Well now we have leverage with the Republican party to rebuild it in the likeness of Truck Nutz. The Paultards, meanwhile, have nothing. [Rebuild The Party]

Donate with CCDonate with CC


  1. Um . . . I’m actually a little concerned that we were able to beat the Paultards. Either they’re slipping or we’re, well, let’s not go there.

  2. You’ve made me proud, America. Now make sure someone stays up tonight casting votes to keep us in the lead. Not me, as I need to wander upstairs for some victory sex. Hopefully my wife’s interested, as I am getting tired of taking advantage of myself.

  3. we’re no 1! we’re no 1!
    so do Ken and Jim and Sara and Intern Juli all get together now to vote on who becomes next pope of the RNC? do they send up white smoke when someone has been elected?

  4. Give me Truck Nutz or give me death. Preferably, don’t give me death, just give me the Truck Nutz. Give them to me now. Lord Jesus, bless my Truck Nutz with cupped hands gently.

  5. [re=174007]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: Until today I, too, had no idea. They are not fuzzy dice. No, no, no. Just google trucknutz and let the tears flow.

  6. I logged off Wonkette
    To smoke a cigarette
    I’ve been trolling for tomorrow all my life
    I hit refresh this hour feeling bored and blue
    And now I’ve found my dreams have finally came true

    It’s a new day
    It’s a new day
    It’s a new day
    It’s a new day
    It’s a new day

  7. wow. I was away from my computer for 2 hours, and when I came back, we’d gotten our country back. {sniff}. NOW can we vote for my pro-pirates anti-ninja initiative?

  8. I admit that I’m partial to the “Carve backward B in face; teach themselves a lesson” option, but I voted Nuts to be a good sport. That’s called reaching across… no, reaching around the aisle.

  9. [re=174012]HybridzCantHandleTheNutz[/re]: My God, I had no idea those existed. Those people should be giving Wonkette a cut of the royalties for all the free publicity.

    Those are almost as sad as these douche bags who buy fake balls to put in a neutered dog’s empty nut sac to make him feel like he still has a pair.

  10. [re=174020]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I guess we could go with the notion that no publicity is bad publicity, but otherwise, I’m not so sure we advanced their popularity among Republicans today, and something tells me that most of their customers are Republicans. But something else tells me that the TRUCK NUTZ market doesn’t spend much time on the PaulTard blogs.

  11. [re=174020]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Neuticles!!! Interestingly, the only dog I personally know with a pair belongs to my lesbian pretend-girlfriend. She and her partner didn’t want him to take it personally when they had his nuts whacked off, so they opted for a set of neuticles (or crotch-clackers, as I prefer to call them).

  12. “I love the smell of TRUCKNUTZ! in the morning… it smells like… VICTORY.”

    When coupled with the smell of dead moose and used GOP-bought panties… then yes, yes it does.

  13. My favourite remark from the Comments on that site, from CoolRefreshingJesus:

    “My dad once told me a story about his days spent in a bamboo hut in a makeshift prison toward the end of the War. It was the 4th of July and his spirits were very low. He wanted to be back behind the wheel of his old ’61 Chevy, a beer in his hand, mom’s delicate face in his lap. He began to weep. Then a guard approached, knelt, and drew in the dirt outside my father’s cell a crude set of TruckNutz.”

    Take a bow, someone.

  14. I feel like I’ve taken part in something bigger than myself…NO….WORDS…*sniff*
    Oh wait, yes there are!

    When I last checked in we were at number 4. The GOP doesn’t understand that we can kill time on the intertubez far better than they can! HENGH!?

  15. wheelie: that is all kinds of awesome

    Honestly, until today, I didn’t even know what trucknutz were. And I’m in North Carolina! I’m so proud to be so sheltered in such a positive way.

  16. [re=174004]Beef Supreme[/re]: Well done.

    I think that if the GOP is planning on having Caribou run for pres in 2012 that they’d better outlaw sentence diagramming.

  17. You know, if Barry wasn’t so gosh-darn *educated* and all that, then truck nutz wouldn’t be an issue. Maybe he could mollify the bitters by hanging a pair from the newly-purchased Hope Mobile?

  18. [re=174005]psychedelicSludge[/re]: Free-Range Truck Nuts(tm)? Oh wait…That might be a bad idea. I think they already have a phrase for that: unsightly male nudism.

  19. Comments People! We are still lagging the Paultards in terms of comments. This should be easy since we don’t often complete sentences containing TruckNutz and proper capitalization is forbidden. I’m not interested in reading the Paultard comments, but I suspect they are multi-paragraph rants so we can easily catch up

  20. Do we have any reporters (with proper credentials) that can call the RNC and DEMAND to know what they make of the results of their poll?

    I’d like to see an article about the ‘findings’ of their vote

  21. “Do we have any reporters (with proper credentials) that can call the RNC and DEMAND to know what they make of the results of their poll?”

    I did actually call them for a comment, but I couldn’t make out the response. It sounded like, “Mmymph mouff ip pfull og truckk nutzzz.”

