About the author

Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith


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  • PortlandSmartAss

    Could be why she was able to make it into those extraordinarily high-level colleges.

  • dave666

    I can see why she saved it

  • Sussemilch

    You get 200 of those points for signing your name on the test.

  • Doglessliberal

    D in foreign language. I guess she hadn’t absorbed enough Russia yet.

  • gjdodger

    She’s WHITE?

  • dano

    C in social studies and a D in foreign language? This is obviously a forgery. I refuse to believe that the greatest political mind of the 21st century was a lousy student! Damn librels!

  • dave666

    McCain wouod have released his, but the stone it was carved on broke.

  • voyetra8

    Oh, Mooselini. I used to look up to you…. but now I can’t even look at you.

  • Lorax

    Wait–a D in foreign languages? Surely she was able to absorb some Russian through cross-border osmosis?

  • magic titty

    Well, you can’t say she doesn’t represent her ‘stituency.

  • MathewBrooks

    GPA of 2.2?!?!? LOLZ!!!1!

  • ReverendGreen

    Palin became insufferable within weeks, and the worst part is Republicans love this idiocy and the general population is stupid enough to forget about how disastrous Bush and his policies have been by 2012; this woman is a horror movie monster that will continue to scare the hell out of us every 4 years

  • blader

    If this ode to ignorance doesn’t solidify the base, nothing will.

  • ihasasad

    Does that say ‘English Best Language’? Cause English ain’t her best language

  • WikipediaBrown

    Unfortunately, it’s probably a fake. 574 is the SS area number for someone born in Alaska. The Lipstick Pig was born in Idaho. The scores do seem right though!

  • PrairiePossum

    The bitter wingnuts will see this and rejoice, “She’s just like us — dumb as a stick!”

  • Cogito Ergo Bibo

    I sincerely hope that is a fake. Truly. It’s just too depressing to think it might be true and that fucker STILL chose that airhead to pander to my vagina.

  • Terry

    Good grief, the football players I went to High School with at a public school in Prince George’s County, MD, had higher scores than that.

    Then again, she fits in well with a running mate who graduated pretty much at the bottom of his class at the Naval Academy.

  • TJBeck

    Self reported “C” in social studies? That’s what I like to see in a candidate!

    I beat SP on the SAT by more than what the Dow lost yesterday…

  • Johnny Zhivago

    [re=129256]Doglessliberal[/re]: You’d think someone who lived so close to Russia would be able to at least speak Russian.

    [re=129268]ihasasad[/re]: Her best language is “Authentic Frontier Jibberish”

  • BigDupa

    Pretty good for a star baskeball player.

  • nurple

    I got a 1390. I make less than the janitor. I’m 42 and I have a roomate. I am mentally prepared for the Depression.

  • NoWireHangers

    As believable as a combined 841 on the SAT is, this is probably a fake. Not that it matters; her drooling stupidity would probably only endear her to large swath of the populace.

  • Gopherit v2.0

    Scores like this would make it hard for an athlete to get into a PAC 10 school. Go Sarah!

    And yes, I’ll totally believe these until she proves otherwise. Pony up those transcripts, Palin!

  • grendel

    OMG… I almost got as high as HER WHOLE SCORE on EACH of the 2 sections… B in Biology? I guess they didn’t teach any sex-ed or reproductive science in those classes…

  • Gopherit v2.0

    [re=129275]TJBeck[/re]: She probably misspelled it in the self report.

  • Dave J.

    Pretty sure all SAT scores end in a “0,” though, no?

  • WadISay

    I wonder how she did in Sex Ed, or maybe she got alternate credit by practicing abstinence only.

  • Johnny Zhivago

    You know what we used to call kids who got SAT scores like this???


  • astroprofeddie

    The College Board is in the tank for Obama

  • user-of-owls

    [re=129273]Cogito Ergo Bibo[/re]: You’ve kind of expressed something I’ve been wondering about recently, which is whether it is possible to experience ‘auto-schadenfreude.”

  • magic titty

    [re=129277]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: It’s called ‘Wasilla Sassy’, thank you very much.

  • Cogito Ergo Bibo

    [re=129288]Dave J.[/re]: They may now, but they sure didn’t in 1981 when I took it. They’ve changed the scoring since back then.

