Wonkette
Good gravy, this is the saddest act of “vandalism” we have ever seen. Some loser took a few printouts of paranoid AOL commenter-style talking points (big demerits for not using ALL CAPS, though, nut!) and carefully taped them to the windows of an Obama supporter’s minivan. This is how people brawl over politics in Silicon Valley, or what we call “America’s Canada.” Another photo after the jump.
Thanks to commenter Bay Area Blue for sending in these photos of the tender, fuzzy white underbelly of Silicon Valley wingnuttery.
Spell check takes all the romance out of the crazy people flyers
Actually, I just need a babysitter for this weekend. Can I sign up to be a socialist just on the days my husband and I want to get away from the kids?
“an Obama supporter’s minivan.”
I think you just defined the ESSENCE of TREASON!
My yard sign, after being town down several weeks ago (I put it back up, slightly tattered), ended up in about 6 pieces this Sunday morning. And, honestly, I think that is a better thought-out and communicated argument than the sheet above.
And - where is “obsessed with celebrity” and “susceptible to marketing”? The fundies and freeps aren’t even trying any more.
I’m disappointed that it’s just black text on white paper. With the free clip art that’s available, this flyer could have been a work of ART.
Again with the singular terrorist.
Hey ya’ll, the good news is that the hatin’ white bitterz are having plenty problems of their own:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/21/us/politics/21whites.html?hp
“There’s a real problem,” Mr. White said in the interview last month, “in what’s called the ‘white movement.’ One, there’s a lot of people who are just mentally ill, and we deal with those a lot. No. 2, there are people who have serious sexual problems.”
In PowerPoint no less.
OK, this is sort of off topic (it relates to idiots, so sort of on topic). Just peruse some of the comments after this post. I could only read a few before I got too disgusted. Barry’s visiting his grandmother is apparently a political move, and he called her a racist, so he hates her!
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/the-trail/2008/10/20/obama_leaving_trail_thursday_t.html?hpid=topnews
You’d think socialism was a bad thing.
I think they forgot one:
8. You are a Secrit Muslin
my obama yard sign got stolen last night too. i’m ordering 10 today, so i can keep replacing them til Nov 4….
The “Terrorist” sans the “s” is back! One more time and it’s a trend.
Cripes, this is the second time some wingnut failed in the proper spelling of the plural for “terrorist.” Is this sorta like W compulsively referring to the “Democrat Party”? Is bad grammar how we show our patriotism now?
Bonus points also withheld for lack of MSM-style spelling (”U h8 America,” etc.).
I thought Layne lived in a hollowed out cactus in the desert.
im suprised they didnt mention in there somewhere about having a full librul govt. On another point all together , i always want what somebody else earned, normally i have to steal it but if the librul govt will just give it to me thats tits. less work for me and no more old ladies getting their snatches pursed!
>>Bailouts (not for you)
Apparently everyone in Silicon Valley is an investment banker.
Terry:
Cars in a Baptist church parking lot are tempting targets for photos of black lesbians kissing, beneath a crucifix, and wrapped in an American flag.
I blame AutoCorrect for converting the all-caps text into something that looks like English. In real America, we have no MS Word.
ha…and when they had a chance to use all CAPS they passed!!! (ACORN not Acorn) It’s an acronym people! It’s ok to use CAPS!!!!
Apparently fuckwit doesn’t know the Chinese Communists not only supply his local Wal-mart with improvised sex toys but have financed his every Republican wet dream since Bush took over. Ingrate.
nobody ever died being a socialist, right?
tennessee Jed clampett: The yard sign dilemma has been an issue. There aren’t nearly enough signs here in western Wisconsin for all the people who are *actively* seeking to put one in their yard, yet there are a glut of McCain signs and not enough yards to put them in. You drive down the street here and about two-thirds of the yards have no signs, a few have Obama signs, and about one yard every couple miles has 23 signs in it. To make matters worse, the kids know we’re all uptight jerks about who we’re rooting for, so at 2am they sneak out and move all the signs. Damn pumpkin-smashing hooligans.
