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MODERN ART FORMS

Ron Reagan Not Impressed With Rahm Emanuel’s Dancing

Everybody in America knows exactly three things about Rahm Emanuel: he sent a dead fish once to somebody he did not care for; he is kind of a dick to everyone, but in a good way; and he used to be a dancer. But but! Some important details regarding that third point have come to light — details that the American electorate has a right to know.

First off, he did not just do ballet! He did modern dance, too.

Second and most importantly, he was never as advanced a dancer as Ron Reagan, the president’s son.

Reagan, like Emanuel, is a former dancer. (Emanuel received dance training in high school, and danced for a year at Sarah Lawrence after turning down a scholarship to the Joffrey Ballet School; as a freshman, he appeared in a modern-dance piece called “Desire.”) Reagan, who was a professional dancer for four years, didn’t completely buy the comparison: “I’m not trying to knock him or anything, but, O.K., it’s like if I’m a well-known actor—not a big star, but I appear in movies—and you’re talking about someone who was in the drama club in high school.”

Oh ho ho ho, Ron Reagan is a diva. Really though, and here is the important part, in that YouTube up there at the beginning of this post, Barack Obama makes a funny joke about Rahm Emanuel adapting Machiavelli’s The Prince for dance. It is good this tape did not come to light before the election, because it is INCENDIARY.

Emanuel in Full [New Yorker]
Political Roast : Obama Emauel 2005 [YouTube]


10:09 AM on Mon November 10 2008
By Sara K. Smith
14181 Views

  1. Blue Line says at 10:17 am, November 10th, 2008

    Hold me closer, tiny dancer.

  2. four things: he’s missing half a finger! wait, five, his middle name is “Israel”

  3. If you make fun of Rahm wearing those tights, you will certainly regret it.

  4. Come here a minute says at 10:23 am, November 10th, 2008

    Money quote: “Has he ever flashed that little stubby thing at you? It’s appalling.”

  5. Jewdishoowary Square says at 10:24 am, November 10th, 2008

    Just watch: it will be no more than a few days before we all start getting “Rahm-rolled.”

  6. Upthruster says at 10:26 am, November 10th, 2008

    I think Ron Reagan took dance because he kept seeing his mom fall down and thought, “I can’t be associated with her…”

  7. obfuscator says at 10:28 am, November 10th, 2008

    Now Ron & Rahm must stage an urban dance fight in a parking garage, just like the video for “Bad”.

  8. Ron Reagan and Rahm Emanuel star in Jon Waters new movie/musical “Demo Dance Derby”.

  9. Woodwards Friend says at 10:29 am, November 10th, 2008

    Maybe Rahm and Barack can unite the nation with an awkwardly homoerotic dance montage in a grain mill like Kevin Bacon and Chris Penn in Footloose.

  10. wtf_files says at 10:30 am, November 10th, 2008

    I love that Barry cracks himself up with the Macchiavelli joke. That and “has he flashed that little stubby thing at you?” THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID.

  11. He’s also FUNNY.

  12. he is kind of a dick to everyone, but in a good way

    A good dick is often necessary for a wonderful screw.

    A fellow dancer, eh? No wonder. I know many who are dicks and the ballet people are the worst. Prima Dons.

  13. He could do the Nutcracker, but I guarantee, SOMEBODY is gettin’ hurt.

  14. Blue Line: It’s not “Tony Danza?”

  15. Reminds me of the story about Ron and Nancy going to one of young Ron’s performances, and afterwards going backstage and of course most of the dancers were gay, but old Ron wanted to reassure them that he thought they were not gay, so he kept talking about how Gene Kelly was one of his good friends and he was “all man.” And the dancers were like, “Whatever, Mary.”

  16. Robbertjan says at 10:44 am, November 10th, 2008

    wtf_files: That went over the head of half the crowd.

  17. God, he’s cute. The best part is when he laughs at his own Machiavelli joke.

  18. Am I the only one who smells a furious dance-off in one of the White House ball rooms? “Take My Breath Away” or “Footloose”? Or both?

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

  19. illnoise: Obviously he’s fucking Yakuza.

