Wonkette
The governor of Alaska spent some time in her kitchen this weekend makin’ moose chili and moose hot dogs. Then she sat down with a local reporter and blabbed out a series of words that were mostly English but made zero sense. We will miss her, sort of! She said that no Republican could have won this election, because George Bush has spent the last eight years figuratively standing on the balcony of the nightclub of the Republican brand and drunkenly pissing on the heads of people like Sarah Palin.
At least, that appears to be what she was attempting to imply. It is sort of hard to tell, given Palin’s refusal to OH USE SUBJECTS AND OBJECTS AND VERBS:
I think the Republican ticket represented too much of the status quo, too much of what had gone on in these last eight years, that Americans were kind of shaking their heads like going, wait a minute, how did we run up a 10 trillion dollar debt in a Republican administration? How have there been blunders with war strategy under a Republican administration? If we’re talking change, we want to get far away from what it was that the present administration represented and that is to a great degree what the Republican Party at the time had been representing. So people desiring change I think went as far from the administration that is presently seated as they could. It’s amazing that we did as well as we did.
Oh Jesus. Well, whatever. Also she says she met Tina Fey’s Republican in-laws while she was campaigning.
Palin reflects on her run [Anchorage Daily News]
It’s amazing that we did as well as we did.
She does a fantastic job conveying that one point.
“I think went as far from the administration that is presently seated”
The electorate stayed far from the stench filled bathroom with the backed up toilet where Bush and Co. have been seated.
If George Bush is the pisser, then Sara Palin is the one serving him alcohol. Translation: People like Sarah Palin are the conservative-pushing, gun-toting, religious right-pandering nutjobs that made it possible for George Bush to be elected in the first place!
http://plightofthepumpernickel.blogspot.com
She be stone cold hatin’.
Yay! In a way we won by not losing worse! Yay us! Obama is a loser because he did not win Texas!
I refuse to believe she used that many Gs.
Clearly a legend in her own mind.
Yes. That’s exactly it, Sarah. Just stay in Alaska, now. We’ll call if we need you.
McCainiacs, time to get the knives out. Barbie is becoming Chucky.
Why does she always say “kind of”? ACCEPT REALITY, WOMAN. YOU DID NOT “KIND OF” LOSE.
I know I miss her already. Luckily I just met a few people from Alaska who can keep me in the loop regarding her local hijinks. Who needs all those fancy liberal verbs ‘n’ objects anyway?
PS– you know the picture of “Sarah and her freshly-killed moose?” That was a caribou.
…ummmmmm, maybe the American public had a hard time figuring out who had Downs Syndrome, you or Trig YOU FUKKIN RETARD!
So, is that a Palinese confirmation that McCain would have been 4 more years of the same crap? That’s what I translate it to mean.
In other words, “NOT MY FAULT LOL”
truly, it has been a Golden (Shower) Age
Vewol Mevemont: You see, on a scale of “fucking horrible” and “absolute failure” the Republicans hovered somewhere around “at least I am alive.”
Gee, maybe the fact that McCain voted with Bush 90% of the time had something to do with it, Sarah? Or that McCain was an utter idiot in picking you to be his VP and thus driving away votes in hordes as they contemplated your “leading” this country after WALNUTS! keeled over from an aneurysm while throwing a tantrum. Or that WALNUTS! ran just about the worst campaign ever and couldn’t pick a consistent message to save his life?
Nah, you’re right, you guys were perfect.
“George Bush has spent the last eight years figuratively standing on the balcony of the nightclub of the Republican brand and drunkenly pissing on the heads of people like Sarah Palin.”
And for eight years they liked it so much that they voted for him twice, chanting, “more pee!”
…sorry but I’m having a killer hangover and this phone wont stop fukking ringing!
I’d like to be pee’d on by her.
Quincy Woo: Hey, John McCain is a war hero! Don’t call him a caribou!
And she stood up and spoke out against the things the Republican Party stood for… right, never.
