Wonkette
With every Republican short of Roberta McCain endorsing Barack Obama, it only makes sense that somebody would try to dig up a Democrat voting for McCain (NO LIEBERMAN DOES NOT COUNT). And here it is, your token Democrat Wendy Button, writing in Evelyn Waugh’s Weblog Compendium of Critical Musings about how the Democratic party has abandoned her. She worked for John Edwards — a big fat libtard liberal with fancy ideas about how government should help people, and poor people shouldn’t be poor — and now, after the media made fun of Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton, she will be voting for John McCain, because he has promised not to raise rich people’s taxes. Huh? On a side note, if this gal can get a job writing for three major Democratic presidential candidates, your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel Prize for literature. [The Daily Beast]
I just had a douchegasm.
Well, that’s one.
TED STEVENS FOR PRESIDENT!
If reality television has taught us anything, it’s that there’s always some nut willing to share their opinion on something which they know nothing about.
Where do thry FIND these people? Is there a D.C. warehouse called “Dr. Turncoats Irrational Staffers Emporium”?
your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel prize for literature.
They don’t give it to Americans any more. Just another way you can tell we’re fucked.
I read the first page of the screed and, seriously, this person writes for a living?
Jesus Christ.
Sounds like someone is bitter that Johnny boy would rather do that crazy blonde Rielle than her. How sad for Wendy that Walnuts won’t ever do the sexy times with her, either.
SO if I read between the lines correctly, Edwards was tapping Buttons at the same time he was having babies with everyone else who was female and working on his campaign and now she’s going to get her revenge by voting for a guy who stands no chance of winning? OK.
…can someone please tell me what is the political advantage to openly endorsing a losing campaign. This is the equivalent of a passenger of the Titanic speaking of how unsinkable the ship is, as it breaks in half and sinks below the waves!
FMA: seems she’s as much a writer as joe was a plumber (or well, joe, for that matter)
I guess Edwards didn’t fuck her well enough.
CivicHoliday: Best Thing EVAH, this story. She’s freakin’ TRYING to get a JOB with the GOP! She’s dumb and can’t write, but she knows this much…there’s gonna be bloodletting in the GOP.
She’s gonna get a six figure salary from them ’cause she’s a female “Democrat”..
Funniest thing ever. This is a sly whoring out.
“I Haz Vage, Me Rant.”
Sorry. I can only speak for myself. The problem was never Hilsbot or Sarah’s lady bits. The problem was that Hilsbot was the wrong person to be Demrat leader and Sarah P for being an utter dumbshit phony and a dominionist loony.
If Wendy Button (if that really is her name) is the genius who deployed the term “son of a millworker”, this is good news for Obama.
Someone, please remove one item from the tank.
Why doesn’t Lieberman count? Because he’s a virgin?
Okay, I just read the entire pointless article. First: I want those 5 minutes of my life back, dammit. Second: she has the temerity to call the unrelenting criticism of “Joe the Not-a-Licensed Plumber” and Sarah the functional moran patronizing? Come the FUCK on. Ugh, Wendy, sack up and quit crying your poor baby “nobody loves me anymore boo hoo hoo” tears.
Hey, is that a picture of Edwards’ love baby?
another pissed-off Hilltard! Don’t let the door hit you in you cooch on the way out.
Evelyn, if you love Palin so much, move to Alaska. Perfect for frigid women like you.
Your work is more widely read than that of Jean-Marie Le Clezio.
the horror.
“See [sic] campaigns get complicated when you’ve written for so many Democrats.”
Hairy Reed: Ken Layne has two foreign passports in his desk drawer. One is German, the other Israeli, which explains the self-loathing and homicidal tendencies.
This woman is a bitter with a capital “B.” The party has little or nothing to do with it. She’s not really voting for McGrumpy so much as voting against people who apparently decided not to continue her employment. Sucks to be a loser. Tough noogies. And good luck in the unemployment line.
“I didn’t hear from anyone for three weeks.”
Sob! This drivel reads like a teenager’s tear-stained diary entry. Girl should be a blogger, and write about how dissappointed she is in men generally.
FMA: I had to re-read the bit about Biden and her dad and I think I finally figured out what the hell she was trying to say but I still ain’t sure!