Actually I think the maker of this sign did a very nice job! Look at the correct spelling, full sentences, and attention to punctuation. See the proper use of numbers and spacing. True there are some problems with logic. And it could be a less-than-accurate copying from the fax talking points, but all-in-all I say a good beginning effort! Time for milk and cookies!
tennessee Jed clampett: Nah, just go volunteer. You’ll come across another yard sign if you’re in a campaign office enough.
tennessee Jed clampett: You are so in the tank for the oldest ghetto trick. Secret Nation of Islam muslins took mine in the middle of the night…I had just happened to be up getting a drink of water when I spotted the fezzes running away with it. I heard giggles and “Dumbass honkey be gonna git the brother mo’ money for his neighbors to be hating on him.”
Neilist: I saw a McCain sticker this morning on the back of a Prius and now I am going to be confused for the rest of the day.
Racist? I’m sure that word means what they think it means. Surely they meant to type “ageist.”
My license plate is OBAMA, front and back. No problems, almost 11 months. People pass the car, point, take pictures with their cell phones.
“Facts don’t matter”
In other news, Irony, laid to rest over two years ago, is now spinning so fast in its grave that the torque is producing visible effects on the rotation of the Earth…
live in Tucson, and I saw a guy come out of his house and rip his McCain-Palin sign out of his yard yesterday. Nothing these haters can say will take that special moment from me.
Very creative choice of fonts for those slides!!
And where did this guy get a copy of Palin’s speech?
JamesMichaelCurley: That’s cuz you live in Russia.
It need a musical accompaniment, like that brand of death metal where the band wore spikes and the audience hurled meat and dead critters. ROAR!
Sussemilch: Yea, I’m sorry I even brought the whole yard sign thing up. I hate yard signs, and dealing with people who want them.
This headline has the greatest tagging evar!
tennessee Jed clampett: Here’s a fun and effective way to get back at the assholes stealing your signs:
Staple a plastic bag filled with deer repellent (or paint) to the underside of your plastic bag type yard sign. When Joe the Plumber drives by at 4am and sends his wife out to pull the sign from the metal frame she will grab it and plop it down on her lap in the front seat of the pickup truck. About 3 minutes later she begins wondering what the smell is…
Really works well…
Such polite, educated racists in Silicon Valley. If you want to see proper racists, come to TX. We appear to be the best (by best I mean least educated, brutish, statement-making) racists ….evah! See linky:
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/10/20/204023/54/741/636920
Oh, warms the cockles of my heart.
We really need to be more careful about who we let in to our top secret ‘hidden agenda’ democrat meetings. These things should not be allowed to get beyond our select, elite group.
Out here in the country they’re not even bothering to steal my Obama signs - I think they are just too busy putting the crosses up every night and setting them on fire.
Do I have to choose just one?
That flyer made me realize just how un-American I really am. How could I have possibly contemplated voting for someone not sanctioned by the John Birch society? I herby pledge to spend the rest of my life dedicating myself to stopping the insidious threat of negro, race-mixing communists like Barry Obama. Thank you anonymous parking lot flyer guy. You deserve the thanks of a grateful nation.
I was tempted to make a yard sign out of painted sheet steel, anchored in concrete, but I don’t have time, and my candidate is likely to win. Next time, when I have more time/sheet steel.
tennessee Jed clampett: fucking sign vandals
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/10/15/185759/29
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/10/18/222920/02
This is like spamming the message board of real life.
Johnny Zhivago:
I have a better idea. Go around your area and dose the McCain signs with this stuff:
http://luckyrut.com/
Two things will be accomplished. First, McCain signs will now be surrounded by angry male deer who will probably start fighting each other. Sort of like a Palin rally. It would be better yet, if a few does showed up and the McCain signs were surrounded by active deer romance, just for the sheer humor of the resulting photos. Second, the hard core McCain voters will be so distracted by the prospect of hunting right there in their front yard, that they may forget to go to the polls on election day.
Holy fucking shit.
Bay Area Blue: do you live in Hayward?
When my wife and I lived there, we bought a house just off of Mission Blvd. Like good librul scum, we bought our little Kerry sign and put it up in the front yard. There were a few other Kerry signs on our block, with maybe one Bush sign.
When election time came around, our entire block had EXACTLY this kind of wingutty OCD stuff stapled to every telephone pole, particularly on the ones next to Kerry houses. Our block was clean one night, and stapled with wingnut leaflets the next.
Cursory research revealed it was somebody one neighborhood away, with a child-molester-vintage Ford van, of course with a massive American flag bolted to it, parked out front of a slightly rundown place, also near Mission, also with an assload of flags on it. Or at least a powerful suspicion in that direction.
