why you are here.

Miller November 14, 2008 at 12:28 pm

Did you see his post on the difficulty the Georgia runoff would have on pollsters? Shorts changing time. The struggle he goes through, the sweat and the toil of getting the numbers is what makes him so damn sexy. I bet he’ll get the numbers right anyway, he’s just that damn good.

shortsshortsshorts November 14, 2008 at 12:28 pm

[re=176960]sanantonerose[/re]: There appears to be a disturbance among us. MUTINY IT SEEMS?
The Bush years were better for this. It is so much easier to just expatriate someone and send their ass to Gitmo. What are we to do now? Do not fret, Texas rose.

bfstevie November 14, 2008 at 12:28 pm

I had requested a Nate Silver action figure. My suggestion was ignored, just like all the ones I send to the editors at Wonkette.

nurple November 14, 2008 at 12:29 pm

Foto is not Nate Silver. This is actually Jerry’s cousin who works for the Parks Department.

Not_So_Much November 14, 2008 at 12:36 pm

I saw him on Maddow last week. The man is a genius, but I’m surprised he was able to escape from being hung on his locker by his underwear to get out and make the talk show circuit. Should NOT interact directly with hu-mans.

WIDTAP November 14, 2008 at 12:36 pm

Nate is just selling out to the man. Oh for the day when math was free of the influence of the almighty dollar and poor but happy statisticians filled the tubes.

queeraselvis v 2.0 November 14, 2008 at 12:38 pm

Mmmm. Slicked-back hair + glasses + mastery of SPSS = creamy jeans.

bfstevie November 14, 2008 at 12:39 pm

[re=176992]nurple[/re]: That would be Uncle Leo’s son, cousin Jeffrey.

AngryBlakGuy November 14, 2008 at 12:39 pm

…ummmmmm, a math textbook?

mr.november November 14, 2008 at 12:41 pm

The probability that the statistician will be acquiring some stats is almost certain.

AngryBlakGuy November 14, 2008 at 12:42 pm

…what a perfect example of a guy I use to beat up and take their lunch money in highschool(and now signs my paychecks)!

StripesAndPlaids November 14, 2008 at 12:43 pm

Geez, Newell. Get a room for all that regression analysis.

Lascauxcaveman November 14, 2008 at 12:46 pm

That Coat+Shirt+Tie combo is proof that our fab pal Nate is not teh ghey.

Tommy Says Soooo November 14, 2008 at 12:47 pm

I still don’t think anything tops McLovin faking his driver’s license.

Rodney Badger November 14, 2008 at 12:48 pm

I have no doubt that Nate is getting laid because of his math-induced celebrity. But I don’t understand the mechanics of it. I mean, where does one go to find math groupies? If you are an athlete or rapper, you go to the club or something. And are mathletes immune to swagger jacking?

Chuck Fildren November 14, 2008 at 12:51 pm

Now that he’s the best mathematician/statistician/savior of the world/person ever he should change his name from Nate Silver to Nate Gold.

Chuck Fildren November 14, 2008 at 12:52 pm

[re=177023]Rodney Badger[/re]: I think we need to form math bars for just this purpose. The world needs a place to pick up math sluts.

Dreadful Gate November 14, 2008 at 12:53 pm

I’m a pollster in real life, and Nate has brought respect, kudos and poontang to our entire profession. We salute you, SilverMan!

tank this November 14, 2008 at 12:53 pm

you know, I went to nerd-school with nate (we maybe had a class together) and I gotta say he’s way more socially adept than most of us.

sanantonerose November 14, 2008 at 12:53 pm

[re=176988]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I was just quoting the only decent line from RocknRolla. But now you have me scared of the mutiny. Hug me!

FreshCliches November 14, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=177034]Chuck Fildren[/re]: The axes of dweeb bull, as it were.

CorkPopper November 14, 2008 at 1:04 pm

I have a friend who is a super smart math nerd, currently working for Google, and he opines that many of his colleagues have undiagnosed Asperger’s. Given Nate’s parents’ anecdote about him being a self-declared “numbers machine” counting into the thousands in preschool, I’d say probability is oh, about 97.3% that Nate is of similar ilk. Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

Meaux November 14, 2008 at 1:07 pm

Nice job on the alt text, Newell. You can do it!

queeraselvis v 2.0 November 14, 2008 at 1:16 pm

[re=177055]FreshCliches[/re]: Dweeb bulls wobble, but they don’t fall down.

PerhapsSo November 14, 2008 at 1:57 pm

Sean Quinn doesn’t get nearly this much media play.

TommySez November 14, 2008 at 2:26 pm

I’m glad he’s writing books, because his TV presence sure sucks.

Here’s a hint. When someone thanks you for being on their show, the correct response is not “yeah.” (He did this twice to Rachel Maddow, in the same segment.)

lotusflwr November 14, 2008 at 2:35 pm

I wish to engage in a fourway with my husband, Nate Silver and the XKCD guy using XKCD guy’s mathematical kama sutra:

Take the 4th root of THIS ASS baby!

blackdontcrack November 14, 2008 at 2:52 pm

he is SO not cute. what is the deal here? do political nerds really not have anyone better to lust over?

xavan November 14, 2008 at 3:45 pm

The guy may have taught numbers how to fuck (as ontd_political will have me believe), but he is still an unrepentant nerd. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t hit it, just means I’d be slightly ashamed about it afterwards.

MrsNateSilver November 15, 2008 at 1:18 pm

blackdontcrack: You don’t get it! It’s a FETISH. Like skinny, short white men who dig giant women of color, or people who have a thing for midgets. WE LOVES US SOME NERD ACTION.

Rodney Badger: I met him on the casual encounters of Chicago Craigslist actually. If you take a look at his hands in this photo, you can tell why I am so madly in love.

(My I have a fantastic imagination…Though I’m starting to creep myself out here…Eh, whatev.)

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