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THAT ONE

You Know What McCain Calls Obama? ‘That One’


Here it is again, my friends. It is also here. And here’s the fun entire debate, via C-SPAN, after the jump.


12:02 AM on Wed October 8 2008
By Ken Layne
8100 Views

  1. McCainsThirdNipple says at 12:06 am, October 8th, 2008

    Huh.. when McCain said “that one” I assumed he was referring to his third nipple.

  2. facehead says at 12:06 am, October 8th, 2008

    This isn’t exactly a “macaca” moment, maybe a little closer to when Ross Perot was talking to a crowd of black people and referred to them with “you people.”

  3. AngryBlakGuy says at 12:07 am, October 8th, 2008

    …WALNUTS! had a flash back to the day he bought his first slave.

    Daddy McCain: “Johnny, which negroid do you think we should buy?”

    John McCain: “That one!”

  4. I’m beginning to like Tweety. (This is a cry for help.)

  5. It wasn’t done to be mean. He just forgets peoples’ names.

  6. Harold_Ignoramis says at 12:11 am, October 8th, 2008

    Yes, he was actually refering to Neo and not Morpheus.

  7. OhYeahAlright says at 12:11 am, October 8th, 2008

    That asshole has no respect for hopey, Obama should just straight up kick his ass. Johnny and Barry at the flagpole after recess! They need to settle this now! McCain gets first punch because he’s physically retarded.

    Honestly though, I don’t see how McCain can claim to “reach across the aisle” so frequently. He clearly holds immense distaste for everyone who disagrees with him. No wonder he refuses to negotiate or even sit down with other leaders, he can’t stand the sight of them.

  8. mookworthjwilson says at 12:11 am, October 8th, 2008

    It’s better than “The colored fella over there”

  9. springfield_meltdown says at 12:12 am, October 8th, 2008

    I just hope “that one” isn’t also his nickname for his youngest (and adopted) daughter.

  10. Whitey Did Katrina says at 12:13 am, October 8th, 2008

    WadISay: It’s not your fault. Matthews is the only person in America enjoying himself tonight. Except maybe Levi and Bristol also–but they have likely hopped the retaining wall into Russia and thus don’t count as “in America.”

  11. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 12:13 am, October 8th, 2008

    I laughed when I heard him say that…
    That one– that *gasp* negro! That black man right there!
    Who is Obama, fucking Emmett Till?

  12. I hope for the last debate, on the opening handshake, Hopey prolongs it, keeps holding his hand and chats a little, and the country gets to see McCain throw a hissy.

  13. Whitey Did Katrina says at 12:14 am, October 8th, 2008

    OhYeahAlright: “Maverick” is political speak for “all colleagues regardless of party think you’re a petulant dickface.”

  14. facehead says at 12:14 am, October 8th, 2008

    facehead: Being super fair and sober, I’m confident that he meant “that senator” as opposed to himself, not “that chicken-stealin negro!” or something.

  15. evolutionista says at 12:15 am, October 8th, 2008

    walnuts is lucky that barry is a total (and spectacular) nerd. personally, i would have choked the old man.

  16. DogSniff says at 12:16 am, October 8th, 2008

    Say it ain’t so! Well dog-gone-it, John, we’re only suppose to say that about our dark-skinned “friend” Obama when we’re in one of our campaign powwows. Ya know - on the QT?

    Yeah - I think it’s more a Perot “you people” moment. Only worse since he was saying it derisively and pointedly. If anyone was watching C-SPAN after they would have seen McCain run off stage rather than stay and shake hands. I think he’d been through enough with “that one” and had to get the dark germs off after the hand-shakes.

  17. schvitzatura says at 12:16 am, October 8th, 2008

    Harold_Ignoramis: Actually, actually he was referring to Ted Logan and not Cowboy Curtis…

  18. wonkthis says at 12:19 am, October 8th, 2008

    I was surprised McCain just didn’t tackle Barry from behind after the bomb bomb bomb Iran slamfest.

  19. sati demise says at 12:20 am, October 8th, 2008

    Whitey Did Katrina: yup yup! Fits that TEAM of Mavericks, haha.

    Unfortunately, the Maverick family of Texas resent WALNUTS!/Bible Spice using their name sake in this campaign…
    They are voting for Obama.