  • Gopherit v2.0

    [re=129289]WadISay[/re]: Practice didn’t make perfect, but it did make Track.

  • Lazy Media

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: Yeah, but back then you didn’t get your government papers at birth. I didn’t get a SS number issued to me until I was in elementary school. I was born in Virginia, but my SSN prefix reflects my living in Tennessee when it was issued. And I’m only two years older than the Thrilla from Wasilla.

    It’s still probably a fake (how would they get it?), but that’s not a deal-breaker. She moved to Alaska when she was an infant.

  • Crapola

    The SAT is obviously CULTURALLY BIASED! Otherwise, how do explain the lack of a Moose Field Dressing section?!

  • Jebediah

    Hey, at least she’s smarter than about 2/5 of the country!

  • user-of-owls

    [re=129281]NoWireHangers[/re]: Maybe not a wide swath, but certainly the bottom 36th percentile.

  • grendel

    [re=129288]Dave J.[/re]: Yeah, I think they do… damn, I SOOO wanted this to be true. It’s probably not far off, though.

  • nurple

    It strikes me it would be hard to fake that old-timey LQ high-speed type. Of course, the Bilderbergs and Trilateral Commission can do anything.

  • MoodProcessor

    When I was in school, in those pre-braces years, there we a couple of girls in my class that would straighten out paper clips and wear them over their teeth in order to simulate the look of braces or a retainer.

    I asked them about it one day, and one of them responded:
    “It’s better than going to some dumb old dentist.”

    I’d put good money on they’re support of McCain/Palin.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …geez, she is barely community college material!

  • marioninnyc

    I’m sure these scores fall within the average range. Isn’t the whole point to have someone who can identify with Joe Sixpack and Helen the Hockey Mom? Are you suggesting that we might want to pick some argula eatin, none g droppin, pointy-headed, cosmopolitan, elitist, commie?

  • StrangelyBrown

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: I’m not saying this isn’t a fake, but the SSN rationale doesn’t hold. People only started getting their Social Security cards at birth in the late 1970s, so it’s very likely that Sarah has an Alaska SSN.

  • azw88

    I think that the document is a fake, but just like the phony letter used by Dan Rather/CBS News 4 years ago, the document is a relatively accurate portrayal of the truth.

    I don’t see how she could have gotten into Hawaii-Hilo with scores THAT low….

    but scores THAT low sure would explain just about everything else, so who knows…

  • ManchuCandidate

    No surprise to me considering who the bulk of her supporters are.

    In the land of the stupid, the half wit is queen.

  • WhatTheHeck

    I read this somewhere. Could it be true:

    Palin’s Educational Background:
Hawaii Pacific University – 1 semester
North Idaho College – 2 semesters – general study
University of Idaho – 2 semesters – journalism
Matanuska-Susitna College – 1 semester
University of Idaho – 3 semesters – B.A. in Journalism

  • StrangelyBrown

    [re=129299]Lazy Media[/re]: I am clearly lazier than the Lazy Media.

  • Servo

    That can’t be accurate. This is a woman that failed lunch in elementary school, for trying to hold Sermons on The Mount in the playground ( with mud puddle baptisms ). I think those numbers are her bowling league averages.

  • Anonymous Office Zombie

    [re=129272]PrairiePossum[/re]: Yeah, exactly. Proof of stupidity is like mass street cred among the lynchin’ base.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    [re=129280]nurple[/re]: …well I took the SAT once and scored a 1080. But then again that was after getting so wasted the night before, that when I took the test the following morning I was still drunk.

  • persiflage

    Look closely. All the numbers physically line up except for the verbal and math scores. When are you asshats gonna learn how to use Photoshop?

  • WikipediaBrown

    [re=129313]StrangelyBrown[/re]: Ahhh, I see. I’m just a young whippersnapper and didn’t know that!

  • StrangelyBrown

    Also, “Part-time hours worked: under 6”? I thought the governor was workin’ two jobs her whole life, and that’s why she couldn’t take those fancy-schmancy trips to Europe like all you Elitists did?

  • TGY

    We need no fake proof to raise the ‘Stupid’ flag.

  • MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend

    We’ve all heard her speak…this is probably not fake.