Rush: She jumped the tank!
queeraselvis v 2.0: Exactly how I read it. Says a helluva lot more about Whiney Wendy than the Dems OR GOP.
“if this gal can get a job writing for three major Democratic presidential candidates, your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel prize for literature”
You seem….bitter….Sara
We’ve all learned Edward’s shenanigans in the last few months…I’m inclined to think also that those linked with Edwards should not be trusted as far as they can be thrown either.
The question is this: who’s in remission this time?
http://plightofthepumpernickel.blogspot.com
cal: She’s got a head start ’cause it’s just like a repug to blame everyone else and not take responsibility for themselves…You go Wendy girl!
“your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel prize for literature.”
There was never a doubt in my mind.
cal: Or an indie folk songstress with initials on her face.
Perhaps the democratic party left her because she couldn’t write her way out of a christing paper bag. The bit about Biden having sex with her Dad or something and all the other stuff the Democrats used to do for her is completely impossible to understand.
Republicans will make good use of her basic illiteracy.
Min: They were up for it until an army of copy editors put down the cats from their laps and sent off perfectly correct notes of protest to the committeeeeeeeeeeeeeee (can you spot the typo, editors?)
Another broken heart, loved by JEdwards and cast aside — no job in a future millworker administration, no little poofy-haired love child souvenir, duh-nada.
She has this thing for men named John or called “Johns” or something.
It makes sense that Edwards’ “straight banging crazy chicks, yo” policy would translate to supporting Walnuts. She simply cannot trust Obama and his “lifelong monogamy with a supportive partner” stance.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Yes, but that B is backwards.
When former Senator John Edwards read it, he laughed and said, “That makes you like my parent.” He went on to say, “Would you please come down to Chapel Hill so we can talk about what’s coming up.”
OMG I am so stealing that line.
Nice of you to put a picture of John Edwards’ love child in the headline. He’s got his father’s hair.
Christ, what a stupid fucking bitch.
“…and the patronizing, “I’ve got nothing but love for Joe the Plumber.””
Yep, it is so patronizing to say you love someone. Obama should have spoken the truth: “I’ve got nothing but gay baby abortions for Joe the Plumber.”
WadISay: Yeah, this “son of a mill worker” bit is clunky and reeks of inauthenticity to anyone who’s ever lived in a mill town. It’s millrat, not “mill worker,” ditzbrain.
If John E had been properly branded “son of a millrat” teh bitters would have been crying in their shot and a beer over him, not Hillary.
They are probably scribbling a contract for her as fast as possible over at Fox News.
And no would you ever get a Nobel for literature, Sara. You are not an ancient Turkish writer that no one has ever fucking heard of.
Tommy Says Soooo: Which is which?
Dave J.: So she’s essentially pissed that Barry won’t put out, whereas JRE would at least put out for five minutes in the stairwell at a rally.
I’m also voting for McCain because Obama didn’t kiss my ass enough. Where does this guy get off not puckering up and smooching away? Doesn’t he realize this election is all about me?
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
Perhaps if Miss Wendy Wahwah had a better grasp of the English language she would not have such a difficult time procuring gainful employment. Although, considering the Republican party’s history of mangling those silly words she might have a bright future ahead of her.
“I didn’t leave the Democratic Party; the Democratic Party left me.”
I have to say, this part is true. The Democratic Party is actually going to win this time, and she’s voting for a loser.
Well, Tina Brown promised us a Daily Beast, and by God, a beast we got. Write? This woman can’t even fucking punctuate!
4tehlulz: Angry at the mill worker roleplay didn’t happen
that*
I was reading a huffington post and thought id share this.
Maria Gold, a Russian immigrant, is poor. She was unable to give money to John McCain’s campaign, but believes he is the best person to be the next president of the United States. “I’m not surprised people in Brighton Beach support McCain more,” she said. “It’s because we’re smart.”
Frankly, I’m happy this nice lady is willing to keep the old man company!
A tour de force of comedic self-pity. A journalistic Ashley Todd! Yay!
I wonder if she’s gotten her Starter Republican Kit yet?