  20. This whole not looking at Obama, not shaking his hand, referring to him as that one is so much more than I thought it was originally. I thought McCain was pulling these crap under the fear that showing respect or acknowledge Obama in any way would legitimize him.

    it is clear now that McCain hates Obama. This is more than just policy differences. Is it racism or just the fact that Obama stands in the way of McCain’s ultimate goal? Not sure, but it clearly shows that McCain should not be allowed to lead a girl scout troop, let alone the country.

  21. Would you be more or less likely to vote for McCain if he called his illegitimate black child “that one”?

  22. Seriously though what a giant puss McCain has turned out to be. He should quit this nonsense and go back to arguing with guys at the gas station over who’s turn it was at the pump.

  23. mr.november says at 12:23 am, October 8th, 2008

    Don Rickles he is not.

  24. skyinator says at 12:25 am, October 8th, 2008

    Maybe he thought Cindy Lou was standing over there; you know, “that one” the “c**t.

  25. OhYeahAlright: You notice WALNUTS! reaching-across-the-aisle-talky is always followed closely by vinegar Joe Lieberman’s name. Which is not actually reaching across, more like reaching down and patting him on the head, since he’s blowing the GOP leadership anyway.

    Also, could WALNUTS! mention Petraeus some more, crush much? I see little hearts swirling around like so many liver spots every time he says his name. General Petraeus says thus and so, and he’s soooo dreeeeeamy.

  26. Whitey Did Katrina says at 12:27 am, October 8th, 2008

    Ha! Mike DuHaime in trying to paint Obama as only voting in politically expedient ways started to say “John McCain has always gone against public opinion” but then realized this played into the “angry crotchety dickface” narrative and stopped himself.

  27. Captain Crook says at 12:27 am, October 8th, 2008

    Here’s a slightly longer clip. Watch the reaction of the “that one” in the light colored jacket, behind Senator Obama.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNzA9LfMlmU

  28. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 12:27 am, October 8th, 2008

    Taxes, Bombs, Quotas,
    That One
    Defeat, Commie, Druggie …
    Is That One
    He’s tinsel on a tree …
    He’s everything that every one should be!

  29. Paulitik says at 12:27 am, October 8th, 2008

    Finally a candidate who speaks to black people like my racist Middle Georgian Relatives do. Sarah Palin was dousing a cross with lighter fluid that whole segment. Aren’t you proud America? McCain refers to the MLK Holiday as “That day”

  30. Mr Blifil says at 12:28 am, October 8th, 2008

    “That one. The big strapping buck with the fine teeth and the powerful hams.”

  31. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 12:28 am, October 8th, 2008

    Let me be clear: The most defining moment was at the very end when the ‘Bamas were endlessly shaking hands and taking pictures and having fun with actual people!.. Johnny Mac and Cruella DePill were nowhere to be found.

  32. ghardcastle says at 12:28 am, October 8th, 2008

    What do you expect?? All those uppity colored folks look alike to McCain.

  33. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 12:31 am, October 8th, 2008

    So, by the next debate, will McCain refuse to be in the same room as Obama?

    I’m sort of picturing McCain looking like Mr. Burns in his full Howard Hughes phase in a year or two with tissue boxes on his feet.

  34. liberaljewmedia says at 12:32 am, October 8th, 2008

    Huh, they seem to be chatting with the cast of Little Britain on MSNBC right now. Interesting choice.

  35. DogSniff says at 12:32 am, October 8th, 2008

    Even the talking heads noticed McCain’s hatred for Obama. “The Handshake” snub tonight is making the rounds - and it’s ugly.

    Add it up - and don’t it smell like a whole lotta bigot?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WI0iIOqPGak&feature=user

  36. Whitey Did Katrina says at 12:36 am, October 8th, 2008

    liberaljewmedia: How are ALL of these people the King of Prussia of Pennsylvania??? Even the sweet broads???

  37. ReverendGreen says at 12:37 am, October 8th, 2008

    how’d the cnn monkey-meters react to “that one?”

  38. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 12:38 am, October 8th, 2008

    Someone get Bob Schaeffer to ask McCain next week: “Senator McCain, can you turn and look at Senator Obama for a minute, and then say ‘President Obama.’”

