• February 14, 2012

For those of you at your very professional workplaces, here is the text of Sarah Palin’s latest verbal feat of derring-do: “What do they [The Liberals!] think? Do they think the terrorists have all the sudden become the good guys and changed their minds? No, the terrorists still seek to destroy America and her allies and all that it is that we stand for: freedom, tolerance, and equality. The terrorists have not changed their minds.” We at Wonkette do, in fact, believe that the terrorists have become the good guys. You can see Osama & Pals doing Habitat for Humanity work in the streets of any major American city. Planting new trees, picking up trash. Can’t anyone get a second chance, Sarah? [HuffPo]

{ 78 comments }

sk1win November 3, 2008 at 2:40 pm

I think Obama is finally going to take their bait and start using the word victory, a lot. Starting tomorrow night in Grant Park.

Custerwolf November 3, 2008 at 2:42 pm

No, the terrorists have not changed their minds, Sarah. They’ve just decided to sit back and relax a spell while you do their job of destroying America.

TGY November 3, 2008 at 2:42 pm

Only…one more day…and it’s STFU time for the Klondike Dilly bar.

Worlds End November 3, 2008 at 2:43 pm

[re=161306]sk1win[/re]:Ha that was good. This woman is absolutely insane

thejames@thejamesrocket.com November 3, 2008 at 2:43 pm

Oh hell yes. I will be using the word victory a whole lot.

liquiddaddy November 3, 2008 at 2:43 pm

I hear G. Gordon Liddy is very active in Meals on Wheels.

a-petit dejeuner November 3, 2008 at 2:44 pm

I can’t even say something right now. Just when you thought everything’s over,
you’re bombarded by total ineptness that tops the last one and you’re just overwhelmed.

The stupidity, it hurts.

norbizness November 3, 2008 at 2:45 pm

I heard that they’re also seeking to destroy rock-bottom prices at the Mall of the Americas, puppy love, and the space-time continuum. God, she’s like a Free Republic stupidity-golem.

Dave J. November 3, 2008 at 2:45 pm

Chuckles there behind her (our left, her right) is reaaaaaaally checking out that ass.

Spackle Camshaft Palin November 3, 2008 at 2:45 pm

I love how she’s using the word “terrorist” roughly every two sentences there.

Hey guys, before you vote for whatsisname, perhaps you should reconsider, because TERRORISTS TERRORISTS TERRORISTS TERRORISTS TERRORISTS

Lionel Hutz Esq. November 3, 2008 at 2:45 pm

But Obama gets along so well with terrorist like Bill Ayers, Nancy Pelosi and Keith Olbermann…

Worlds End November 3, 2008 at 2:45 pm

WTF???????????????????????????????????
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2008/11/spooky-defense.html

BillyClubb November 3, 2008 at 2:46 pm

“The terrorists have not changed their minds.”

And neither have the voters! HENGH?! HENGH?! Sarah, you had a good run, but it’s just about over.

jilly November 3, 2008 at 2:46 pm

You just remember Sarah Palin, terrorists are people too.

ph7 November 3, 2008 at 2:46 pm

Check out the Fox banner “Palin: We need a leader who isn’t afraid to the use the word ‘Victory’”

Something tells me the wingnuts will soon have their fill of fearless Barry using the word repeatedly tomorrow night.

mattbolt November 3, 2008 at 2:47 pm

WHAT terrorists? Is this the Ayers bullshit, or is she doing yet another Obama/Osama mindfuck where she convinces people that the man who will become President tomorrow is an Indonesian Taliban-trained suicide bomber who will detonate suitcase nukes with the help of the ghost of Saddam Hussein in their local West Virginia Wal-Mart? You can’t just say stuff like this, Sarah! It’s slanderous insane and wrong!

Oh God, I’d be pissed if it weren’t for the fact you were being shipped back to Alaska tomorrow as an empty shell of damaged goods.

ShortShadey November 3, 2008 at 2:47 pm

Wow, I had no idea that Obama thinks the terrorists are the good guys! I was undecided until I saw that speech, but now I’m voting for McCain-Palin!

Durrrrr.

norbizness November 3, 2008 at 2:48 pm

She’d use the term 9/11 more, but Rudy and his law firm got that shit copyrighted and she ain’t so good with numbers.

