Wonkette
Oh this is hilarious, on CNN we have a split screen with Barry finally laying out his detailed, comprehensive policy proposal on the left, and on the right we have a bunch of sad orange roses waiting for George Bush to stomp all over them.
Oh hey here he is! George Bush, hunched and tired, standing in the shade, a hollow wind whistling over his microphone, while in Ohio Barack Obama stands in the sunlight surrounded by adoring crowds telling them how American ingenuity will triumph.
So:
10:26 AM — “Lack the capital or the competency in each other to make loans,” or something like that. Uncertainty leads to understandable anxiety, which makes for more anxiety.
10:27 AM — Strategy, tools, steps.
10:28 AM — So far he has explained why everything sucks, and told people not to freak out too much about everything sucking.
10:29 AM — A bit of railing against short sellers.
10:30 AM — He just sort of shrugs, hopelessly. What can he really say? He could read the same speech Barack Obama is giving right at this moment and people like your Wonkette editor would say, “Ugh, this guy is so full of shit.”
10:32 AM — The president reviews the roster of people working on the financial problem. Obviously this whole thing would be solved if they got David Petraeus to work on it.
10:34 AM — So, did he say anything new here? No news? Didn’t sound like news.
And then of course he flees immediately.
I think he said “confidency”–a Bushism for sure.
His hair’s thinning.
Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate… leads to suffering.
Did a wonkette Blingee artist add the pattern on that tie in the pic?
Please, for the love of God, George SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET THE FUCK OFF THE AIR. You are NOT HELPING YOU USELESS PRICK!
Right now you’re about as useful as a pair of testicles on a beach ball.
Bush should be used to dealing with financial failure by now, thanks to Arbusto and Harken Energy.
About the only thing he hasn’t done is trade Michael Phelps to the Chinese for some them “Chicken Balls” and General Tso’s Chicken.
I WILL freak out, so George and his pals will be broke like me. Like me.
Does anyone -even conservatives–believe a word he says anymore?
He has the same dim, priviledged look of McCain…am i good ’nuff daddy?
Ew…La Prezint is talking. Do I hear a crow in the background? Nice day in the Rose garden..fer now.
That Blingee is understated and classy.
Bush starts talking DOW starts dropping again.
Does anyone really think this will help anything?
When did Paulson become “Hank” anyway?
As usual no questions. What a surprise! What a fuckup. What a worthless piece of human garbage.
STOP TALKING, SHIT SHIT
It was back up, so only down 144, and he opened his moran mouth, and it is back down almost 200 now. Arghhhhh.
OH god let him have to struggle in some way PLEAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE
The term Lame Duck was invented for this guy.
There he goes…wait. Come back!!
Serolf Divad:
Haha. Are you from the south? That’s totally the kind of expressions southerners use on a daily basis. It’s endearing/mystifying.
As soon as he’s done speaking the Dow will EXPLODE!
He’s got the soothing touch of a sledgehammer.
Serolf Divad: jinx, but you said it much better
Republican creed: Your God will help you with the poverty we create.
Helluva job.
Bush’s idea of a fireside chat is “Burn the motherfucker down!”
Poor Georgie is just hoping for a terrorist comet to rain down death and destruction worldwide so that he won’t be remembered for his legacy, which is the equivalent of a rancid bag of dicks.
Botswana Meat Commission FC:
While I live in Baltimore, the American (AKA: non-terrorist) half of my family hails from South Carolina.
That was a whole lot of words to basically say “I got nuthin’.”
Again, there go the speeches to “replenish the ole’ coffers, heh heh”..only bright spot I can find…
Waveos: Probably a vulture.
Hopey event in Chillocothe, OH if you’d rather see something uplifting for a change. CNN live stream.
That’s it, George? That’s all you got??? WTF? This is our “LEADER?”
Brighter note…Obama just doubled in the polls.
Everyone go shopping.
Speaking of hate…
The McCain campaign knows it can’t win no matter what, so they’re trying a different approach.
Incite violence and trigger a psychopath to do bad things to Barry:
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1008/14445.html
one paste eater: “Get him. He’s bad for our country.”
He is reading his notes whenever he has to actually talk economics. He is less convincing than Caribou Barbie.
Enturbulator:
With what? Money? Hahahaha. At this point, Cans of Baked Beans is the new green back or fat back.
10:26 AM — We’re all screwed.
10:27 AM — This is what we’re not doing about it.
10:28 AM — We’re all screwed. But don’t panic.
10:29 AM — It’s someone else’s fault.
10:30 AM — Meh.
10:32 AM — Back to a nice scotch and some pretzels.
Heckeva a job Bushy
I actually think he’s starting to realize what a colossal fuck up his entire adult life has been. And weirdly, this makes me sad.
Anyway, did he do any promotional stuff for “W” before leaving the podium?