  39. schvitzatura says at 12:38 am, October 8th, 2008

    The ghost of William Alexander McCain invaded WcSame’s withered carcass from the beyond…”that one, will do fine, planting indigo next season, mother”

  40. Prediction: McCain is not going to survive Obama’s election to Presidency by more than a few months. He is developing such a visible hatred of him that it’s becoming clear he’s invested the entire leftovers of his spirit and vitality into defeating him.

    Naturally, before he loses and kicks the bucket a broken man, McCain is going to gift us with a third debate, where he will presumably do nothing but chant “NIGGER, NIGGER, AYERS, WRIGHT, AYERS WRIGHT! NIGGER, NIGGER, AYERS, WRIGHT, AYERS WRIGHT!!”

  41. El Bombastico says at 12:46 am, October 8th, 2008

    Can somebody do a YouTube compilation of the slack-jawed troglogdytes in these “uncommitted voter” focus groups spouting their retarded platitudes?

  42. ReverendGreen: They reacted by drooping. Familiar territory for McCain.

  43. DoctorCulturae says at 12:47 am, October 8th, 2008

    Let’s see now, who do I want to vote for… the guy who is calm and collected or Sen. Waddling McGrumpy.

  44. pipesfeeny says at 12:48 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: cruella dePill. LOL!

  45. obfuscator says at 12:48 am, October 8th, 2008

    Just got finished checking out the first reaction polls. A majority of Americans polled seem to have enjoyed seeing a young(ish) black guy kick an old rich white man’s ass.

    Truly this is shaping up to be a historic election.

  46. ms_mcgee says at 12:49 am, October 8th, 2008

    ironic that obama’s cnn grades spell ABBA, WALNUTS favorite band? http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/10/07/debate.reportcard/index.html

  47. jimh: And when McCarpetbagger mntions Tailginner Joe, CNN real-time EEG dropped like a rock….

  48. SayItWithWookies says at 12:52 am, October 8th, 2008

    Michael Gerson: By the standards I set out beforehand — that mysteriously don’t involve whether McCain actually did better than That One — McCain won. Right across from this on WaPo’s front page is an article titled “Retirement Savings Wiped Out.” As Gerson says at the end of his pathetic apologia, “life isn’t fair.”

  49. magic titty says at 12:53 am, October 8th, 2008

    Don’t we all realize McDickbag is finally thisclose to his ultimate life goal, and a fucking BLACK AFRICAN NEGRO is going to deny him of it.
    Would you shake the hand of the guy currently ruining the rest of your life?

    And Cindy thought she got called a cunt a lot *before* he lost a Presidential election? Ha. Just wait until he’s sitting around one of the houses next year barking at you for being a twat who always missplaces the remote. Be very afraid, chicky.

  50. ms_mcgee:

    Sorry, not sure I heard that correctly: McCain knows who ABBA is? Or does he think that’s a terrorist unit operating in Afghan/Iran/-anything-else-istan??

  51. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 12:54 am, October 8th, 2008

    ms_mcgee: ..and that’s a Palindrome
    (I gotta million of ‘em but I’ll stop now).

  52. Worlds End says at 12:55 am, October 8th, 2008
  53. Fact_Chucker says at 12:56 am, October 8th, 2008

    jimh: Everyone knows that “reach across the aisle” is Hanoi Hilton slang for a reach-around. So, what he’s really saying is, “Despite my greater rank and seniority, I was considerate enough to give Joe Lieberman a reach-around while sodomizing him. Isn’t that bipartisan of me?”.

  54. Nathalie08 says at 12:57 am, October 8th, 2008

    Lionel Hutz Esq.: hahahhaha

  55. WhatTheHeck says at 12:58 am, October 8th, 2008

    And that is that. Sista Sarah now running McCain’s campaign?
    Walnutz, you old fool. Get on your Palin donkey and ride her into the sunset.
    But, you know, that sun done set on that foolish ass of yours.

  56. Okay–conspiracy!!!! just as I typed “… terrorist unit…etc”.. Earthlink shut me down—- dammit! Was that masked man a….a…GOP sympathizer???!!?? or, OH NO!! not…not… but NO ONE suspects the Spanish Inquisition!!!!!!

    I rest my case!!

  57. StrangelyBrown says at 1:01 am, October 8th, 2008

    Hey, John: they call him SENATOR OBAMA.

  58. Destonio says at 1:04 am, October 8th, 2008
  59. obfuscator: Why did it take so long for this phenomenon reach the political arena? We’ve been doing this while watching NFL games for years. Michael Strahan and Reggie White made millions doing it.