  20. Das Storminator says at 10:50 am, November 10th, 2008

    “rendered him practically mute”

  21. hockeymom says at 10:50 am, November 10th, 2008

    Is anybody else interested in Emanuel’s choice of Sarah Lawrence for college?

  22. Ron Reagan found dead with mouth stuffed with dead fish… assumed to be a suicide.

  23. Woodwards Friend says at 10:53 am, November 10th, 2008

    Miller: I’m thinking Butters in the You Got Served South Park episode. Oh hamburgers!

  24. GayInMaine says at 10:53 am, November 10th, 2008

    I’m a star, dammit! A star! That other guy wouldn’t even win Dancing With The Stars, that’s how far away frome being a star like me he is.

  25. Deepthroat says at 10:54 am, November 10th, 2008

    obfuscator: Oh please, GOD, let that happen!

  26. Rahm Emanuel: blurring the line between modern dance and epilepsy.

  27. Deepthroat says at 11:03 am, November 10th, 2008

    wow, Rahm’s mother sounds AWESOME:

    Rahm Israel Emanuel was the family peacemaker and an accomplished dancer. His mother disputes Rahm’s account of his upbringing: “Every article I see,” Marsha Emanuel told Bendavid, “he says, ‘My mother forced me to dance.’ Forgive me, you little s—head,” she adds, addressing her son rhetorically, “I didn’t force you, I forced your brothers.”

    http://blogs.chron.com/txpotomac/2008/11/whos_rahm_emanuel_hes_a_jewish.html

  28. The Cold Sea says at 11:04 am, November 10th, 2008

    I hope the story about Raham’s brother Ari being the prototype for Ari Gold on Entourage is true.

  29. Texan Bulldoggette says at 11:07 am, November 10th, 2008

    Ummm…is Ron Reagan actually bragging that he’s a better girly dancer than Rahm? If I were Ronny, I’d just let that one go.

  30. Oh God, Barry is doing his jew material. I swear, his inauguration speech is going to be a live HBO RAW & UNCUT AT THE WHITE HOUSE special.

  31. OfTheTheatricalPersuasian says at 11:20 am, November 10th, 2008

    I think I’d eat a dead fish, newspaper and all, if I could get a hold of a photograph of Rahm dancing…anybody know of one?

  32. lawrenceofthedesert says at 11:31 am, November 10th, 2008

    grendel: Not Machiavellian enough — Ron awakes with partner to find a huge Asian carp from the Illinois River next to him on the pillow, still wiggling.

  33. frumious_bandersnatch says at 11:37 am, November 10th, 2008

    Woodwards Friend: omg I would pay so much money for that…

  34. the invisible woman says at 11:39 am, November 10th, 2008

    Deepthroat: But his father is even MORE awesome:

    “Emanuel’s father Benjamin was quoted in an article about Rahm headlined “Our Man in the White House” in the Israeli daily Ma’ariv last week, saying ‘Obviously he will influence the president to be pro-Israel. Why wouldn’t he? What is he, an Arab? He’s not going to clean the floors of the White House.’” http://mideast.blogs.time.com/2008/11/09/obama-mideast-watch-rahm-emanuel/.

    So we’ve got mean mom, racist dad, psycho agent brother, and Rahm sending people dead fish. This family is going to entertain us for years. I thought Ron Reagan was gay for a long time, but he’s been married for decades. I thought the Rahm dead fish story was a joke, but it’s actually true. So clearly I have problem reading heterosexual male dancers. They’re very mysterious.

    I cannot wait to see what happens with Rahm Emanuel and Joe Biden in the room together giving the drama to Obama. (Notice Biden hasn’t made a statement about how great Rahm is.) They both have short tempers, huge egos, and say crazy crap. How is Obama going to get anything done while keeping these two divas on a leash? This white house is going to be Drama Central, complete with interpretive dance battles.

  35. GollyGeeWilly says at 11:54 am, November 10th, 2008

    New Show “Dancing with the politicians”! Could be ……lame.