Giant Robot November 3, 2008 at 2:48 pm

Terrorists vs. Cling-ons! Who can get more pennies trick-or-treating for Unicef?

Sarah Palin (vp@whitehouse.gov) November 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm

NO!

emberglance November 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm

I hate this woman. Because she stands for everything I hate. Freedom, tolerance and equality.

Monkey November 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm

Wait a minute! The terrorists are the bad guys? It all makes sense now.

Godot November 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm

I had a good chuckle at Sarah Palin saying we have to defend tolerance.

The Decider November 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm

My prediction is that Caribou Barbie starts spending a whole lot of time “outside” Alaska, leaving the Lt. Governor to handle things while she sets up her new life. She’s gotten a taste of the spotlight and it’s like crack to her.

dano November 3, 2008 at 2:51 pm

Palin isn’t going away after the election. Thanks to McCain & co. the fundies have found their new queen. She’s going to milk the fuck out of her new celebrity. Just get used to seeing that face and hearing that awful voice. She’s the new head of the opposition party.

mattbolt November 3, 2008 at 2:51 pm

Can this election go on forever, please? I’m gonna miss this, all this magic we have here.

V572625694 November 3, 2008 at 2:52 pm

All right, where’s that October Surprise we’ve all been waiting for? ‘Cause Sarah saying libruls say terrorists are the good guys isn’t going to change many votes. WALNUTS! should’ve been nicer to Chimpy all these years.

But my friends, be warned: however this comes out, we’re not going to be rid of Miss Winkie. She’s as attracted to fame as Roger Ailes is to attractive chattering wingnuts, and she’ll be getting a Fox paycheck very, very soon.

Schmannity November 3, 2008 at 2:52 pm

Hey, it’s the terrorist perogative. Terrorists don’t follow the rules, like changing their minds. They are very maericky

Lascauxcaveman November 3, 2008 at 2:52 pm

I had a flat on the side of the highway and a guy wearing a kaffiyeh and driving a old beater sand-brown Toyota pickup with the back filled with AKs-47s, IEDs and Al Quaeda literature stopped and helped me change the tire.

Not so good with the english, but smart enough to know about the @#%& backwards lug nut threads on my old Plymouth.

Thanks, Mr. Terrist!

Meth Lab for Cutie November 3, 2008 at 2:53 pm

her voice is raga music to my ears.

Uncle Al November 3, 2008 at 2:54 pm

Her 15 minutes are just……….about…………up.

Have a good trip back to Alaska, Sarah Dipshit.

Don’t let the door kick you in the ass on your way out.

Let us know when Bristol and Levi set a date.

Otherwise, don’t call us…..

Mara47 November 3, 2008 at 2:54 pm

[re=161340]mattbolt[/re]: You can’t just say stuff like this, Sarah! It’s slanderous insane and wrong!

Annnnnnd Sarah’s first amendment rights end THERE. Right there, at the Gate of Litigation. Gentlemen (and ladies), start your amicus briefs…

HuskyMescan November 3, 2008 at 2:55 pm
PoliTacky November 3, 2008 at 2:55 pm

My fist wants to start a culture war with her face.

Also, how does she know so much about ‘the terrorists?’ Are they sending emails outlining their plans and feelings to her unsecured yahoo email account?

PortlandSmartAss November 3, 2008 at 2:56 pm

Which speechwriters have drunk the straw man koolaid? All of them?
E.g. “do they think terrorists have become the good guys?”
E.g. “are they saying that we should take away babies and kill them?”
E.g. “are they saying that we should disband our democracy and let Hugo Chavez rule this country?”

Please, please, please, let them get hammered hard tomorrow.

problemwithcaring November 3, 2008 at 2:56 pm

C’moooon Terroriiiiiists! Do something…We’re losing!

Valkyrie November 3, 2008 at 2:56 pm

No, she said “terrists.” These are the earth people…hobbits and such, with their hoarding of preciousss gold that belong to USssssss!

Sussemilch November 3, 2008 at 2:59 pm

Palin says “victory is coming” and I for one agree.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Warsaw_Nike_02.jpg

slappypaddy November 3, 2008 at 3:00 pm

[re=161372]PoliTacky[/re]:”Also, how does she know so much about ‘the terrorists?’”