    Obama is doing to McCain in the political arena what LT did to Joe Theisman that Monday Night all those years ago: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1i_bJv_0z-k

    Warning: not for the sqeamish

  60. magic titty says at 1:11 am, October 8th, 2008

    Destonio: Yes please.

  61. FidelCatro says at 1:12 am, October 8th, 2008

    No one seems to be noticing that Grumpy Gramps basically told us that everyone expecting “entitlement” to all that dough we’ve been pouring into social security can just get off his lawn!

  62. SayItWithWookies says at 1:13 am, October 8th, 2008

    Andy McCarthy at The Corner: We have a disaster here.
    Yippeeeeee!

  63. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:15 am, October 8th, 2008

    I did not know about “That One.” I have learned from Walnuts. TEACH ME MORE ABOUT THAT ONE WALNUTS!

  64. SayItWithWookies says at 1:18 am, October 8th, 2008

    And Rich Lowry has no starbursts. In fact, it’s rather sorry and flaccid.

  65. Remember how the Foxes tried to call out Obama as rude for calling WALNUTS! “John”? So where does “That one” fall on the rudeness scale, compared to “John”? (Hint: it all becomes clear when you remember that negroes are not supposed to get uppity, and white folks can do what they wants.)

  66. magic titty says at 1:20 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: So why would McCarthy vote for McCain again?

  67. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 1:23 am, October 8th, 2008

    azw88: Ah, the Minister of Defense (probably should have kept his mouth shut).. Fuck Strahan and LT and any Giants D. I’m an Eagles fan.

    Anyway, I’m straying way off-topic– I’m pleased to announce after long consideration (the day I saw his keynote speech) and soul-searching, that I am voting for That One and The Amtrak Guy.

  68. Nick vdK says at 1:26 am, October 8th, 2008

    In McCain’s defense, he’s probably got Alzheimer’s.

  69. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:26 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: Wow! That article was awful! Do you want to make it gone?

  70. SayItWithWookies says at 1:26 am, October 8th, 2008

    magic titty: Because (holds up list) there are 346 registered Communists in the Federal Government!

  71. SayItWithWookies says at 1:29 am, October 8th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: Can that happen? Really?!

  72. Simple Disaster says at 1:30 am, October 8th, 2008

    McCain and Palin remind me of Squizzy & Lenny from Laverne and Shirley.

    In fact, people should start watching re-runs to get an idea of what to expect if the gods frown upon us.

  73. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:31 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: Do they have followers? Do they have monkeys who dance? Are they descending on us right now?

  74. obfuscator says at 1:32 am, October 8th, 2008

    I’ll reserve final judgment for a day or so, but are we at that point where Barry can basically ignore WALNUTS! and Mooselini and make the campaign all about his “vision for America”? Axelrod, Gibbs and the rest of the campaign faces can take every opportunity to talk about how an Obama administration would deal with the economy, health care and foreign policy while deftly brushing off/ignoring any shit that McCain throws his way.

    Let Palin race bait in a desperate attempt to energize the psychotic backward-assed racist base that is all the GOP has left. Let Grampa flounder and flail as he tries to find his bearings. Change the narrative of the campaign and transcend the back and forth battle of press releases. It might take one more decisive debate win, but I hope that Barry’s at the point where he can truly be a ‘game changer’ and take the high road while simultaneously destroying any chance for Grampa get back into the race.

  75. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:33 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: In a better world, yes. It would be gone.

  76. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 1:34 am, October 8th, 2008

    Perhaps at that moment McCant was remembering the wartime days of yesteryear in ‘The Big Red One’ and knew he’d be scolded if he referred to Obama as ‘The Big Black One’, so he just called him “That One”.

  77. SayItWithWookies says at 1:35 am, October 8th, 2008
  78. schvitzatura says at 1:37 am, October 8th, 2008

    azw88: No, it was more like what happened to Tim Krumrie when trying to tackle Roger Craig in Super Bowl XXIII. Fucking brutal…I’ll always remember that one, the impact and the rubbery flopping as the shattered appendage kept striking the turf.

    One for teh ages…

  79. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:39 am, October 8th, 2008

    Markets »
    Updated: 5:16 pm ET, October 07
    -508.39
    (-5.11%)
    Dow 9,447.11
    -108.08
    (-5.80%)
    Nasdaq 1,754.88
    -60.66
    (-5.74%)
    S&P 996.23

    And then right after that they say (http://www.cnn.com/) “Get Quotes.” This is so great. I love Walnuts, I love “that one.”

