Wonkette
John McCain has selected someone to head his — get this — “White House transition team,” and of course the person is an old corrupt Washington lobbyist, so basically JOHN MCCAIN IS PAYING THE LOBBYISTS MONEY FOR SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T EXIST. But! More Scandal! This terrible lobbyist is one William Timmons, a famous goat warlock from Narnia. (Or was that Tumnus? Whatever, they are all hobbits from fantasy closets.) He was also best friends with Saddam Hussein forever, until John McCain killed Saddam Hussein on a cellphone video several years ago.
From the liberal Huffington Post:
William Timmons, the Washington lobbyist who John McCain has named to head his presidential transition team, aided an influence effort on behalf of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein to ease international sanctions against his regime.
The two lobbyists who Timmons worked closely with over a five year period on the lobbying campaign later either pleaded guilty to or were convicted of federal criminal charges that they had acted as unregistered agents of Saddam Hussein’s government.
During the same period beginning in 1992, Timmons worked closely with the two lobbyists, Samir Vincent and Tongsun Park, on a previously unreported prospective deal with the Iraqis in which they hoped to be awarded a contract to purchase and resell Iraqi oil. Timmons, Vincent, and Park stood to share at least $45 million if the business deal went through.
Timmons claimed that he had no idea these two Moozie and Chinese-ish money fat cats were working with the illegal human Saddam Hussein in any other awful respect; it was supposed to be an innocent, one-time “lobby to let Saddam do whatever he wants in exchange for Iraqi oil/blood money” sort of gentleman’s jaunt.
Anyway, this report is really long so just read a few topic sentences and then go play the Obama Xbox game. John McCain hired a filthy lobbyist to do nothing, for oil, supporting Muslims etc. and so on and so forth.
McCain Transition Chief Aided Saddam In Lobbying Effort [Huffington Post]
wow what a piece of shit.
Stop looking to the past!
I guess Trig wasn’t available?
It doesn’t matter, McCain could vivisect a live choirboy during tomorrow’s debate and his campaign wouldn’t be any worse off.
Transition to what?! That good night?
“Pal’d” is definitely a better spelling. “Palled” sounds like they carried a coffin around together.
Yes, but did Saddam ever plan to blow up the Pentagon?!!? DID HE?!?! Wait… he probably did.
“transition team?” He’s finally moving into the house filled with teh olds?
I just have to think that the monkeys running this campaign wouldn’t be put to better use serving beers somewhere….
WALNUTS IS FULL OF SHIT THE END
Scarab: He would probably be BETTER off, what with the popularity of Showtime’s hit series “Dexter”. It would at least prove his Maverick bona fides, and show he is not a tool of the religious right.
Ed Koch and Jack Lemmon had a son?
SayItWithWookies: Let’s hope it’s not gently…
They were lobbyists for Sadaam for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS! Coincidence? You be the judge.
his transitional team of mavericks, i presume?
OK, so a member of his staff aided an influence effort on behalf of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein to ease international sanctions against his regime…but at least McCain’s middle name is HUSSEIN! Come on people, which is worse?
Transition team is a fancy way of saying he’s advising McCain’s move into assisted living.
Scarab: It’s only vivisection if we learn something from it. Since that would be neither surprising nor educational, I believe you mean “eviscerate.”
Blue Line: Agh, I meant McCain’s middle name ISN’T Hussein. I ruined my sarcastic point.
Either way, HA HA, Walnuts is made of fail.
This wasn’t the October Surprise that Walnuts was hoping for.
Invest in victory
shortsshortsshorts: Transitional living team.
Is this the guy in charge of measuring drapes?
“Transition team” are the docs who are going to do his game-changing sex change.
So, out of the spider-hole comes Lobbyist Timmons to head, and I loved this from another’s post, “Crazyfarts McBomb and Sideshow Moosetit”’s TRANSITION team!?! Transition to what?!?
If only Barry had agreed to eleventy billion townhalls, Grampy wouldn’t have had to hire that terrorist.
SayItWithWookies: shortsshortsshorts: Maybe it’s the menopause transition? I never knew you were allowed to name a team for that. I’ll take Linda Evans and Joan Collins for mine. Menopause: Now with 100% More Catfight.
He was great as the motorman in Taking of Pelham One Two Three.
1) Denounce dictator
2) Take bribes from dictator
3) Kill dictator
4) Profit!
When you re-invent a campaign, you have to invent a lotta crap.
This is a lotta crap which Sarah will explain to us all in due course.
I’m waiting, Sarah.
