Wonkette
Be sure to check your liberal New York Times Magazine this week, as star reporter Robert Draper has put together “an explosive story… on the inner workings and combative personalities of what has been a wild few months for the McCain campaign,” according to the Huffington Post’s Sam Stein. You can read his preview here, but be warned, that Sam Stein is a major tease! He says there are all sorts of “juicy nuggets,” so presumably he’s read an advance copy and is being mean and won’t share. BOOOOO! We want the story NOW. Who at the New York Times can leak this? Hmm… oh, ha, obviously Bill Kristol can leak it! Everyone seriously e-mail Bill Kristol immediately, subject line, “E-MAIL ME THE BIG MCCAIN STORY RIGHT NOW, SWINE” and nothing else. It’ll work. Go. NOW. [HuffPo]
Ok, I actually did send Kristol an email with that subject line. Felt good, actually.
Did those cunts make McCain wear faggy sweaters again? He hates that.
He’s being very WALNUTS! in that photo. They must read Wonkette.
an explosive story… on the inner workings
do i have a dirty mind, or…?
I can’t send Kristol and email that doesn’t have the subject line of:
“DIE FUCKIN’ ASSBAG!!!!!111″
But I am pretty sure that it sez to do that in the Bible.
Campaigns are challenging enough externally, but internally if you have the wrong dynamics they are a disaster. Conflicting personalities and egos, while uncomfortable in normal working situations, are killers in a campaign because of the close quarters and intense time pressures and deadlines. It seems that the McCain campaign is suffering from a weak ticket, warring egomaniacs under him, and an opponent that is just made of win.
Okay, I’ll let you know what happens when he gets back to me. I’ll probably be sending you an update from teh jayle
Plus, he is just soooooooo fucking OLLLLLLLLLLD
“Hero/Commander/Patriot” — where the hell is “drooling, incoherent, flashback-prone, Viagra-addicted sagging houseplant?”
If the NYT is gonna throw shit at the wall it better stick. It better not be another one of those fucking lobbyists stories that backfires. However, “the campaign is falling apart and everyone hates each other” stories are usually always good.
It sounds like it has the making of a circle jerk
Carrie_Okie: I’m with you, though mine would have to be something “How’s Sarah the Human Colostomy Bag working out for you, huh, HUH?”
Kristol just replied to me with a ”
“
The RNC increasingly reminds one of the German Army at Stalingrad. We can win if the breakthrough comes and the weather holds and the airforce doubles the food drops and the Russians don’t attack and…
“Juicy nuggets” sounds positively X-rated.
At this point, I think they’re making campaign decisions based on locking the disagreeing senior advisors in Thunderdome. Whomever emerges is allowed to set policy for the next 24-hour news cycle.
We should demand video.
MrAgro: Don’t be disappointed — that’s the most sensible and factually accurate thing he’s said in years.
SayItWithWookies: Win.
I thought the whole problem with Walnuts’ campaign was that he had multiple personalities. There’s Gloria, who says things like, “Actually, every single thing I have ever said is true. He’s black. he’s black, and you can’t make him not be black. I have never lied as long as I have been alive.”
There’s Celeste, “He was palling around with the hippie whatnot terrorist guy in Chicago, where they all hate America. Hate America. Listen to me! I’m the candidate!”
And then there’s John, “My fellow prisoners…”
I have a lot of things on my plate right now, and I can definitely wait to read this… and yet I did exactly what you suggested. Weird.
I hope there’s a good cat fight between Cindy and Sarah in there somewhere.
Well, that didn’t work.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: If that were true, I think they’d realize that “we don’t need another heeeero,” which would put a stop on the “I’m a POW/American Hero — look at me,” rubbish.
If Bloomberg had actually been picked (he wouldn’t have accepted), this thing would be totally over now. NO FUCKING WAY the majority of asshat repubs would have tolerated a quasi-liberal Jew on the ticket. That’s why I don’t believe it; the real McCain is as cynical as he appears today.
And I meant “cynical”, not “skeptical”.
I was more interested in Jon Stewarts response to Sarah Palin about the ‘real America’: “Fuck you.”
“Fuck you.”
Another nugget: The downward trend in the McCain campaign started with Steve Schmidt’s abandoment of animal sacrifice in favor of ritual self-mutilation. But who knew?
William L. Kristol, deputy purchasing manager and mailroom superintendant at the New York Times, does not appreciate the joke.
TGY: That completely made my day.
Dammit - that felt good. Until my bitch hotmail postmaster spit it back in my face with an “I’m not delivering this to no one, loser” message. What gives?!?!