I hear it contains things like red meat, family values, a flagpin, a noose, The Ann Coulter catalogue, and utter contempt and intolerence for anyone who disagrees with her.
Riddle me this my fellow Wonketters, because I don’t need to start drinking by noon.
How are the swing states continuously favoring Barry, while the national numbers are allegedly tightening?
Between TPM, 538, FoxNews, and Drudge, I can’t tell whether to masturbate with hope or fear.
Thanks.
Hairy Reed: I kid Ken Layne. He has to deal with Sara’s withering envy of his World’s Best Boss coffee mug.
I guess she’s “Joe, the writer.”
My heart bleeds for phony “plumbers.”
And phony “writers” too.
Worlds End: Ken Layne has a passport for her when Hopey wins.
Buttons: “When I saw Edwards at a traffic light in D.C. about a year after our meeting, he asked for help and I did and it was an honor to help him with his concession speech.” WTF? She helped him write his speech at a traffic light? This is writing????!!!!11FTW??
magic titty: This won’t help you in the slightest, but the basic reason is that state polls lag the national polls by several days.
“Not only has this party belittled working people in this campaign, it has also been part of tearing down two female candidates.”
Because, see, normally you want to build up your opponents. I must admit she’s run rings round me logically. I now have no choice but to kill myself via auto-erotic asphyxiation while fapping it to a video loop of Palin winking.
“will switch parties for job”
Sara: Why you always gotta be dissin’ on Evelyn Waugh?
Dave J.: Oh good god. But thanks for the insight.
“When we first met, Obama and I had a nice conversation about speeches and writing, and at the end of the meeting I handed him a pocket-sized bottle of Grey Poupon mustard so he wouldn’t have to ask staff if it was okay to put it on his hamburger.”
WUT?
Tommy Says Soooo: Seems Russian immigrants are also poor according to the article.
magic titty: I’m not entirely sure, so masturbate with hope not fear i guess?
magic titty: I feel you on that. “blue dildo, or red dildo?”
magic titty: In addition to Dave J’s reply, you need to see the breakouts on population, too. McCain can lead by forty points in Texas, that doesn’t matter.
What you need to look at via 538.com is lead in battlegrounds for EVs, so if Hopey is over 50% say in PA/VA/NC/FL, Macacacain is toast.
Hopey is not going to win by a Pew 54-38 or whatever….Nate McLovin at 538 is probably close enough to popular vote. Maybe 53-47 with EV blowout unless Chimpy invades Secaucus.
she does say this though
“Our economy is in the tank”
see, even the economy knows hopey knows best!
I can’t believe somebody is actually jumping out of the tank?
magic titty:
Instead of jacking it with “hope” or “fear”, I’ve read a tablespoon of mayo usually does the trick.
Drudge is trying to pimp us all. No love for the haterz.
tremendous: I saw that too, but immediately dismissed it after I read the follow-up sentence, “(H)e snapped, “So you read People magazine too” and the ensuing rumination over his swimsuit pic. Talk about an endless loop of non sequiturs.
magic titty: However, for some good news, see this: Hot off the presses PA poll has O +13. That squares with two or three other recent PA polls.
WHY were some people glad that Tina Brown started her own website–so they could read a bunch of meandering, self-pitying nonsense like this? (Shameful as Miz Button’s writing is, it’s not much worse than most of the rest of the daily crap at The Beast.)
Come to ponder, you know who else used to be a Democratic speechwriter? Charles Krauthammer. (For Walter Mondale, whatever the h. that’s worth.) So our Miz Button here may have a splendid future after all.
I’ve been staring at a blank comments box for twelve minutes trying to find the words to properly reflect how not good she writes. I’m stuck. She just plain blows.
magic titty: With hope. Obama is so far ahead atm that he can give California and New York to McCain and still win.
Christ. That’s about the most shallow, self-serving column I’ve ever read.
Maybe Barney Frank should pay her a visit and be extra nice to her.
She would’ve made more money going to the Enquirer with her story of “Sex in the Campaign.”
Who is this woman? Has anyone actually ever heard of her before? I’ve written more coherent stuff than this under anesthesia.
Damn, has she already taken a speech writing job for Palin? Me write guuud one day.
