Wonkette
David Brooks is an actual MAD MAN! This is what he wrote last Friday in his farty little column: “Palin held up her end of an energetic debate that gave voters a direct look at two competing philosophies. She established debating parity with Joe Biden. And in a country that is furious with Washington, she presented herself as a radical alternative.” So in love! But now he’s 180ed again after realizing that the “radical alternative” she presented herself as was just a filthy malignant tumor — he called her “cancer,” ha ha ha, WHAT?
Not just your grandpa’s boring, garden-variety prostate cancer, either — Brooks means the REAL shit, the death cancer:
[Sarah Palin] represents a fatal cancer to the Republican party. When I first started in journalism, I worked at the National Review for Bill Buckley. And Buckley famously said he’d rather be ruled by the first 2,000 names in the Boston phone book than by the Harvard faculty. But he didn’t think those were the only two options. He thought it was important to have people on the conservative side who celebrated ideas, who celebrated learning. And his whole life was based on that, and that was also true for a lot of the other conservatives in the Reagan era. Reagan had an immense faith in the power of ideas. But there has been a counter, more populist tradition, which is not only to scorn liberal ideas but to scorn ideas entirely. And I’m afraid that Sarah Palin has those prejudices. I think President Bush has those prejudices.
You know what else has been a “cancer”? Various chunks of John McCain’s face! And so what’s the problem? It’s that elitist coasties like David Brooks, who probably has like seven iPods and all sorts of homosexual art hanging in his rich person’s New York penthouse on Fancypants Avenue, doesn’t understand Main Street Small Town values. Main Street loves votin’ for a hometown tumor, especially a “hockey mom tumor.” And when that death tumor winked on the teevee, ol’ Mom & Pop who live on Main Street said to themselves, “Well golly, that soggy tumor was a-winkin’ at me!”
David Brooks: Sarah Palin “Represents A Fatal Cancer To The Republican Party” [HuffPo]
ass cancer is a bitch
Well “Syphilis” and “Sarah Palin” share a lot of the same letters.
So Brooks finally noticed that w and Caribou Barbie are stupid. Wow, that guy sure is quick on the draw.
Must be communicable form of brain cancer.
Face Cancer? Ass Cancer? Syphilis Palin?
Obama is the Cipro we need.
Well you KNOW the Obama victory bus is about to start rolling out when even David Brooks wants to get on. I don’t know, should we let him on? It might be cute if we could get him to blush a lot.
Brooks lunched at Le Cirque? Gay. Also, this:
“And I was dazzled, I felt the tingle up my knee as Chris Matthews would say.”
Total bottom.
Brooks then put on a Che Guevara beret and stoked up a big ol’ doobie, and then bumped chests with Pinch.
I heart the ire spewed by newell. spread that shite like terminal cancer. these overpaid goons should all be sacked or have the salary slashed in half.
The Chris Matthews leg tingle is, evidently, contagious. “And I was dazzled, I felt the tingle up my knee as Chris Matthews would say.” It’s almost like voodoo.
Bullshit. It’s not a fatal cancer. The Republicans may get dumber and dumber, but they’ll keep stumbling along like a herd of downer cattle.
I don’t know dead Buckley personally, but you, David Brooks, are no Buckley. What would Old Buckley have actually said?
Reagan celebrated ideas and learning?
queeraselvis v 2.0: toilet bottom even
Palin looks pretty darn good for someone so full of cancer.
Jesus, was that pic of David Brooks taken at his bar-mitzvah?
Speaking of Jewish events, Happy Atonement, David.
Brooks didn’t take his medication or what?
David Brooks? Is he still here? fine.
Anyway, she seems more farts and lupus to me. But I’m an optimist.
I worry this is agent provocateur. They’re all hoping libs get to cocky. America hates cocky libs. Likes chastened libs.
queeraselvis v 2.0: Dammit! I didn’t see your post. Must hit refresh…
if you happen to see Walnuts at the local Quik Stop, chuck cigarettes at him, scream ‘cancer merchant’ and then buy some chewlie’s gum.
So WALNUTS has had Palin several times?
So David… let me make sure I’m understanding this… you’re saying that willfully ignorant shitheads driven by divisive ideology make for poor governing? Whaaaaaa… ??!?!?
Someone tell Drudge to break out the biggest siren he’s got.
Oh sure, it was fine to burn the innards of disemboweled intellectuals while Bush was riding high, but now that you’ve shat on the economy and the polls is unfriendly the brain thinks are suddenly important again?