“but be warned, that Sam Stein is a major tease! He says there are all sorts of “juicy nuggets,”
Where are those nuggets? Depends…
By the way, I’m going to go ahead and guess what this whole scheme will spawn:
The liberal left is also crazy
Bill Kristol
October 22, 2008
While the media elite, of which I’m emphatically not a part, complained of the racial slurs and death threats documented in Palin ralies, I witnessed another type of hatred. Wonkette, which is an arm of the Obama campaign, rallied its commenters to call me “swine.” Yes, “swine.” When will Obama stop this madness — this throwback to 60s radicalism? And what about Travis Childers? He said nothing. NOTHING!
I say this because I find clear moral equivalence between a site devoted to tongue-and-cheek political humor and a crowd of wingnuts literally on the verge of violence. I have absolutely no regrets in my complacence towards — no, vigorous support of — a Republican strategy explicitly designed to divide the country, discredit higher eduction, and smear intellectualism. When the base hoists me upon its pitchforks on account of my education and ‘otherness,’ I will gladly proclaim “my team has won!,” even as the vicious, provincial party I have cynically created defies everything I believe in, and destroys everything that makes this country great. Ha, ha, just kidding. I have no capacity for self reflection. But those liberals are crazy! Swine, they said! Swine!
SayItWithWookies: Bah! you stole my comment… or something like it. I was also thinking “Gila monster.”
WTF!? Where’s the profanities, chair throwing, door slamming, and hair pulling? I want some Celebrity Deathmatch on The Straight Talk Express here! *Ding-ding*
liberaltruthsayer– It has come to my attention that your post does not contain any shit aimed at Bill Kristol. Please get with the program. We can’t have a few n’er-do-wells ruining it for the rest of us.
I predict that in the next two weeks, McCain will start whining about how his advisers made him pick Sarah Palin instead of letting him pick his first choice, Joe Lieberman.
“It’s not my fault, damn it!”
He still has no clue about the real reason she was foisted upon him.
The graf on Steve Schmidt’s emotional state before he got greased up to go fight Rick Davis in the terrordrome is one for the ages. Real print out and frame material.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
Success has a thousand fathers but failure is an orphan. Nobody wants to claim credit for the Titanic failure that is Juan Macaca’s bid. The fingerpointing will all be over who picked Sarah Plain for this gig. I’m sure they all high-fived each other when she gave them a temporary bump, but now they’re bitch-slapping each other for the campaign’s downhill slalom since the populace became acquainted with this bimbette.
It’ll be Hillary Clinton, redux: one long agonizing cage match between retards with egos bigger than brains. There was only one smart man in the Macaca campaign: Mark McKinnon, who resigned rather than be remembered for sliming Hopey, which is the only footnote to history that douchenozzles like Steve Schitt and Prick Davis will leave behind them.
Life so rarely turns out this fair. Savour the flavour.
Ahhhh, My only moment of peace will be when I have for certain learned that “assnoodle” Rick Davis had something to do with the Straight Talk Express losing the final 3 wheels. Please let this be true.
Vewol Mevemont: Kudos.
pdiddycornchips: I have enough godawful imagery swirling around my brain from this election season, plus I’m jet-lagged. Please don’t ever again put “nuggets” and “Depends” next to one another in any sentence referencing John McCain.
Robert Draper? Any relation to Don Draper?
McCain probably invited the staff from Hillary’s primary run and caught whatever critters they left in his bed.
Jim Newell’s wish is my command. I hope Kristol’s email box explodes.
Vewol Mevemont: Point, game, set and match, despite your notable failure to include to include the illustrative words of Seneca, Horace, Pliny the Elder, Pliny the Younger, Pinky, Milton Friedman, Master Flash or Professor Irwin Corey.
Bill Kristol says he is not part of the “media elite.” Did he start making a living by mowing lawns and being an apprentice plumber for Joe? So that is not his beagle face we keep seeing on foxnews and his words that continue to get published by that magazine rag? He has been wrong almost across the board, every step of the way, during this election cycle. I’m not interested in a washed up old hack.
Girl fight.
Cool.
Done - I’m sure Krys will shoot it right to me.
Well crap:
This is an automatically generated Delivery Status Notification
Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:
wkristol@weeklystandard.com
Did they turn it off already?
And the evolution of McCain’s camp into Hillary’s is complete. Someplace Mark Penn is smiling through a powdered sugar mustache, secure in the knowledge that someone has at long last equaled his total incompetence as a campaign manager.
McCain’s nuggets haven’t been juicy since…oh forget it…