  80. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 1:42 am, October 8th, 2008

    Simple Disaster: Squiggy..
    Here’s one for you! Unrelated, but funny.

  81. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:42 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Remember when Walnuts states that “General George Washington led the American revolutionary troops across the Delaware River in order to surprise the English and Hessian troops in the Battle of Trenton the day after Christmas in 1776,” because he was there.

  82. claytor says at 1:43 am, October 8th, 2008

    Why do they even bother to have questions?

    They should have a chili cook off instead.

  83. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:47 am, October 8th, 2008

    claytor: Oh sweet god I didn’t know you folks were still around.

  84. demian:

    Does anyone remember Shrub (Bush the First) referring to one of his grandchildren as “that’s him— the little brown one!” ??

    Gotta love them GOP persons!! (um, WASP, anyone?)

  85. schvitzatura says at 1:49 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Yeah, I guess poor old Donovan McNabb is always “that one” to the guys down at Geno’s, huh.

    Especially this year. Along with Westbrook.

    Should they just plain fucking choke on their provo wit, dose guys?

    N.B. Dan Snyder is a douchetard, FWIW…

  86. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:50 am, October 8th, 2008

    My apologies for the drunken bullshit.

  87. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 1:50 am, October 8th, 2008

    Simple Disaster: I’ve been fucking awful at linking lately so here:
    http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/E/M/2/candidates-star-wars.jpg

    shortsshortsshorts: Yes, he referred to it as “Washington’s Crossing”, no shit– before it happened.

  88. PentagonBookkeeper says at 1:53 am, October 8th, 2008

    DogSniff: Smoke Filled Roommate:
    Yeah, that withdrawn “handshake” tells us all we already knew. The blowback for McCain’t was that his dissing Obama’s handshake, set Cindy up for it. She got a whole lotta Barack germs (or pheromones!) during her handshake with Barry. She withdrew her hand and tucked her entire arm behind her back and held her two hands together tightly, so as not to spread the blackness to her old man. Next thing, Cindy and Johnny rushed out of there so that she could be decontaminated, and her husband needed a good sandblasting after his proximity to Obama’s dangerous cooties. The old man reminded me of patients I used to work with who were being acclimated to various doses of antipsychotic meds: there was the classic “Haldol shuffle” that McCain nailed.

  89. Abe: That one is EVIL, I tells ya. Evil! Eeeeeeviillll!!!
    Marge: Grandpa, you said that about all the candidates.
    Abe: I just want attention…

    ——-

    Grampa: “I got separated from my platoon after we parachuted into Duseldorf so I rode out the rest of the war posing as a German cabaret singer.[singing] Won’t you come home Frantbrelda, won’t you come home.”

    Bart: “Is that story true Grampa?”

    Grampa: “Most of it. I did wear a dress for a period in the 40s. Oh, they had designers then.”

    ——-

    “Now! Hey, listen! Now, my story begins in 19 dickety two. We had to say dickety ’cause that Kaiser had stolen our word twenty. I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety six miles.”

    ——-

    “You, President? This is the greatest country in the world. We’ve got a whole system set up to prevent people like you from ever becoming president. Quit your daydreaming, melonhead!”

  90. Lazy Media says at 1:54 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: I like how he spells “calamites.” Silly winger, it’s “catamites.” You guys oughta know how to spell that word; it’s central to your love lives, after all.

  91. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:00 am, October 8th, 2008

    Lazy Media: Seriously terrible, and luckily with little influence. Let’s keep it that way at the very least.

  92. HuskyMescan says at 2:01 am, October 8th, 2008

    StrangelyBrown: John can call him President Obama. Then John can sit down then wither away into the dustbin of bad history.

  93. HuskyMescan says at 2:04 am, October 8th, 2008

    and then i close my bold tag

  94. druranium says at 2:04 am, October 8th, 2008

    PentagonBookkeeper: You should get a job with a cable news network. There is a vast yearning for this type of analysis. Unfortunately, it would crush your soul.
    I need to re-read fear and loathing on the campaign trail 72 right now.

  95. claytor says at 2:08 am, October 8th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: Do you mean Canadians or people who watch presidential debates in their underwear?