  36. Gorillionaire says at 11:59 am, November 10th, 2008

    True Story: my first job was as a stage hand at my hometown civic center. I was working there when the Josten’s Ballet Company, with Ron Reagan in tow, came to perform. I was interviewed by the Secret Service and everything, everybody working that night was. The best part was being backstage and hearing the performers, Ron included, in the dressing rooms putting on their makeup and stuff. They were listening to some heavy metal on a little boom box, I’m pretty sure it was Iron Maiden, and all making wise cracks about the little North Carolina cowtown they were getting ready to perform in. I think I heard Ron say that something like “we will probably get paid in BBQ and cow chips”.

  37. shortsshortsshorts says at 12:26 pm, November 10th, 2008

    “I’m not trying to knock him or anything, but, O.K., it’s like if I’m a well-known actor—not a big star, but I appear in movies—and you’re talking about someone who was in the drama club in high school.”

    is he talking about the 40th President of the United States, who was a B-rated actor who did a few movies? Meh. Whatever.

  38. Itsjustme says at 12:27 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Miller: West Side Story?

  39. agentstinky says at 12:38 pm, November 10th, 2008

    That was pretty funny. Did Obama write this stuff?

  40. psychedelicSludge says at 12:38 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Now is the time on Realpolitik when we DANCE!

  41. marioninnyc says at 12:44 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Notice how back then Obama had no gray hair?

  42. populucious says at 12:57 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Oh, I thank you for this piece very much, since I’ve spent the last week fighting a burgeoning passion for Monsieur Emmanuel (totally against my will, I spent the weekend combing all the news shows for Rahm-bits). But now, the image of him in a pas de deux with Ron Regan has annhilated any unseemly feelings I may have been developing.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you!

  43. As I recall, Ron Reagan only got into Joffrey II because his dad was the president. I knew some Joffrey dancers at the time and I heard he was not good. He’s got balls to tell the world that Rahm was a lesser dancer, really. Besides, Ron Reagan started training at the age of 17, a lot later than Emanuel.

  44. nathanexplosion says at 1:34 pm, November 10th, 2008

    I hope all is forgiven by now! http://tinyurl.com/5ovr5n

  45. finallyhappy says at 1:38 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Yes, his brother is absolutely the Jeremy Piven character on Entourage- and Rahm was the model for a character on West Wing. The WaPO had a piece some months ago about Rahm and Ari teasing their 3rd brother who is Director of Bioethics at NIH saying sure, you’re the DOCTOR- but you don’t have a TV character yet. Also I read that Rahm was still taking dance lessons(although who knows)

  46. american mutt says at 2:31 pm, November 10th, 2008

    I thought Barry was going to end that with a loving, “You’re an asshole, Rham.”

  47. NameBilly says at 2:35 pm, November 10th, 2008

    So, Rahm Emanuel, kind of a dancing David Mamet.
    TGY: yessiree, Primo Dons, the ballet folks are the worst. Modern dancers need a sense of humour at least to handle the ‘whatever’ mod. dance choreography can call for.

  48. Bearbloke says at 4:20 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Texan Bulldoggette: “Ron, honey, don’t go there girlfriend….”

  49. TexasCowGirl says at 4:30 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Min: He’s such an adorkable nerd when he makes himself chuckle.

  50. marioninnyc: He hadn’t gotten to know Hillary very well yet.

  51. DangerousLiberal says at 7:41 pm, November 10th, 2008

    Jewdishoowary Square: You say that like it’s a bad thing.

  52. I’m not even sure exactly what kind of sassiness this is, or in what universe it’s, like, okay to be arrogant about being a straight man who Danced. Professionally. Cause, awkward. I’ll accept it from Rahm, because he’s Jewish and I’ve loved him forever and he went to Sarah Lawrence and understands why binary gender codes suck and…Sigh. But, seriously, Ron Reagan (who I generally like) comes off sounding like the bitchy chick in Center Stage. Like, “Oh, please, bitch, I Danced at blah blah blah French academy of gayness! And you’re a whore!” And Rahm Emanuel, only the 2nd most important guy in the White House, some more. Again.

  53. shortsshortsshorts: Basically. I thought it was supposed to be ironic.

  54. Hm. It’s a step down from having a President who’s a cheerleader.

    But dance line is still pretty good.

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