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McCain Now Feuding With JOE THE PLUMBER

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Joe the Plunger!Could they just be competent for maybe one hour of a single day? First, we laughed as McCain called out in vain for his savior of the week, the utterly random showboating jackass “plumber” in Ohio, then we learned this Samuel “Joe the Plumber” Wurzelbacher eventually showed up at a later rally and refused to endorse McCain, and now CNN is reporting that this bald-headed rat-eyed fame-crazed serial liar is publicly feuding with the McCain campaign, using the usual McCain campaign system of internal disputes: Blabbing to the press.

From CNN’s Political Ticker, posted before the guy finally showed up at the second rally:

But reached at his home by CNN’s Mary Snow, Wurzelbacher said it was “news to him” that he was supposed to be at the McCain rally. Wurzelbacher said nobody from the McCain campaign confirmed he was attending the event and called the incident a “miscommunication.”

Wurzelbacher also said he is headed to Philadelphia for a charity event unrelated to the campaign and has no plans to meet up with McCain today.

UPDATE: Contacted by CNN a second time, Wurzelbacher said the campaign only called him to confirm after the event in question already took place. He will now try to meet up with McCain later in the day.

Wurzelbacher also said he had gotten an initial call about coming to the morning rally, “but no one called back to confirm,” and was “not happy” that McCain had called out his name and he wasn’t there.

Let this sink in for a moment. While it’s true that the McCain-Palin campaign is literally about a different thing every few hours, the “Joe the Plumber” obsession has been somewhat regular since the last debate. The McCain campaign website, once a grim Darth Vader-esque testimonial to McCain’s seriousness of purpose and long service in the military and Senate, has been turned into some cheap amateur porn YouTube collection of fat idiots also glory-whoring for a moment in the spotlight. It’s shameful.

And now, the actual “Joe the Plumber” himself is at war with the McCain campaign. He’s got his own event schedule, and will be appearing at some charity event in Philly “unrelated to the campaign.” He is probably campaigning for John Murtha.

Joe the Plumber is “going rogue.”

Joe the No Show [CNN]

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About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • The Frogurt Is Also Cursed

    Why is Mr. Clean angry with the California Raisin?

  • magic titty

    “The McCain campaign website, once a grim Darth Vader-esque testimonial to McCain’s seriousness of purpose and long service in the military and Senate, has been turned into some cheap amateur porn YouTube collection of fat idiots also glory-whoring for a moment in the spotlight. It’s shameful.”

    Everyone climb aboard the BangBus!! Refreshments include whiskey, sperm, and regret.

  • spencer

    They could have just dressed Steve Schmidt up in a pair of Carhartt’s and a flannel shirt and no one would have been able to tell the difference.

  • StripesAndPlaids

    On the one hand, this is funny as hell. On the other hand, it is really sad. And if by some miracle Walnuts actually wins this thing we will be governed by the most completely fucked up people since, well, since Bush.

  • Gopherit

    “Charity event” = “cleaning Cindy’s Pipes” He is a plumber after all…..a 4 lug-wrench plumber.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    The non-campaign related event is a “charity” thing. Joe the Genius will be promoting his new book “How I learrned 2 Scam Yoos.”

  • user-of-owls

    McCain Campaign Director of Personnel: Col. Walter E. Kurtz.

  • tremendous

    guys, he has shit to deal with. these toilets don’t unblock themselves amirite?!

  • Dave J.

    This shit is starting to make FEMA’s Katrina response look like fucking D-Day.

  • SayItWithWookies

    “I’m sorry Mr. The Plumber, the campaign staff is too busy leaking bitchy CYA exposées to the press to confirm your endorsement of Senator McCain. Can I interest you in a pair of fuzzy moose antlers?”

  • Rush

    Gimme a “C”
    Giime a “L”
    Giime a “U”
    Giime a “S”
    Giime a “T”
    Giime a “E”
    Gimme a “R”
    Gimme a “F”
    Giime a “U”
    Gimme a “C”
    Gimme a “K”

  • swinger1121

    OMGZ Joe is plumbing the depths of Cindy’s pill-ridden snatch

  • cal

    “bald-headed rat-eyed fame-crazed serial liar”

    You nailed that one, Ken!

  • slappypaddy

    “How far down does this hole go?”

    All the way to the bottom, Senator.

  • Gopherit

    [re=156943]Rush[/re]: One problem. They would have spelled it wrong, guaranteed.

  • Lazy Media

    I don’t remember the Dukakis or Mondale people falling apart like this. Anybody else pay more attention to them than I did?