  22. [re=174007]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: If you want to find out what TruckNutz are, seach Google or Wonkette. Hell, half the avatars are TruckNutz on Wonkette.

    I think in your search you’ll find some BIG $ALE$ on TruckNutz!!!11!!!
    USA USA USA !!!11! NEVUR FORGET!!!1!!!

  23. You’re not telling the whole story. Options “Be more Gay” and “Scratch a backwards B into own face” are also polling higher than boring things like “Dump the religious right.”

    But I’m never one to resist being part of the mob, I’m voting Nutz!

  24. my personal favorite:



  25. [re=174010]Squiggyfm[/re]: It’s because they’ve hired Lani Guinier, of course. You all realize we’re going to get e mails begging us all for money from the new RNC chairman, Trig Palin, from now until the Rethugs win another presidential election in 812,718 AD.

  26. My 3 votes and completely mispelled, bitter comments in support of truck nutz are in. I didn’t think Wonkette could pull of the irreverent satire after the big O last Tuesday night, but you all have made me a believer. Yes we can (love truck nutz).

  27. I have been following the Help the Repubs posts and comments via my blackberry all day. Finally got to see the actual site!

    It is so un-fucking believable that they would POST the suggestions that they are getting…. I love it, it has mad me laugh almost as much as the whole “S&M Butt-Gut w/Oompa-Loompas” image and comments. (I was sitting at a sushi bar, in tears from laughter following the comments).

    These guys just don’t get this whole intertubes and web 2.0 and reaching out.

  28. As I wrote there:

    Truck Nutz is with us today. Nutz where are you? Where is Nutz? Is Nutz here with us today? Nutz, I thought you were here today.

    Well, you’re all Truck Nutz today, so all of you stand up!

  29. Doesn’t this also mean that NO ONE HAS CHECKED this “feedback” site since it was launched? Not only do not know how teh tubez work (though, they are aware of them, clearly), but they just don’t give a damn. TruckNutz indeed…

  30. Not for nothng, but there are alot of threads on the first page of that site that have not yet been ruined and overrun by trucknutz. The Ron Paul thread is pretty well overrun, but how about those others? I’ve been dropping trucknutz in all of them, like dainty little rabbit pellets….

  31. [re=174098]justshocking[/re]: while I’m solidly for our beloved Truck Nutz, there are so many, many thoughtful suggestions to be made; so many things to be considered. For example:
    The only way to save the party is to HIRE MORE NINJAS!!!

    I do think the robot menace is being overlooked, but that is a small price to pay.

  32. I’ve moved on in the world. In the race between Truck Nutz and Doctor Congressman Ron Paul (R-Blimp) I’ve decided to endorse NutsForTrucks, a competitor that appears with a lower Google listing for the term “TRUCK NUTZ” than the monopolistic Official Truck Nutz(tm). These rival NutsForTrucks boast more realistic scrotal veins, so that the granny behind my shiny black F-150 can know that my automobile has REAL MANLY GENITALS. I know, it’s a fringe choice, but I just can’t vote TruckNutz when there’s a viable third party candidate.

  33. [re=174062]Borat[/re]: Actually, your very post is the first hit for a Google search on “big $ale on truck nuts”. I had no idea Google archived sites so quickly. With Ted Stevens in court those tubes sure are running smoothly.

  34. I am still dying here as I read through the “TRUCKNUTZ!” and the “be more gay” entries. This one from the “be more gay” section is classic:



    Anyone here going to claim responsibility? Whoever wrote this rocks.

  35. [re=174103]Barrett808[/re]: Well, as demonstrated, at least WE can organize a movement. More than we can obviously say for the repugnantcans, no?

  36. Wow, the site is slow as hell, but I finally got my vote for Truck Nutz in.

    “When we read in the press that Obama asked Bush for emergency aid to the auto industry, we all know what he was talking about.


    The libtards are already trying to make this their issue. Wake up!. It’s the Truck Nutz, stupid!”

  37. I felt sorry for them for like a second and then I voted for Trucknutz and did my best to stress what a great idea Palin in 2012 is. Glad I could help em out ;)

  38. [re=174139]Rangeley[/re]: How dare you disparage The Ultimate Truck Accessory™?! Why do you hate the Free Market of Ideas and TruckNutz, Rangeley‽‽‽

  39. [re=174139]Rangeley[/re]: Fuck you, you TRUCK NUTZ hating bigot. I, for one, will forever proudly cling to my truck nutz, gun nutz and jesus nutz.

  40. [re=174143]CuntryFirst[/re]: Very humorous, but I am not attempting to get the government to restrict what you say.

    Do you think that its mature to spam a site, and post a series of intolerant personal attacks? Do you think that it’s the “progressive” thing to do? I simply fail to see under what sense this can be seen as a good idea, except for some childish mindset where you don’t even care how hateful you act towards others.

