NAPTIME FOR GRAMPY  9:18 am October 22, 2008

John McCain Couldn’t Agree More With Western Pennsylvania Hater John Murtha

by Sara K. Smith

This is like when somebody says “you can’t underestimate the importance of thing X” when they are trying to suggest that in fact you can’t overestimate the importance of that thing, it is so very important. Only this is worse times a million, because John McCain says in two different ways that his proud Western Pennsylvanian supporters are racist rednecks. (The crowd, to their credit, gives a collective “Whaaa?”) Then he makes up for it by saying, twice, that the region is so very patriotic. FETCH THIS GENTLEMAN A PILLOW AND A GLASS OF WARM MILK. [YouTube]

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MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend October 22, 2008 at 9:20 am

You can almost hear the theme from Looney Tunes.

jbd October 22, 2008 at 9:21 am

Truth to power, Walnuts. Truth to power.

ph7 October 22, 2008 at 9:22 am

Do you think Cindy ever has sex dreams where she’s the First Lady, but she is undressing for her husband and Commander In Chief BARACK?

Carrie_Okie October 22, 2008 at 9:23 am

A Reagan moment to be sure.

PoliticalGraffiti October 22, 2008 at 9:23 am

that fat white kid in the red hat pretty much epitomizes western pennsylvania

Q2 October 22, 2008 at 9:23 am

Obama. Ha! The drug addict! The wounded soldier snubber! The celebrity! The terrorist! The whitey hater! The Muslim! The liberal! The wealth redistributor! The Socialist! The Marxist! The Communist! The anti-American! The election stealer!

What’d I leave out?

Terry October 22, 2008 at 9:24 am


Undressing for her husband? How many years do you think it’s been since she’s done THAT? Girlfriend lives out west and McCain lives in DC.

askwhipple October 22, 2008 at 9:25 am

Patriotic and God-luvin…I couldn’t disagree any less…

Darehead October 22, 2008 at 9:27 am

In paraphrase: “I couldn’t disagree more than to agree with you that I disagree in agreement that Pennsylvania is the most [and here's the best part] FU@%..patriotic part of the country…”

I think he was about to say the F-word — anyone agree?

Serolf Divad October 22, 2008 at 9:27 am

This is totally unfair… the guy’s like 102 years old and senile and was probably wetting his Depends when he said that. You shouldn’t laugh at old people like that. One day you too will be 102 years old standing outside your Ziggarut giving a speech while running for president of UR of Chaldea and totally get confused about whether you are supposed to hate of like your supporters.

WadISay October 22, 2008 at 9:29 am

Cindy is signing facial reactions, for the emotion-impaired.

ManchuCandidate October 22, 2008 at 9:30 am

Is it just me or has Cindy gotten scarier as the campaign has gone on? She was attractive in a brittle WASPY kind of way. With her new wavy ‘do, she’s looking like a scarecrow.

Harmless October 22, 2008 at 9:31 am

John McCain knows what it’s like to be trapped in a statement for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS!

loquaciousmusic October 22, 2008 at 9:31 am

Is that Shelly Malkin standing behind him in the video still?

(Not the fat white guy.)

queeraselvis v 2.0 October 22, 2008 at 9:31 am

To gloss on the late Ann Richards, “Poor John. He can’t help it. He was born with a silver boot up his ass.”

nurple October 22, 2008 at 9:31 am

When I’m 102, I will have a sexy robot nurse.

ForTheTurnstiles October 22, 2008 at 9:32 am

Cindy must have a belly full of percosets to keep a straight face going here.

Mr Blifil October 22, 2008 at 9:33 am

It’s an honest disagreement if you can’t agree where disagreement about agreeing to disagree might be disagreeable to some, especially when patriotism and God-lovingness are being considered within the patriotic, God-loving framework of agreement over what constitutes patriotic God-loving behavior. I thing we can all agree on that point, if only to be agreeably agreeable. Maybe you disagree.

Seriously, how do you go through such an elaborate set-up only to fuck up the joke that badly? This is the wit that dazzled the US press corps? Do any of these motherfuckers EVER get laid? Because their entertainment threshold seems to be set on “retard.”

Giant Robot October 22, 2008 at 9:34 am

He’s obviously no match for Putin.

Vewol Mevemont October 22, 2008 at 9:34 am

Who put this partially chewed food in my mouth?