Clearly her statements were transcribed incorrectly. They should have read:
I think the Republican ticket represented too much of the status quo, also too much of what had gone on in Ayres these last eight years, that Americans were kind of shakin’ their heads like going, wait a minute, how did we run up a 10 trillion dollar Ayres debt in a Republican administration also? How have there been blunders with war strategy under a Republican administration also? If we’re talkin’ change, we want to get far away from Ayres what it was that the present administration represented and that is to a great degree what the Republican Party at the time had Ayres been representing also. So people desirin change also I think went as far from the administration that is presently seated as they could also. It’s amazin’ that we also did as well as we did also.
It is really odd to think of her as governor of Alaska instead of the fount of endless humor Sara has been since September. Governors do things like throw people off welfare, close hospitals and destroy infrastructure (Engler-Michigan) or go to jail (many–Illinois) or get shitfaced and act the fool (Gibbons–Nevada).
She doesn’t fit in at all.
In the immortal words of ‘Peggy, The Bard:’ “The Children Are Watching!” Fer Chrissakes woman, speak english.
If we’re talking change, we want to get far away from what it was that the present administration represented and that is to a great degree what the Republican Party at the time had been representing.
I knew it! She voted for Hopey, hence all the secretive “I’m not telling!” talk after she exited the voting booth…
I think I am experiencing a moment of empathy for George Bush - imagine how terrible it must be to be a figure of ridicule to even the Sarah Palins of the world! Does even he deserve that? …yes, yes he totally does. Forget I said anything.
Meh. What, a steady two month diet of word salad, and you expected something different?
And for what it’s worth, here’s the 236.com “humorous” rejected concession speech, also:
http://www.236.com/blog/w/lee_camp/sarah_palins_rejected_concessi_10126.php
Subjects, Objects and Verbs are tricks used by the gotcha librul media.
a haiku:
Vee Pee get off my
Tee Vee, you and your duds, dude
You FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL
Palintards aint going nowhere. God bless their pointed little heads, they are looking forward to 2012 almost as much as I hope she starts campaigning in 2009.
Republicans, who used to yammer on all fucking day about “personal responsibility”, seem to spend about ninety percent of their time blaming their fuck-ups on other people.
I’m starting a Sarah Palin tribute band, but instead of singing we’ll just vomit all over everyone ’til we start a race war.
It will be GWAR meets The Go-Go’s.
“That’s baffled me that all of a sudden two years later, again, never having tried to hide anything with either traveling back and forth to Juneau for first family events that were outside the capital city, in bringing Piper and, once in a while, Willow with me also, that anybody would think that I was trying to hide that they came with me”
What she might be saying (one guess is as good as another) is that there was nothing wrong with using public money to fund travel for her entire family as long as she didn’t try too hard to cover it up.
AngryBlakGuy: Just be grateful you still have a job to go to hungover. Some people have to drink at home.
Neon Trotsky: actually, what happened was, she could not figure out the ballot, much as with the senile folks in FL and the butterfly ballot, so she truly does not know for whom she voted, and thus could not tell us. Either that or she voted for Hopey so McCain would lose and she could throw him under the bus and capitalize on her differences from him in her run for 2012. But that strikes me as too intelligent and calculating for her to figure out.
Doglessliberal: She does strike me as a very calculating figure, it’s just that her maths never add up right.
Bypartizoa: Ah, but “personal responsibility” only applies to minorities and poor people. When you are rich and white and Republican, you maintain that status by stepping on the heads of others and using connections to get places in life without working.
Let’s not cheer her departure just yet. Who knows, maybe she’ll try to get Ted Stevens’ Senate seat…
Apparently someone did a survey last week, and something like 64% of Republicans want her to run again in 2012. I guess after 8 years of Bush, they’re just used to the stupid.
Good god, Sarah Palin makes my teeth itch. Can we please send her to some remote corner of the earth, like Mongolia, or the CW?
On the bright side: Good news from “the science” about why i have to get absolutely hosed every night to deal with Palin and her ilk. It’s because i’m so smrt!
http://urbzen.com/2008/11/09/martinis-taste-like-happy/
oh, and more Palin genius:
http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2008/11/im-trigs-mom.html
also… why is she wearing the jacket from Thriller?