I guess he’s slowly working his way up from “casual watercooler conversation” to “firebombing” by way of “taping OCD wingnut screeds”.
Here’s phun: Go on Ebay and buy a collectible yard sign from some local campaign in a different state, like “McCaskill for Senate” if you’re in Minnesota or something. Put it in your yard and watch the local sign-watchers heads ’splode.
#1 Reason to vote Republican: You are a pedophile who believes in family values!
How come Bill O’Reilly never attacks Wonkette as a Far Left Blog? What’s wrong with him?
Sussemilch: Yard signs are a waste of time and money except for very low-visibility local races. Campaign workers hate having to deal with people who come in demanding yard signs and offering no other kind help.
Wonkette is not a far left blog. As we speak, I am polishing my shotgun with a harp seal chamois whilst my manservant is presenting me an endangered antelope burger on a glorious leopardskin napkin.
Jeez, don’t these people have jobs? Sign vandals? Head out to Walmart and buy a life for crissakes.
Sussemilch: I was told the Obama campaign eschews what they describe as “yard chum.” I got a yard sign, but had to pay for it. Some local entrepreneurs are printing them up independently of the campaign, paying a royalty to the campaign for the privilege. I bet a lot of Obama sign theft is Obama supporters stealing them from other Obama supporters. Well, and ’cause it’s socialism, too.
This guy knows he lives in California, right? Drive to Nevada with your fliers, silly. I can take bad tactics, but I can’t condone bad strategy. Geez.
They have now moved on from signs to other things, like smashing winds and slashing tires.
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/10/20/123647/30/302/636358
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/10/20/204023/54/741/636920
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2008/10/20/141535/36/188/636472
MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend: It was Larry Craig’s car — he thought he was buying a Toyota Priapus.
After the Revolution, all will drive minivans, except Obama’s Nickelodeon operatives who must remain under cover. Code name: Barney Delta Force.
jagorev: You’re 100% right!
I was in local politics for a while and yard signs were a constant problem - even for a small time campaign like mayor or township committee. First of all, half of your signs would be oblitherated every time the county mowed for weeds. Second you had to grovel to get people to put signs on their lawn. And finally - the always fun “sign burning” or decapitated deer with signs piled on top incident.
In New Jersey Obama signs were hard to come by, I finally got one by promising to put up a zillion signs for Linda Stender (running for Congress). A neighbor actually ordered 50 signs from a printer - which should be useful to replace the lost ones.
Incidentally, here in 90% Republican western, rural, exurban, New Jersey, the Obama signs vastly outnumber the McCain signs.
WadISay: I’m a volunteer of Barry. You’re statement is true as f*ck. The only time we gave away signs was they day after the primaries. Then we locked em up again.
They still have problems with plurals, and use inconsistent casing.
Witness: Stolen elections (Acorn)
vs. Higher Taxes (only 70% pay now)
I have to defend the Valley, because it’s going to go for Obama, and this nutbar vandal with McCain/Palin signs is the strange exception rather than the rule. Caught on that unprintable obscenity, the Nimitz Freeway, yesterday, I was keeping an eye out for wingnut bumperstickers, and the closest I came was the American flag mudflaps on one of the trucks. (Great, spatter Old Glory with mire, you Communist devils.)
I would say this bit with the scotch tape was done by some Vietnameser. I know that’s racial profiling, but those guys are violent anti-communists and love to “put the hat” (Vietnamese slang for commie-baiting) on people who are to the left of them. Rock ribbed Republicans they are, and there’s droves of them, but they’re not going to save Walnuts and Caribou Barbie.
REASONS TO VOTE DEMOCRAT
*You want to bomb white infants and steal their hard-earned money.
*You wish to continue rotating hairy al Qaeda lovers.
*You hate every America, including North, South, Central and God Bless.
And here I thought all the people who supported stolen elections had been voting Republican. I guess Barack Obama really is a generational change.
When I lived in Silicon Valley, I had a creepy fundie workmate would would try to steal the Darwinfish off my car when he thought I wasn’t looking. I also knew a guy there was was both into the nudist lifestyle and a virgin in his mid-40s. There are a lot of really repressed people in the Bay Area, regardless of what the ‘real Americans’ think about it.
They forgot “You are Pro-Abortion” or is that what “You Choose” means.