ProfessorJukes:
Should have winked.
Waveos: Exactly. I would have felt so much better and it’s so much easier to pay my bills if he’d of said “Doncha know” and “You betcha.” Mission decomplished: free fallin’.
Poor George. At long last, his silver-tongued communication skills have failed him.
Serolf Divad: Or a truck…TRUCK NUTZ
TGY:
Agreed: he should have figured out a way to slip in the word: “nukuler.”
Poor Smirky Monkey. He spends two weeks huddled under the buck-stopping desk in the Oval Office, guzzling from his bottle of Laura Librarian Sour Mash, then finally screws the cap back on long enough to screw up his courage and come out to tell us we’re all screwed. As if we didn’t know.
I dreamed last night I was falling. When I woke up, I was still falling. When Black Friday comes…
Serolf Divad: I fled South Carolina for many years, but pull of geography was too great. I am back in the dysfunctional land of my birth. So, Serolf, I feel your pain.
Serolf Divad: watch it there…that’s how my wife describes me, at times….and I’d rather not be associated with Bush; if you know what I mean…
Serolf Divad: both the useless prick and the beach ball thing…
magic titty: If only. No, W will never grasp the Epic Fail proportions of the calamity that has been his preznitcy. Remember, he believes god is telling him what to do. Ugh.
I swear Bush looks hung over. Is he back on the sauce?
queeraselvis v 2.0: WIN
Well, the market looks like shit, but I have to admit that this chart makes me feel better:
http://www.pollster.com/polls/us/08-us-pres-ge-mvoand3s.php
Yahoo is saying that Palin is related to Princess Di and Roosevelt, 10th and 9th cousins respectively. That is all
I always feel so warm after seeing our president in action, largely because I shit in my chair.
I propose that every animated GIF of Bush now be 3 seconds of a straight portrait followed by the scene of Slim Picking Riding the nuke into oblivion from Dr. Strangelove. Any artistic types out there who can help out?
Terry: He’s been slurring his words for months. I’d say this morning he’s around half through a bottle of Wild Turkey.
Seriously, this clown needs to STFUand GTFO. Where’s the real President? Where is Barry? Everyone knows he’s 44. Dems know it, Reps know it, rednecks know it, libruls know it. Let Barry come out, with Paul Volcker at his side, and say something.
StripesAndPlaids:
I will say this… Hunting Island is pretty fucking cool. Great wide-open wild beach, nice campgrounds and hiking trails, etc.
Too bad the typical South Carolinian idea of camping = golf cart, huge generator, ridiculously huge pickup truck with harley stickers everywhere, dingey camper/pop-up festooned with wal-mart plastic “tiki” lights, kids everywhere wearing only diapers, etc.
AxmxZ: Maybe the supreme court can just appoint Barry like they did with W.
8 years of fail has taught me to change channels when this colossal knucklehead appears on television to open his mouth. Even if Barry was a terrorist, he would be hard pressed to cause more damage.
On a side note, yahoo says that a shark in South Carolina had a virgin birth. I thing the shark god is sending us all a sign.
He soothes with his consistent idiocy.
Nomura has bought a chunk of Lehman, Mitsubishi/UFJ has bought a chunk of Morgan Stanley, which means Lou Dobbs will be frothing about the Japanese for a coupla years. “American workers, being forced to show up at their offices at 8AM…It’s just an outrage!”
Why can’t “that one” admit that the stock market crash worked?
Enturbulator: Oooh does this mean he’ll start questioning the intentions of his maker? “If God told me to do xyz, and everything immediately burned to the ground…what does that mean?”
Eh. Probably not.
Cape Clod: Maybe the Jeebus shark should tell Paulson how to fix this mess.
Oh, and he said that he’s forming a Transition Council for the next administration. I guess that’s Texan for showing the porch monkey the ropes. Asshole. The only “transition” should be a size 14 Vibram sole to his boney ass.
I’d rather have Billy Mays bellowing at me than see that moran again.
STAY IN YR SPIDER HOLE!
AxmxZ: This may be so, but may the force be with us if this is the beginning of a “transition.” Srsly, this could be rough: the Repubsnits are going to be as defensive as a snarling pit bull on it’s way to the vet. I have more teh fearsomeness about transfer of power than I even do about teh ‘lection. After all that’s happened does anyone really believe this will be seamless?
sailingthestyx:
It’s beautiful country, and I love to visit when I can, but my mother went back to visit friends recently and reported just how dismayed she was by the casual racism and excitement over Sarah Palin that she observed at cocktail parties. And these aren’t trailer dwellers. These are educated professionals from “good” families.
I wonder when Bin Laden will be phoning George to congratulate him on his work:
“You know dude, I’ve been trying to destroy America for decades, and you managed to do it in a few short years. Respect.”
