WORLD'S GREATEST CAMPAIGN  5:55 pm October 30, 2008

McCain Now Feuding With JOE THE PLUMBER

by Ken Layne

Joe the Plunger!Could they just be competent for maybe one hour of a single day? First, we laughed as McCain called out in vain for his savior of the week, the utterly random showboating jackass “plumber” in Ohio, then we learned this Samuel “Joe the Plumber” Wurzelbacher eventually showed up at a later rally and refused to endorse McCain, and now CNN is reporting that this bald-headed rat-eyed fame-crazed serial liar is publicly feuding with the McCain campaign, using the usual McCain campaign system of internal disputes: Blabbing to the press.

From CNN’s Political Ticker, posted before the guy finally showed up at the second rally:

But reached at his home by CNN’s Mary Snow, Wurzelbacher said it was “news to him” that he was supposed to be at the McCain rally. Wurzelbacher said nobody from the McCain campaign confirmed he was attending the event and called the incident a “miscommunication.”

Wurzelbacher also said he is headed to Philadelphia for a charity event unrelated to the campaign and has no plans to meet up with McCain today.

UPDATE: Contacted by CNN a second time, Wurzelbacher said the campaign only called him to confirm after the event in question already took place. He will now try to meet up with McCain later in the day.

Wurzelbacher also said he had gotten an initial call about coming to the morning rally, “but no one called back to confirm,” and was “not happy” that McCain had called out his name and he wasn’t there.

Let this sink in for a moment. While it’s true that the McCain-Palin campaign is literally about a different thing every few hours, the “Joe the Plumber” obsession has been somewhat regular since the last debate. The McCain campaign website, once a grim Darth Vader-esque testimonial to McCain’s seriousness of purpose and long service in the military and Senate, has been turned into some cheap amateur porn YouTube collection of fat idiots also glory-whoring for a moment in the spotlight. It’s shameful.

And now, the actual “Joe the Plumber” himself is at war with the McCain campaign. He’s got his own event schedule, and will be appearing at some charity event in Philly “unrelated to the campaign.” He is probably campaigning for John Murtha.

Joe the Plumber is “going rogue.”

Joe the No Show [CNN]

 
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{ 103 comments }

The Frogurt Is Also Cursed October 30, 2008 at 5:58 pm

Why is Mr. Clean angry with the California Raisin?

magic titty October 30, 2008 at 6:01 pm

“The McCain campaign website, once a grim Darth Vader-esque testimonial to McCain’s seriousness of purpose and long service in the military and Senate, has been turned into some cheap amateur porn YouTube collection of fat idiots also glory-whoring for a moment in the spotlight. It’s shameful.”

Everyone climb aboard the BangBus!! Refreshments include whiskey, sperm, and regret.
Hollerrrrrr!!

spencer October 30, 2008 at 6:01 pm

They could have just dressed Steve Schmidt up in a pair of Carhartt’s and a flannel shirt and no one would have been able to tell the difference.

StripesAndPlaids October 30, 2008 at 6:01 pm

On the one hand, this is funny as hell. On the other hand, it is really sad. And if by some miracle Walnuts actually wins this thing we will be governed by the most completely fucked up people since, well, since Bush.

Gopherit October 30, 2008 at 6:01 pm

“Charity event” = “cleaning Cindy’s Pipes” He is a plumber after all…..a 4 lug-wrench plumber.

shortsshortsshorts October 30, 2008 at 6:02 pm

The non-campaign related event is a “charity” thing. Joe the Genius will be promoting his new book “How I learrned 2 Scam Yoos.”

user-of-owls October 30, 2008 at 6:04 pm

McCain Campaign Director of Personnel: Col. Walter E. Kurtz.

tremendous October 30, 2008 at 6:04 pm

guys, he has shit to deal with. these toilets don’t unblock themselves amirite?!

Dave J. October 30, 2008 at 6:04 pm

This shit is starting to make FEMA’s Katrina response look like fucking D-Day.

SayItWithWookies October 30, 2008 at 6:04 pm

“I’m sorry Mr. The Plumber, the campaign staff is too busy leaking bitchy CYA exposées to the press to confirm your endorsement of Senator McCain. Can I interest you in a pair of fuzzy moose antlers?”

