Wonkette
Dean Reynolds sat down and penned this long angry rant about what a sack of douches the Obama campaign staffers are, while all the McCain people are helpful and informed. This jibes pretty squarely with Wonkette editorial impressions of the parties’ respective conventions, in which a bunch of disorganized know-nothing liberals dedicated themselves to fucking up your day while a demure coterie of courteous, knowledgeable Republicans offered way more attractive press credentials and a bar RIGHT NEXT TO THE CONVENTION ARENA. Republicans secretly love the media, hurrah! But the really important take-home in this screed is buried midway through this interminable thing:
The McCain campaign plane is better than Obama’s, which is cramped, uncomfortable and smells terrible most of the time. Somehow the McCain folks manage to keep their charter clean, even where the press is seated.
So there you go, Obama’s press corps is always peeing on the seats, probably because they aren’t allowed to use the bathroom “for security,” while the McCain press people have personal valets. Dean Reynolds is in the tank. FOR McCAIN, ZING!!!!
Reporter’s Notebook: Seeing How The Other Half Lives [CBS News]
Probably smells like Marlboros.
Cindy McCain slathers on enough Chanel #5 to mask a wide range of smells.
These guys are too much. Suprised he dint venture to say the smell was somehow related to the fried chicken, and chitlins they be servin’
Smells like TERRA!
Of course it smells. Arugula, granola, and organic tea give you raging gas.
I wish Hunter S. Thompson was still around to cover the McCain campaign. Now that would be entertaining.
The Obama plane smells… like victory.
Someday this campaign’s gonna end.
These comments are clearly rascist.
“I like my coffee like I like my men; milky white, sour, and penguinish.”
McCain’s plane smells like mothballs, Ben-Gay and ribbon candy.
He sums up well:
“Maybe none of this means much.”
“But in politics, everything that goes around comes around,” writes Mr. Reynolds. Is this, like, um, a threat?
Obama’s plane smells like effort and success. Maybe Mr. Reynolds doens’t recognize these olfactory cues.
Nobody flies on Obama’s plane anymore — it’s too crowded.
(with apologies, of course, to Yogi).
“Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?”
“Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked?”
“Joey, have you ever been to a Turkish prison?”
and I’m spent.
Gee, are all reporters such whiny little bitches? Did somebody deny him an extra pillow?
dano: Totally. Priceless gold.
Now we find out why Maureen Dowd isn’t allowed on the McCain plane.
The comments on the linked article are better than that stupid guy’s video from the parking lot. Get this:
“It stinks because Obama doesn”t give a rat’’s azz about anybody that doesn”t serve him. He doesn”t even care if your on that plane - he’’s so elite and thinks he’’s “God” and your just a lowly servant!
The real facts are he doesn”t care about any Americans, or Christians for that matter - His faith won”t allow him to care about us - he loathes us - all of us - wake up people - the stink on the airplane is the stench of Marxism, Socialism, Communism, totalitarianism, and elitism!”
dano: Well, we’ve got Ken, who seems to channel Dr Gonzo quite effectively.
Baggage calls are preposterously early with the explanation that it’s all for security reasons.
Ah HA! Someone is cranky because he didn’t get his beauty sleep.
sezme: I’m betting “Red Door,” by Elizabeth Arden. Chanel #5 is WAY too tasteful a fragrance to accompany the satin circus tents Cindy dresses up in.
dano: HST is sorely missed, though Matt Taibbi isn’t bad.
Smells like napalm in the morning.
Smells like victory.
InKnockYouUs: “I suspect there is a feeling within the Obama campaign that the broadcast networks are less influential in the age of the internet and thus needn’t be accomodated as in the days of yore. Even if it’s true, they are only hurting themselves by dissing audiences that run in the tens of millions every night.” Here’s another threat! This guy’s pissed! How dare Obama dismiss the Metamucil/Fixodent demographic?
Not surprising. You need extra filters to keep the smell of presidential Depends out of the air.
“What goes around comes around”? What does he mean, that his reports (and perhaps those of others in the media) are going to be slanted against Obama because of substandard traveling arrangements? Really? Great display of professionalism and ethics there, Mr. Reynolds!
What he probably doesn’t realize is that this is already the “come around” phase: the press’s nose has been so deep in McCain’s ass in the past, that the Obama campaign probably thought “Screw them, don’t clean the plane - they probably can’t smell anything anyway.”