  41. [re=174146]Neon Trotsky[/re]: Rangeley is clearly an MK ULTRA uncercover CIA operative posing as a Paultard to infiltrate the Movement for Freedom and discourage us from spreading the Message of TruckNutz

  42. There’s really only two resisters on the comments board. There’s Rangeley, who’s so irritated he made an account here to call us childish, and there’s Tomb, who spams about how these comments are a spam “virus” perpetrated by Daily Kos.

  43. My favorite entry:


    All votes on this subject is a spam Virus. Comments provided are from Daily Kos bloggers who have nothing better to do with their lives.

  44. [re=174153]mattbolt[/re]: Au contraire, I do not think people here are childish. Rather, to spam a site with hateful, intolerant personal attacks is a childish behavior which I think is highly unbecoming of everyone involved in it.

  45. While I did my civic duty by voting up Truck Nutz, I was probably more productive by voting for Palin/Jindal on the witch doctor/exorcist platform. (sorry if this turns out to be a partial double-post; something magical happened on my computer while I was poking up the first version of this comment. See, we really need the witch doctors and exorcists to keep the intertubez working now that we may lose Ted)

  46. [re=174155]Rangeley[/re]: I get what you’re saying. The thing is, we’re just so used to being awful, mean-spirited sarcastic people here, that everyone knows that it’s snark and satire when we say horrible things. When we export it, and people don’t know the source, I guess it can look pretty bad when strangers are going “COLORED MUSLIN NOBAMA IMPREGNATED SARAH PALIN’S RETARDED BABY WITH TERRORIST SPERM DONOR BILL AYERS, THE BABY WAS DELIVERED BY DR. RON PAUL OBGYN AND THE TRUE FATHER WAS FOUND TO BE TRUCKNUTZ” and the context is removed.

  47. Oh man this just gets better eh?

    Dumbasses don’t have the capacity to kill some of these threads? Even the McStain losers with their shit facebook app shut it down after us killing it for two hours, and TRUCKNUTZZ is almost 12 hrs old now.

    me = Neiman Marxist


  48. [re=174148]Rangeley[/re]: You seem like a decent person, but so many of us feel that the GOP was SOO disrespectful during the election… the only real response is pure mockery. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to lube my anus so I can crap all over that website in an easier fashion.

  49. [re=174119]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: Yes, that was me. Up until now I’ve been a lurker, but today googled trucknutz and could not resist. You people crack me up.

  50. Why hasn’t someone edited the wikipedia entry for TRUCKNUTZ yet to cite the importance of WONKTARDS to this growing and important revolution within the Republican party?

  51. [re=174160]natoslug[/re]: Non, mais je parle francais un petit.
    [re=174161]mattbolt[/re]: In a way, it could be viewed as the difference between a group of friends in private making jokes, and one that goes out in public. The problem in this case is, obviously, that the little group of friends who finds it humorous to make jokes about downs syndrome and call people “paultards” is purposely going out there and spreading it around – to the people that will find it offensive. I think that might be considered the time that an “in-joke” steps into intended harassment of others.
    [re=174165]facehead[/re]: Oh believe me, I found the GOP incredibly disrespectful too. While you are probably saying that as an outsider looking in, I say it from my own personal experience within the party, dealing with the sorts of corrupt officials that are running it. I don’t mind a little bit of mockery aimed their way, but I think a line is crossed into counter-productivity when you bring children, or offensive slurs aimed at opponents.

  52. this is why i love wonkette! but i see the gop are giving credit to daily kos, but that just means we can strike at their dumb ‘help republican’s win’ sites on another day!

  53. [re=174148]Rangeley[/re]: *rolls eyes*

    I thought intolerant personal attacks were what “real” America was all about.

    ‘Scuse me while I go swill elitist lattes with my terrorist pals.

  54. *Not to mention, the “paultards” being derided so heavily (and constantly) represent many of the Republicans within the party who were fighting the hateful bigotry aimed at Obama, in addition to seeking to end the party’s opposition to issues like same-sex marriage. Among other things.

  55. I’m a tad bitter they’re now crediting Daily Kos with this. DAILY FUCKING KOS? Do they honestly think those sad sacks are nearly as SICK as you’d have to be on pour so much time, energy, and creativity to spamming a stupid GOP feedback forum? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? DAILY FUCKING KOS? We’re the black sheep of the librul muslin blogosphere. Daily Kos would be raising money for real causes or something. We’re busy spamming TruckNutz. Silly Republicans. They really don’t have a clue. About anything. Paultard or Wingnut or Neocon, you all suck. Every last one.



    The Paultards were looking to the man who voted *against MLK day* to bridge the racial divide!!!

    But that’s now why we pick on em. We pick on em because it’s fucking AWESOMEZ!!!

    Now, Back to the Daily Show =]

  57. God, I’m busting a trucknut reading the posts over in GOPherland. So inspiring! Trucknutz is truly a movement, and it is magnificent. From the gut. Making it, of course, a bowel movement. I think we’ve totally befuddled the flatheads who really think they’ll squeeze wisdom from their hordes of dickish, believe-anything nutbags who make up that saggy scrotum of a party. Instead of good, sound GOP logic, what do they get? Why, TRUCKNUTZ! of course. Did they expect anything less?