I need a baby sitter, a hot baby sitter. Like I had when I was kid who would show me her boobies and make me stand in the corner when I was bad.
Could we start our own sign…
My first would be:
“You live in Texas and no longer fall for the scare tactics of Rebulicans.”
I have a friend who, through the good luck of marrying a man whose dad would die and leave them rich, lives in a gated community near OKC. She was on board very early with the big O. Her first sign was ripped out (of her gated community dwelling, yet) so the went into her deep well of yard signs and put up two. The yard sign war in her hoity-toity neighborhood was up to 6 Obamas in her pretty small front yard and she was ready to raise the ante by replacing these with 8. (She has unlimited funds to buy these suckers).
In our little town, someone wrote N— lover on my friends Obama sign. She made up her own sign announcing particular Indian Tribe, the dominant one around here, Against Racism. Hers was pretty hokey and badly lettered, which serves the rednecks in her neighborhood right.
The difference in previous years is that yeah, yard signs don’t really matter and we few Ds who put them out just shake our heads sadly the day after when we see it gone. This time, even in redneck land, Dems are fighting back.
jagorev: I have a corner house in the middle of church row. It’s not a big city, but we live at the social epicenter of a county seat. What goes in my yard, everyone sees.
A few years ago we had someone try to plant signs in my yard and I took them down. They came back later and asked for the signs back if we weren’t going to display them. I told them I threw them away, same as I treat anything else thrown in my lawn. They were pissed off and cursed at me for wasting their hard work.
As a result, his opponent got a large, hand-made sign made for him in the corner of my lot that every church-goer saw every Sunday for sixteen weeks. I had no idea who the guy was - but he won.
I’m jealous. I have 3 kids and I’d love a babysitter for life. Do you think Michelle Obama would do it?
That sign is totally wrong. Everyone knows we’re only in it for the sex.
Yeah, when the socialists take over you won’t have yards anymore. You will have to go to day care and be babysitted for life.
A guy in our very-McCain neighborhood in Tennessee (yes they even have more signs than Barry, it’s a sorry assed place to live) took revenge on the sign stealers by mowing the word OBAMA into his really quite big front lawn and painting in the letters white. Steal that, bitches!
Awesome. It’s all passiveaggressivenotes.com up in here today.
I can’t wait to pull the lever for the New Socialist/Communist Party on election day!
8. You love smoking crack with Hussein in the back of a limo (drug addicts stick together!)
9. You think Hopey has a big schlong & he promised to let you “cuddle” with it if you vote 4 him (he tells that to everyone dummy)
10. You are desperately looking forward to Hopey’s “chicken, watermelon & kool-aid” coupons (you Iraq/Afghanistan vets are so soft)
11. You want healthcare (ha!!!!!)
12. You believe wimpy Michelle when she threatened to kick ur stoopid cracker/whitey ass if you don’t vote for her muslim robot homeboy
13. You have a domestic terrorist cell in your toilet that u started when u were 8 years old (that shit is deadly!)
Itsjustme: And you support “Women’s Health” which is just an insider term for bombing baby Jesus.
Doglessliberal: Just posted this on that thread….
“To all the folks out there who are spinning wild tales about this, please go to Snopes.com and type in the search bar “Obama birth certificate”. Obama released his birth certificate over the Summer (not that any other pres. candidate has EVER been asked to do such a thing). Snopes even has a scan of it if you want to peruse it for yourself. Maybe before you hide behind your computer and slander people, you try doing basic research just to be sure you are not flat out wrong. Or is Snopes.com “in the tank?”.
Posted by: ivenson | October 21, 2008 12:02 PM | Report abuse
ivenson: I heard someone on the radio say that snopes.com is in the tank. So yes, your pleas for intelligence are futile. Luckily our new socialist system will offer mental services to the crazies.
Observable Reality is in the tank. It’s those witchcraft voodoo motherfuckers you have to worry about.
Hah! I saw that second sign on a minivan while driving around last night in Sunnyvale! It was good for a laugh.
The fact that this note was written in bulleted list form proves that the writer is an Assburger.
Hey, someone took a preso I’ve been working on and my tape dispenser out of my cubey — anyone know anything about that?
Gopherit v2.0: Good lord, I’d pay good money to see that. Y’know, Euros.