It’s the scent of watermelon & jheri curl activator. Poor Dean was probably too scared Barry the Terrorist would knock him out the plane door to remark on the stained headrests.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Man, I hate those early baggage calls too! Or I would, if I had some peon to schlepp my bag for me, like these elitist MSM whiney-girls.
I don’t know what this jackass is insinuating. Obama is so fresh and so clean (clean). Joe Biden told us so!
Mctesty’s plane probably has to be cleaned everyday after he looks at poll numbers and shits himself of course its gonna smell good, oth i think he should have to identify the smell, watermelon, fried chicken(if fried chicken is it like grammas chicken or shitty chicken like roscoes)mmmmwaffles… and if it smells like watermelon is it like watermelon jolly ranchers or the drink they give you when you have an upper-gi. or does it just smell like musk ox? I mean we all know that muslins smell like cous-cous and falafel(sic) but he didnt mention that. Maybe it just smells like change(and i dont mean the jingly kind, i mean the foldy kind)
One Yield Regular: Or possibly “Just Me” by Paris Hilton.
“But in politics, everything that goes around comes around.”
Doesn’t that sound like a threat? Is this guy gonna be an asshat during White House press conferences WHEN Obama is President?
Or maybe this guy is just PISSED OFF that Obama isn’t sucking up to the press like McCain did for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS!
MoodProcessor: He is a reporter, after all.
I think an appreciation for “Black Love” incense is an acquired thing.
McCain’s plane doesn’t stink because it’s paneled with a special grade of rain forest cedar that absorbs old people smell.
InKnockYouUs: “…the stench of Marxism, Socialism, Communism, totalitarianism, and elitism!” ”
myself, I love the smell of napalm in the morning. it smells like victory.
V572625694: Seriously. Life is hard! Boo effing hoo. I would freakin’ love to be paid to follow Hopey across America.
MathewBrooks:
With all due respect to the Wonkette team and the others covering the campaign, for my money “Fear & Loathing on the Campaign Trail ‘72″ is the single greatest work of journalism in the history of mankind. Thompson’s drunken, and drug fueled writing seemed to capture the core of R. M. Nixon’s vile character. I just wish I could read his take on McCain.
My guess would be that he who smelt it dealt it.
“The candy dishes on the McCain plane are always filled with Werther’s Originals. The couches in the lounge still have the plastic on them… the mini-fridge is always stocked with cans of Fresca… “
…whoever smelt it, dealt it!!!
Whoever smelt it dealt it!
The problem on McCorpse’s aircraft is keeping him from playing with the blue water in the head ( lavatory ).
dano: And Werther’s Original.
InKnockYouUs: Damn, who knew isms smelled so bad. I bet that guy’s house smells like douchism. or maybe just jizm.
AngryBlakGuy: jinx
Shirley you can’t be serious about the smell!
Smells like Nirvana.
Reynolds neglects to mention the free hand jobs given on each McCain flight. Cindy is kept so busy that occasionally Bristol has to spell her.
On the Obama flight all you get are boring position papers.
WadISay: mr.november: …talk about a jinx!
But here’s this comment-er:
Obama is a disgrace he is unqualified to be president, he treats ever one poorly1 His plane is dirty, because he has an upside down flag as his logo on the plane rather than American Flag! BLUE WHITE RED and there is the logo a Top of a Mosque, and to sword blades scode of arms for islam! Oringa Kenya Obama and Treason it’’s coming soon! Obamas EGO is ten times his capability, he is nothing but a Muslim Manchurian Candidate. OBAMA is not organized, he is pure nut bag that has handlers! To all in the Media what does Obama say? Nothing, he talks like he in a circle jerk or never answers a question!
SelfDeprecatingFed: The politics of rasc?
He was graciously smuggling in Kenyans seven months ago, but understandably he forgot about them. He’s a very busy man.
Apropos nothing, this will always be my favorite pic of Barry from this campaign:
Barry waving in the rain
So evocative of boding or whatever.
the dude just needs to trim his nose hairs - that should take care of the smelly problem
Barry is Roger Murdock and McSame is Captain Oveur……Joey, you ever seen a grown man naked? HEGHH….Ever hang around a gymnasium HEGHH…..The hackey maam must be the empty headed flight attended who gave Otto oral sex…..ughhhhh
Awww…that movie…
Remember when Zucker wasn’t a colossal douchebag?