Rush October 30, 2008 at 6:05 pm

Gimme a “C”
Giime a “L”
Giime a “U”
Giime a “S”
Giime a “T”
Giime a “E”
Gimme a “R”
Gimme a “F”
Giime a “U”
Gimme a “C”
Gimme a “K”

swinger1121 October 30, 2008 at 6:05 pm

OMGZ Joe is plumbing the depths of Cindy’s pill-ridden snatch

cal October 30, 2008 at 6:06 pm

“bald-headed rat-eyed fame-crazed serial liar”

You nailed that one, Ken!

slappypaddy October 30, 2008 at 6:07 pm

“How far down does this hole go?”

All the way to the bottom, Senator.

Gopherit October 30, 2008 at 6:07 pm

[re=156943]Rush[/re]: One problem. They would have spelled it wrong, guaranteed.

Lazy Media October 30, 2008 at 6:07 pm

I don’t remember the Dukakis or Mondale people falling apart like this. Anybody else pay more attention to them than I did?

Gopherit October 30, 2008 at 6:08 pm

Is that a picure of Joe or Gannon? Or are they one and the same? UR. BLOWING. MY. MIND!!

user-of-owls October 30, 2008 at 6:08 pm

Look for the blind quote from a McCain senior staffer tomorrow that goes something like:

“He’s out there operating without any decent restraint, totally beyond the pale of any acceptable human conduct.”

S.Luggo October 30, 2008 at 6:08 pm

It’s clear. CNN is in the toilet tank for Obama.

ManchuCandidate October 30, 2008 at 6:08 pm

Gee, I can’t imagine what a government run by Jamakain would look like.

Everyday in the Jamakain Admin would be a new cartoon strip of Spy vs Spy with double crosses, triple crosses, quadruple crosses and even quintuple crosses. Rogue agents for change. Rogue agents against rogue agents. Rogue agents against change.

Vewol Mevemont October 30, 2008 at 6:09 pm

Hasn’t his line about not having any friends and being unable to get along with anyone been one his selling points? It’s strange, but I think he actually hopes to win by proving that everyone hates him.

tiger October 30, 2008 at 6:09 pm

See, now that Joe is famous and whatnot, he actually needs,say, “confirmations”for luncheons and such…elitist fuck.

cal October 30, 2008 at 6:09 pm

Where is Jeff Gannon on this one?

You’d think he would be all over Joe the Plumber.

And I mean ALL OVER him, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

mocowbell October 30, 2008 at 6:10 pm

Well, it appears we are all MAVERICK Georgian Plumbers now. I just can’t keep track of this anymore…

ManchuCandidate October 30, 2008 at 6:10 pm

In that Pic above, Joe the Plumber looks a lot like this guy:

http://mysite.verizon.net/myk15/busheyesmanhohor.jpg

ivenson October 30, 2008 at 6:11 pm

[re=156930]spencer[/re]: Or send out James Carville and tell everyone it’s JtheP’s skeleton.

WendyK October 30, 2008 at 6:11 pm

That looks like Gannon/Guckert. Well shit. Now it all makes sense.

RubberSoul October 30, 2008 at 6:13 pm

Is this some kind of experiment to see how much they can utterly fail, yet still finish under a 10% margin behind Hopey in the popular vote?

slappypaddy October 30, 2008 at 6:13 pm

[re=156954]Lazy Media[/re]: No one’s campaign has fallen apart like this, ever, anywhere, not even some podunk’s running for dog-catcher. This is one to be telling the grandkids about. It’ll scare the daylights out of them on Halloween.

EnBuenOra October 30, 2008 at 6:14 pm

For Republicans it’s a fun drag show for them to dress up like regular working schmoes and pretend to care about the working classes. It’s sort of like Sadie Hawkins’ day for them.

ManchuCandidate October 30, 2008 at 6:14 pm

[re=156971]WendyK[/re]:
Jizz, um Jinx!

Basye October 30, 2008 at 6:14 pm

Assholes at war with one another is kinda funny.

Lazy Media October 30, 2008 at 6:15 pm

Bob Dole > Jammacain.

JadedDIssonance October 30, 2008 at 6:16 pm

I like how nearly all of the videos on McCain’s site are white. Haha. The black one looks to be a rebelling teen.

springfield_meltdown October 30, 2008 at 6:16 pm

I’m now predicting a CMT dating show in the vein of Flavor of Love for Fameho Joe. And the contestants could be called Drain Skanks. I assume Cindy will sign up once the divorce is final.

Texan Bulldoggette October 30, 2008 at 6:16 pm

Hey, Ken stole my Joe the Plunger line. Can I hire John Edwards to sue for me? I demand justice!!

