october surprise

Barack Obama Again Dances In Slightly Embarrassed Manner On ‘Ellen’

Remember how Barack Obama went on Ellen that one time, and then his wife went on, and then yesterday he went on again and proved through his dancing that he is indeed half white? Well, here is the new footage. Also: midway through we see a photograph of a young Obama in a pirate costume (for Halloween, a pagan holiday), an image which spontaneously impregnated thousands of American women with tiny pirate-babies. [YouTube]

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Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith

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43 comments

  1. Serolf Divad

    Let it hereby be acknowledged: Barack Obama is Ellen’s dancing poodle. All that’s missing is the tu tu.

  2. NoWireHangers

    Can I just say that I love Sasha Obama. Really love the girl. She seems so cute and sneaky and mischievous. She’s going to be the best first daughter ever! Corpse Bride? Hell yes!

  3. NoWireHangers

    You can see Barry holding in the moves. In his head he’s like, “Must dance like Lawrence Welk. Must not scare whitey. Must not drop it like it is hot”.

  4. NoWireHangers

    Interesting fact: Oprah can’t dance either. Someone should conduct a study on non-threatening black people and their lack of rhythm.

  5. mattbolt

    John McCain was a great dancer in his time! He once fell 8000 feet onto a pile of jagged rocks. But people were tougher in those times. He was jitterbuggin’ that very night!

  6. NoWireHangers

    This reminds me how badly I want to see WALNUTS! and Cindz take a twirl on the dance floor. I bet Cindy was a total disco queen with the tight pants and cocaine to prove it. It looks like her hair would feather well. Sigh.

  7. NoWireHangers

    [re=144853]NoWireHangers[/re]: Although, now that I think of it, Will Smith might thwart my theory.

  8. Christastic

    [re=144859]fuckinredneck[/re]: “I wish I could dance, but I was a prisoner in the Nam for five and-a-half years!!!”

  9. mattbolt

    I’d put Obama as a 2 on the blackness scale
    10 – Notorious BIG
    9
    8 – Samuel L Jackson
    7
    6 – Kobe Bryant
    5
    4 – Will Smith
    3
    2.5 – Eminem
    2 – Barack Obama
    1
    0 – Bryant Gumble

  10. fuckinredneck

    [re=144872]Christastic[/re]: I love the Obamas so much. They are superlatively charming people.

    I think I’m becoming a true believer in physiognomy. Compare and contrast the Obamas and their kids with the walking McCorpses and the Palins. I know who I’m votin for!

  11. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=144885]mattbolt[/re]: Where’s Michael Jackson or is he in another category of “black men who literally turned white”?

  12. TGY

    OK. Dork-in-Chief. Whatevs. We should cut him some slack for being under pressure and all. It’s hard to get your Groove on as I well know. Also, he’s in Florida. How the hell can you get your Groove on in Florida for the love of Plastic Jesus?

  13. problemwithcaring

    [re=144885]mattbolt[/re]: Please – Kobe Bryant speaks Italian and didn’t really get black ’til he caught a rape case in Colorado. Barack’s alcoholic daddy abandoned him and his pregant mama, plus he married a girl from the ‘hood. He is clearly a 6 or 7. Didn’t you get the updated “Who’s Black Now?” diagram in last month’s Jet?

  14. Paterlanger

    [re=144885]mattbolt[/re]: Would you mind breaking down the science behind your “scale” for us? Obama falls in between Gumbel and Eminem? At Zero is Gumbel so not black that he’s white or is he not white but not black (enough for you)? What about Eminem? Is black despite his whiteness, like essentially black beneath his superficial whiteness or are you giving him style points for being so convincingly black (enough for you) for a white guy? And how exactly do you measure folks for this scale? I mean, on Barry’s behalf let me just ask “what’s a brother got to do to be black enough for mattbolt?” And another question: In a Palin/Romney administration would mattbolt accept an appointment as Secretary of Defense Against Miscegeny?

  15. problemwithcaring

    [re=145008]Paterlanger[/re]: Hey, I was tryin to illustrate the innate stupidity of judging someone blackness. My apologies if I wasn’t stupid enough for you!

  16. mattbolt

    [re=145002]Paterlanger[/re]: Dude, it’s wonkette, nothing’s serious, everything’s sarcastic, etc.

Comments are closed.