Dudes… she is a gem. Sarah Palin. She gave a press conference yesterday — her first national press conference, ever — as part of the Republican Governors’ Association conference in the latest move for her nascent 2012 campaign.
Her astounding opening speech lasts for more than half of the press conference, and it’s classic Palin: the nouns are there (“governors,” “work,” “2012,” etc.), but everything in between is a hellish, primordial shitheap of misplaced modifiers, abrupt switchings of tense, and sounds that simply are not words.
There are so many gerunds in places that do not need gerunds. She is insulting you with gerunds. She uses a gerund to start every “sentence” (more like, word-sequence). That is her way of telling you to fuck off and die.
The first reporter’s question, naturally, is, Why are you only talking to the media now? Palin answers that it’s because the campaign is over. We do not think she meant it that way, but who can even tell.