My thoughts exactly, almost. How does she know so much about what’s going on in the minds of the terrorists? It’s very suspicious.

Kingbee November 3, 2008 at 3:01 pm

I, for one, welcome the opportunity to be rid of our idiot overlords. Bye-bye, Republicfucks.

Worlds End November 3, 2008 at 3:02 pm

[re=161371]HuskyMescan[/re]: Huh

Rush November 3, 2008 at 3:04 pm

Give her credit for fighting until the “bitter” end

longjohnson November 3, 2008 at 3:04 pm

Gov. Palin is the white Omarosa!

sealhugger November 3, 2008 at 3:04 pm

After this Sarah is going to have a very promising career marketing her stylish hockey stick covers made from the fur of wolves on QVC.

ClueHeywood November 3, 2008 at 3:05 pm

Great, now all those former terrorists I’ve hired from Job Corps are going to turn on me Wednesday morning. Thanks for the heads up, Sarah!

Sassette November 3, 2008 at 3:05 pm

I kind of can’t believe she hasn’t started calling Obama a Satan-worshipping Wiccan because he read the Harry Potter books with his daughter. Try to keep up, Sarah!

fuckinredneck November 3, 2008 at 3:06 pm

Didn’t this lady say that it’s all up to god now?

Does this mean that if Obama wins, god’s in the tank? Because if he’s in our tank, who the hell is in theirs?!

PoliTacky November 3, 2008 at 3:10 pm

[re=161385]slappypaddy[/re]: She has joined with them in a Terra-Rist Klingon Mind Meld… oh, dammit, that’s the Vulcans.

Deepthroat November 3, 2008 at 3:10 pm

Um, Sarah, I think America is actually a hermaphrodite. Sexist.

CooterMarie November 3, 2008 at 3:11 pm

[re=161349]Godot[/re]: Thought the same thing. I think this is actually brilliant. So when Hopey wins, and one of her nutjob stalkers goes rogue and in a giant roid rage, flinging poo and hurting people, she won’t be held responsible for causing any of it. She can say, “I have been encouraging Tolerance, so I’m glad to be cleared of any wrongdoing”.

johnbpt November 3, 2008 at 3:13 pm

Stick a fork in her. Not because she’s done, but because I’d really just like to see a fork protruding from her.

norbizness November 3, 2008 at 3:15 pm

God’s too busy engineering college and pro football comebacks based on the teams’ relative devoutness to worry his pretty little head about trivial shit like elections.

Giant Robot November 3, 2008 at 3:16 pm

Allies? What allies? Oh yeah, the ones who are unanimously in the tank for Obama…

WadISay November 3, 2008 at 3:16 pm

This screaching imbecile’s voice makes me nostaligic for when I could fall asleep on the sofa listening to the dulcet and soothing lullaby of Hillary Clinton.

slappypaddy November 3, 2008 at 3:19 pm

[re=161402]fuckinredneck[/re]: “Does this mean that if Obama wins, god’s in the tank? Because if he’s in our tank, who the hell is in theirs?!”

Think about it a moment, it’ll come to you.

One Yield Regular November 3, 2008 at 3:20 pm

This is long but great, and a very good reminder of why we don’t want this linguistically and intellectually challenged clump of fur anywhere near the White House:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2008/nov/02/george-bush-legacy-usa

Gopherit November 3, 2008 at 3:30 pm

Is it possible that Wasilla misses an entire family of idiots?

nurple November 3, 2008 at 3:30 pm

Norb – the Almighty is heavily involved in all award-winning hip-hop.

Giant Robot November 3, 2008 at 3:31 pm

The internets are reporting that Walnuts’ & Palin’s crowds are much tinier than expected today. True?

ManchuCandidate November 3, 2008 at 3:32 pm

[re=161437]Gopherit[/re]:
Judging by what I saw on the Daily Show, No. Plenty of redundancy in Stupidity.

suecris November 3, 2008 at 3:33 pm

Has anyone else noticed the hair – the high beehive thing is back! It’s been gone for about 6 weeks. I guess she threw out the RNC hairdressers!

