Michelle Obama Wears Expensive Jewelry, Just Like Republicans!

  shiny things

Look at her fancy plutocrat baublesMichelle Obama is worse than Cindy McCain times Sarah Palin divided by Imelda Marcos times one million. Her election-night earrings cost a reported $11,000 — approximately twice what a healthy human kidney will fetch on the black market! This is a relevant metric because next year we will all be selling our kidneys to make rent, until we burn down our rental dwellings for firewood. Meanwhile, the Obamas will be sitting in the White House feasting on precious gems and fillets of endangered species. [New York Magazine/British Vogue]

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Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith

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65 comments

  1. shortsshortsshorts

    Just wait ’til ya’all hear how much the Obama’s spent on terrorist cells and yellow-cake uranium.
    Still not as much as Palin’s wardrobe, BUT CONSIDER.

  2. grendel

    $11K jewelry? That’s what Cindy’s stage jewelry costs that she lets the maids keep for “not finding” her stash.

  3. TGY

    Could be worse: ‘nose piercings’. Nobody likes a nose-ring bedecked with emeralds because, you know…boogers.

  4. tinybubbles

    After supporting Hopey for the past who knows how many months, campaigning for him, taking care of the girls, traveling all over, Michelle has earned those earrings. I wonder if this is going to cause a bitterz uproar?

  5. GagHotDew

    This is just so true. I knew it would happen. Wearing earrings. Smiling. I warned my next-door neighbors about this but they went ahead an voted for this Hussein fellow. Go ahead, I said, you’ll see. Earrings, and shiny ones at that. Smiley, smiley-o. I threw up on my flag-themed pinafore just thinking about it. PS – don’t tell anyone but I got way more than 11 dollars for _my_ kidney.

  6. problemwithcaring

    [re=174664]tinybubbles[/re]: For a little while – at least until the inaugural ball tickets on eBay start going for about three times that.

  7. 2druk2phluq

    It’s obvious that they can be stretched into a rather deadly garrote. Michelle would have learned several of the ways a garrote can kill during her training at Islamofascist Assassin School™ (It’s not just for Islamofascists anymore! Call 1-800-DIE-YTEE).

    I’m going to hell. It’s so clear now.

  8. AngryBlakGuy

    …hey Sara K., you don’t happen to know how much a gently used Liver would go for do you? Mine is a few hundred thousand miles past the warranty.

  9. robanybody

    I think we should be clear: when our side wears expensive jewelry, it’s giving hope to the masses at a time of deep economic concern or, if you wish, it’s a tasteful display of success hard-earned through real work, dedication, and brilliance, which affirms the American story. When their side does it, it’s over-the-top decadence, period. I see no contradiction or irony there at all, and neither should you.

  10. Tommy Says Soooo

    Earrings, schmearings. Michelle can pull off Wolford hose/bodystockings. Um, excuse me, gotta go.

  11. Miller

    Who does she think she is, 1/10th of Cindy McCain? Real first lady wanna-bees slap down real money for some half a mil blood diamonds, not these $11,000 poverty baubles. I bet no one in Sierra Leone got an arm hacked off so she could get some ear sparkles. For shame.

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

  12. Schadenfried

    [re=174681]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: At least you didn’t use Reh Dogg’s pic, he wasn’t in the tank for the Hopester.

  13. AngryBlakGuy

    …so what, Michelle has a couple of house payments dangling from ears; Sarah Failin spent the entire GDP of Zimbabwe on her wardrobe.

  14. NoWireHangers

    Well, duh. Now that the Obamas are in the White House we WANT Michelle to spend millions of dollars to look fabulous. That’s why we voted for them.

    Besides, I’m sure the expensive earrings are like fancy Oscar duds: the designer phoned her up and wanted her to wear them. I’m sure they were free. Even if she paid, it was with her own money, and cot damn she just became First Lady. Gotta celebrate, bitches!

  15. Ms. Single Mama

    They were probably donated by some designer. And besides 11K is nothing… could have been much worse.

  16. PoliTacky

    [re=174723]NoWireHangers[/re]: The designers often loan that shit out for the free publicity, sometimes they even come with a bodyguard… only Sharon Stone thinks that they’re “gifts” and refuses to give them back!

  17. HeyHey

    Do we know that she purchased them? I think they may have been lent, like designers do for Hollywood stars.

    There’s a big difference between Cindy wearing blinding diamond earrings that she purchased for herself and Michelle borrowing hip diamond ear-bobbs for a single night.

  18. sati demise

    [re=174730]Ms. Single Mama[/re]: Retail or wholesale?

    Enjoy the bold choices of Michelle now, because she might be constricted to ‘business classic’ jewelry when she lives in the White House..or NOT!

    There will be a mad spending spree in Washington DC during this ‘transition’, out with the old, in with all sorts of new and exciting people. Christmas in January! So dont expect any great after Christmas sales in DC this year…..retail is going to cash in some chips in the one geographical area of the country where people are getting new jobs…

  19. AngryBlakGuy

    [re=174715]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: …and Cindy McCain probably financed an entire African civil war with all the blood diamonds she was wearing at the RNC!

  20. TexasCowGirl

    Sorry but I’m relatively new here so what are truck nutz exactly? I hate to be an ignorant slut, but I’m a bit confused.

    And Michelle earned those damn earrings. The more fabulous she looks the more the bitters scream and the more I laugh. So keep it up Mrs. O.

  21. Tommy Says Soooo

    [re=174760]TexasCowGirl[/re]: There’s no need to be a hater. Ignorance is often a valued attribute in sluts.

  22. zetetic

    [re=174760]TexasCowGirl[/re]: TruckNutz are only the most awesome vehicle accessory since mirrored silhouette mudflap girls. Or whatever they’re called.

    Kinda surprised you don’t know about them. Are you sure you’re from Texas? Aren’t TruckNutz required there to make your truck street-legal? Like having a license plate and a gun rack?

  23. S.Luggo

    Meanwhile, shouldering a 9.7 million gazillion dollars in campaign debt, Hilary is forced to wear last season’s fugly pant suits and to use old Miracle Whip tubs for friggin’ soup bowls. Unfair. Very unfair. – Countess de Rothschild

    BTW: Michelle’s boojzee bling looks like dandified pipe cleaners. Just being objective.

  24. TexasCowGirl

    [re=174850]zetetic[/re]: I resent and reject your stereotyping of Texans! How the hell would I know anything about trucks? I ride a damn horse!

    Oh, and thank you for the info. I really appreciate you answering my question.

  25. ceci

    I agree with heyhey. Celebs do it all the time, I don’t see her spending that much on jewelry, she gives off a low maintenance vibe? Maybe she needs a stylist though…that election day dress was kind of ugly!

  26. sarcasticusername

    hey at least she saved her blinding jewels until after gustav destroyed the world, this way she’s just fabulous, rather than fabulous AND insensitive.

  27. Itsjustme

    [re=174850]zetetic[/re]: Truck nutz are more Florida/Georgia than Texas. All we had was a stupid fucking Governor to sacrifice to the Nation.

  28. Diahni

    I am underwhelmed at the report of MO’s earrings. If my husband made a bundle on an autobiography, he had damned well better buy me a nice pair of “real” jewelry. Since you’re comparing this to the excesses of the GOP girls, can you really compare her earrings to Yoda Palin’s wardrobe or, worse, Cindy McCain’s Star Wars get-up for the GOP convention. Think of something more interesting to write about.

Comments are closed.