Itsjustme October 30, 2008 at 6:17 pm

[re=156968]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Second photo is creepy.

heroinmule October 30, 2008 at 6:18 pm

I think he should be Palin’s VP in 2012…from “team of mavericks” to “team of rogues.”

AnnieGetYourFun October 30, 2008 at 6:20 pm

[re=156920]The Frogurt Is Also Cursed[/re]: OMG, thank you. You have made my day.

RubberSoul October 30, 2008 at 6:22 pm

Perhaps Mr. The Plumber finally took a trip over to: http://taxcut.barackobama.com/

JeffGoldblum October 30, 2008 at 6:23 pm

Jeff Gannon IS Joe The Plumber! Genius! The CIA has done it again!

tallyho October 30, 2008 at 6:23 pm

Wait, that’s not Joe the Plumber in that picture.

That’s the gay blogger dude (not that there’s anything wrong with that, The Daily Dish) who got a White House press pass a few years ago. Gannon or something?

Right?

Lazy Media October 30, 2008 at 6:24 pm

Ah, crap, I just realized Jammacain is still a senator. And will be one after he loses, so Cindy can at least go home to Arizona without worrying about his creepy old ass following her there. But Biden will win the vice presidency AND the Senate seat for Delaware, before handing it over to the Dem governor to fill. HA!

problemwithcaring October 30, 2008 at 6:24 pm

From the McCain YouRubes Porn: Karl the Laminator, who worries that Obama would tax his boss and that would result in fewer people being able to afford home renovations.

Riiight, ’cause people NOT being able to afford kitchen laminate has nothing to do with the fact they no longer have places to “house” kitchen countertops?

V572625694 October 30, 2008 at 6:24 pm

McCain’s new site is hysterical. “Duane the entrepreneur” looks like a pimp or a pickpocket. Don’t tax him for working hard.

rocktonsammy October 30, 2008 at 6:27 pm

McShitmypants said today when Joe the Douche Plumber didn’t show for that particular rally that “we are Joe Plumbers”!

Ewe…

tonashideska October 30, 2008 at 6:27 pm

JTP is obviously holding out for Secretary of Labor in the new mccain cabinet.

WadISay October 30, 2008 at 6:27 pm

A little career advice to anyone who works on the McCain campaign: the proverbial gap in your resume would be way better than telling the truth.

pourmecoffee October 30, 2008 at 6:28 pm

Joe is like all plumbers; he will just say “I’ll be there between noon and five.” The campaign will have to deal with it.

spencer October 30, 2008 at 6:31 pm
NoWireHangers October 30, 2008 at 6:31 pm

WALNUTS! sure is good at creating horrible Frankenstein monsters which he cannot control and as a result run amok and destroy everything in their path.

WALNUTS! for President!

american mutt October 30, 2008 at 6:32 pm

I am so looking forward to the movie about these past many months.

facehead October 30, 2008 at 6:33 pm

[re=156955]Gopherit[/re]: Sorry to blow your mind ever harder but:

http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/9606/gannoncensoredfe0.jpg

Lazy Media October 30, 2008 at 6:36 pm

You know what will be the best moment EVER, on Jan. 20, 2009? When the Senate goes into session after the inauguration to confirm Obama’s cabinet nominees, and Walnuts is there.

War Eagle October 30, 2008 at 6:37 pm

Idn’t tha a picture of Jeff Gooker from the White House press core?

american mutt October 30, 2008 at 6:37 pm

[re=157040]facehead[/re]: that requires NSFW

sk1win October 30, 2008 at 6:40 pm

[re=157036]spencer[/re]: You win!

Numbat Dundee October 30, 2008 at 6:40 pm

When Joe’s spent the proceeds of his 15 minutes on six packs and Sarah Palin look-a-like hookers and needs to start plumbing again he could get a job in Australia. He’d love working here in Melbourne where the Plumbers Union was, last time I looked, still led by a bunch of unrepentant pro-Gang of Four Maoists.

ducandy October 30, 2008 at 6:41 pm

I hope SP runs in ’08, Barry will win all fifty.

War Eagle October 30, 2008 at 6:41 pm

[re=157036]spencer[/re]: Those Onions are going to put Nostradamus out of business. That is beyond amazing.

ducandy October 30, 2008 at 6:42 pm

I hope SP runs in ’08, Barry will win all fifty.