  96. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:14 am, October 8th, 2008

    Stupid Facts about Phoenix:

    “Originally, the phoenix was identified by the Egyptians as a stork or heron-like bird called a benu, known from the Book of the Dead and other Egyptian texts as one of the sacred symbols of worship at Heliopolis, closely associated with the rising sun and the Egyptian sun-god Ra.
    the word appears in Psalm 92:12 [LXX Psalm 91:13], but in that passage it actually refers to a palm tree, not a mythological bird.[3] However, it was the flourishing of Christian Hebraist interpretations of Job 29:18 that brought the Joban phoenix to life for Christian readers of the seventeenth century.

  97. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:16 am, October 8th, 2008

    claytor: I couldn’t even imagine a Canadian right now. So cold. So lonely. So MAVERICK.

  98. PentagonBookkeeper says at 2:19 am, October 8th, 2008

    druranium: Thanks for your reply. Speaking of cable news, really reminds me how much I miss Tim Russert, especially on wild nights like this.

  99. druranium says at 2:21 am, October 8th, 2008

    jimh: I was having flashbacks about Mr. Burns running for office while watching this debate. When will McCain try to eat dinner at a voters home and spit a mouthful of mutant fish across the table? Only then will this election cycle be complete.

  100. Simple Disaster says at 2:29 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate:

    please don’t chastise yourself on my account!

  101. druranium says at 2:44 am, October 8th, 2008

    PentagonBookkeeper: Yes, wish he could have hung in there with ted and watched barry take office. Take care of your heart

  102. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 2:51 am, October 8th, 2008

    schvitzatura: Supah Five isn’t “That One” if he completes his passes.. Oft times, Marty Morningwood is “That One” for his stupid play calls. Akers is quickly becoming a questionable “That One”(?)

    PentagonBookkeeper: Yes, the ‘Thorazine’ Shuffle as I know it.. (I guess you could attach that to any antipsychotic dopamine medication). Mellaril Shuffle?

    Simple Disaster: I don’t merely chastise myself, I’m a cutter. I wear hairshirts from time to time– best time: Sunday. I was baptized Catholic. The guilt runs so deep..

  103. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:54 am, October 8th, 2008

    claytor: The people who watch the debate in their underwear deserve total love. Do you not respect Walnuts at all?

  104. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 2:58 am, October 8th, 2008

    You know, before we all get to high and mighty, lets not forget that McCain signed a letter!

  105. claytor says at 2:59 am, October 8th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: Now, as a Canadian, every morning I look out the window, and I can see Sarah Palin looking out her window at Russia. Russia doesn’t seem to notice her for some reason. No one seems to be using the pay-per-use “Look at Alaska’s Governor” telescopes.

    My friends…in Canada we rarely refer to ourselves with cool fighter jet type names like “Maverick”. I am not even shure if we have fighter jets, but I think we should. We need to walk fast with an Teflon-coated insulated stick. It is cold up here, but our weather economy is sound. As you know, my friends, without the cold we would not be able to build important, main street igloo’s. I will not increase weather taxes for anyone. If you live in in the -10 to -43 degree bracket, your Block Ice tax will not increase.

    My friends, you know who hates maple syrup? That one.

  106. claytor says at 3:01 am, October 8th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: I respect the name Walnuts.

  107. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 3:02 am, October 8th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts:
    Stupid Facts about Phoenix: Joe Arpaio has been Sheriff/Media Whore for the past 16 years.

  108. druranium says at 3:13 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: PentagonBookkeeper: When I was in high school, we used to do the ‘pills we found in peoples cupboards’ shuffle. Ok, still do it with opportunity, but with an elitist attitude (BOO antidepressants and antihistamines, YAY benzos and opiates)
    Fuck, I’m glad none of us have aspired to the presidency. Scary.

  109. druranium says at 3:22 am, October 8th, 2008

    claytor: did you know that putin is looking at your country too? Please see the associated info-graphic:
    http://www.boingboing.net/images/x_2008/putinrearshishead.jpg
    my friends, eyes, a kay a gee and a bee, etc.
    p.s. second holocaust, stinking corpse, etc.

  110. gurukalehuru says at 3:25 am, October 8th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: My favorite part of the Lowry article was when he said that McCain might be winning if it weren’t for all the calamites. I think it’s high time we invaded Calamia.