  58. [re=174181]Rangeley[/re]: You’re wrong about my being wrong.

    Both McStain and Paulapalooza voted “Nay” about MLK.

    Paul also voted “Nay” against rekkanizin’ Rosa Parks with a congressional medal.

  59. God dammit, Rangelelelegy sounds like one my ex’s back in the late 90s. She never did the drugs but insisted in hanging around us pot smoking losers. Always trying to talk some sense into us when we were all contacting space entities with our third eyes. The only time she was useful is when…(wait for it)….I had my giant truck nutz in her mouth.
    Thank you!!! No one cares what you think Ranggelelleye!

  60. [re=174184]Volumptuous[/re]: Paul voting for the holiday was one of two notable times he voted for something not expressly authorized by the Constitution – the other being his support for NASA.

    He did not oppose the medal for Rosa Parks, but rather, he opposed the use of tax-dollars for the medal – as he did with the medal for Mother Theresa and Pope John Paul II. Instead, he proposed that all congressman put forward $100 of their own to pay for it and show their support. Noone else joined him in the effort, though.

  61. [re=174148]Rangeley[/re]: So why don’t you do the right thing and work WITH the Democrats to UNITE the coiuntry? According to your beloved website, you are apparently at war with Obama and the dems:

    “Winning the technology war with the Democrats must be the RNC’s number one priority in the next four years.”

    “The challenge is daunting, but if we adopt a strongly anti-Washington message and charge hard against Obama and the Democrats, we will energize our grassroots base.”

  62. [re=174191]messickc (ROLL TIDE!)[/re]: Well, I didn’t write the introduction to the site. I did, however, give my support to a couple proposals, such as ending the drug war, opposing the patriot act, and adopting a socially libertarian stance as opposed to a warm embrace of the religious right.

    I don’t have a problem working with democrats where there’s common ground on these issues, either. In fact, that is sort of one of my points about this whole spam deal – by blanketly insulting and attacking all Republicans as bigots/racists/retarded/whatever else, you are insulting a lot of people who actually, I suspect, share a lot of common ground with you and can be worked with.

  63. [re=174190]Rangeley[/re]: Christ on a crutch. Will you please stop this nonsense. If you think you will ultimately convince everyone here to jump on the paultard crazy-train to Randian hell, you are sadly mistaken, sir (madam?).

  64. [re=174192]Rangeley[/re]: Well, my apologies to ya. I actually agree with you on the first paragraph. Friends? Say yes otherwise I’ll smack you upside the head with my TRUCKNUTZ!

  65. A recent post from the TRUCKNUTZ! trenches:


    Wonkette is 10 times more unbalanced than FoxNews”

    I am laughing so hard…

  66. [re=174192]Rangeley[/re]: That site wasn’t serious for 2 reasons. 1) No one is caring that we are spamming it (no one is bothering to monitor/delete posts at the site). 2) It’s the GOP. They don’t care what you think. Karl Rove and Grover Norquist aren’t going to check it out for new ideas. Especially when Paul got no traction against weak opposition in the primary. You’re just taking it seriously when you shouldn’t. Your only hope is to vote for Harry Brownes and Bob Barrs for the rest of your life.

  67. [re=174200]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]:
    The line between the absurd and real have been blurred. I’m thinking that’s a joke,but then again it could be real which makes me sad and gives me diarreah feelins.

  68. I just spent too much time reading the sad pathetic hateful ideas the gop has to ‘remake’ itself….omfg….the only good answers came from wonkette trucknutzers,(love the ninjas!) none of the gop seem to have any idea of why obama won….like they totaly missed the part where he talked about making life better for EVERYONE, stopping the war, enviornmental issues, …you know all those liberal commie islamofacist socilist human-lovin’ideas, (magic unicorn stuff aside), i also didn’t see one comment about throwing karl rove under the bus (which would be NO.1 with me!) if they keep this shit up they are gonna be history!(but we will need a bunch of 3rd parties to replace them)

  69. [re=174177]Volumptuous[/re]: “The Paultards were looking to the man who voted *against MLK day* to bridge the racial divide!!!”

    Also, let us not forget Paul’s long association with Willis Carto, the “person” that started the Holocaust Denial Industry in the U.S. and other delightful folks.

  70. [re=174197]messickc (ROLL TIDE!)[/re]: Sure. These are important times, with important issues. The more people are able to work together on areas of common ground, the better. I think sites like have a chance, albeit small, to impact things for the better if used properly – and before all this spamming happened, I think it had been used right. Imagine how much better things would be if, rather than spend this time undermining those causes of common ground, people put it into constructive efforts? So I definitely think that is the way to go.

    Plus, I wouldn’t want to be hit by any trucknuts.
    [re=174202]CuntryFirst[/re]: I agree with you somewhat, the site was unlikely to have much impact before the spamming. You did a good job reducing the chance even further, but as I hinted at above, maybe that’s not such a good thing for you.

    This obviously isn’t the only thing we can do – the party establishment isn’t permanent, after all, and if they can’t do the job right there are plenty out there who can. But will the right people get in? I guess that’s politics for you. It’s a process.