Gopherit November 3, 2008 at 3:43 pm

[re=161443]suecris[/re]: So is the red dress she “gave away.”

I swear, there has to be an audible whistling near her head on windy days.

[re=161441]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Damn, I was hoping they’d want her back. This stupid moose-killer is going to be on TV for the next 4 years.

Vewol Mevemont November 3, 2008 at 3:45 pm

[re=161352]The Decider[/re]: Judging by her performance in interview, rallies, and debates, I think she’s also had a tast of non-metaphorical crack.

c-freak November 3, 2008 at 4:01 pm

thanks sarah! freedom, tolerance and equality. i’ll be sure to invite you to my big lesbo wedding.

cal November 3, 2008 at 4:06 pm

MITTENS/GLASSES 2012!!!1!

JoeFannyPack November 3, 2008 at 4:10 pm

Perhaps this is just the exception but this morning as I was walking to work some guy handed me his pipe bomb and a bag full of a powdery white substance so that he could help an old lady cross the street. I’m just saying.

larz November 3, 2008 at 4:11 pm

I’ll be so happy when I don’t have to hear Mooseburger Helper say things her down syndrome infact cringes at anymore.

Valkyrie November 3, 2008 at 4:44 pm

Earlier she says, “And there must be something about San Francisco and he.” Tell us…what is it about he? Is him not like us in a rainbow-decal/leather-chaps kind of way?

middleamerican November 3, 2008 at 4:49 pm

I can’t wait for this snowbilly to slither back to Alaska. She embodies everything that is wrong in politics.

nurple November 3, 2008 at 5:06 pm

If she hates San Francisco, she better not count on any money from Bank of America. Maybe Natalie Tieger will run and clean her clock.YUm.

thebeatgoeson November 3, 2008 at 5:11 pm

johnbpt: Win!!

huffybike November 3, 2008 at 5:34 pm

Oh my God, she is so right! http://tinyurl.com/5w9k9o

Scandalabra November 3, 2008 at 5:57 pm

When is this nasty, wretched, ignorant little piece of piece of frozen pond scum going to go away???? Even my right-wing retired Navy colonel uncle is getting embarrassed.

Modok November 3, 2008 at 6:50 pm

[re=161333]Worlds End[/re]: WTF???????????????????????????????????
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2008/11/spooky-defense.html

CIA hires contractor to contain rowdy voters… in Oregon?

A.) Waaayyy too much weed and mushrooms laying around for that.

B.) And you’d think that the government might know that Oregonians vote by mail…

http://www.co.multnomah.or.us/dbcs/elections/election_information/voting_in_oregon.shtml

Nicole Wallace is now doing her Bill Kristol mating call of Bizarro-Speak about how Palin is exactly what they wanted. Can I order a Giant Ape to smash her and Tucker Bounds together like a couple of thunder sticks?

the invisible woman November 3, 2008 at 8:54 pm

It’s hard to tell if she’s stupid or if she thinks her audience is stupid, which is why she talks to them like 3-year olds, or if its just one big clusterfuck of total stupidity? Just listening to her will make you lose IQ points.

Can we list witch hunting as a form of terrorism against women so we can say this moron’s been palling around with terrorists that she thinks are good guys (crazy Kenyan Pastor)? When do we get to send her back to Neiman’s with her clothes?

Hagar7 November 3, 2008 at 9:19 pm

[re=161340]mattbolt[/re]: I’m with you. Seriously trying to chill on this one because in less than 36h, God willing, that dumb gash and her dead-eyed senile running mate are done. But I’m hard pressed to do it, because I think if the Iditarod Idiot had just two more days, she’d just come out with it and say that Obama himself is a terrorist. She’s edging closer and closer to it, flirting with it, dancing around the edges. She’s killing me.

1ofUS November 3, 2008 at 11:23 pm

You may ask yourself, “How do I work this?” – Talking Heads

“People were born to fart around.” – Kurt Vonnegut.

greensprout November 3, 2008 at 11:53 pm

Did she ACTUALLY just claim to back a vision of America that champions “freedom, tolerance and equality”….??! SPUTTER. This woman better hope to never find herself in the same room as me.

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