Giant Robot October 22, 2008 at 9:36 am

I thought the commies programmed him to fuck things up AFTER he got elected. WTF

Darehead October 22, 2008 at 9:36 am

[re=142689]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: She’s on vacation. That’s an android stand-in.

worrierqueen October 22, 2008 at 9:38 am

What time is he expected back at the retirement village? There’s custard tonight.

Special Agent Jack Mehoff October 22, 2008 at 9:38 am

[re=142675]Q2[/re]: You left out a comment about this McCain video, for starters.

DoctorCulturae October 22, 2008 at 9:41 am

[re=142679]Darehead[/re]: Agreed. He’s more vulnerable, less guarded, distracted. Was he going for “‘effing’ patriotic?” Likely!

Also, Ms. Cindy’s face is the true sign of what is going on with their campaign. Check out the thumbnail. It is as though someone has photoshopped a masculine face on a body with a red dress and blonde doo.

irisheyes October 22, 2008 at 9:43 am

I could not disagree more with our editors for posting this video clip. Their agreement with the Senator who is disagreeing with the Obama supporters as to the patriotism and God lovingness of Western Pennsylvania, is obvious and I agree wholeheartedly with them.

Dientes October 22, 2008 at 9:44 am

Walnuts! hates the Amish.

kapish October 22, 2008 at 9:46 am

The only way younz in Da Burgh can redeem your reputation anat is by voting for Barry.

Tarheel October 22, 2008 at 9:46 am

They put Cindy so close behind him so whenever he glitches up like that she can hit his back until he starts functioning properly again. If you don’t get him on track quickly enough, you have to take out his cartridge and blow on it before reinserting.

/not a dick joke.

The Church of Realism October 22, 2008 at 9:46 am

The best part was the confusion of the audience when they were uncertain about clapping and cheering for being called racist bastards by McCan’t….oops fergot my hood dagnabit.

The Church of Realism October 22, 2008 at 9:48 am

[re=142686]loquaciousmusic[/re]: Can’t be, she doesn’t show up in film or reflect in mirrors…

grendel October 22, 2008 at 9:48 am

That Joe Biden is a gaffe a minute… wait… this was who? Oh, jeebus…

WadISay October 22, 2008 at 9:48 am

Only 13 more days and John McCain can begin the campaign to restore his dignity.

Spackle Camshaft Palin October 22, 2008 at 9:50 am

It’s true. Every Obama supporter I know just spends a;; their time talking about how they love God more than western PA does. It’s starting to get on my nerves, really.

PengIn October 22, 2008 at 9:50 am

Does patriotic mean alcoholic? If so, he’s nailed it.

fupduk October 22, 2008 at 9:52 am

[re=142684]ManchuCandidate[/re]: she’s boosting her vicodin with 30mg oxies these days

Giant Robot October 22, 2008 at 9:53 am

[re=142690]Mr Blifil[/re]: Seriously, how do you go through such an elaborate set-up only to fuck up the joke that badly? Easy. You just spend years of your life saying things that are totally illogical to pander to people that you don’t even like that much. This ensures that your speech will be filled with Freudian slips and embarrassing brain farts like, “My wife is a cunt.” and “I agree that you are a racist supporter of my racist campaign.”

grendel October 22, 2008 at 9:56 am

[re=142695]Giant Robot[/re]: Programming breaks down after 30 years or so

Makeithurt October 22, 2008 at 9:57 am

Free Cindy! She wants brunch. She wants her afternoon facial. She misses Miguel the pool boy and his talented hands. She missed Bryant Park. Free Cindy! Those Vicodin aren’t going to eat themselves. Free Cindy!

ForTheTurnstiles October 22, 2008 at 9:59 am

[re=142726]Giant Robot[/re]: I do wish someone would bring up that “agents of intolerance” video and smack it around some.

Sussemilch October 22, 2008 at 9:59 am

My opponent says I’m a crusty curmudgeon with the brain of a starfish and I COULDN’T AGREE MORE!

TGY October 22, 2008 at 10:00 am

[re=142684]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Poor Cindy, if she’s not high to the eyeballs, she should be.

This is like when somebody says “you can’t underestimate the importance of thing X” when they are trying to suggest that in fact you can’t overestimate the importance of that thing

You confuse me. Are you trying to say that you can misoverestimate the importance of a thing?

bearbait October 22, 2008 at 10:01 am

I could care less.

ForTheTurnstiles October 22, 2008 at 10:01 am

[re=142732]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: Here’s something close.

TGY October 22, 2008 at 10:02 am

Also, the woman to the left of him has the sublimity of hotness. I bet she’s a paid cheerleader, as she doesn’t fit the requirements to go to a McCain rally.