  71. [re=174204]HuskyMescan[/re]:
    Oh, I’m hoping the reaction is for real. I’ve found this little exercise in psyche warfare game to be incredibly entertaining. The GOP mind can neither withstand nor understand a barrage of the absurd. They’re too linear and simple-minded.


  72. OMG. I fucking love you guys. This is the funniest shit I’ve seen since that last Palin interview. Of course, this is funny-ha-ha whereas that was funny-i’m-gonna-go-stab-myself-in-the-brain.

  73. 2821 votes? Is that all Wonkette can conjure? I see its up to 4428 now. WOW.

    Just wait until Stephen Colbert finds out about this shit. Just sayin.

    This is why the Republican party is doomed, long-term: the whole Internet hates them.

  74. [re=174219]bhosp[/re]: It’s not hard, considering the admins have removed all the restrictions that were up even yesterday, such as requiring a valid email. And seeing as though they have made no effort whatsoever the moderate the site, despite this having gone on for hours… yea.

  75. Well, seems the Webadmin finally erased the VOTE VIRUS and chopped off our Nutz.

    Page is now off the main page, and labeled “inappropriate”.

  76. [re=174235]BitterKlingon[/re]: Even republicans can’t resist the power of TruckNutz.

    They probably had to consult with Karl Rove before they decided the trucknutz strategy wouldn’t work.

  77. [re=174243]satyricrash[/re]: …So you try to undermine people who are attempting to change a party, and move it away from supporting endless war, wiretapping, legislating it’s morality, and restricting what people can do with their own bodies?

    It’s just not clicking for me.

  78. This is just like Alaska all over again! Republicans are always SUPPRESSING THE VOTE! The VOICE OF THE PEOPLE!!!

    “Give me liberty, or give me taint. My only regret is that I have but 2 truck nutz to give for my cuntry!”

  79. [re=174248]Rangeley[/re]: A paultard! I thought you were extinct, but here you are!!

    Quick, someone get the paraffin, we must preserve this specimen.

  80. [re=174248]Rangeley[/re]: Dude, you’ve got the WORST of the wingnuttia as the heads of that shithole of a website.

    The idea that Redstate, Townhall, Tim Griffin, Harris and the rest of the batshit nutbags are going to “rebuild” what they’ve destroyed is fucking outrageous.

  81. Butt secks. Rabbits. Per annual Nixons, and of course, more buttsecks.

    Where the fuck is Ken Layne?

    Here’s the input all of America has been looking for:
    Stop. Just stop. STOP.
    Okay that is all.

    – Your Obvious Intellectual Superior

    and P.S.: ATTACK me. Make me FEEL it. It might make YOU feel better, which is important, to mees.

  82. [re=174241]tallulah[/re]:
    Exactly. Also, it’s all about the NUTZ.

    Also, suffering through eight years of a repressive Bushworld climate where everyone who isn’t right of Hitler is considered an un-American traitor and and Enemy of Freedom, watching your country slide ever closer towards endless war and totalitarianism, and being forced to huddle together in tight groups of sane people who’s opinions are deemed heretical tends to fuck with your mind. Obama wins and I suddenly feel like I’ve been liberated from an underground bunker. We’re feeling a somewhat giddy vengefulness towards our GOP oppressors.

  83. [re=174254]Volumptuous[/re]: I don’t view it as them rebuilding, so much as them providing a place for people to say what they think should be done. And low and behold, when they did that the majority of people going to the site were people who want a less invasive government on personal issues. People who want to see the Patriot Act repealed, the government get out of marriage, the endless wars stopped, the budget balanced, the debt reduced.

    The same people they had banned from their sites (at least in the case of Redstate) were back at this one saying the same things they said last year. Would we be ignored again? Well, you certainly helped delegitimize the site through spamming it. As I said before, even if this was the goal, maybe it isn’t such a good thing considering you probably share a lot of common ground with us on these issues.
    [re=174256]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: You aren’t hurting your “gop oppressors.” They love the status quo, and would love for any effort to change the party in the direction we want to be undermined. Rather then undermining them, you helped to undermine those of us who oppose them.

  84. And Rangeley, get a grip. Sites like these are just to keep you “idealistic” and “true conservative” types busy while the big boys meet and decide what they’re doing next with their silly, backwards-looking party.

    Loosen up and have a little fun. You think Rove was going to listen to the comments on the site before the TRUCKNUTZ r(love)ution?

  85. Oh, those Nutz were sooooo good while they lasted. If I had a cigarette, I’d smoke it . . . although I think that now that the Repugs have hit upon a losing strategy, they should stick with it! Palin/racism/religion/war 4 ever!

  86. [re=174264]Bojevus[/re]: Someone else said basically the same thing as you, so I will just quote my previous answer (it is getting rather late afterall):

    I agree with you somewhat, the site was unlikely to have much impact before the spamming. You did a good job reducing the chance even further, but as I hinted at above, maybe that’s not such a good thing for you.