  • Lazy Media

    Oh, btw, that wasn’t as bad a score as it would be now. They keep dumbing down the test and recalibrating the SAT to keep the modern illiterate kiddies from feeling stupid. The only significant number is 36th percentile of college-bound seniors in English, and 31st in math. Anybody dispute that she’s dumber than two-thirds of the college-educated people in America? Anybody?

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …after scoring that low, the “career counselors” probably told her the only professions she qualified for was “Beauty Queen” and “Baby Machine”.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …I heard Barack Obama scored 666 in both the reading and math sections!

  • Larry McAwful

    [re=129313]StrangelyBrown[/re]: That’s true. And considering that the Heath family moved from Idaho to Alaska when baby Sarah was only four months old, it makes sense that she’d have a Social Security number issued in Alaska. It would be credible if she had one from Idaho, too, but the Alaska number is believable.

    I was going to start posting about this, but that there was already a heated Social Security number discussion going on. I’m not the only nerd like me!

  • NoStyleHere

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: The Social Security number prefixes are determined by where your card is issued, not where you were born. E.g., I was born in Canada and received my Social Security card in California, where I was an adorable, tousle-headed, green-card-toting tot.

    Fortunately I am now a dual citizen so I can A) vote on 11/4 and B) flee for my home and native land on 11/5 if the Worst Should Happen.

  • Lazy Media

    [re=129324]persiflage[/re]: Ah, grasshopper, let me introduce you to a piece of technology called a daisy-wheel printer, combined with carbon paper. Actually, my SAT scores look like they were printed on a manual typewriter with a sticky shift key. Things didn’t line up so well back then on a regular basis.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=129317]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Yea, but given these scores, Sarah doesn’t even qualify as a half-wit. A quarter-wit is more her speed.

  • user-of-owls

    Anybody want in on a pool to see if the Dow loses more today than her combined score?

  • shortsshortsshorts

    Your next Veep scored an 841 on her SAT? If any of you scored less than an 850 on your SAT please raise your hand and be executed.

  • JadedDIssonance

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: Yeah, the “area identifier” was merely referring to the zipcode of the requestor that the SSN office sent the card to. Still, even though it is a fake, it’s good to figure out how to fake a social too. Aren’t there some poorly released tax-returns we can compare this to?

  • sezme

    The B in English was Alaskan English. The D in Foreign Language was American English.

  • CivicHoliday

    Sad. Just…sad.

  • evan

    fake. just.. fake. :)

    (for the love god.. let it be a fake)

  • JoeFannyPack

    You fools!! Palin forged this to INCREASE her actual score. She copied this from the top student in her high school class. Isn’t this obvious?!!

  • slappypaddy

    Smart enough for a local sportscaster who blows a mean flute.

  • DoctorCulturae

    We’ve been living in the Age of the Revenge of the Nerds. Perhaps after this Sad Leveling we’ll come into the Age of Mr. Smartypants,

  • Tommy Says Soooo

    This is obviously a forgery. Mooselini would have spelled her own name wrong.

  • StrangelyBrown

    [re=129336]NoStyleHere[/re]: I wouldn’t feel too safe in Canada — it’s still within the fallout radius!

  • user-of-owls

    [re=129343]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Stay away from one of her rallies…there are limits on how much ammunition you can buy.

  • 2druk2phluq

    This has got to be a hoax. If it’s not, do we ever really need to provide more proof of a shadow government? This wouldn’t be a conspiracy theory. This has moved beyond that, into conspiracy law.
    Manchurian Candidate be damned. We’ve got the Manchurian cheerleader. “Fire hot, Sarah. Burns.” I finally understand. This is how she’s able to communicate with the crowds at their rallies. They all speak the same language: Dumbspeak.

    This ties in nicely with primate studies of Republicans. You’d think she would have hooked up with Barry, the alpha male of the campaign. With this as evidence of her intellect it becomes obvious why she didn’t. She’s so stupid she thinks Walnuts is the alpha male. I’m surprised she and the pasty one don’t groom each other on stage. “Hold still, Sarah. You’ve got a flea right there on your… I got it.” [chomp chomp] “Your fleas is tastes good.”

  • user-of-owls

    Few of your percentiles are belong to her.

