Sarah Palin Goes On Insane Nickname Spree

The CNN.com earned its pay this morning with this bewildered opening salvo about a Sarah Palin rally: "GRAND JUNCTION, Colorado (CNN) — Taking 'Joe the plumber' wordplay to an unprecedented new level, Sarah Palin on Monday..." Yes. Sarah Palin escalated her "verbiage" to new vistas of pain by giving a cute nickname to every worker in this godforsaken country, as well as Barack Obama, who has never had a job beyond gang organizing.

The nicknames included:

• "Tito the Builder,"for Colombian-born construction worker Tito Munoz. Palin: "Tito explained that he’s an immigrant from Colombia and he also had this reminder for us. He says, quote, 'Everything is possible in America. I made it.'" Enjoy it now, Tito the Builder, because if the Republicans win this thing, Sarah Palin is going to deport the SHIT out of you and call you smelly within the first 100 hours in office. Even if Tito is aware of this, he surely considers it a fair risk to take when compared to the dire alternative: that people who make hundreds of thousands of dollars will see their federal income tax rate rise from 36% to 39%. And according to Jesus, "Socialism" kicks in once that number cracks 37%. If it's 36% then our economic system is still safely "America."

• "Phil the Bricklayer."Phil lays bricks all day. If some day he made $250,000 a year and couldn't hire several people full-time because black Obama had taken another $8,000 of his taxes -- a full year's salary for at least 20 people, shared! -- then... oh right, a bricklayer will in fact never make $250,000 a year.

• "Rose the Teacher."Palin said that Rose the Teacher, along with Phil the Bricklayer, "can expect to have their 'dreams dashed by the Obama tax increase.'" Completely erased! Suppose Rose had a "good teaching year" and started getting paid $250,000 a year to teach fourth graders basic arithmetic. This happens almost all the time. Well, under the Obama tax plan, the $8,000 extra Rose would pay in taxes would prevent her from buying the public school at which she teaches. Now what kind of presidentdoesthat? Of course, the liberal MSM gotcha media would never say anythingbadabout "The One."

• "Barack the Wealth Spender."This is Barack Obama's fake full time job, Sarah Palin said: "So all these Joe the plumbers in the house, it doesn’t sound like you are supporting Barack the Wealth Spender in this elections." That's all he does, he finds "wealth" in your plumber's toolbox and then "spends" it on, uh... tax cuts for middle class professionals such as plumbers. Fucking commie.

 Palin dubs Obama: 'Barack the Wealth Spender' [CNN Political Ticker]