OOps, I meant ’12

Scandalabra October 30, 2008 at 6:52 pm

Let’s hope Joe the Plumber is around the next time Sarah’s water breaks

Dashboard_Buddha October 30, 2008 at 6:57 pm

Concerning the picture: Is that Joe the Plumber or Jeff Gannon? I mean, both do a lot of plunging, but damn.

blader October 30, 2008 at 6:58 pm

I hear Hopey has had very similar problems lassoing a dude know as Pete the Professor, who not unlike Plumbers, tend to have a bit of an independent streak and haughtiness about them

answerbird October 30, 2008 at 7:03 pm

If he wasn’t such a prick, I would actually feel sorry for McCain. I used to come accross guys like him all the time when I worked as a public librarian. Old guys that would come in because they drove away all their friends and family. If you were polite to them and they would consider you BFF and you couldn’t get rid of them. I think like Sarah, Joe is a climber. He realized that he milked McCain for all he could get and drop him faster than you could say “Roto-Rooter, that’s the name. And away go troubles down the drain!” Could we see Joe & Sarah team up for a show on Fox? She better looking than Hannity and Joe has bonified working class loser creds. At least they could do is put Walnuts out of his misery and smother him with a pillow when he falls asleep on the bus tonight.

Maus October 30, 2008 at 7:03 pm

[re=156932]Gopherit[/re]: God, SOMEONE fuck Cindy already.

user-of-owls October 30, 2008 at 7:05 pm

HI;);) I DIDNT’ REED ANY BODY’S ELSES’ COMMENTS, BUT I THINK THATS’S A PCTURE OF TEH QUEER GY. LOLL;)l

IonaTrailer October 30, 2008 at 7:09 pm

Just wait – it could get better. In their desperation they’ll begin gnawing off each others limbs.
McCain will call Palin a fucking cunt. Or maybe Joe the Plumber.

mordecaibrown1908 October 30, 2008 at 7:15 pm

[re=156932]Gopherit[/re]: “Cleaning Cindy’s pipes”? I’m not touching that with a 10-inch, er, 10-foot pole.

Speed Ball October 30, 2008 at 7:15 pm

Haha. Hah. Ohhh boy. Wonkette you’ve kept Jeff Gannon out of this presidential election for far too long. JEFF GANNON WE WILL NEVER FORGET YOU.

user-of-owls October 30, 2008 at 7:18 pm

[re=157098]user-of-owls[/re]: [re=157114]Speed Ball[/re]: *sigh*

mordecaibrown1908 October 30, 2008 at 7:18 pm

Joe the Plumber can find work in the “Who’s Nailin’ Paylin” sequel.

nmmagayar October 30, 2008 at 7:18 pm

[re=157106]IonaTrailer[/re]: Calls Joe a cunt, or Joe calls Sarah a cunt – or better yet, Cindy calls all three of the cunts. God I love that word.

Speed Ball October 30, 2008 at 7:22 pm

[re=157119]user-of-owls[/re]: *sigh* you.

If there is something wrong about being fascinated with a soft ball journalist with fake credentials that moonlights as a military pr0n hero, well, I don’t want to be right.

This is an election about teh issues.

Gingah October 30, 2008 at 7:32 pm

[re=157130]Speed Ball[/re]: a-MEN!

The Jackson Five October 30, 2008 at 7:33 pm

Please to never link to Jammakkkains “website” again…now I have to clean the regurgitated hobo beans offa my keyboard. Thanks for that.

FindFuckandFlee October 30, 2008 at 7:36 pm

OMG U USED A PICTURE OF POWDER?

thesycophant October 30, 2008 at 7:37 pm

Okay, how long do we have to wait for the Hollywood-produced comedic farce adaptation of this race? Because we could literally just play it all exactly the way it happened but with a silly oboe soundtrack and it would be the most hilarious comedy of its season.

War Eagle October 30, 2008 at 7:41 pm

Chef Gannon, Joe Wurlitzer, Ashley Toad, Winkin-Blinkin-and-Nodd Palin, Levi’s Johnson…where do the Republics come up with all these silling peoples?

Is that twitchy Repub blonde who didn’t know where to vote still talking about stuff among the newsies?

Ken Layne October 30, 2008 at 7:42 pm

[re=157057]Numbat Dundee[/re]: What are plumbers called in Australia? Poopies? Pipeys? You all have such whimsical names for your tradesmen. Oh jesus, what are carpenters called? Woodies? No, chippies! Agh.

rocktonsammy October 30, 2008 at 7:46 pm

the guy in the picture has a more pointier head, Joe’s head has changed shape since its been up Fox News ass for the last two weeks.