  • Terry


    My SSN has a similar first three numbers and it was issued in Maryland when I was ten yrs old or so. The office was a new one and was issuing that set of numbers rather than the lower ones customary for the State. This actually had a benefit when I was in college at University of Maryland. You’d have to pick up various print outs or forms related to registration down at the Armory and the lines were always arranged by SSN. The crowd would be in lines for numbers starting in the 200’s. Up in the 500’s, I could walk right up to the counter. Small thing, yes, but pretty pleasing at the time.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=129359]user-of-owls[/re]: Further, if anybody here received a 2.2 GPA in high school WITHOUT being a rebel pot-smoking cool-person, please raise your hands to be executed.

  • NoStyleHere

    [re=129358]StrangelyBrown[/re]: Yeah… with the TSX dropping like a stone and Stephen Harper still at the tiller, these are sad days indeed. But at least I have the option of being a snow-bo instead of a hobo. Cold-weather boots are more nutritious in soup!

  • mc_frontalot

    [re=129336]NoStyleHere[/re]: Are you offering convenience marriages for the less fortunate of birth?

    Also, back when I was getting this kind of score attached to my permanent record (about ten years later than Gov Palin was), math & verbal were scored only as multiples of ten. When did it change? Or is this that shoddy of a pretend document?

  • Cogito Ergo Bibo

    [re=129368]mc_frontalot[/re]: I took it the year before Palin and my scores didn’t end in 0. That’s all I can tell you.

  • More Dirt Please

    I once forged report cards on an Apple IIe, back when there was only one font to choose from. It took me about eleven minutes to reproduce the school’s format. However, I increased the grade values for *other* students. Because I wanted to be popular.

    Clearly Smear-uh does not have the wattage to fake one for herself. Oh, wait, all those kids. Never mind.

  • WadISay

    2.2 really is a bad GPA, considering 1.0 of it was probably earned by doing her teachers.

  • Waveos

    They have schools in Alaska? In Wasilla, too? Really? Oh.

  • user-of-owls

    [re=129366]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Again, unless you have a Big Bill’s Barn o’ Bullets nearby, stay clear of the Palin Jugend jamborees…and the South, for that matter.

  • rambone

    Yeah, I agree with everyone who says this one is fake. SAT’s used to end in zeros back then (do they still?).

    A correction should be posted before Wonkette’s standing as the preeminent political news source of past, present and future generations is threatened.

  • Lazy Media

    Todd to Sarah: I can’t believe you like money, too. We should hang out.

  • Jebediah

    Maybe she used her MAVERICK debate tactics while taking the tests.

    “I may not answer the questions that the ETS wants to hear, but I’m going to talk straight to the American people- in words composed of only the letters A, B, C, D, and E”

  • Crapola

    Zack Morris scored a 1502 in the early ’90s. And they would never lie!!!

  • grendel

    You know, thinking back, I took the SAT in 6th grade and got over 200 points better than this… I can haz VP spot?

  • Not_So_Much

    [re=129257]gjdodger[/re]: No, she’s not white. She’s Alaskan! Big difference, which is how you can tell this is a fake.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=129379]rambone[/re]: If Barry has to deal with the fabricated bullshit that the MAVERICK is coming up with to smear him, this report card should be on the cover of every fucking newspaper on the planet.

  • Itsjustme

    [re=129310]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Or human!

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=129376]Waveos[/re]: Yup. They’re called meth labs.

  • S.Luggo

    Getting anything above the SAT minumum verbal score (which I believe back then was 350) is, in my mind, entering elitist territory, you betcha.

  • Lazy Media

    Meh, it appears to be packaged together with an obviously fake IQ test score (according to nerds who did pixel-by-pixel analysis of anachronistic fonts and bell curves). So prolly fake.


    I still doubt she cracked 1,000 on the SAT.

  • Not_So_Much

    [re=129366]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: My senior year was 2.2ish.

    But, given the roughly 7 hours during the school day that I spent at the park alternately rolling doobies on the underside of a frisbee, and then throwing said frisbee (and smoking said doobie), I thought that gpa was pretty fucking miraculous.

  • Lemming Caution

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: actually, the first 3 numbers are just the state of issue – my ss# first three numbers identify the state where I got the card, not the state where I was born (I checked a website that ids the first three digits). When did she move to Alaska?