From which part of sunny Paraguay was the speech given? We must know if the Hellfire missiles are to be effective.
I am playing FDR’s first inaugural address (http://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/fdrfirstinaugural.html). It is very reassuring.
Tell me Bushie could do any better that this idiot:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrnVNZpnvRI
There once was a man named George
Whose Presidential credentials were forged
One a month he’d appear
To sow hatred and fear
‘Til Obama evicted the scourge
ihasasad: Must be the retarded redneck side of the family
Speaking of Short Sellin’ , did anyone ever figure out who was short selling all that airline stock on 09/07/01 ?
And whomever collected the proceeds?
Servo: That’s probably the only reason he’s on the air today. Poppy probably woke him from a blissful slumber saying something about everyone in Kennebunkport losing their ass.
And yes, everytime he says something, it’s a guarenteed 1000 point slide. We’ll be at 7000 by the end of the day.
http://www.everclearonline.com/
ahhhhhhhh
round up a few of those short sellers and throw them to the crowd at the next palin rally … just to whet their bloodlust …
DoctorCulturae: Did you ever read Dune or watch the movie? You know when the Atreides take over on Arrakis and have to have people going through the whole house looking for Harkonnen traps and spies? Yeah like that…
God, I’m a dork…
A piece of paper that President Bush signed Thursday helps ease his way out of the White House when his term ends and clears the way for his successor.
For seven years and nearly nine months has signed virtually every memo or order or piece of legislation imaginable. He even vetoed a few bills, but the directive he put his name on Thursday was one that few talk very much about. Basically, it’s the executive order that turns the keys to the White House over to whomever is elected president on Nov. 4. [americablog]
Whew!!
DoctorCulturae: Considering that the Bush Administration used a signing statement to place partisan appointments in every executive department…. there is going to be endless amounts of shit to root out.
The cleanup from this administration is going to be INSANE. Just for one, think about all the Republicans who were in favor of taking all of the Nation’s intelligence agencies and rolling them up under one umbrella and handing the keys directly to the President — you think they’re going to love having their beautiful machine handed over to a Chicago liberal?
Botswana Meat Commission FC: You left out the “W” sticker on the back of the gas-guzzling SUV.
So he spoke for 10 minutes and said nothing. At what point does he just start coming out and just start doing a little softshoe, or maybe a few inept magic tricks?
Day-umn. These Nazi rallies are getting worse by the day. Listening to Walnuts in Wisconsin, right now. So much booing and name calling. Nothing like Hopey’s cheering and optimism. If he lobs the Ayers bomb, this crowd is likely to go nuk-u-lar.
FOUR MORE YEARS!!
FOUR MORE YEARS!!
FOUR MORE YEARS!!
Enturbulator: Haha, i call him the oxymoran
Norbert: I’d vote for him over McCain/Palin in negative 4 seconds. And there aren’t many people I loathe more than GWB. They just happen to be two of them.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: What re you watching? CSPAN?
I hope Obama wipes the Big Chair with a white handkerchief right in front of George and Laura.
Botswana Meat Commission FC: You will get no argument from me about problems with SC. There are many. But there are also some very smart, very progressive people here. Our Governor is a joke, but the great thing about being a Sandlapper: Hope for better days.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUJthXiK3V4
ihasasad: yup also the lawn guy down the street.
btw, my investment advice - triple a municipal bonds. even if equities increase at 12% a year and inflation is at 10% it will be awhile before it will get to an equivalent 14000 in the future, i think.
special note to annie and shortchanged: ,,,,,,.
New McCain spot: “Bind Ambition” (Barry’s associate with William Ayers caused the housing market debacle) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9JNna5EmJg
Cogito Ergo Bibo: I heard that too. Very scary shit.
That pathetic man will die without ever taking responsibility for any of the suffering he has caused. I despise him beyond words…
Gopherit v2.0: Weird. Apologies if this is a double post. My computer just had a senior moment. The speech was on CNN live stream. It’s over now. No fireworks. I didn’t hear him mention Ayers. I did only catch the middle and end of his speech, though.
“There is nothing we can do, its the wrath of Allah.” Did he really say that?
Enturbulator: woo hoo McKinney!!!
Jebediah:
if you don’t laugh at the video of Billy Mays falling into the bathtub, you have issues.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SabRvYb0eE&NR=1
StripesAndPlaids: That crowd just sounded about 3 seconds away from becoming a lynch mob.
McCorpse’s campaign shall now be called The Kitchen Sink.
DoctorCulturae: they really think all this stuff will work. the magic doesn’t, and even wins more to Obama and they cannot believe it. hysteria follows. not the funny kind. that they are in the minority becomes terrifying.
njdon: ignore my bad advice.
grendel: she has a side that isn’t?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Where in Wisconsin? I know this state pretty well.