“When we first met, Obama and I had a nice conversation about speeches and writing, and at the end of the meeting I handed him a pocket-sized bottle of Grey Poupon mustard so he wouldn’t have to ask staff if it was okay to put it on his hamburger. At the bottom of the bottle was the logo for “The South Beach Diet” and he snapped, “Oh so you read People magazine.” He seemed to think that I was commenting on his bathing suit picture.”
The only way this paragraph makes any sense is if it is actually code. Grey Poupon is “fiery death”; Hamburger is “Alabama Black Snake”; South Beach Diet is “Tora! Tora! Tora!” and bathing suit means “heimlich maneuver.”
I think she just had a change of heart because she’s on the rag. When Hopey wins she’ll want cabinet.
anyone watching obama?
I wonder if Bill O’Reilly is going to rave on about how this is a race-motivated thing.
azw88: dude. “frigid”? what year are you in?
anyway, on the article itself, she writes: But here we are about a week out and it’s déjà vu all over again. Really, front-page news is how the Republican National Committee paid for Governor Sarah Palin’s wardrobe? Where’s the op-ed about how Obama tucks in his shirt when he plays basketball or how Senator Biden buttons the top button on his golf shirt?
does she really not see the difference? While there have been plenty of jokes about Palin’s fashion sense, $150,000 of a faltering campaign on a wardrobe and makeup, with the makeup artist making more than what one would think are more relevant staffers - that kind of waste is newsworthy.
Button is in the tank for obtuseness.
Whoever made that Zoolander gif of the Dems posted a couple of days ago deserves a MacArthur Genius Grant. Maybe if Ms. Button saw it, it would make her smile and realize that she let things get to her a bit too much.
“Might as well look pretty when I am unemployed in a city swimming with “D’s.””
WHO ARE THESE D’s in Washington? Does it stand for District? Does it stand for Dementia? Does it stand for…. terrorists?
So, did Obama end up putting the Grey Poupon on his burger after consulting with his staff?
I couldn’t get past the second paragraph. Wendy Button’s personal journey from democratic speech writing true believer to desperate, right-wing, ultra religious reactionary couldn’t interest me less. The tank doesn’t need her. Go work for “Focus on the Family” you asshole.
Tommy Says Soooo: Thanks. That is more to my analysis. That McCain could be stomping Barry in some of the bitterz states, which might offset a “national trend”.
Yes, the peeps at 538 keep me tumescent yet grounded, all at once. It would be extraordinarily difficult for McGramps to win the EV, but I don’t even want the popular vote to be close.
I hates me some Drudge, but for some reason, he seems to be able to move the national dialogue to his liking.
Deepthroat: I’m a boy person, so…both!
Anyway, the pollster scribes in Nevada say lazy youngsters who claim to want to vote Hopey have yet to show up and press a button and shit. WTF?
Dear diary,
DEMICRATS SUXXORS! (wipes away single tear of righteous, irrational “female” rage) THEY H8 WIMMENS!!
Buttons/Fiorina 2012
So who pissed in her cheerios?
Free tip for potential Nobel Prize winners: try to refrain from referring to it as the fucking Nobel Prize.
magic titty: Sorry for the downer but there are MILLIONS of voters that have had their votes disallowed or challenged. This is happening everywhere. The election CAN be stolen.
Google her: Wendy Button received her MFA in fiction from Bennington College, and her short story “Climbers” appeared in Scribner’s Best of the Fiction Workshops. She lives in Boston and has worked as head speechwriter for Mayor Tom Menino. (5/2002)
Did this woman really write speeches for these candidates? What is the proof? She does not quote any of them. Also, her writing stinks.
Was this woman even a Democrat? She does not seem to know what the party stands for, more or less. The differences are stark. How could she so easily switch sides?
Why is she so thin-skinned?
Nothing about this makes sense.
Atypical: I can imagine. Fuucking hell. You have any article links?
Wendy, still pining for her lost boy Johnnny Ed, has long piece in HuffPo about the departure of Edwards as a voice for the poor and the working class.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/wendy-button/not-about-governor-sarah_b_127168.html
Remind me again why Miss Working-Class-Heroine is voting for McMoneyBucks and not Ralph? Her piece in The Breast is pure Weltenschaung. Weep.
shortsshortsshorts: “Might as well look pretty when I am unemployed in a city swimming with “D’s.””