  • larz

    The irony of her best subject being “biological science” – unless that means “unprotected sex” in Alaska.

  • soggybottomboy



  • Robbertjan

    for those of us not american: I understand this score is low but what is average and what is good?

  • larz


    Her best language is actually “Moose” closely followed by “Sled Dog.”

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=129401]Not_So_Much[/re]: The first two years of High School were pretty much the same way on this end as well, but Sarah was a MAVERICK BULL DOG anti-drug type who has probably never seen a Frisbee in her life. This is what makes it all the worse.

  • MC_Bob


    Yeah, but way back then, kids didn’t get always their Socials when they were born.

    I’m one year older than Mrs. Palin, I didn’t get my SSN until I was 14 or 15.

    Mrs. Palin moved to Alaska when she was 8 or so, I think?

  • Miller

    Looking at her, I always suspected Palin had 34 C’s. Perhaps even double D’s. But her transcripts confirmed my earlier suspicions.


  • DangerousLiberal

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: I can attest that folks who got their SSNs in Alaska have numbers starting with 574–my sister and I both do. I didn’t get an SSN until I was 13 and my sister was 11. It’s not like today where they issue you one as they cut the cord. So I’m thinking it’s legit.

    I got better scores than this and I was stoned to the bone….my sis was drunk (or just hung over). Hey, we were in Alaska, exercisin’ our privacy rights.

    Just to be clear, SSN means social security number. It’s dangerous to use the term SS near Sarah Palin, considering recent “ralles” in Bavar….I mean, in Ohio.

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    She’s not a Veteran? Does McCain realize this? Is he willing to leave the country to someone so unqualified?

  • edgydrifter

    Haysoos Fucking Christmas, I took the SAT as a junior–still DRUNK from a kegger the night before–and beat her score by more than 50%. Obviously, I am the Most Qualified Person in this election cycle.

    I for one welcome myself as your new drunken overlord.

  • Cogito Ergo Bibo

    From Slate – http://www.slate.com/id/73787/

    Bill Bradley, the thinking presidential candidate, scored a 485 verbal on his SAT? That’s lower than George W. Bush, the allegedly slow-witted presidential candidate. As reported recently in The New Yorker, Bush got an SAT verbal score of 566.

    IF this were accurate, it actually makes Bush look like a genius.

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=129413]Robbertjan[/re]: they have changed the scoring a lot. Back when I took it (mid-80s), this score was awful. It was out of 800 for math and 800 for verbal, so perfect was 1600. 1100-1200 was average, generally.

  • ProgHead777

    [re=129380]Lazy Media[/re]: Haha! The idiocracy is upon us! 500 years my ass. Sarah Elizondo Mountain Dew Heath Palin will fix our our broken ecomony and make our crops grow because she gots what plants crave… she gots electrolytes. Hahahaha… ehhh…

    …actually, I don’t think I’ll ever laugh at that movie again.

  • Robbertjan

    [re=129432]Doglessliberal[/re]: Thanks. Now I don’t think Bible spice is much of a genius but this score is so beyond reason, I doubt it’s real. Then again…

  • Lazy Media


    The test is designed so that 1000 is the median score (half score more, half less). 1200 is generally considered a good score, 800 not so much. Less than half the kids in America take this test; it’s intended for those going to college, so the median SAT score likely means being above average for all kids in America.

    So, an 840 in 1982 means Sarah Palin was better academically, probably, than about 60 percent of the country. The downside is, do you want a vp who is dumber than 40 percent of the country?

    However, SAT scores do not predict financial/career achievement all that well. I would imagine the average Wonkette score is > 1300, and look at these losers. I had a 1530 back when that meant something, and I’m a fuckup, so judge accordingly.

  • AxmxZ


  • Johnny Zhivago

    Funny SAT story… The second time I took it (I think you took it twice and kept the best result or something), I was finished first in the class. I took it up to the “proctor” or whatever, who was a Franciscan brother in training (not a full teacher, and yes this was when I was still a Catholic). He moronically told me I could take the question booklet home.

    I arrived home, after a 45 minute subway ride, on a Saturday evening around 6pm and my mother greeted me with the news that the Principal had called multiple time, frantically and I had to get the question book back to school IMMEDIATELY.