NoWireHangers: …unfortunately I broke my one rule about drinking; “hangovers are for people dumb enough to stop drinking.”
She’s not going to be nearly as cute when menopause strikes
AngryBlakGuy: So are livers
Two thoughts:
Sure, kick a man when he’s down lower in the disapproval ratings than any President is polling history.
Sara Palin: just the victim (albeit the victim with a very nice wardrobe).
I nominate Caribou Barbie to be President of TeeVee in 2012:
Linda Mann, president of Mann Media, which books celebrities and fashionistas for TV, noted, “Her buzz is incredible. She has car-wreck appeal. You’re compelled to watch, hoping she’ll say the dumbest things possible. I’d propose a show combining her love of fashion and lack of brainpower - ‘Project Dumbway.’ “
http://www.nypost.com/seven/11092008/gossip/pagesix/talent_shops_courting_palin_137849.htm
For me to take a critique of the Bush Administration seriously, it would help if the person doing it hadn’t tried to ape everything lowbrow and shortsighted about Dubya but without the requisite “intelligence” he displayed. Oh well, here’s hoping Kristol and PNAC2 make her a more credible bullshit vessel for 2012, we’ll probably really need a war with Iran by then.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
On the flip side - although it’s natural for a candidate to feel a little blue after losing an election, how elated must Walnuts be now that he doesn’t have to put up with four years of this crap?
Billy Kristol needs to slap a biatch for shit-talking his war.
Being Alaskan, Mooselini has a large backyard.
Matt Lauer is supposed to be heading up to South Russia to interview our little snow queen soon. If Matt calls her “glib” I will have a happy.
Good for her, I guess. She only “kind of” lost and she and her entire family got a new wardrobe. This weekend she said that the RNC was NOT coming to Alaska and that she’d send them a list. Yeah, right.
Doglessliberal: Can we also add that next to Paris Hilton, what an embarrassment to 21st century women she is? I’m sure somewhere Geraldine Ferraro and Harriet Christian must be proud.
If we’re talking change, we want to get far away from what it was that the present administration represented and that is to a great degree what the Republican Party at the time had been representing. Representing been had time the at Party Republican the what degree great a to is that and represented administration present the that was it what from away far get to want we change talking we’re if.
Palin/Ouroboros 2012!
Clearly Sarah Palin has been PEED ON BY PROFESSIONALS!
Livejournal trolls post “LOL Furry” in the furry communities, can we write “LOL Repubs” whenever we have a Repup post?
How come she did not tell that to Joe the Plumber? Retard….
Sarah Palin prepping for debates.
JadedDIssonance: I agree with you on that one. Then again, I’ve been wondering if McCain planned to lose all along just to get even with Bush et al, for what they did to him in 2000. I just find it weird that even though Palin had this rockstar entourage to fly back to alaska, McCain unceremoniously went home, after giving a surprisingly gracious concession speech.
I haven’t heard him talking to the media either. Meanwhile, Palin can’t stay out of the media.
her english is like that of a 13 year-old trying really really hard to meet that 500 word limit
why does the teacher require 500 words anyway?! well, better just repeat myself a few more times to make sure nobody knows what I’m saying. at least it looks like I’m saying a lot.
If ya can’t dazzle ‘em with brilliance, baffle ‘em with bullshit. You betcha. *wink*
Schadenfried: It’s all about how to win in the end. I believe that in a few years, her training as the next Head Puppet of the Unrestrained Capitalists will be complete. Somebody has to take advantage of all the empty space. Then we invade Russia, also.
You forgot the also’s.
I said lot’s of also’s, also.
-SP
I hope we can look forward to a new blame for the Tragic Republican Loss every week from here to Christmas!
I hope Sarah Palin’s entire career henceforth is her talking to various people about what happened in 2008 to make them lose!
What war? Are we still at war?
PALIN thinks BUSH turned off voters?
Isn’t that the anus calling the asshole brown.