In WoW we would say: HIPPO CRITS you for 24,286 damage. You die.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: No doubt. She might have some way of giving everyone that listens to her mad cow disease. In her case mad moose disease
Damn, he’s talking liking like she laughed at his penis or something.
queeraselvis v 2.0: Seriously! That’s the headline from this thing. Not that Palin is a fatal cancer, but that Brooks literally gets hard talking political philosophy with Hopey!
Serolf Divad: Sarah Palin = a sprain, Hal = rasp inhala
SayItWithWookies: Says the vegetarian elitist.
nietzscheprojectile: Not a problem. Usually the words “Chris Matthews” cause me temporary blindness, and I think seriously about chopping off my ears.
awe geez, is even Bobo giving up now?
the whole infa-structure of the base is disintegrating before our very eyes!!
what fun will that become??
This is how republicans react to one of their own whom they suspect will not allow the rich to keep looting the American Treasury.
Damn. The market is down ANOTHER 200 points today? Isn’t that the wrong direction, now that we have international hope and love and bailouts for Eurobanks?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: One suspects that Brooks has wanked off into his copy of Moral Man and Immoral Society more than once. And, well, ew.
Cogito Ergo Bibo:Getting Hard for Hopey is not a unique phenomenon, especially at the Weekly Standard, no matter what they might say.
AnnieGetYourFun: Oh — busted! I almost said bovine spongiform encephalopathy too.
“….he’d rather be ruled by the first 2,000 names in the Boston phone book than by the Harvard faculty.” They weren’t on the sample ballot What about Hopey and WALNUTS!
Love the new NYT building, BTW. Oddly, it looks, from a distance, like a gothic cathedral tower.
Palin probably reminds Brooks of the populist mouthbreathers he encounters at the TGI Friday’s salad bar.
You know what else has been a “cancer”? Various chunks of John McCain’s face!
You made me spit food at the computer, Jim! Hehehahahaha!
Hhmph! I bet this triumvirate of terrorism (Brooks, Ayers, and Obama) all pal-around together having gay sex at Le Cirque while they secretly plot to suicide bomb an Olive Garden.
Any one check 538 today? Walnuts now only has a 9.5% chance to win.
And when that death tumor winked on the teevee, ol’ Mom & Pop who live on Main Street said to themselves, “Well golly, that soggy tumor was a-winkin’ at me!”
No, no, no. Only the freaking editor of the freaking National Review, who lives, by the way, in that den of iniquity known as New York City on a wingnut welfare salary where he doubtless spends lots of time at elitist cocktail parties where they serve argula, was stupid enough to think that.
Let’s please give mom and pop a little credit for not being as blindingly, headsmackingly stupid as Rich Lowry. Remember that very few creatures who have achieved multi-cell status are, in fact, as stupid as Rich Lowry. This includes mythical constructs who live on nonexistent main streets. Thank you.
Rats, this is your call to abandon ship.
V572625694: I call bullshit on this quote. As an Anglophile, Buckley would rather have been told what to do by a liberal than a Mick from Boston.
This is too easy, people…three weeks left…plenty of time to dance in the end zone after your candidate has actually won.
Of course, the only thing that could cause an Obama defeat now would be unsavoury pictures, unless they were with Britney.
obfuscator: “So David… let me make sure I’m understanding this… you’re saying that willfully ignorant shitheads driven by divisive ideology make for poor governing? Whaaaaaa… ??!?!?”
I don’t think that’s what he’s saying. I think he’s just worried that there’s no place for the likes of a David Poindexter Brooks in a the new knuckle-dragging Palin ‘Publican Party.
I want to know what made Brooks change his mind so quickly from she’s a “radical alternative” to she’s a “fatal cancer to the Republican party”. What could have caused that?
a) Mad at Palin for laughing at his penis (thank you Gopherit 2.0)
b) Unhappy with crappy glory hole blowjob from McOnion
c) Mentally unstable due to own brain tumor
d) Utterly full of shit most of time
obfuscator: Elitist! Ruby Tuesday has the salad bar(and the most obese patrons). Get your chain/day of the week restaurant right.
Gopherit v2.0: Well, who among us hasn’t laughed at his penis?
No wonder he’s a bit sensitive…
The sad thing is Republican intellectuals are, for the most part, poliitically impotent. Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Bill O’Reilly, and Sean Hannity are about as elite as it gets when it comes to Republican intellectuals who actually have influence on the Republican party, all the others (huddling in the corner on NRO) only influence other Republican intellectuals (read: conservative circle jerk). THE REPUBLICAN BASE (Mr. Joeseph Sixpack) does not give a FLYING CRAPCAKE what David Brooks thinks, nor do they even know who he is.