(She has a way with words, y’know).
of course, we can all count on the MSM giving another Free Pass on this.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Terrifying.
Again, McCain is laying out the Tarantino style revenge in slow and painful doses. He’ll never make the Republicans forget campaign 2000 and the black-baby smear. “Kill the Republicans. KILL THE REPUBLICANS!”
Yet he loves to say, in rather jeering tones, that OBAMA is having the drapes measured for the White House????
It’s like that crazy childhood game where you are what you call others- the senile version.
I don’t think I can make it three more weeks. Must. go. on.
Republicans never do anything accidentally. Did they figure this just wasn’t going to be their year, so they said what the hell–let Walnuts go down and, hey, if he wants to do it with that moron piece of ass from Alaska, who cares?
What else could explain how strangely incompetent is the campaign they are running.
Or could it be the world is in such a mess that the voters are actually concentrating on real issues? Hmmm. . . . .
Nah. Walnuts is crazy and so are a majority of Republican voters.
Unfortunately, as someone who was born a registered Democrat, I know my party can blow it at the last minute. Otherwise, the Dems wouldn’t be so lovable. Losers, but lovable.
LA Times new national figures - Obama 50%, McNugget 41%.
Heading the “Transition Team,” means he knows how to dig a proper Christian grave.
Scarab: Worse off? That’s change I COULD believe in!
HuskyMescan: Damn! Of course! It all makes sense now! It’s just like George Lucas and HOWARD THE DUCK, which was revenge on Universal Executives for not believing in AMERICAN GRAFITTI.
Can he measure the drapes while he’s at it?
Beans: Dems are actually willing to lose an election on principles. See Dukakis, Mondale, but Repubes must always win all the time. It’s their thing. (I almost said ‘ethos”, which would have gotten me wished out into the cornfield.)
SayItWithWookies: Haha, beautiful.
ManchuCandidate: and win!
Beans: Kinda like the cubs.
He must not have been a very good lobbyist! Look how we fucked over his client!
It is completely unfair to point out all the direct links between Republicans and Saddam Hussein when tenuous and ideological connections between Democrats and various 1960’s terrorists can be literarily alleged.
Beans:
Really?
Does this mean that Mark Foley Page-diddle-gate was planned and they meant to lose the House?
Seriously, you give them too much credit. See Iraq Post Invasion, Afghanistan Post “Invasion”, Katrina, Wall St, Hurricane Ike, etc. If they were that brilliant then everything they’ve done would be a resounding success.
EnBuenOra: He used to be our friend, ok? That was until he stopped wanting to sell us oil for food.
It may all be true, but do we know the real Obama? We don’t, so we must vote for WALNUTS/Caribou Barbie.
(that, and Obama’s a nigger).
azw88: I think we need to see some more Ask a Lobbyist post…a few people here still think a lobbist has to actually “achieve” something to be considered good at what they do (which is getting paying clients).
Its kind of disgusting how he is just post-nose-picking in that picture and is considering his next move as he roles the nugget around in his fingers.
“LA Times new national figures - Obama 50%, McNugget 41%.”
nurple: That leaves 9%, all bitter, all racist, all 4 Walnuts.
Not good.
Hey while all this goofy madness is going on, who is Dick Cheney raping?
problemwithcaring: Yeah, but if you your client gets bombed back to the stone ages (literally, not figuratively like the oil-gas lobbyists and Interior Dept.) then you pretty much suck as a lobbyist, since getting booted from power and hanged is something that I would expect my lobbyist made SURE didn’t EVER happen to me.
In addition, Timmons recently rode the Metro where, the day before, there had been this dude whose stoner second cousin wore, like, you know, this T-shirt that said Palin was like a va-jay-vay and that like caught on fire after the cousin fell asleep watching the tube in his parents’ basement.
Get out of that one, Señor John McCain, you betcha.
dilhavarti: Are you talking about a person or a country?
S.Luggo: well, it’s all just sharpie lines on a document anyway.
Meh. At this point, McCain could nominate a one-armed pederast to his imaginary White House transition team and it wouldn’t matter. The old man is barely polling above Cynthia McKinney.
azw88: Yea, concur. That’s a decent starting point for negotiatons…
“liberal Huffington Post”? Are you sure that’s their lean?
And even worse: he was a member of Nick Lache’s failed boyband, 98 Degrees.
McCain’s much anticipated William Ayers attack at tomorrow’s debate will end in tears.
But it could be worse, he could have picked a NAMBLA lobbyist to head The Team. That would be worse, right?