  • Gopherit

    Is that a picure of Joe or Gannon? Or are they one and the same? UR. BLOWING. MY. MIND!!

  • user-of-owls

    Look for the blind quote from a McCain senior staffer tomorrow that goes something like:

    “He’s out there operating without any decent restraint, totally beyond the pale of any acceptable human conduct.”

  • S.Luggo

    It’s clear. CNN is in the toilet tank for Obama.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Gee, I can’t imagine what a government run by Jamakain would look like.

    Everyday in the Jamakain Admin would be a new cartoon strip of Spy vs Spy with double crosses, triple crosses, quadruple crosses and even quintuple crosses. Rogue agents for change. Rogue agents against rogue agents. Rogue agents against change.

  • Vewol Mevemont

    Hasn’t his line about not having any friends and being unable to get along with anyone been one his selling points? It’s strange, but I think he actually hopes to win by proving that everyone hates him.

  • tiger

    See, now that Joe is famous and whatnot, he actually needs,say, “confirmations”for luncheons and such…elitist fuck.

  • cal

    Where is Jeff Gannon on this one?

    You’d think he would be all over Joe the Plumber.

    And I mean ALL OVER him, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

  • mocowbell

    Well, it appears we are all MAVERICK Georgian Plumbers now. I just can’t keep track of this anymore…

  • ManchuCandidate

    In that Pic above, Joe the Plumber looks a lot like this guy:

  • ivenson

    [re=156930]spencer[/re]: Or send out James Carville and tell everyone it’s JtheP’s skeleton.

  • WendyK

    That looks like Gannon/Guckert. Well shit. Now it all makes sense.

  • RubberSoul

    Is this some kind of experiment to see how much they can utterly fail, yet still finish under a 10% margin behind Hopey in the popular vote?

  • slappypaddy

    [re=156954]Lazy Media[/re]: No one’s campaign has fallen apart like this, ever, anywhere, not even some podunk’s running for dog-catcher. This is one to be telling the grandkids about. It’ll scare the daylights out of them on Halloween.

  • EnBuenOra

    For Republicans it’s a fun drag show for them to dress up like regular working schmoes and pretend to care about the working classes. It’s sort of like Sadie Hawkins’ day for them.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Jizz, um Jinx!

  • Basye

    Assholes at war with one another is kinda funny.

  • Lazy Media

    Bob Dole > Jammacain.

  • JadedDIssonance

    I like how nearly all of the videos on McCain’s site are white. Haha. The black one looks to be a rebelling teen.

  • springfield_meltdown

    I’m now predicting a CMT dating show in the vein of Flavor of Love for Fameho Joe. And the contestants could be called Drain Skanks. I assume Cindy will sign up once the divorce is final.

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    Hey, Ken stole my Joe the Plunger line. Can I hire John Edwards to sue for me? I demand justice!!

  • Itsjustme

    [re=156968]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Second photo is creepy.

  • heroinmule

    I think he should be Palin’s VP in 2012…from “team of mavericks” to “team of rogues.”

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=156920]The Frogurt Is Also Cursed[/re]: OMG, thank you. You have made my day.

  • RubberSoul

    Perhaps Mr. The Plumber finally took a trip over to:

  • JeffGoldblum

    Jeff Gannon IS Joe The Plumber! Genius! The CIA has done it again!

  • tallyho

    Wait, that’s not Joe the Plumber in that picture.

    That’s the gay blogger dude (not that there’s anything wrong with that, The Daily Dish) who got a White House press pass a few years ago. Gannon or something?


  • Lazy Media

    Ah, crap, I just realized Jammacain is still a senator. And will be one after he loses, so Cindy can at least go home to Arizona without worrying about his creepy old ass following her there. But Biden will win the vice presidency AND the Senate seat for Delaware, before handing it over to the Dem governor to fill. HA!

  • problemwithcaring

    From the McCain YouRubes Porn: Karl the Laminator, who worries that Obama would tax his boss and that would result in fewer people being able to afford home renovations.

    Riiight, ’cause people NOT being able to afford kitchen laminate has nothing to do with the fact they no longer have places to “house” kitchen countertops?

  • V572625694

    McCain’s new site is hysterical. “Duane the entrepreneur” looks like a pimp or a pickpocket. Don’t tax him for working hard.

  • rocktonsammy

    McShitmypants said today when Joe the Douche Plumber didn’t show for that particular rally that “we are Joe Plumbers”!


  • tonashideska

    JTP is obviously holding out for Secretary of Labor in the new mccain cabinet.