Me haz a sad for him.
William Buckley was a fraud, not just intellectually but as a human being, and anyone who admired him is a sucker — so let’s join hands and sing, “David Brooks, my friend, is blowin’ with the wind, David Brooks is blowin’ with the wind.”
Great photo of David — we loved him as McLovin’ in “Superbad.”
OH MY GOD. I understand it now. Robert Novak’s brain expelled the tumor, and sent it back in time, where it gave birth to five children and ran for Mayor of Wasilla and is now running for VP. If she wins, it will be the end of times, as she merges with her true father and together, like that creepy guy in Total Recall, they shall rule the world and usher in an age of darkness!!!
You should animate that tumor and get it up on the youtubes. It sounds cute! America would love it. It would sell lots of Happy Meals.
An angel’s wink is what you sell
You promise me drilling, then put me through hell
Brains of duh got a hold on me
When flirting’s a prison, you can’t break free
You’re a loaded gun
There’s nowhere to run
No one can save Cons
The damage is done
[Chorus:]
Shot like a wolf
And you’re to blame
You give Cons a bad name
You play your part and I say your name
You give Cons a bad name
You give Cons a bad name
Tattooed lipstick on your lips
Blood red suits over your nice tits
A Joe six pack’s dream, you act so sly
Your very first wink was your first wink goodbye
You’re a loaded gun
There’s nowhere to run
No one can save Cons
The damage is done
Shot like a wolf
And you’re to blame
You give Cons a bad name
You play your part and I say your name
You give Cons a bad name
You give Cons a bad name
better late than never, i guess. i’ll still cringe whenever it’s his editorial day in the NYT though. Flip-flopper!!!
“Ronald Reagan had an immense faith in the power of ideas.”
wtf? Where do these douchebags get this shit?
Bill Buckley? Eeew gross. Who fucking cares David fucking Brooks. These douchebags will do and say ANYTHING to hold onto their (families’) money.
“….he’d rather be ruled by the first 2,000 names in the Boston phone book than by the Harvard faculty.”
Is he saying something about people whose name starts with A?
Good morning, Mr. Brooks! This is your wake-up call. That pole dancer you just couldn’t get enough of last night as you poked dollars in her cooch? Yep, that’s her next to you in bed this morning and that’s your ring on her finger. And that is indeed a map of Alaska tattooed on her ass. Don’t look so horror stricken. What do you mean you can’t take her home to mother? And those rubbers on the nightstand? Yep, still in the wrapper. Happy bloodtest!
Poor Sister Sarah. Republicans fuck things up for eight years, then pull her out of the freezer and get to blame their coming looming losses on that dopey girl from Alaska. Not that I mind them doing that, because they will continue fucking things up and she goes on the mooseburger lecture circuit, if she’s not in jail by then.
Oh my God, David Brooks has a major crush on Hopey. I knew all those endless columns of his were about his conflicted emotions. Remember his fast Eddy and Dr. Barack column - that was him rationalizing why he loves Hopey. It’s so cute!
SlouchingTowardsWasilla: Not only did Ronald Reagan have an immense faith in the power of ideas, but he had a bag full of Magic Fairy Dust that he sprinkled all over everything and everyone, to make America strong and proud and rich and free and *happy*, and one day he will return again in glory, riding on Pegasus’ back through the clouds!
Don’t you know *anything*? You need to talk to more half-educated neoconservatives, clearly.
facehead: Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Bill O’Reilly, and Sean Hannity as intellectuals? What you been smokin? The true conservative intellectuals (Andrew Sullivan comes to mind) (ok no pun intended) have left the Repugs…
Man, I hope Brooks has an unlisted address, ’cause they’re gonna eviscerate him.
But which of Srah’s faithful followers will shout “Kill him!” When Sarah denounces Brooks as another MSM terrorist apologist at her next KKK rally.
Hopebong: Aldrich, Alden, Bartlett, Bradford, Cabot - ’nuff said!
I preferred it back when Brooks was on the other side of a Times paywall and I didn’t have to sully my pretty little mind with his ditherings
Every time the Ice Princess of Mooseburg opens that yammerin’ trap of hers, I begin to consider that death may be bliss.
@Gopherit v. 2.0: I’m afraid I know that WFB quote is authentic, but I’m too ashamed to say why I know. Not that he meant it, of course.
Don’t ask how I found this… but apparently, Palindromes (i.e. Palindromic sequences of DNA) are actually associated with some diseases, in particular some cancers.
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/07/080714171157.htm
Of course, this means David Brooks is a genius.
About time someone went on the record with this: http://tinyurl.com/3hru7h