Hairy Reed October 22, 2008 at 10:03 am

[re=142688]nurple[/re]: I hope you’re not referring to Cindy?

Borat October 22, 2008 at 10:08 am

Why does anyone standing in a photo with Walnuts immediately look crazy and a bit stupid?

I’d like to see those people in separate photos to study if Walnuts has some kind of crazyness/stupidity magnifying effect. (And if the same subjects are standing next to Caribou Barbie how does this impact the effect?)

I smell a great PhD thesis for you students out there…

BobLoblawLawBlog October 22, 2008 at 10:12 am

[re=142684]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Nope, not just you. I think Meghan’s been sucking the fat out of her.

HuskyMescan October 22, 2008 at 10:13 am

That night was a Vicodine double-dose night, my friendos.

el_chupacabra October 22, 2008 at 10:14 am

and i would like to add that San Dimas High School Football Rules!

Servo October 22, 2008 at 10:14 am

Hey, Pittsburgh! McCorpse hates the Steelers, Palin hates the Penguins, and Cindy wants to buy out PBC and close it’s doors. Remember, Repubs think the sons and daughters of steelworkers are dirt, like their parents.

BobLoblawLawBlog October 22, 2008 at 10:19 am

Ben Smith has an excerpt from he Draper piece:

You’re welcome.

HuskyMescan October 22, 2008 at 10:21 am

[re=142739]TGY[/re]: Of course, that was the first thing I noticed. The second thing was that she has brown skin and nipples (my favorite). Yeah, she’s a plant.

run_said_ran October 22, 2008 at 10:29 am


Just a shot in the dark here .. but uh:

The fact that Obama is in fact the antithesis of your inane babbling;
The President of the UNITED States; and
Uh … any relevancy your slander has in respect to your Overlord’s lurve of rabid racists?
Call me!

Servo October 22, 2008 at 10:36 am

Looks like your comment was slightly misread.

The Church of Realism October 22, 2008 at 10:37 am

[re=142758]el_chupacabra[/re]: Mr. McCain, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

Min October 22, 2008 at 10:42 am

[re=142684]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I was thinking the same thing. And I don’t think she looks very healthy. Granted, she may just be sick of this campaign…

Kingbee October 22, 2008 at 10:42 am

I couldn’t agree more with disagreeing with agreeing to patriotic god-loving oh god get me out of this W. Pennsylvania hell-hole.

Servo October 22, 2008 at 10:51 am

She’s a Pitt med student patiently waiting for a tissue sample.

bmannes October 22, 2008 at 10:52 am

Paging Dr. Freud.


PineyWoodster October 22, 2008 at 10:55 am

Who’s the young brown chick on the left side of the pic?

I’d hit that.

Q2 October 22, 2008 at 10:56 am

[re=142784]run_said_ran[/re] wrote “call me.”

OK. Misread. I call you a Moran.

WagTehGod October 22, 2008 at 10:57 am

[re=142695]Giant Robot[/re]: It’s the witches’ curses at work …

NoWireHangers October 22, 2008 at 11:08 am

Oh, that WALNUTS!

NoWireHangers October 22, 2008 at 11:10 am

I also love how easy it is to trick mouth breathers as long as you’re a Republican:

“I hate you all!”
“Erm, I mean I hate you and my opponent hates–”
“I mean that I hate that I love you so much!”
“I mean that, my friends.”

Cookie Guggelman October 22, 2008 at 11:11 am

Walnuts Johnson is right!

iolanthe October 22, 2008 at 11:33 am

[re=142689]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: It’s not just Percoset, although I’m sure she’s tossing ‘em back. If I had to campaign like this poor bitch does, *I’D* be snarfing down las drogas like William S. Burroughs.

Damn. Watch it with the sound off. Cindy looks tired and sad and angry. Quietly seething. She hates John McCain, she hates all these odoriferous stupid rednecks, and she *really* hates the fact that she’s put up with this assbag and his shitty temper for all these years, and *she’s not even going to get to be First Lady* ’cause he fucked it up.

Way up.

Oh, to be a fly on the wall in the McCain household on November 5th.

Vewol Mevemont October 22, 2008 at 11:33 am

[re=142784]run_said_ran[/re]: Was that performance art, or did you really not get his post?

iolanthe October 22, 2008 at 11:35 am

The cute Asian/South Sea Islander chick is a *lot* more animated about John and his speech than Cindy is.