    There was a lot of finger pointing, and red faces, and it seemed as if it were some massive security breech that had been averted.

    I really regretted not photocopying the freaking thing, but the library was closed and this was before the days of home photocopiers.

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=129323]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: I didn’t do so well on the SATs, despite having an excellent grade point average. But even I did better than a 425 in English.

  • dave666

    Unfortunately, it’s probably a fake. 574 is the SS area number for someone born in Alaska. The Lipstick Pig was born in Idaho. The scores do seem right though!

    back then, we usually didnt get SS numbers till our teenage years or so. , not at birth, like now.

  • J05H

    [re=129254]Sussemilch[/re]: Sometimes you miss that critical question – say by putting “Amanda” on your entry form and “Mandy” on the actual test. Mandy was maybe the dumbest girl in my high school, lost 200 points for that mistake and still came in with SAT better than Palin’s score.

  • Johnny Zhivago

    [re=129474]dave666[/re]: I am pretty sure Area # is the office APPLIED in, not born in.

  • Not_So_Much

    [re=129417]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: And a barracuda. Always to be sure to give her full credit for all her aggressive, animal nicknames. This is God’s will.

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=129452]Robbertjan[/re]: I knew people who got 400s, but they were illiterate or took it on acid.

  • Lazy Media

    [re=129441]ProgHead777[/re]: Transcript from the second VP debate:

    Palin: Well, don’t want to sound like a dick or nothin’, but, ah… you’re fucked up. Ah, you talk like a fag, and your shit’s all retarded. What I’d do, is just like… like… you know, like, you know what I mean, like…

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=129467]Lazy Media[/re]: the percentile shown on the score card is 39%.

  • arksi

    Obviously whoever created this was too young to remember Rathergate 2004.

  • dave666

    One way to check for authenticity,……………………. Does the percentile actually correspond with the score?

  • V572625694

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: Maybe the SSAN is fake. Don’t forget, in the long ago and far away when Ms Winky was born, not everybody got a SSAN at birth.

  • JoeFannyPack

    The Soc Sec number is correct. Politico.com had these same 5 digits on their site last month. It had been obtained from some ‘opposition research’ file put together for Palin.

  • Lazy Media

    [re=129499]Doglessliberal[/re]: That’s 39 percent of those (including non-college-bound) taking the test. They don’t, uh, actually know the scores of those NOT taking the test.

    One could assume they would be lower. If we want to be generous toward the 2/3 of the high school exiters who didn’t take the test in ’81, we’ll say Sarah’s barely in the top 50 percent.

  • mikey mike

    Don’t all SAT scores end in 0? Or is that something that only came into play in the past decade or something?

    Regardless if this is fake or not, this lady is fucking dumb.

  • edgydrifter

    [re=129467]Lazy Media[/re]: “I would imagine the average Wonkette score is > 1300, and look at these losers.”

    Thank you for your succinct and depressingly accurate summary of my life-path. Me go drinky soon.

  • S.Luggo

    [re=129297]Gopherit v2.0[/re]: (Rim shot.)

  • scarface1950

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: not really. used to be you didn t automatically get a ss# at birth. you usually went and got one when you were 16 or so so you could bus tables in a restaurant for $1.05/hr, no tips. so her ss# could be alaskan anyway.

  • larz

    The right is so anxious to read Obama’s thesis. I want to ready Palin’s Television Journalism 101 paper – “Bangs or No Bangs? The Impact of Hair in Modern Journalism”

  • BigDupa

    Did Dan Rather find this document? Just checking.

  • Churchill

    She was slightly below average in verbal, 35 vs nat’l ave of 39, but she was much below average in Math, 31 vs 38 nat’l ave.
    She is definitely a c minus student.

  • Churchill

    Another C minus Student. This nation can’t handle another one of those!!!

  • S.Luggo

    [re=129413]Robbertjan[/re]: Because you’re not an American, I must believe that you therefore wish to destroy our freedoms (e.g.: the freedom to become a beggar and to drink rainwater from the streets) and thus I should not communicate with you.

    Average SAT scores http://s.buzzfeed.com/static/imagebuzz/web02/2008/10/9/21/4ba5d2089271a6fb737ff16b68b5fa53.jpg

  • Churchill

    Another C Minus Student

  • S.Luggo

    [re=129422]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Strictly speaking, in Wasilla you can’t be considered a ‘verteran’ until you’ve turned your 50th trick.