Based on the TERRIBLE decision making at McCain HQ, I’m starting to suspect that there is a democrat mole planted deep inside their organization who is planting ideas in their heads, rewording their memos, and purposely advising them like shit.
Beans: Dems: the Chicago Cubs of politics.
Advocatus_Diaboli: Weren’t you voted off the blog yesterday, during the cleansing? I’m trying to see the humor, but it isn’t coming through…sorry for being such a simpleton, and all…
Rodney Badger: Don’t count out that possibility yet.
AnnieGetYourFun: I was going to say the Cleveland Browns, but I like your choice better…
dilhavarti: us…feel the pain…
Last time they met, McCain looked (as I noted at the time) like a diseased featherless parrot fussing around the feet of a beautiful talented movie star. What is he going to look like tomorrow, and why am I supposed to watch that evil old man twitching and fulminating, instead of the Phillies?
Transition to the fuckin’ morgue, you ghostly Morlock. You have 2½ weeks to have that stroke. Have a steak-n-cheese.
Is this back to the old Bush canard: “When I take my hand off the Bible…” to act like he was already Pres’nint? Why not go ahead and announce his Cabinet tomorrow night at the debate. With the judgement he used to pick Palin, man the list is endless. Christie Whitman at State? Macaca Allen at Defense? Ted Stevens at Education? Milburn Drysdale at Treasury?
I sincerely hope Timmons’ only real competition was an illegal Messkan immigrant. Why is it the Repubs use every opportunity available to them to appoint corrupt lobbyists with shady pasts to high offices in their campaigns/administrations?
Staffer: “Senator McCain, this properly-vetted, above-reproach, unblemished and distinguished public official looks like a great guy to head up your transition team.”
WALNUTS!: “Nah, let’s just go with the guy that worked for Saddam…”
HedonismBot: Uhhh…after eight years feeding at the trough, there are no “properly-vetted, above-reproach, unblemished and distinguished public officials” in the GOP. Maybe his head of transition should be Jon Stewart.
nurple: Nurp, best obscure move references evah! I hope you occasionally get out of the house…
JoeFannyPack:
yes, he does appear to be rolling a booger twixt thumb and forefinger.
cheeto_jeebus: No, he’s saying “you know how much John McCain cares for doing things that don’t make him look like a hypocrite? THIS much!”
dilhavarti: He’s in the undisclosed location, planning the real surprise.
AnnieGetYourFun:
That’s a good analogy.
http://www.offeringcommonsense.blogspot.com
HedonismBot: yeah maybe or he could be sitting there saying, I ain’t got nothin. Nope. Just this little booger here.
HuskyMescan: Yes. Now it all makes sense.
Wait, there’s an Obama XBox game?
accidental_tourist: I,too, grow weary. And just when I think it can’t get crazier..it does. The sheer idiocy of the McCain campaign leaves me speechless. I find that my snark levels are draining daily, with the constant barrage of their ineptitude.
PS- Did anybody get banned in yesterday’s bloodletting?
accidental_tourist: that crazy childhood game is called “projection”. A lot of crazy people like to play it. “You must be doing what *I’m* doing! Only you’re *bad* for doing it!”
As potential head of the “White House transition team”, can you tell us what experience you’ve had pretending to do things?
Tut, tut, tut. Old walnuts is getting ahead of himself again.
Anyway, I gotta make this short cause I’ve promised to help Barry and Michelle pick out new carpet, drapes, tiles and other furnisher and accessories.
OOOOOH. I also gotta run the list of celebs to perform at the inauguration. Phew, so much work so little time.
i was going to make a witty comment about that guy’s tie (”wtf is that? goats?”)
then i realized it was likely a classy all-american dog with a feathery tail of some sort and now i am sad.
saddam hussein still lives! they don’t actually show him dying. and they say he had all those stunt doubles hanging around all the time. if they did kill anyone, they killed the wrong guy.
Jim Newell: if you wrote the headline for this article, congrats on the use of “pal’d,” which I like better than ubiqitous and ambiguous “palled.”
SayItWithWookies: The nursing home–24 hour depends care!
nurple: NYT Shows it Hopey 53 to Grumpus 39. This keeps up, Obama’s gonna be buying cans of whup-ass by the case at Sam’s Club, fer sher
http://graphics8.nytimes.com/packages/pdf/politics/20081015_POLL.pdf
SayItWithWookies:Win. Beautiful. The literary references around here kill me.
nurple: Also win. I’ve asked before about having more than one win, but no one has told me otherwise.
As Paulson said this morning, “The facts have changed…”