Wonkette
Robocalls, everyone’s talking about ‘em, these devilish angerbots that keep calling swing state voters and saying mean things about candidates. This one made us laugh out loud for the sole reason that it’s from Rudy Giuliani, and he says, among other things: “You need to know that Barack Obama opposes mandatory prison sentences for sex offenders, drug dealers and murderers. It’s true, I read Barack Obama’s words myself.” Since when can Rudy Giuluani read words? Ha ha, GOOD GOD. Can you imagine answering your phone only to hear this failed stupid fucking idiot say crap about anyone, based on what he “read himself”? Stop spitting on us, phone. [Jonathan Martin]
Barack Obama doesn’t want to execute sex offenders? Like, say, if you piss on the side of the street and a cop sees you, you won’t get any jail time? What the fuck, this MUSLIN SUMBITCH has gone too far!!1!>!!
Haha - I just posted this on the powder time 9/11’s post.
Also, fuck you Rudolph.
He mention anything in that robocall about announcing the separation from his first wife via a press conference she was not attending?
Cocksucker.
“9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11″
“Barack Obama wants to kill you, and rape your children. He wants to pull your corpse to the back of your house and then feed on you while having gay sex with a transvestite, who he will then marry.”
“9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11″
I feel like it would have been perfect if Giuliani had inserted the words “suffering succotash” at some point.
Sorry guys,
I can’t laugh. This shit’s dangerous. I remember returning to college in Fall of 1988 and seeing friends who were all for Dukakis at the beginning of the summer saying there was no way they’d vote for him because he was “pro-bestiality”. Look up how the Bush campaign and their allies threw every peice of slime, mostly lies, at Dukakis in the final weeks. I guess they figured people would believe at least one of the accusations and change their vote.
Yeah, I got one of these this morning (Colorado). I hung up immediately, because I’m trying to win some sweepstakes here, Rudy you shitball!
My favorite soundbyte: “prithon thententhes, thex offenderth.”
Rudy’s mother really should have sent him to speech class when he was in elementary school. That lisp makes me want to put my head in an oven.
“You need to know that Rudy Giuliani is a cross-dressing putz. It’s true. I’ve seen the pictures myself.”
Who’s this Parak Ophama?
And why does he hate America?
Dear God. It’s amazing the kind of lies which are being flung around this campaign season.
It is true, however, that while Sarah Palin was Mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, her administration made women pay for their rape kits after they had been sexually assaulted.
Let’s see some robo-calls of that nature.
http://plightofthepumpernickel.blogspot.com
Liverspots: I think his RNC speech was the first time I really ever heard Rudy speak for an extended period of time and I was astonished that Republicans did not mock that gay-ass lisp.
How weird, redneck hate speech with a New York accent…
” Hello, this is Rudy Giuliani and I’d like to tell you something about Barack Obama. He’s really Willie Horton and if elected he’ll rape and murder your daughter’s and wives. In my case my three consecutive wives.”
Join 9iu1ian1 to stop the murdererthsthsthsths! Wow, I listened to that and the spit still got on me!
I can’t think of a better mayor for Wasilla after Palin’s term is over.
AND HE’S A COMMUNITY ORGANIZER!!!!!!! WHO DOES DRUGS!!!! Look out Grandma, the black man and all his pardoned black liberal criminals are coming to steal your shit!
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
Wow. I thought nerds only made cool “girl robots”. What kind of self-respecting nerd would make a “Rudy Giuliani” robot whose purpose was to make lispy phone calls to unsuspecting strangers? This proves that we are on the verge of apocalypse.
What are “liberal zhuzhes”?
Rudy really needs to double down on the Sea Bond.
Death penalty for dumb as fuck ex-mayors. I guess that would include Sarah.
“Im Rudy Giuliani, and you need to know that Barack Obama does not support mandatory jail sentences for Republican Congressman and Judges”
Finally, a return to real Liberalism, where the only goals are to put criminals in the street to rape the white women and to surrender our country to the communist.
Shame the music is going to suck, but the movies should be good. W.I.N.!
I look forward to the Giuliani robocall where he says Obama is a thothalithst
Zombie Lee Atwater strikes again!
I’m pretty sure they had to dispose of the microphone after that recording because of the corrosion.
Oh, Rudy. “Tough on crime” is the Republican message from twenty years ago. Now it’s “tough on socialism”. Get it right.
apparently the 2008 republican strategy is the ‘NY accent strategy’.