    This obviously isn’t the only thing we can do – the party establishment isn’t permanent, after all, and if they can’t do the job right there are plenty out there who can. But will the right people get in? I guess that’s politics for you. It’s a process.

  87. [re=174261]Rangeley[/re]: Hey dude! YA DUDE!
    Fuck you.
    Fuck off and die. That might be too much for you to handle, but take it as it is.
    Go away, you moronic asshole.

  88. [re=174266]Rangeley[/re]: Small bag of dicks. Not a huge one. Just a small one. You can even add some ranch dressing while you consume it. While I normally agree with Shorts, and I do here, I just think that the bag of dicks that I’d like for you to eat is somewhere in the range of a Larry Craig special, not a Mark Foley.

  89. OT blog meta – Nick Denton sez:

    Get out of categories such as politics to which advertisers are averse. Gawker Media has already spun off Wonkette.

    I bet Nick McDuck would not have turned his nose up at the ad revenue stream coming through this joint the last couple of months. Lack of vision?

  90. [re=174278]schvitzatura[/re]: does anyone even click on the ads?
    Well, we should goddamnit! Wonkette has been my go to source for imporant news these last 6 months. News, snark, and trucknutz. It’s all you need.

  91. [re=174007]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: They’re literally a scrotum that hangs from your back bumper; usually made out of chrome-plated metal, sometimes made from brass. Ideal for when your oversized truck with dangerously raised shocks and giant tires just aren’t sufficiant compensation for an undersized penis.

    Unfortunately, the GOP did not approve of the grassroots movement for truck nutz. Maybe they’ll support the call for a robot Ronald Reagan instead:

    Or obey God’s newest commandment:

    And of course the sad accusations of massive trucknutz voting fraud perpetuated by TruckACORN have begun to appear:

  92. Ha! Did the Paulsied think they were actually going to make a difference in the Grand OLD Party? They should quit their jobs at Burger King and join teh Revolution.

    If our beloved dyslexic Hobbit, Ashley Todd, had spent more time with Trucknutz and less time with the Doc, they might have actually won.

  93. I’m here to campaign for vote for my new entry in the rebuild the GOP contest.

    It’s “Pick some random doofus as GOP spokesperson” and my description is “Why abandon the Joe the Plumber strategy before it’s been completely tested”

    I appreciate your support.

  94. [re=174294]LarryFeltonJ[/re]: That’s well and good, but my understanding is you “hate America enough to pal around with terrorists” and Joe the Plumber said your policies sound like “socialism”.

    Vote Truck Nutz!!! A true American HERO who can fix things!!!

  95. Just as a heads up, the original Truck Nutz comment string is still there, although it’s been pulled from the election results.

    For those who missed the brilliant exchange of opinions, you can find them at:

    Don’t forget to force the GOPer Pyles to face the Truck Nutz issue by voting for:

    Let’s rebuild America from the Nutz up!

  96. Where have all the TruckNutz gone?
    Long time dangling
    Where have all the TruckNutz gone?
    Long time ago
    Where have all the TruckNutz gone?
    GOPers have banned every one
    When will they ever learn?
    When will they ever learn?

  97. Oh shizzzzzz. Check out this zinger from some suggestion about bringing America’s Hottest Governor back onto the national stage:

    Sixty-nine percent (69%) of Republican voters say Alaska Governor Sarah Palin helped John McCain’s bid for the presidency.

    Mmmmmmm. Sixty-nine percent, huh?

  98. [re=174261]Rangeley[/re]: We don’t want the Republican party to reform. We want the Republican party to shrivel up and die, it’s leaders rounded up and herded into cheerless, windy Wyoming gulags, never to darken our front pages again. We want their ideology to be taught in schools as an example of how not to run a country, we want them to be mocked ruthlessly for their ignorance, their pundits portrayed as the soggy sets of syphilitic synapses that they are. We want them to be “no more than a comma” in the history books of our bright, golden future, which we will build with you or without you, thank you very much.

    On the other hand, I rather admire your brave stand. I just consider it misplaced.

  99. [re=174302]gurukalehuru[/re]: As much as you may personally hope for a one party state, it’s not gonna happen. The “” website is being used by people who oppose endless war, oppose an invasive government that intrudes into personal lives, oppose spending the country deep into debt, oppose the patriot act… I don’t see why you would want these ideas to disappear – in fact, it wouldn’t be going out on much of a limb for be to say you probably agree with these ideas.

    A one party state isn’t happening. But what if the two main parties both oppose the above things? While the site most likely wasn’t set up expecting to get the sort of response it got from people who want less government interference in personal lives, that’s just what it got. Spamming the site doesn’t help further those ideas.

  100. [re=174378]Rangeley[/re]: You sound relatively sane and reasonable, and have yet to explode in a fit of rage no matter how much we taunt you. Clearly you do not belong here. Our goal is chaos, not change. Chaos and random buttsecks. And a free beer every once in a while wouldn’t hurt either. Where was I? Oh yeah: Presenting your ideas in a calm, rational manner will only confuse us and make us want to ban you. Please switch to all-caps and ranting. Thanks.

