Wonkette
Oh yes my friends, there is definitely a “JohnMcCain.com/Joe” site up and running now, and it’s a contest. How do you like that logo? It’s styled after a traditional blue collar name tag, for perhaps a set of overalls — a cute throwback to the 1950s, which was the last time America actually had blue collar jobs.
The contest: send John McCain 30-second YouTube clips of why YOU, the average American, are also Joe the Plumber. The winning video will appear in some lousy McCain ad down the road, and the video’s star will immediately have his or her tax, property and professional licensing records vetted by the Huffington Post, Keith Olbermann and various blood wolves from the very wealthy New York City. So dear readers, why are YOU a registered Republican who will get a huge tax break under Barack Obama’s economic plan which is somehow socialism?
This looks like a ripoff of “I’m A PC” from Microsoft.
The best part of McCain’s already tired Joe the Plumber speech is when he lists off other name/occupation combos who are supposedly in the same position as dear old Joe. One he lists is Wendy the Waitress. Now, I had no idea that waitresses made more than $250,000 a year. That little factoid would have changed my career choice right out of high school, for sure.
I am Joe the Plumber because I enjoy laying pipe. Now bring me a Schlitz
I am Spartacus! Or Joe. One of those. Can I haz tax credit?
Why am I Joe the Plumber? Because, just like that exalted fabrication, my first name isn’t Joe, I’m not a plumber, and Obama’s tax plan is going to help me rather than hurt me.
That’s about the gayest damn thing I have ever seen, and by gay I mean “lame”.
Also, if I enter, they may pick ME, a Massachusetts gay Democrat man married to another man 10 years my senior, neither of us with plumbing licenses. Given Mccain’s vetting process, I’m a shoe in!
This is just asking for a flood of satirical videos, each of which will have to be watched and decoded by a Palindrone somewhere…
“I’m Joe the Plumber because I would also be better off under Obama’s tax plan”
I am Joe the Plumber because I am delusional white trash with no future and no grasp of economics, politics or anything that doesn’t involve trucks or Jesus Christ Almighty
Listen, if you’re gonna vote WALNUTS! at least own up to it and admit you’re either stupid, rich, or racist. Don’t feed me some bullshit lie about your $42K a year broke-ass voting for WALNUTS! because of tax cuts, because yes, WALNUTS! will cut taxes, but not for your broke-ass.
Anyone contacted Ayers to make a Bill the Terrorist clip?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: If you are really Joe the Plumber you don’t even PAY taxes, because taxes unfairly “penalize” Hardworking Americans who have to pay them to support Welfare Mud-People and fund clinics and build roads. Why don’t the damn lazy highways GET A JOB?
Keep on keepin’ on with your civil disobedience Joe!
“Don’t spread the wealth, spread the legs and keep a wide stance.”
- Larry Craig’s submission for Joe the Plumber.
Joe the Plumber has girly handwriting?
choinski: For Joe the Plumber or a Cabinet position?
Wait, did this “Joe the Plumber” malarkey test well in focus groups or something? I thought we, as Americans, came together to do a bipartisan eyeroll when McCain started screaming about some new “inspired by actual events” campaign mascot?
Here’s your marching orders:
- Create a one-minute video with whatever tag or title it needs to be considered
- At the 30 second mark, flash a one-second image of a hot chick holding a gun in front of an American flag or something. This is what will appear for the thumbnail preview of the video. GENERATE MEGA VIEWS.
- Vote it a 5, then immediately disable voting, so that it maintains a perfect 5 score.
- From the 0:00-0:29 and 0:31-0:60 mark, BARACKROLL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65I0HNvTDH4&feature=related
Jose el Plummer es Presidente de los Interpipes!
So won’t the real Plumber please stand up, please stand up, please stand up.
“I’m Joe the plumber. I’m ready to lay some pipe whenever the right opportunity arises, but I don’t want my pipe to be taxed!”
My Entry: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyE6vwizihg
Formerly Preferred: I beleive he’s been connected to Bill The Cat
TGY: Jose el Plomero better watch his back for La Migra if the real Joe the (unreal) Plumber gets his way.
John McCain’s campaign is a retard.
This would be so much better if people used their bowling names for this effort. I think Joe the Plumber could go far if he had a lady named Flo at his side…
Where does the Ty-D-Bowl man stand?
By the way, what the hell is it with plumbers and politics?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polish_plumber
I thought Joe the plumber was Joe the Plumber?
“Hi, please provide us with an alternate reality to use to justify the stupid shit our candidate said on TV. Thanks much.”