I dont agree with mandatory sentencing either. It takes discretion out of the hands of judges. MORON
Obama should just put out robo calls to all the Bubbas saying, “Mandatory sentences for sex offenders would include those convicted of statutory rape.”
The only difference between Rudy and a Sex Offender? Lipstick.
I’m Rudy Giuliani, and I’m calling to let you know that Barack Obama opposes the shoving of broom handles up the anuses of suspects. I know, I asked him to do it himself and he refused me. Bitch.
This shit is actually scary, like nyhfrog said.
The walnuts campaign said they were saving their “best stuff” for the last ten days. I suppose we’re just about there, and that this is the kind of shit we’re going to get.
This is why this election for me is a referendum on honesty and integrity vs. lies and cynicism.
But if anyone was cut out to respond, it’s Hopey. C’mon Hopey…please pull out that amazing can of slime-a-way and start spraying…
So THAT’S the voice you hear when you dial 911.
You know, on a sublime wingnut level this does work. After all, if the cross dressing, gay loving, New York guy is telling you that Obama is a commie, he should know.
bluebrazos: The notion that McCain is saving his “best stuff” until the end is pure bullshit. If they had the goods on Obama they would sure as hell be using it right now before they hit sub 40%.
*spit, spit* I’m Rudy Giuliani *cough* 9/11 *cough* and I approve this message *spit*
Does anyone actually ever listen to robo calls past the “This is xxx with an important message about xxx” part? And why in the hell would you?
The one good thing about robo calls, vs. live telemarketers, is that I don’t feel rude for just hanging up.
user-of-owls: Ohhh…. oh win. Yes. WIN.
Serolf Divad: DAMNIT! I was going there….You Wonkateers are too fast for my slow ass.
As this election season progresses, I’m beginning to rethink the merits of a McCain cabinet. Patrick, Lugar, Sebelius, Hagel, Powell? Boring as hell.
Give me Romney, Huckabee, Giuliani and Good Queen Overloard Palin to top it off. That’s like the cast of the greatest sitcom, evah.
Terror threat level raised to ‘colored’.
bluebrazos: “We’ve got him right where we want him!!!”
The RNC ought to use the phone number 666-911-3569.
Robocalls? Pleh. Isn’t everybody screening their calls for collection agencies anyways?
Sussemilch: Well done.
shortsshortsshorts: You forgot “while having gay sex with a transvestite using the Soviet flag as a blanket”
Someone needs to repeatedly call the RNC with that recording over and over…
You know that wasn’t Rudy. He didn’t say “9/11″ once. Shenanigans!
I’m thinking about getting robot legs…
I remember an episode from the tv series Tour of Duty in which a 15 year old boy who had lied about his age to join the army (it sure wasn’t Bush or Cheney), went to a bar/brothel for some R&R with guys in his unit, got pissing drunk and slipped and fell of the roof of the brothel, breaking his neck.
How do you explain to a relative that their loved one fell off the roof of a brothel in a foreign country and broke his fucking neck?
This perfectly describes the eight long years of the Bush administration.
Giuliani has some nerve. Cross dressing, nine one one victim devouring moron.
Florida is still Rudy’s firewall. Laugh now, but when Rudy snags those sunshine-drenched EVs and the election goes to the House, it’s anyone’s ball game.
Tested. Ready. Then.
Curiously omitted from the robocall was a warning that socialist, anti-American Obama will require every household to adopt a dreaded, face-biting ferret or, as the Rudester has called them, “disease-ridden weasels”. http://www.slate.com/id/2165879/
You can’t fool me, Wonkette. Everyone knows that was Daffy Duck, who is in the tank for McCain. (mine, Mine, MINE!) Thufferin’ Thukkotath.
anyone else notice the last two numbers of the phone number were 9,1. he musta gone into convulsions not being able to get out that extra 1. douche.
How classy of him! http://tinyurl.com/5s5njt
You ever think about it, you’ll be plumb skeered. You laugh at like manhood-enhancing herbals and Nigerian gold and now Ghoulyanny robocalls, but then you worry, there must be buyers for this crap, and they’re out there on the road, maybe heading to an intersection near you right now!
Gorillionaire: Actually I kinda wanted to hear one of those robo calls but it WAS a collection agency.
I hate when judges decide to put people in jail or not put them in jail. What are we even paying them for?
In NJ and the region, already Ghouliani is only a faintly-remembered, bad-tasting political belch. There may be a market for his spittled spiel, but it’s only as big as his vote totals, which warn’t much.
Guishuliani: a cheap Republican political whore. When all is shed and done, the Reeps will flush’em down the shame shithole of shilence with Palin.