AngryBlakGuy: That’s sort of wierd. Was your mother’s name Helen? Did you have a dog named Lady?
Oh my God. They’re doing the “negroes stink” thing. Unbelievable.
pickled pigs feet and waffles.
Dear Mr. Reynolds: On behalf of the Obama campaign, I have traced the scent you are speaking of. It is Early American Douchbag and it eminates from you.
Apparently no matter how childish your opinion of the political press is, they go and open their mouths and prove that you didn’t lower the bar enough. I bet Obama doesn’t even mesquite smoke his BBQ.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
magic titty: Gotta love someone that calls herself Kitty! How many letters in weed? Is she suggesting that Obama was so jealous he A: Shit himself or B: Farted?
I wonder why my blog was taken down, because I said that OBAMA hangs with criminals. And what ever they smelled on that plane was not plain cig. probably more like w…..d. or what ever they smoke, that is an ugly smell and is not easy to get rid of. Obama has looked a little irratic and loose lately….Hello little naive persons. MCCain’’s mortgage plan is BRILlANT, good for him. Obama is jealous it wasn”t him to suggest it.
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Posted by miukitty at 03:25 PM : Oct 09, 2008
ManchuCandidate: Yes, I am, and stop calling me Shirley.
dano: I wonder if the Obama plane smells bad because it’s a horrible den of drugs and alcohol, like HST wrote of the McGovern plane in ‘72.
Texan Bulldoggette: I just knew someone would beat me to the ironic faux-racist take.
Itsjustme: ha. whatever “they” smoke. “irratic”.
sadly, she’s probably already taken.
That’s what happens when you get a plane full of mostly vegetarians.
S.Luggo: A much more plausible explanation for her cast than a handshake.
Keram2: I don’t think our hero HST would have been able to make it through this campaign. Well, at his advanced age, he would have just shot people while nursing a Jameson’s.
worst of all, obama never hands out any werther’s original.
What a-i’ll say it-douchnozzle. This rabid parasite is lucky he’s employed, and he’s bitching. Kind of like a mini-version of America, nést-ce pas?
I begged Hillary not to put that carp in the cooling system.
McCain leaves events early instead of hanging around to meet real Americans just so he can get back to the plane and tidy up with a little Febreze abd potpourri…
I bet Cindy is actually sporting “LÁir du Cunt”…by an elitist french perfumer, La Cunt.
It’s Obama’s cologne: “Eau Sama”. By Mennen.
Ah, Dean? Sweetie? The freakin’ plane is dirtier because they are USING it more. If Barry is doing three shows a day, and Walnuts is doing ONE that means WALNUT’S plane is parked longer. Ergo, it gets CLEANED because there is more ground time. Also, some of the more “out of the way” airports do not have much in the way of “services” for anything bigger than a Cessna. What a serious douche. And he doesn’t even work for FixedNoise.
lazyb: [i]Gee, are all reporters such whiny little bitches?[/i]
Um, yes. Well except for the war correspondent types, but most of them don’t bother with (domestic) politics.
I too, prefer nearly-empty airplanes where nobody bothers me and there’s only the soft-spoken and snoozing elderly around.
Read the original article.
1. I think this guy is confused because he thinks that Obama should actually be serving him on the plane, and is confused that the black guy is running for president instead of cleaning the plane.
2. Obama doesn’t release his schedule so that the people that Palin riled up at her rallies don’t try to assassinate him.
3. McSleepy’s schedule is always on time because he only does one event a day so there is time for him to take a nice long nap.
4. This is deliberately invoking racist stereotypes that black people smell and are dirty.
5. Do you remember when reporters used to actually like go out and report stories instead of waiting for Obama to bring them the news with their sherry?
MAYBE OBAMA HATED HIS REPUBLICAN ASS AND FARTED TO GET RID OF HIM!
Stinks like sex in here. Meow.
It’s 6 a.m. Insomnia. Got up to pee and snark. Cannot stop laughing. All of the above was some funny shit. Really funny shit. All is right with the world. Let the day begin!
You should smell his house!
Dont vote for B.O.
You should smell his “feet”!He sleeps with his shoes on because he doesnt want to smell “defeat”!
Dont vote for B.O.
Why do you think they call him B.O.?
Dont vote for B.O.