  101. Ken, I’m thinking that a bold “Trucknutz!” t-shirt, in some thundering typeface, would make some money for Wonkette. This whole episode has been one of this site’s proudest moments.

  102. [re=174378]Rangeley[/re]: Making a website thinking that the sea of internet humanity will generate fresh and bold ideas doesn’t help the party. Making a website period doesn’t help the party. Digging the site and telling everybody on RonPaulForums to go vote on it and btw the site doesn’t check for e-mail verificaion (which is spamming) doesn’t help the party. Anything facebooky, bulletin-boardy, and youtubey will not help the party.

    So the site deserves to be mocked and defaced.

    As you do want to reform the party, and for that I’ll tip my hat to you, I will say that doing so requires a different set of actions altogether. Civic involvement is what you seek. Monitoring city hall, letters to the editor, marches, harassing people on the corners for money, working with local officials, community organizing! Now’s your best shot for a generation.

  103. [re=174432]regisgoat[/re]:

    Absolutely, you dorks deserve to make some money off this site, clearly your advertisers aren’t paying much, since they’re all like “Don’t miss this Pamphlet” or “Buy our self-released estrogen-folk CD”

    Where’s the mersh? If you made a shirt that said “Truck Nutz” in arabic like that sign someone had at whatever rally that was, (but not as sloppy), I would buy ten of them.

  104. So I wake up and come into work today only to find that all our efforts yesterday were for naught? This is a sad, sad day for America. Where is Rudy Giuliani I NEED HIM NOW!!!

  105. Holy Shiite! Some woman at my work just posted this firmwide e-mail:

    “Anyone selling a cap for a Ford F-150 6 ft. box”

    A Ford F-150? Coincidence? I think NUT.


  106. Holy shit. We’re pretty funny. A sample of some comments from Barrett808’s thread:

    you people have a pre-9/11 mentality. NEVAR FORGET

    How am I sposed to get any works done when theres all these libruls pissin in mah internets?


    Where my trucknutz at? I need a pair to cling to or I get bitter.

  107. I like this response:

    Tombstonz for trucknutz. From another thread:’All inappropriate and new ideas will be suppressed’. Maybe that’s why the RNC is in such deep doo doo these days. Infiltrated by the gay (foley txt message breakup, whas his cock in the Minneapolis airport bathroom) doesn’t help either.

  108. [re=174113]mattbolt[/re]: whoa, and your reply is now the top search for “big $ale on truck nuts”. Thank god were aren’t using our real names or we’d never get a job again.

  109. trucknutz for all meetup in DC.

    someone name the place and day and time. have trucknutz on yr person. FAKE trucknutz. don’t whip out yer real nutz in public.

  110. [re=174443]illnoise[/re]: I voted for your suggestion.

    STFU, Paultards. This site was clearly put up so that you would mistakenly believe that the GOP gave a rat’s ass about your opinions. As the rest of the GOP believes you all to be simply confused Repulicans, they are trying to “cure” you like they “cure” their gay sons.


  111. [re=174253]Rangeley[/re]: The reason is comedy, dude. Fucking comedy. Is it nice or productive? It’s like making fun of Star Jones’ skin folds. Yes, it’s mean, and perhaps it discourages people who had massive liposuction from leaving their homes, but if makes millions of people happy, who are you to judge?

  112. [re=174428]honore de ballsack[/re], [re=174435]Mista Eko[/re]:
    I agree that civic involvement, and even a general involvement in the political process is absolutely key. Posting ideas on that site wasn’t likely to have a huge impact, and certainly wouldn’t have any at all in a vacuum. But coupled with other things, who knows? Maybe it could help nudge things in the right direction.

    I understand the goal in spamming the site isn’t to effect a change – it’s to have fun and get a few laughs. I don’t have a problem with the goal. Maybe, though, you could find a way to get a laugh that doesn’t help undermine those who are actually seeking change?

  113. Look at cute little Rangeley tilting at those windmills.

    He expects civility and discourse from Wonkette readers. Heh.

    Head to Salon’s forums, Rangeley. Someone might care there.

  114. [re=174248]Rangeley[/re]: I like your style. Now try to think of the internet, with all of its defects, as a libertarian paradise — very few rules and generated mostly through creative chaos. It doesn’t always work. This process of destruction and chaos is usually positive or amusing, right? But it’s not funny when your site gets all fucked up. Hey, but at least your house, pension, job, and life don’t depend on your site not getting fucked up, right?

    So you can put this suggestion on your site: “Start applying lessons learned through empiricism and the real world to black-and-white quasi-religious ideology.”

  115. Uh, someone from the party of Rove, Nixon, Joe McCarthy, and Atwater appeals to our sense of fair play because we promote the private ownership of Trucknutz and the fair treatment of Librarians?

    I cough gray and greasy phlegm into his hand.

  116. [re=174261]Rangeley[/re]:
    Look, in the end who cares? We pulled a stupid, very fun prank. That is all. Nothing is “ruined.” You sound like an OK person, but I think you need to lighten up.