Larry Fine: Thank you for keeping the tone of conversation right down in the gutter…where it belongs.
Schadenfried: Wait a sec. At least Paris can string together a coherent sentence, and she did a good job of memorizing her lines in that anti-McCain video.
Who is Sarah Palin?
Moose chili cooked in the crock pot and moose hot dogs lay on the table.
Okay, we get it! You like to kill/cook moose! Jesus! Enough already.
She makes a good point, though. “It’s amazing that we did as well as we did.”
Downright frightening, I’d say.
48% of the American electorate is still retarded.
Bypartizoa: Amen! You are so right. In fact has she taken the blame for anything? I guess it’s just easier to blame witches and evil forces for her total inadequacy.
The Pumpernickel: Miller: Hey dudes, if you think your blogs are so awesome that you have to link them at the bottom of *every single* comment, how about you show Our Dear Wonkette some love and buy some add space instead?
From this interview I learned:
Tina Fey has Hillbilly relatives and Caribou Barbie is never going away. –stop–
Last night Suckabee had Joe the Douchbag and Tito the Tarantula as his guests. Have they not figured out that this is not a winning combo?
She gives new meaning to the term, “word salad!”
Nanks: WIN.
NotthatLC: “they’re just used to the stupid.”
Used to stupid? They ARE stupid so they wouldn’t know. I’m still so happy about Hopey, I wonderin’ if I should to have an abortion to celebrate.
JadedDIssonance: When you pull Caribou Barbie’s string, she says “Maths are hard!”
DustBowlBlues: at least one per week. I think that is the new requirement under Hopey Admin, right?
Figuratively in what respect, Sarah?
NotthatLC: And according to Paul Begala on Bill Mahre’s show the other night, 100% of Democrats want her to run too!
Dear God, please let Sarah Palin be gored by a pissed-off bull moose during rutting season. Thank you in advance for answering my prayer.
The pig is ready for some more lipstick. Let us keep her safe and sound and primed with confidence to take a leadership role in the Republican Party. To prove her readiness, she will now go outside in her flannel pjs and use a kitchen knife to kill and skin a grizzly.
Meanwhile, somewhere in America, Bill Kristol and Rich Lowry are jacking-off.
a brain like a fuckin’ Yahtzee cup.
Tomthebunny: I’d spring for pay-per-view to watch her debate Hopey.
Caribou Barbie’s giving news interviews, WALNUTS! is going on Leno…
They DO know they lost the election, don’t they? I mean, that’s not going to change, Thank You Jeebus!
I mean, I don’t remember the loosing party still getting this much face time….
Just made the error of reading the entire interview. Speaking of hangovers.
Whenever I finished reading one of her tortured responses and then read one of the questions (which were normal English) it was like that moment right after you hurl when you briefly feel better, and have false hope that the next few minutes will feel better, too. But then I’d read her response and the nausea would come right back.
Moose hot dogs are just moose penises, right?
Oh, and I thought Sara was just snarking when she said “moose chili and moose hot dogs.” I should have learned by now that you don’t have to make this shit up.
I thought McCain told her to “get rid of that Bush”.
grendel: She’s right. If he were so good, he would have had 100% of the vote. Why can’t Barry close the deal? Why is he so ineffective?
I didn’t even know they had trailer parks in Alaska!
Schadenfried: Did Ferraro ever shout her support for the xVPILF from the trees? Did she make any statement? I need to know
Sarah is adored by the bible-belt wingnuts that evidently makeup the majority of the electorate in south-central Alaska. I think it will take a protracted economic meltdown to shake up the demographics enough to turn the state back to some common sense. Ironically Alaska was heavily Democrat in the 50s and 60s, so much so that it impeded progress when the territory was trying to become a state-a conservative coalition in Congress didn’t want to threaten cloture with 2 additional Democrat Senators.
red america has the largest percentage of trailer parks in the world.
“It’s amazing that we did as well as we did.”
You mean the worst result since 1932? If that’s your idea of success, no wonder you are a triumph in Alaska.