I think she was drunk and listening to Jacque Brel when she wrote that line.
I think that’s what our old-school political theorists called “unenlightened self-disinterest.”
P.S. If I hit my thumb with a hammer, my new interjection is “SON of a fucking MILLWORKER!”
magic titty: Read anything by Greg Palast plus Mark is all over this problem.
http://www.markcrispinmiller.blogspot.com/
From HuffPo, “it’s unclear I’ll want to write another political speech again.”
We could wish. Obama and the party didn’t leave you, they sacked your sorry ass.
Dear Ms. Button,
Sorry you got fired. Haha!
Love,
Barry
“. . .your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel Prize for literature.”
Why does Sweden hate America?
sezme: I couldn’t disagree more. I love it when Sara K. Smith hits us with the potty mouth. The Noble committee can go fuck themselves.
Also a pulitzer for integrity and awesomeness in journalism.
Well, this certainly does make one pine for the good old days when Boot was writing for The
Beast. I love how she suggests that the 150,000 on clothes would never be talked about if it were a man involved. Hello? Is she really trying to get us to believe she was with the Edwards campaign?
$400 haircuts, anyone?
“. . .your Wonkette editors should get the fucking Nobel Prize”
There’s a Nobel prize for that, too? Another thing to feel inadequate about….
O.K., I read that alleged speech writer’s post (got curious from your damn witty comments) – all I can say is WOW – someone paid her to write. Her reasons are moronic – complaining about sexism and running to the man who called his wife a “cunt” and laughed when a woman asked him “how do we beat the bitch.”
I was only able to get through about two paragraphs of this gal’s articles. Even by the low standards of the internet, where everyone can pretty much post whatever they want, this never should’ve seen the light of day. Being to the left of Obama, I have always wondered why I couldn’t get more enthusiastic about John Edwards. I think I now know the answer.
What horrible writing. I would call that article a steaming hunk of shit, but it’s way too boring.
dano: And I’m not disagreeing with you at all. We all love SKS. I’m just saying.
Shit we’re not allowed to tuck in shirts or button top buttons anymore? What’s my boss going to say?
shortsshortsshorts: Of course it stands for “terrorist” — why do you hate America?
a) what a whiny self-entitled small-minded pointless waste of time that Wendy Button person is. ooh, John Edwards blew me off and Obama didn’t like my dumb little flirty gifts. ergo, Democrats suck. q.e.d.
and b) why do the euphemisms for the Daily Beast our editors are using seem like they come from a McSweeney’s list or a really bad steampunk novel?
The mustard yarn left me completely baffled. I don’t understand that at all. I didn’t read to the very end because I suspected the whole thing was going to consist of mystifying anecdotes.
I cannot make teh funniez but I make the ha-ha’s every day with Wonk People.
i’m glad u guys are covering this. WTF is this wendybuttons? Sounds like a Walmart clothing line. Oh, actually, it’s a handbag line:
http://www.wendybuttons.com/
Following in Ms. Lewinsky’s footsteps, hmmm.
I was so irritated last nite reading that bathroom wall scrawl of a piece — Daily Beast is right… Why they gave her such a prominent soapbox is beyond me — there were no online mentions of her before this piece, no evidence she had any kind of real standing in the party or the O campaign. If she ever had any writing chops, she must have gone off her meds or something since then.
But she’s def. a better fit for Team Bullmoose now. Her confounding blather would fit the Palin brand perfectly — “Obama rears his head, flyin’ over our Real America glass ceiling, it’s all about jobs - um, jobs for me - so grey poupon government out of our way, media filter!”
wheelie: For real. I mean, there was some gibberish about Grey Poupon and South Beach Diets and then I was like, “hunnggh?”
Not only was that horribly written, it was without discernable point or entertainment value. What the fuck was that woman on? And the only photo of her with a political figure is her frantically waving in Edwards’ face while he tries desperately to pretend she’s not there. So I don’t know. This lady might be a “speech writer” like I’m a “novelist.”