Wow. I’m half-watching his speech. He hasn’t looked this scared since 9/11.
Pardon me while I visit my local gun dealer.
Did anyone see just now on MSNBC what Putin got for his birthday? He got a fucking baby tiger,hes giving it to a zoo.
My favorite part of course was his guarantee that the FDIC has everyone covered up to $250, so it’s not like the collapse of a bank or two is going to hurt us.
And when they all go, doofus?
StripesAndPlaids: “And from a purely practical political vantage point, please find me a swing voter, an undecided independent, or a torn female voter that finds an angry mob mentality attractive.” - John Weaver, John McCain’s former top strategist
Man, McCain is doing EVERYTHING right. Talking about Ayers and planetariums when everyone is worrying about surviving the winter, campaigning in Minnesota and Wisconsin, leading fascist rallies… McCain is the Mole. XD
I’m pretty sure he knows he fucked the pooch big time. Maybe if there are more Banana Republic comparisons like the Hitchens piece someone in the WH will snap and slap his smug mug while he totters around in an incomprehending stupor.
Worlds End: OMG, that baby tiger is so freaking cute. And pettable. :)))
ihasasad: Princess Di and the Roosevelts have a side of their family that isn’t retarded rednecks, yes…
Sussemilch: It was in LaCrosse, WI. When Grampy was asking vets to raise their hands to indicate who they were in the crowd, he put his own arm up Hitler-style, over the crowd. I know it’s the injury that keeps him from raising the arm higher, but I still want a screen grab of that.
Worlds End: Next he’ll get a huge tank with sharks… perhaps a monacle… some hot models whom he’ll train in Judo and have around his private island / evil lair.
grendel: Who would have thought we would have missed John Weaver?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Did you read the link i posted about savage riling these people up,saying that Obama basically will start race riot for power.
http://mediamatters.org/items/200810090008?f=h_latest
You now you have idiots threatening to shoot people.
http://rawstory.com/news/afp/US_Secret_Service_probes_death_thre_10092008.html
http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Angry_voter_threatens_Registrar_says_he_1008.html
http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Obama_McCain_riles_crowds_stoking_anger_1010.html
What Bush said: ‘Here is what we have done’
and here is what Bush didn’t say, but was clearly thinking:
“Fuck all of you, fuck the economy! I hate McCain but I will fuck up this economy so bad that there is no way Obama can fix it, thus leading to a Republican landslide”
Years from now when historians debate the beginnings of real socialism in the USA, they will conclude it came, not from the influences of Karl Marx or even populist Ché, but as a reaction of the Republicans of the early 21C led by george Bush and Dick Cheney.
In the same way, people began to shake off their religious shackles because of fundamentalist Christianity. Fundamentalism became the catalyst for change the people could believe in.
Politics and religion - GWB’s legacy.
AxmxZ: He should keep it and raise it to be his guard.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: I am laughing IRL. LaCrosse is a total Democratic stronghold. He’s a complete dumbshit for trying to campaign there. Are his handlers trying to punish him?
festooned
god i love that word
He must hate the economy something fierce to try and degrade confidence even further by implying he will attempt to fix things in his typical Bushie style.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
McCain’s latest cluster-fuck for old people:
Old people should leave their money untouched in their 401K’s past age 70.
Yeah, you old fuckers, quick like using your 401k $$ for your living expenses! How dare you fuck up the economy like that!
Alright. a perfect solution to keep the markets from crashing. Close them all!
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=aP5mpMUORBWM
Serolf Divad: I agree…grew up in northeastern Ohio…woods for as far as the eye can see; two years ago my mother moved from there to Atlanta…has commented that the difference in racism between the north and south had little to do with the level of racism that existed, but rather the level of openness. As you mention, that has changed and bright educated people are spouting some of the most bizarre stuff imaginable. I live on the west coast and some of the emails I receive from back there make my hair stand on end.
Of course, this doesn’t detract from the fact that I am short, round, and worthless…
Serolf Divad: Sounds like somebody’s 401(k) has sprung a leak!
jagorev: WOW! Brilliant!
“Faced by failure of credit they have proposed only the lending of more money.”
“Plenty is at our doorstep, but a generous use of it languishes in the very sight of the supply. Primarily this is because the rulers of the exchange of mankind’s goods have failed, through their own stubbornness and their own incompetence, have admitted their failure, and abdicated. Practices of the unscrupulous money changers stand indicted in the court of public opinion, rejected by the hearts and minds of men.”
Etc.
Oh, how I loathe him.
Why doesn’t he have useful, happy suggestions? Like, “in some towns, geese on golf courses are a nuisance, and the government is going to allow programs to kill them and hand them out for Christmas”.
queeraselvis v 2.0: That’s deeply unfair to rancid bags of dicks.