  111. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 3:35 am, October 8th, 2008

    druranium: Jeez, back when I was fifteen all we could get was Vivarin and NoDoz. Strange, I wouldn’t even have thought during that time to raid my mother’s medicine cabinet, but I did replace her Vodka with water. Ahh, cigarettes were 1.35 at convenience stores and nobody carded. There were cigarette machines everywhere.. You could still give a crankhead three bucks and he’d go get two 40’s for ya.. Those were the days.

  112. druranium says at 3:52 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Thanks to the everloving allknowing drug companies, pills of a garden variety are a mainstay! Ask your doctor about one of the many problems you may now be experiencing in life. as a child, i also replaced many liters of gin and vodka in my parents collection with water. Then they got wise and put a lock on the cabinet. damn it all! Finally, found a “meat market” in town that would sell me as many quarts of malt liquor as i could carry. Have a nice day indeed.

  113. space stout says at 4:03 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: vivarin and nodoz? wow, sorry you had to hit up your Sev for drugs- my mom’s medicine cabinet held the wonders of valium… No flourescent lights or 40’s at home, but my lovely little yellow friend made up for it all…

  114. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 4:32 am, October 8th, 2008

    druranium: space stout: I’m old, man.. I was into the booze primarily back then. Vivarin made me want to throw up (after taking five and going to work for 5 hours telemarketing) I was a sophomore in high school but my mom told me I had to get a job– she basically copied a copy and forged my birthdate to be one year prior. I worked 20 hours a week telemarketing, taking the bus everywhere and going to school. I woke up at 6:00 am, went to school till 2:10, rode a bus and hung out at the mall till 4:30 then walked to my job and worked until 10pm. Luckily, I got a ride home from co-workers that felt sorry for me.

    Drug companies are great, aren’t they? I’m currently on Zoloft to take the ‘edge’ off my anger and lorazepam which allows me to be a functioning alcoholic. I haven’t seen my father since 1985 (he’s still a photographer for a PA paper) and don’t talk to my disgusting boomer bitch ‘competitor’ of a mother.

    Anyway, I’m going to vote early tomorrow.
    Dziekuje!

  115. Jukesgrrl says at 4:38 am, October 8th, 2008

    jimh: Ah, Jim, you’ve creatively mentioned that everytime WALNUTS! says the name “Petraeus,” “little hearts swirl around like so many liver spots.” And that nut from the the National Reviews sees “little starbursts [shooting] through [his] TV screen” every time Palin winks at “him.” I thought it was Democrats who were on the hallucinogens? Aren’t Republicans supposed to stick to Scotch, which should only make them see bugs crawling up their walls?

  116. druranium says at 4:48 am, October 8th, 2008

    I broke drywall in my house (sober) due to anger last week. I’m glad you’ve got a steady supply of benzos to keep you ok! you have been through a lot more than me. I had kind of a cushy rebellious youth but moved out at 18 or 19. I only saw a friend almost go in for a telemarketing job. We all knew it was bullshit but hey it pays five bucks an hour! That could add up! That building has been 15 other businesses in 10 years and its probably gonna get bulldozed soon.
    G’Night to you too, I think.

  117. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 4:54 am, October 8th, 2008

    Jukesgrrl: No, I think Repubs are definitely pharmaceutical whores. (Wonderful lobby, why not partake?) That’s why Reagan evoked a Disneyesque affectation in his speeches and why McCain tries to sound like Reagan. Or maybe McCain has alzheimers, who knows? It’s an old man ladypill thing and it’s consistent with Republicans.

  118. druranium says at 4:56 am, October 8th, 2008

    Jukesgrrl: Fantastic point!
    it is the conservatives who seem to be on the hardcore drugs this year. They make fun of the other side for “drinking the kool aid”
    Which only reinforces the notion that they (the party loyalists to the bitter fucking end) are ENTIRELY completely out of their gourds
    on some kinda doped up kool aid
    doncha you betcha!@

  119. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 5:08 am, October 8th, 2008

    druranium: Don’t do that, you’ll only hurt your hand(s). You don’t want a boxer’s break (doesn’t hurt but can be annoying afterward). I swear, time really does heal all wounds. In my experience, I mellowed, but have never forgotten..
    (seriously) Good night!