I hope he at least got the back taxes paid by Fox, cheapest whore in history!

NYNYNY October 30, 2008 at 7:50 pm

Oh my God, I think they just might win this thing.

smellyal8r October 30, 2008 at 7:50 pm

[re=156938]tremendous[/re]: Uhhh, Joe’s not licensed to unclog the toilets, remember? He can only accompany the guy who unclogs the toilet. That’s why his business ownership, $250k salary, etc., was “aspirational” to begin with.

Jukesgrrl October 30, 2008 at 8:06 pm

[re=157153]War Eagle[/re]: You forgot Nancy Poopenheifer.

the schmada October 30, 2008 at 8:21 pm

[re=157155]Ken Layne[/re]: Correct you are, chippies and they drive expensive things called utes. They are the new elites down here.

glamourdammerung October 30, 2008 at 8:22 pm

[re=157114]Speed Ball[/re]: If it makes you feel any better, I thought Joe the Make-believe Plumber was Jeff Gannon the first time I saw the picture.

Kwame' October 30, 2008 at 9:20 pm

If that is a Kirlian photograph, Joe’s “aura” is shit-colored, and that can’t be good.

PenguinDreams October 30, 2008 at 9:35 pm

I propose that for the next election we conduct it more like a reality teevee show. Lock all the candidates in a house and have a camera on them 24/7 recording all their gaffes and poo-flinging. Every week there’s a challenge – could be something like recite the Constitution, name all 50 states and their capitals, whatever. Whoever wins gets immunity for that week. Then voters call in and vote one of them out of the house every week.

Last one standing gets to be the leader of the free world. That’s the only way the election process could be any more ridiculous than what we’ve seen this year.

Carrie_Okie October 30, 2008 at 9:47 pm

8000 Wonkers call Sh-GANNONgans.

user-of-owls October 30, 2008 at 9:53 pm

[re=157300]PenguinDreams[/re]: And I would direct you once again (not you, me repeating myself), to Litter Box Democracy.
Who Pooped in the Ballot Box?
http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-128190

shortpockets October 30, 2008 at 9:54 pm

I don’t get it. Why the name WALNUTS?

Strappo October 30, 2008 at 10:30 pm

[re=157040]facehead[/re]: Are you trying to say that Jesus sucks his dick?

Cool.

TexasCowGirl October 30, 2008 at 10:45 pm

Dear Lord, these fuckers can’t do anything right! What’s the matter with WALNUTS! people? He was supposed to get in contact with Joe the Dumber’s people. To be thrown under the bus by this bald headed sucker is just sad.

Weeping Jesus October 30, 2008 at 11:55 pm

I think that dude Levi Johnston is probably fuming about how “Gee, I knock up (allegedly) one of the hot Palin spawn, and some bald guy who looks gay is gettin’ the cred.”

Levi, life isn’t about fairness, my man. Be grateful you have a “special needs” kid.

Ken Layne October 30, 2008 at 11:56 pm

Oh come on, people, of course it’s Jeff Gannon or James Dale Guckert or whatever. We were looking for a picture of this bald Joe Plumber creep and I searched our archives for “bald creep” and sure enough, this pic showed up. Magic.

zetetic October 31, 2008 at 1:17 am

[re=157120]mordecaibrown1908[/re]: “Who’s Naylin’ Palin 2: World’s Deadliest Snatch”

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 31, 2008 at 6:00 am

[re=157392]Ken Layne[/re]: But have you ever seen them both in the same room at the same time?

Ooooh…., Now I need the brain bleach.

dkissam October 31, 2008 at 6:51 am

Wow, now both of the ignoramuses McCain spontaneously elevated to national visibility have flipped him off and are focusing on their own careers. Nice.

TGY October 31, 2008 at 7:39 am

Isn’t there a special tank for plumbers? Maybe that’s the septic.

Toomush Infermashun October 31, 2008 at 8:27 am

So what did they spend on Joe’s wardrobe? Whatever it was, THEY GOT ROBBED!

Another DC Lawyer (Again) October 31, 2008 at 8:50 am

Joe the Plumber=Jeff Gannon. And…ahh…the D.C. Circle of Life continues. Hakuna Mattata biatches.

vthokies383 November 1, 2008 at 4:22 pm

john mccain is a fraud

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGF-HEd6XnA

Czn939 November 4, 2008 at 8:14 pm

“Joe the Plumber” was Jeff Gannon’s porn name.

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