Hi, I’m Joe the plumber, and though I only take home $34,000 a year after taxes, I dream of one day Owning General Electric. And the thought that when that day comes (if it ever does) I’ll be asked to pay tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars in taxes to help build roads and schools and pay teachers and cops and treat waste-water and run agencies such as the FDA and that help out deadbeats who only take home $34,000 just MAKES MY FUCKING BLOOD BOIL!!!!!!!!! DAMMIT, WHERE’S My GUN?
facehead: Wow! That’s a big one!
Also, how McPalin keeps convincing the poor bitters that they make over 250k is a testament to how remarkably braindead their “base” is.
Evidently Sarah’s added to the list of stooooooooopid archetypes with her “Daisy the Dairymaid” or some such nonsense. Mind you, I can only imagine the vids of this!
The real “Joe” will be on Sean Klannity’s radio show in just a few moments.
My video will be set in the Minneapolis Airport men’s restroom. A muscular, shirtless Joe the plumber will be hard at work in a bathroom stall. A pantless Larry Craig will peek over the top of the stall and drool at Joe’s shirtless, sweaty body. Larry will assume a wide stance and flash his wedding ring in Joe’s direction. Joe will blush like a school girl and crawl under the stall to help Larry with his pipe. Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get it On” will be playing in the background.
Oh Walnuts — not even porn stars who play plumbers in pornos make $250k.
Every libtard worth the name should read two books by Thomas Franks. No, not the wingnut general. They are “What’s the Matter with Kansas?” and “The Wrecking Crew.” The first shows how the R’s get these poor sh*t’s to vote against their own interests, the second is a snapshot of how they govern. Scary.
Joe the Plumber walks into a house, sees Sammy Davis Jr. curled up inside a kick drum.
Joe: Who are you?
Guy: I’m the JANITOR IN A DRUM. Who the fuck are YOU?
Joe: I am … JOE THE PLUMBER!
the end
magic titty: No, it is special.
Given the salary, shouldn’t the plumber uniform include a top hat and monocle?
Serolf Divad: Win.
Everybody’s been on and on about this ‘Joe the Plumber’.
What about Lindsay the Hooker, Leroy the Crackhead, Elvin the Leper, Fiona the Midget.
These are all people too, What’s John McCain got against them?
Humph! My friends, My Ass!
Hi im joe the plumber and i like barack obama because while i say i am a plumber the only pipe i handle is meth pipe so under barack obamas plan i will get a tax cut and have more money to buy meth and tape and hooks. Now i relize i havent worked in 4 months so i wont get a tax cut but a tax credit even better, free meth. Also smoking meth has taken its toll on my teeth so obamas free healthcare will also be a bonus. My crackwhore wife can quit given bjs at the busstop to support her habit. I can quit given bjs in the bus station bathroom to support my habit, actually i probaly wont because i kinda like it, im dirty that way. so ill be voting for john mccain cuz he gave me a bj in the bus station bathroom and 50 bux for food but i bought meth. Im joe the plumber and i support this message, paid for by mccain/palin2008
I hope that they have a rule that the “Joes” have to put their phone numbers on the videos, for everyone out there who needs some work done on their “plumbing”.
Shouldn’t Joe be “Jose” since the illegals took all our $250K jobs because real Americans are too lazy to start up a company but have to pester Presidential campaigns rather than work?
this is the porniest plumber I could find:
http://www.animationarchive.org/pics/petty16-big.jpg
“To be, or not to be, that is the question.” — Christopher the Plummer.
I’m Joe the Plummer because I like to sit on my sofa watching TV, drinking by Schlitz, and scratching my ass.
SayItWithWookies: That actually makes you the same as the original “Joe the Plumber” since his first name isn’t Joe, he’s not a licensed plumber, and that mean black man who he confronted on the street would save him money even if he bought the business he said he was going to but probably won’t anyway.
Where do we fit the tax liens on the bumper sticker?
I’m Joe the Plumber and I wish John McCain would stop beating this dead horse because my life is being ruined by the media attention.
They could probably find a guy who’d represent the campaign better than this: http://tinyurl.com/5nrhmn
I don’t know if its been said yet, but this Joe the Plumber thing looks just like this William Schumann soldier thing from Wag the Dog, don’t you think?
Has anyone actually had to call a plumber lately and pay the bill?
I’m thinking $250K a year is well within reach!
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_average_hourly_rate_for_a_licensed_plummer
I’m Joe the Plumber because I like getting the neocon crap out of drainpipes that have been rotting for 8 years.
gogal: good point.
All the bitters who make $20,000 a year, but imagine that it’s only a matter of time until they make $250,000, are really not planning to EARN the money. They just think they’re going to hit the lottery and become millionaires. So the first person who campaigns on the platform of “no taxes on lottery winnings” will be the next president, hands down.
Joe the Plumber is a rip-off!
http://gogal.wordpress.com/