  • Mleecher

    [re=129270]WikipediaBrown[/re]: Doesn’t mean she didn’t get her SS# in AK. Mine starts with FL numbers but I was born in ME. My parents were filthy liberal hippie hobos living out of the back of a pick up truck converted into a “house” type thing. They bucked the system until it was time for my Dad to finish college and I needed an SS# so they could get food stamps.

  • heronimule

    Do you really report your grades like that? I don’t remember that being an option. From what I’ve heard she received decent grades, so I’m leaning toward FAKE! I wouldn’t be surprised though if she did bomb the SAT. If only race baiting was on the test…

    P.S.- I love the people who are reporting their SAT scores here. How long does it take you to drop the alma mater in a conversation?

  • Gopherit v2.0

    [re=129582]S.Luggo[/re]: Yeah, probably.

  • echoroc

    [re=129380]Lazy Media[/re]: GO ‘WAY. ‘BATIN.

  • PigeonPoop

    HAA!, She graduated the year after I did, no wonder I’m so stupid.

  • estrangiero


    . . .actually I don’t think so. 574 (like mine) just means you were issued one in AK. This looks bonafide to me, if the Palin “Truth Squad/Gestapo” doesn’t respond to it in 48 hours I say its genuine.

  • somervillain

    Sorry, this doesn’t pass the smell test.

    1. The printing on that document looks like someone created that in a graphics program. Way too dark, also.

    2. Her grades read like someone would guess they would read. Especially the D in foreign language.

    3. Most importantly, I seriously doubt Sarah Palin has taken the SAT. She was from Alaska, and back in the day the Midwest and western US was ACT country. The only way she was going to take the SAT was if she was were applying to a high-profile school, and judging from her college sojourns, that wasn’t the case.

  • elSantos

    [re=129441]ProgHead777[/re]: I have written a few comments (and replies) with references to Idiocracy. I propose the formation of a caucus that will seek to elevate the profile of this cultural touchstone within the Wonkette community.

    I am now convinced that Idiocracy is not a movie but a docudrama.

    Long live president Camacho!

  • edgydrifter

    [re=129640]heronimule[/re]: Don’t be hatin’ just because you’re jealous of my generic state university education. Generic State rules!

  • Vewol Mevemont

    Likely a forgery. But it’s worth noting that these scores are in line with average scores for her first college (Hawaii Pacific). http://www.collegeprofiles.com/hawaiipacific.htm. Assuming these aren’t real, I doubt the real ones are much better, if at all.

  • JSDC007

    All this proves is that Sarah’s better at speakin’ and writin’ than she is at math.

    And in a national financial crisis, if that doesn’t scare you, nothing would.

  • Vewol Mevemont

    Oops. That’s html, not htm.

  • scarface1950

    part time hours worked less than 6. that s what i call part time.

  • d4g33z

    [re=129385]grendel[/re]: Haha. Another victim of the “Test For Academic Precocity”.

  • gliberal

    Obvious forgery. Math and verbal scores missing decimal place.

  • HuskyMescan

    It’s obviously a fake since Ethnic group says “White” instead of “White Trash”. Duh.

  • ShortShadey

    [re=129316]azw88[/re]: It may not be true, but it’s truthy! Sure, what the hell – run with it.

  • DangerousLiberal

    [re=129737]somervillain[/re]: Nope. I took the SAT. Almost all my classmates took the SAT. In Anchorage (1980). The only kids who took the ACT were the ones who wanted to go to Midwest schools (that is, to go back to the Old Country: Wisconsin and Minnesota).

  • S.Luggo

    [re=129810]gliberal[/re]: “Decimal point”? We now get who U R. Knowing 5th grade arithmetic puts you in the center of the Elitist camp. Go back to your fancy Fransitan and sip your friggin’ white wine.

  • S.Luggo

    [re=129737]somervillain[/re]: “Way too dark, also.” Heh. Is that an Obama joke?
    — J6pk

  • Gormogon

    This would have been like a 1070 or so after they dumbed it down in 1995, and more like 1200 when they dumbed it down again in 2005.