I’m guessing that was the one cute girl at the entire rally, which is why they put her up on the podium.

fuckinredneck October 22, 2008 at 11:36 am

Walnuts’ sekret in-ear transmitter is on the fritz! DAMN YOU, MOTOROLA! DAAAMNNNN YOUUUU!!!

Miller October 22, 2008 at 11:41 am

The funny thing is, that Murtha was perhaps underselling his home turf. Washington county, which is south of Pittsburgh, has just one of the highest concentration of Klan members in the US today. Its an exceedingly racist place and Murtha ought to know, he represents some of them.

Gopherit October 22, 2008 at 11:55 am

Freud is a bitch, isn’t he Grampy?

Dave J. October 22, 2008 at 12:12 pm

So Senator McCain, are you saying that Western Pennsylvania is more patriotic than your home state of Arizona?? Hmmmmm?

Cindy claps at the end the way an asshole baseball dad claps for his kid after he fouls of a pitch after whiffing on the first 12.

Citizen Kang October 22, 2008 at 12:22 pm


Are you kidding? When their anniversary comes up Cindy takes two Percoset and washes it down with some Thorazine. By the time citizen/sailor McCain is done, Cindy is still in the middle of her plantation dreams with teh swarthy coloredz. In John’s defense, he’s thinking about Palin the entire time. Todd Palin…he is a Republican after all.

huffybike October 22, 2008 at 12:30 pm

Takes some doing to make your own supporters at your own rally boo YOU:

Itsjustme October 22, 2008 at 12:37 pm

[re=142739]TGY[/re]: I was thinking she was the reason for his gaffe. Flashbacks and everything.

OzoneTom October 22, 2008 at 12:39 pm

[re=142913]iolanthe[/re]: Maybe she’s the Senator’s new “niece”…

Scarab October 22, 2008 at 1:29 pm

“Spider… I thought you said, I’m OK Spider… no, I thought you said I was OK Spider.”

Scarab October 22, 2008 at 1:42 pm

[re=142837]Cookie Guggelman[/re]: LOL

run_said_ran October 22, 2008 at 1:45 pm


Obviously. I’ll take the moniker of moran today.

run_said_ran October 22, 2008 at 1:52 pm

[re=142902]Vewol Mevemont[/re]:

I really didn’t get it the first time about. Lesson learned: Do not attempt patronization without your first cuppa.

I pretty much went off the intent to curtail silly Repug smears. I can’t be blamed entirely people, I watched a Palin rally on YouTube before fleeing to Wonkette. Thus, moranik behavior.


whatever_dc October 22, 2008 at 1:56 pm

can’t you just hear david letterman saying: HUHHH???

iolanthe October 22, 2008 at 1:56 pm

[re=143046]OzoneTom[/re]: or perhaps the pretty brown girl is the replacement, from Central Casting, for that woefully non-photogenic Bangladeshi daughter …

Man, I wonder what stories that poor Bangladeshi kid is going to tell us in the years to come.

Maybe Cindy’s Dad will buy her off, like they all bought off Carol Shepp McCain.

Local Moran October 22, 2008 at 1:58 pm



Mo MoDo October 22, 2008 at 3:16 pm

Cindy is nodding her head like Ed McMahon about to laugh at one of Johnny’s jokes.

timeless October 22, 2008 at 3:39 pm

Even after watching all of Palin’s interviews, that was painful to watch. Way to choke, McCain.

warreno October 22, 2008 at 5:53 pm

[re=142672]ph7[/re]: Actually, those are my dreams.

teebob2000 October 22, 2008 at 9:48 pm

I know it’s stupid, but I keep watching this clip over and over and over again, laughing my fool ass off.

Sid Kitty October 23, 2008 at 10:35 pm

Laughed so hard I almost wet myself first time I saw it!!! This has gotta be the juiciest McCain blooper to date. Look closely and you can almost cacth a look of horror in Cindy’s eye despite she’s had so much botox she is incapable of any facial expression. It’s so f*cking funny it’s almost painful to watch.

worrierqueen October 23, 2008 at 11:09 pm

[re=142833]NoWireHangers[/re]: absolutely brilliant. Sums up all their (soon to be torchlit) rallies. Sarah’s God help us all.

palmerdawg October 27, 2008 at 7:13 am

Cindy’s 5 pounds above organ failure, jeezs somebody, anybody get her a sandwich PLEASE!

palmerdawg October 27, 2008 at 7:18 am

I would tap that sexy repug’s ass, you know, the one behind McNutz……… no god, not Cindy. Yeah that brown sugar.

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