  120. SisterTruth says at 6:53 am, October 8th, 2008

    Obama totally needed a Sidney Poitier from in The Heat of the Night” moment. Remember Steiger asks him what they call him up North and Poitier says, “They call me Mr. Tibbs.” So Barack Obama should have said in a really deep voice, “They Call Me Senator Obama.” Also, he should have slapped McCain like Sidney Poitier did the crazy old white guy later in the film, but I guess that wouldn’t have gone over very well. I think any Black people in this country who haven’t registered to vote are going to be motivated by “that one” because it is clear that McCain is going to try to put white men calling black men “boy” into the constitution. I’m still freaking out. Definitely the most racially shocking moment in American politics. That one’s going down in history.

  121. druranium says at 6:53 am, October 8th, 2008

    thanks smokefilledroomate. you are good.

  122. SisterTruth says at 6:59 am, October 8th, 2008

    Oops. I mean the most shocking moment in televised American politics. There have been more shocking things in general (like lynching).

  123. The Neoskeptic says at 7:36 am, October 8th, 2008

    love the JAZZ HANDS on the “might never know” line.

  124. “Terrible Clamities”

  125. ihasasad says at 8:31 am, October 8th, 2008

    Hai! Likey your coverage of that one and the other one! Please uses this picture for every new entry from now until the end of days! Kaithanxbai!
    http://static.crooksandliars.com/files/uploads/2008/09/mccain-obama-punch.jpg

  126. MISTAHCOUGHDROP says at 8:36 am, October 8th, 2008

    Morning… just heard some guy on C-span radio say the lighting was such that… or maybe Hopey was campaigning in Florida…but he seemed “blacker…darker… in the debates last night…and well, sinister Americans… ”

    A whiter shade of pale?

    I just created a new poster for white people : http://storefrontwindows.blogspot.com/

  127. Bypartizoa says at 8:40 am, October 8th, 2008

    “And you know who voted for it? MISS THING!

  128. Delicious says at 8:41 am, October 8th, 2008
  129. jodyleek says at 8:58 am, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: McGramps tries to sound like Reagan, but he comes off like Nixon.

  130. shellbomber says at 9:24 am, October 8th, 2008

    I was playing the drinking game that calls for a chug after every “my friends”. I can’t believe I’m alive to tell the story.

  131. rocktonsammy says at 9:24 am, October 8th, 2008

    President Obama or Sir will be easy for Crankypants to remember come Jan 20.

  132. BigDupa says at 9:42 am, October 8th, 2008

    How fast til we see a bumper sticker that says “I’m voting for that one!”

  133. Varchar says at 9:51 am, October 8th, 2008

    McCain knows you can’t say “nigger” on TV.

  134. Varchar says at 9:58 am, October 8th, 2008
  135. huffybike says at 10:32 am, October 8th, 2008

    John McCain, Class Act: http://tinyurl.com/4a44zt

  136. ihasasad says at 11:05 am, October 8th, 2008

    An anagram for ‘That One’ is ‘A Ten, Hot’. Yeah baby!

  137. druranium: “I’d still rather keep the dollar…”

  138. Strong are the bitters in that one.

  139. Schadenfried says at 1:38 pm, October 8th, 2008

    facehead: Doesn’t seem like, than again, I didn’t see the clip because I don’t need my blood pressure any hire. With that said, McCain is a dick (stating the obvious, I know). It pisses me off that my BFF’s mom died suddenly a few weeks ago, but this guy still alive. Asshole.

  140. Schadenfried says at 1:39 pm, October 8th, 2008

    Schadenfried: Shit, it should be “higher.”

  141. iolanthe says at 2:24 pm, October 8th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: If McCain’s on antipsychotic meds, I don’t think they’re working all that well …

  142. PentagonBookkeeper says at 3:38 pm, October 8th, 2008

    It just occured to me that it was the “Navane Shuffle” I was thinking about when watching the Old Man meander around last night in Nashville. Thanks to the internets, I found the shuffle actually has a name - “Akathesia”. For a deeper understanding that is the tragicomedy of one Mr. S, I found this brief history: http://www.mindfreedom.org/personal-stories/snedecorscottp/

  143. DangerousLiberal says at 3:48 pm, October 8th, 2008

    Worlds End: Hannity said he’s a journalist? Yeah, the way I am a nobel prize winning scientist. Dickhead. “Let me finish”? He never let the other dude start.

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