    I’m sorry, but you’re not engineering THE SOLUTION that is going to SOLVE THE GOP PARTY CRISIS, and even if you were, it’s not as if the TRUCKNUTZ invasionary forces were going to derail it. The GOP doesn’t give a fuck about what you think. I’m glad Obama’s in, but do I now think that now somehow everything is going to be different and the Democratic Party is going to do whatever people like me will tell them? Nope.

    Politics is politics. It will never change. If you want a bunch of ridiculous idealistic drama queens, try Kos. Wonkette is for the cynics who’d like a better world, but know how the game is rigged.

    In conclusion, TRUCK NUTZ in 2012!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  117. [re=174804]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: “Wonkette is for the cynics who’d like a better world, but know how the game is rigged.” Best. Wonkette. Description. Ever.

  118. [re=174709]Vewol Mevemont[/re]: Well, I wouldn’t want to start a political debate here, but the lack of laws does not mean a lack of rules. There’s no law that says you can’t swear in other people’s homes, for instance. But if you went to a certain house and it’s owners felt you were causing a disruption, they have the authority to ask you to leave their house and property. You are there because they gave you permission (and you can’t be there without it,) so they can just as easily take it away.

    Similarly, websites, such as, often require you to sign onto a terms of service agreement – a step further then the above in that they tell you up front what they deem unacceptable. outlines as unacceptable, in particular: abuse, harassment, derogatory and discriminatory language, among other things. In registering, you both agree not to engage in that sort of behavior on the site, and recognize that if you break the contract, they reserve the right to stop you.

    Their effectiveness at enforcing their own rules aside (it hasn’t been so impressive,) this is a good example of the concept that power should be decentralized. Rather than the government imposing it’s particular view on what should be allowed in websites and what shouldn’t, sites themselves can determine this, with different sorts of sites having the freedom to determine the right rules for themselves. Obviously, has a different set than, with good reason. They are different sites with different goals. Each site will always be better at drawing the line than the government – not only because they know the sites goals better, but they, unlike the government, are not beholden to special interests and the lure of power – which could distort even an informed government’s decisions on an issue such as this.

    I hope you aren’t arguing for government intervention into where to draw the line as your “real world” solution, as such a power could easily be used to clean this site of the form of “humor” it is built around. I certainly wouldn’t want that – rather, I simply ask that you respect the different rules of other sites, and perhaps find a way to have fun that doesn’t interfere with real efforts to change the country for the better.

  119. [re=174897]Rangeley[/re]: Good Christ, my analogy was very general, not an a call for the internet humor police.

    By the way, your distinction between laws and rules is bogus. The “rules” you gave are only enforceable because they’re backed up by the power of laws. You would be surprised (or perhaps not) at the lack available remedies for intrustions into your website as of just a few years ago. You have some remedies now — mostly ineffective remedies, and remedies that are entirely based upon various computer interference type state and federal laws passed fairly recently. Likewise, your ability to prevent people from swearing in your house is premised upon the existence of certain laws. A better distinction might be between laws conferring “property rights,” and other laws, but even that distinction is too simplistic.

  120. [re=175199]Vewol Mevemont[/re]: I’m not sure how my distinction is bogus? The rules are set by the property owner, not the government. While the government would act as a lost resort enforcer if the property was being used in a way by others against the will of the owner, just what constitutes misuse would be determined by the owner. Meanwhile, it would indeed be a different situation if the government made a law defining what misuse is, for instance outlawing profanity use by guests, preventing people from using a neighbors pool unless the neighbors are present, etc.

  121. [re=174709]Vewol Mevemont[/re]: You do realize that the site wasn’t setup by a Ron Paul supporter? Oh wait, no one here understands reality and that’s why you worship Obama. gj wonktard

  122. [re=175326]wonktard[/re]:
    Blasphemy!!! TRUCKNUTZ are our LORD and GOD and we serve them only. NoBama Hussein is merely the prophet of the TRUCKNUTZ, hallowed be their name.

  123. [re=175326]wonktard[/re]: Count me in with our undead office collegue. I don’t know who this “Obama” lad is, but I’ll only promise to set up an “Obama” shrine once he promises me some trucknutz.

  124. [re=175447]Snarkfest[/re]: Indeed, and apparently that’s irking a few of The Serious People. In response to the helpful suggestion that the GOP contract with Truck Nutz (and before going on an oddly dull rant), the not-so-aptly-labeled Grand asked,”Who invited the Wonktards?” And here I thought helping Republicans was a bi-partisan effort. Hell, I was also under the impression that the internet is no longer merely a single big truck driven by Ted Stevens, but an endless series of motherfucking Truck Nutz. Hey Republican Party: Invite my balls.

  125. Along with my Nutzvote I threw in one for “step away from the religious right.” As one of the few ideas that actually makes sense, it has been unceremoniously removed from the entire site.

Comments are closed.

Previous article
Next articleAmerica Has Looted Beneath Its Couch Cushions And There Is No More Spare Change