  • WadISay

    A little career advice to anyone who works on the McCain campaign: the proverbial gap in your resume would be way better than telling the truth.

  • pourmecoffee

    Joe is like all plumbers; he will just say “I’ll be there between noon and five.” The campaign will have to deal with it.

  • spencer
  • NoWireHangers

    WALNUTS! sure is good at creating horrible Frankenstein monsters which he cannot control and as a result run amok and destroy everything in their path.

    WALNUTS! for President!

  • american mutt

    I am so looking forward to the movie about these past many months.

  • facehead

    [re=156955]Gopherit[/re]: Sorry to blow your mind ever harder but:

  • Lazy Media

    You know what will be the best moment EVER, on Jan. 20, 2009? When the Senate goes into session after the inauguration to confirm Obama’s cabinet nominees, and Walnuts is there.

  • War Eagle

    Idn’t tha a picture of Jeff Gooker from the White House press core?

  • american mutt

    [re=157040]facehead[/re]: that requires NSFW

  • sk1win

    [re=157036]spencer[/re]: You win!

  • Numbat Dundee

    When Joe’s spent the proceeds of his 15 minutes on six packs and Sarah Palin look-a-like hookers and needs to start plumbing again he could get a job in Australia. He’d love working here in Melbourne where the Plumbers Union was, last time I looked, still led by a bunch of unrepentant pro-Gang of Four Maoists.

  • ducandy

    I hope SP runs in ’08, Barry will win all fifty.

  • War Eagle

    [re=157036]spencer[/re]: Those Onions are going to put Nostradamus out of business. That is beyond amazing.

  • ducandy

    I hope SP runs in ’08, Barry will win all fifty.

    OOps, I meant ’12

  • Scandalabra

    Let’s hope Joe the Plumber is around the next time Sarah’s water breaks

  • Dashboard_Buddha

    Concerning the picture: Is that Joe the Plumber or Jeff Gannon? I mean, both do a lot of plunging, but damn.

  • blader

    I hear Hopey has had very similar problems lassoing a dude know as Pete the Professor, who not unlike Plumbers, tend to have a bit of an independent streak and haughtiness about them

  • answerbird

    If he wasn’t such a prick, I would actually feel sorry for McCain. I used to come accross guys like him all the time when I worked as a public librarian. Old guys that would come in because they drove away all their friends and family. If you were polite to them and they would consider you BFF and you couldn’t get rid of them. I think like Sarah, Joe is a climber. He realized that he milked McCain for all he could get and drop him faster than you could say “Roto-Rooter, that’s the name. And away go troubles down the drain!” Could we see Joe & Sarah team up for a show on Fox? She better looking than Hannity and Joe has bonified working class loser creds. At least they could do is put Walnuts out of his misery and smother him with a pillow when he falls asleep on the bus tonight.

  • Maus

    [re=156932]Gopherit[/re]: God, SOMEONE fuck Cindy already.

  • user-of-owls


  • IonaTrailer

    Just wait – it could get better. In their desperation they’ll begin gnawing off each others limbs.
    McCain will call Palin a fucking cunt. Or maybe Joe the Plumber.

  • mordecaibrown1908

    [re=156932]Gopherit[/re]: “Cleaning Cindy’s pipes”? I’m not touching that with a 10-inch, er, 10-foot pole.

  • Speed Ball

    Haha. Hah. Ohhh boy. Wonkette you’ve kept Jeff Gannon out of this presidential election for far too long. JEFF GANNON WE WILL NEVER FORGET YOU.

  • user-of-owls

    [re=157098]user-of-owls[/re]: [re=157114]Speed Ball[/re]: *sigh*

  • mordecaibrown1908

    Joe the Plumber can find work in the “Who’s Nailin’ Paylin” sequel.

  • nmmagayar

    [re=157106]IonaTrailer[/re]: Calls Joe a cunt, or Joe calls Sarah a cunt – or better yet, Cindy calls all three of the cunts. God I love that word.

  • Speed Ball

    [re=157119]user-of-owls[/re]: *sigh* you.

    If there is something wrong about being fascinated with a soft ball journalist with fake credentials that moonlights as a military pr0n hero, well, I don’t want to be right.

    This is an election about teh issues.

  • Gingah

    [re=157130]Speed Ball[/re]: a-MEN!

  • The Jackson Five

    Please to never link to Jammakkkains “website” again…now I have to clean the regurgitated hobo beans offa my keyboard. Thanks for that.