  • alex encandar

    Actually Gormogon, since they raised the total points of the SAT to 2400 (from 1600)in 2005, I think your claim that she would have 1200 hurts your cause.

    A 1200 is roughly the equivalent of an 800 when she took it.

  • A. J. Ayer

    5 years of English in high school. What a scholar!

  • MorallyBankrupt

    Ok this is most definitely fake, although probably comes pretty close to the real thing. I’m in my 20s, so I don’t know if things were different when Palin was in high school, but SAT scores are always rounded to the tens place, so it would be impossible to receive a 425 verbal and 416 math…correct me if I’m wrong.

  • Dave S.

    It’s a fake, you credulous morons. Go here:


    Gosh, but you’re all so much smarter than dummy Palin.

  • Dave S.

    “I believe virtually everything I read, and I think that is what makes me more of a selective human than someone who doesn’t believe anything.”

    – David St. Hubbins, with the Nutroots motto.

  • Dr. Spaceman

    [re=130633]Dave S.[/re]: Thanks Dave S., I didn’t see the words “alleged” and “probably fake” in the text, nor did I see 150-odd posts best summarized as “fake, but probably close to the truth.”
    You are a leader among men.

  • TruthBeTold

    Wow, what a bunch of gullible, easily persaudable, will believe anything that feeds your prejudices, spoon fed the storyline created by the media, pudding for brains people post here.

  • nestegg46

    Social Security numbers issued in Alaska are 574. There was no reason for Sarah’s family to apply for a social security number until the late 1970’s when we needed one to apply for our Permanent Fund dividend. These scores do not surprise me. No one EVER said Sarah was intelligent but the poor girl does her best. Somehow this is a very sad day for our country with the state of our economy.


  • TruthBeTold

    Uhmm…Nestegg it’s fake, provenly fake, no question about it fake. Don’t believe what you read here or anywhere else that posted this without doing plenty of your own research because obviously these people don’t do any, and yes plenty of people including her past teachers say she’s smart. She was an honor student. It’s just the media storyline to say she’s not, just as they have done to others. If you just believe the media you’d have thought Kerry was smarter than Bush, which is not true if you actually go find out. They think the only smart people there are went to Ivy League schools and the rest of America is idiots. Stop being so easily manipulated and lead…Break into her email to find nothing incriminating, post fake sat scores, but follow the storyline set for her from the start even if you have to lie to do it.

  • Dave S.

    “Thanks Dave S., I didn’t see the words “alleged” and “probably fake” in the text, nor did I see 150-odd posts best summarized as “fake, but probably close to the truth.”
    You are a leader among men.”

    Ah, I see – the ol’ “hey, it could be true, so whatever” ploy. Such truthiness! You should all be so proud.

    Well, Obama was raised a Muslim, so it’s been alleged that he secretly sympathizes with Muslim extremists. I think that’s PROBABLY not true, but could conceivably be close to the truth.

    Hey, this is fun! I wish I could post that picture of him dressed in the robes to go with this completely unfounded crap. Or better yet, maybe someone could photoshop his head onto Osama bin Laden’s body, with the AK-47 in the background and everything, so I could say, “Hey, it’s probably a fake, but still…”, just like you classy truthers.

  • Dave S.

    And could one of you geniuses explain how being an honor student equates with “probably dumb”? Or do you just assume that middle-class people who do declasse things like hunt and fish must be Neanderthals?

  • recoveringgradstudent

    Couple of things: why would she be taking the SAT when she was already 18, in the second semester of her senior year (test date is allegedly 1982)? And someone posted that scores always ended in a zero, which is also correct. Whoever the hoaxer was must have thought that a number like 425 seemed more specific and thus more believable. I know people have described her as “smart”–I’m willing to believe that she has some kind of savvy, but she strikes me as undereducated and no genius.

  • Wonkette_Is_Unethical_Retard

    Dumbass. Unethical F*cktard. You want so badly for your biases to be true that you don’t really give a crap about truth, justice, ethics, fairness, or journalistic standards. You try to show that Palin is stupid, but reveal your own lack of intellect. Did you take the SAT’s? Did you think it was just a coincidink that you and all your friends had grades that were multiples of 10? You are so sure of the superiority of your ideas that you think all your opponents are stupid. Well, look in the mirror, schmuck.