And that is Notepad use you can believe in
I hate America and am a racist, but I don’t have white guilt. Can I still vote for Obama?
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
That’s kinda hilarious, but, given that it’s Silicon Valley, it would have to be a furtive gesture. I’ve only ever seen three McCain stickers total on my commute. My favorite McCain bumper had a “We Support the IDF” sticker for symmetry.
I’ve heard of:
Communists,
Shootists,
Baptists,
Methodists,
babies that are the cutist;
but,
Racsists? Are they the ones that drive NASCARs real fast?
BO/JB n oh aight
Breakfast Bourbon: Well, there were no grammer and spelling errors to ridicule. When God gives you lemons…
I am being overwhelmed by things to do. I start my day by vowing to hate America even more, but then have to put in a volunteer hour campaigning for the Communist Party, then go check out library books to burn and then its time for a nap with my male lesbian life partner. Busy.
Me: So black people can’t vote for Obama, given this list..
Officemate: No, see, you guys are number 6. Racists - like Colin Powell?
Me: Ah…this is thorough…
My kids are grown but I still want a babysitter for life! I’m tired of taking care of myself. Sign me up!
So one of the houses I walk by on my way to/from the Metro has had a bit of a yard sign problem:
The first one was a plain old McCain/Palin sign.
The next week, it was a replacement sign with a little note on it promising criminal prosecution of anyone caught stealing the sign from “private property.”
The third week the new replacement sign had a message scrawled across the top cautioning passers-by to smile for the camera as they were being recorded.
Sadly, the fourth week, they just left the charred remains of their lawn sign stuck into the ground and added another new replacement sign to the porch.
I kinda wanted to see what the sign-vandal had in store next. I mean, once you’ve torched a sign, what’s next?
BTW, this is on Capitol Hill, within the same block as the RNC. Awesome.
ivenson: thank you!
Just like Martin Luther before him, this citizen has taken it upon himself to question if something is douchebaggery by being a bigger douchebag.
I dunno, it’s starting to look like McCain really doesn’t want win this thing after all. Otherwise where’s the wisdom in reminding homeless, jobless, hopeless people every single day that a vote for Obama is a vote for….I dunno…..food, shelter, health care, incentive checks, and basically more bang for your tax buck. He reminds us every hour on the hour that the tax moniez should go to hedonists elitists because we don’t deserve it. Why are so many poor people Republicans? Is there a vast masochistic underground that needs to be vigorously probed (or whatever Bachman said). In the olden days poor people voted Repub because the rich white overlord would keep them employed in the coal mines. Then the big boss man figured out eh why let it trickle.
jjgittes: I live in Sunnyvale. I haven’t seen 1…not a single McCain poster all year. Now, this Conservative Lemming puts up his bullshit posters with Scotch tape on an Obama supporter’s mini-van. We also have a neighbor who put up a No on Prop 8 poster. They moved here from China. You would think they would have a problem with governments suppressing the rights of people.
I’m not so sure I like knowing that there is a serial Republican in my neighborhood.
A lot of the fear permeating throughout the Republican rhetoric is that honkies will be enslaved by the minorities. White people are in the minority in California and I’m cool with that. Nothing changed and I’m not being forced to speak “Mexican”. The rest of the country that hasn’t been exposed to other cultures are circling the wagons in fear that change is coming. This country has always been considered a melting pot. Now that the ingredients of the melting pot are quickly becoming more “brown,” the white ingredients in the middle of the country are starting to curdle with fear and rage.
We should ask Todd Palin to lead them to salvation in Alaska and let them secede from the Union.
Bay Area Blue: Blue, your whole melting pot analogy just reminded me of an unforgettable soup I had at a restaurant in Paris: deep brown cream of chestnut topped with an ivory white dollop of creme fraiche. I could almost taste the fear and rage when it was set down in front of me. But once everything was mixed together, it was so beautiful that I dream about that soup night and day.
Bay Area Blue: Isn’t “No on Prop 8″ the vote that means the court ruling stands? I thought voting No on Prop 8 meant you supported the right to same-sex marriage.
Grumpyshoes: I meant Yes on Prop 8….I have No on Prop 8 in my head.
Will there be a national game show to determine which one Terrorist we will collectively support? Will Simon Cowell be the judge? I hope! I hope! I can see it now, “America’s Next Top Suicider!”
Definitely Reason #5 for me.