  • FindFuckandFlee


  • thesycophant

    Okay, how long do we have to wait for the Hollywood-produced comedic farce adaptation of this race? Because we could literally just play it all exactly the way it happened but with a silly oboe soundtrack and it would be the most hilarious comedy of its season.

  • War Eagle

    Chef Gannon, Joe Wurlitzer, Ashley Toad, Winkin-Blinkin-and-Nodd Palin, Levi’s Johnson…where do the Republics come up with all these silling peoples?

    Is that twitchy Repub blonde who didn’t know where to vote still talking about stuff among the newsies?

  • Ken Layne

    [re=157057]Numbat Dundee[/re]: What are plumbers called in Australia? Poopies? Pipeys? You all have such whimsical names for your tradesmen. Oh jesus, what are carpenters called? Woodies? No, chippies! Agh.

  • rocktonsammy

    the guy in the picture has a more pointier head, Joe’s head has changed shape since its been up Fox News ass for the last two weeks.

    I hope he at least got the back taxes paid by Fox, cheapest whore in history!


    Oh my God, I think they just might win this thing.

  • smellyal8r

    [re=156938]tremendous[/re]: Uhhh, Joe’s not licensed to unclog the toilets, remember? He can only accompany the guy who unclogs the toilet. That’s why his business ownership, $250k salary, etc., was “aspirational” to begin with.

  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=157153]War Eagle[/re]: You forgot Nancy Poopenheifer.

  • the schmada

    [re=157155]Ken Layne[/re]: Correct you are, chippies and they drive expensive things called utes. They are the new elites down here.

  • glamourdammerung

    [re=157114]Speed Ball[/re]: If it makes you feel any better, I thought Joe the Make-believe Plumber was Jeff Gannon the first time I saw the picture.

  • Kwame&#39

    If that is a Kirlian photograph, Joe’s “aura” is shit-colored, and that can’t be good.

  • PenguinDreams

    I propose that for the next election we conduct it more like a reality teevee show. Lock all the candidates in a house and have a camera on them 24/7 recording all their gaffes and poo-flinging. Every week there’s a challenge – could be something like recite the Constitution, name all 50 states and their capitals, whatever. Whoever wins gets immunity for that week. Then voters call in and vote one of them out of the house every week.

    Last one standing gets to be the leader of the free world. That’s the only way the election process could be any more ridiculous than what we’ve seen this year.

  • Carrie_Okie

    8000 Wonkers call Sh-GANNONgans.

  • user-of-owls

    [re=157300]PenguinDreams[/re]: And I would direct you once again (not you, me repeating myself), to Litter Box Democracy.
    Who Pooped in the Ballot Box?

  • shortpockets

    I don’t get it. Why the name WALNUTS?

  • Strappo

    [re=157040]facehead[/re]: Are you trying to say that Jesus sucks his dick?


  • TexasCowGirl

    Dear Lord, these fuckers can’t do anything right! What’s the matter with WALNUTS! people? He was supposed to get in contact with Joe the Dumber’s people. To be thrown under the bus by this bald headed sucker is just sad.

  • Weeping Jesus

    I think that dude Levi Johnston is probably fuming about how “Gee, I knock up (allegedly) one of the hot Palin spawn, and some bald guy who looks gay is gettin’ the cred.”

    Levi, life isn’t about fairness, my man. Be grateful you have a “special needs” kid.

  • Ken Layne

    Oh come on, people, of course it’s Jeff Gannon or James Dale Guckert or whatever. We were looking for a picture of this bald Joe Plumber creep and I searched our archives for “bald creep” and sure enough, this pic showed up. Magic.

  • zetetic

    [re=157120]mordecaibrown1908[/re]: “Who’s Naylin’ Palin 2: World’s Deadliest Snatch”

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    [re=157392]Ken Layne[/re]: But have you ever seen them both in the same room at the same time?

    Ooooh…., Now I need the brain bleach.

  • dkissam

    Wow, now both of the ignoramuses McCain spontaneously elevated to national visibility have flipped him off and are focusing on their own careers. Nice.

  • TGY

    Isn’t there a special tank for plumbers? Maybe that’s the septic.

  • Toomush Infermashun

    So what did they spend on Joe’s wardrobe? Whatever it was, THEY GOT ROBBED!

  • Another DC Lawyer (Again)

    Joe the Plumber=Jeff Gannon. And…ahh…the D.C. Circle of Life continues. Hakuna Mattata biatches.

  • vthokies383

    john mccain is a fraud

  • Czn939

    “Joe the Plumber” was Jeff Gannon’s porn name.