Wonkette
This is the first time your editor has really paid attention to those squiggly lines on the CNN independent voter torture graph. Wow! The uncommitted voters of Ohio do not like this John McCain character. The only time we’ve seen a real happy response to McCain was when he was talking very generally (and quite well) about America’s history as a “peacekeeper.” (Ha.) And then he had to snarl and say “this isn’t the time for on-the-job training,” and the male and female lines went down like the stock market. What does it mean?
10:30 PM — Here, again, is this remarkable clip:
10:30 PM — The debate is over! Thank the American Jesus. Is the American Jesus an Evil Empire? “Maybe, heh heh heh.”
10:30 PM — The last question was obviously from Peggy Noonan. Brokaw described it as “zen,” and it was “What don’t you know.” So, now you do know Peggy’s column in this Friday’s Wall Street Journal.
10:31 PM — Your editor made dinner at 4:30 p.m., Pacific time, took his hike with the dog at 3:30 p.m., and now he is deep in the second bottle of wine, at 7:32 p.m. Pacific or 10:32 p.m. Eastern or whatever time it is, in Nashville. (”Pickin’ time!”)
10:33 PM — McCain doesn’t know what the unexpected will be, because nobody knows what a map is? Why is he talking about “comrades”? Why is he a Soviet?
10:34 PM — The Ohio voters love that part, until he talks about the tiller. Ergh. Brokaw yells at them for getting in the way of his teleprompter. We are finally done!
10:35 PM — Oh lord, Michelle looks so hot.
10:35 PM — Oh forgive me lord, Cindy looks pretty hot!
10:35 PM — But we will not get a porn wrestling match, only Wolf Blitzer saying that “Senator McCain obviously has some disdain for Senator Obama.” But Obama charmingly sweet talks Cindy (who is looking for a younger man) and then he and Walnuts just spin away from each other. Such hate!
10:38 PM — MSNBC, with Chris Matthews: “And John McCain, out of nowhere, attacks the moderator, Tom Brokaw.” This is that weird point when Brokaw asks both candidates whom they might choose for Treasury, and McCain snarls, “Heh heh, well not you, Tom.” WTF?
10:40 PM — Barack and Michelle are still out there shaking hands, smiling, talking to everyone. McCain and Cindy left!
10:40 PM — Matthews notes that McCain is not willing to jump in the shit-mud with Sarah Palin, so he is “somewhat embarrassed” about Palin reading all this weird racist crap at her rally appearances.
10:42 PM — Switching over to C-SPAN. Barack and Michelle are still there, talking to everyone, walking around, taking pictures with people, what is going on, where is McCain and Cindy?
10:43 PM — So weird. They bolted. And Barry and Michelle are really just individually working the small crowd. Why won’t the people talk about this on CNN and MSNBC?
10:43 PM — Please go to C-SPAN, see what’s going on.
10:43 PM — C-SPAN announcer: “You should know Sen. McCain and his wife Cindy have left.”
10:45 PM — Wow.
10:45 PM — Seriously, switch to C-SPAN. Barack and Michelle are STILL working the room like a private party, and McCain and Cindy are LONG GONE. What is up, did they just surrender, like in Michigan?
10:46 PM — What’s remarkable, here, is that Barry and his wife are doing a thing you’ve seen, if you’ve seen the Clintons work a room, back in the glory days of the 1990s. Totally involved with everyone, smiles, charm, concern, serious looks as they listen.
10:48 PM — What does this MEAN? Why won’t CNN and MSNBC show this video?
10:49 PM — They’re all doing group pictures now, with the Obamas. This has become an Obama private party of supporters.
10:50 PM — And now Barack is talking to a group of well-dressed white men and women, business people, country club types. They’re all nodding and looking serious.
10:53 PM — GO TO C-SPAN, WATCH THIS, IT IS REMARKABLE.
10:59 PM — Our friends at C-SPAN are going to get us some video to embed here, because this was interesting, and you did not see it on CNN, MSNBC, FOX, etc.
11:02 PM — Let’s go to CNN for a bit. What’s her name, the one we love, she just said it was “condescending” the way McCain told that smart young man (but he was black!) that the lower people probably never heard of Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac.
11:05 PM — Paul Begala finally gets around to the Wonkette point, that the Obamas hung out for a half-hour, a very Clintonesque performance.
11:06 PM — Yes, she is back, Campbell Brown, she announces that Obama won, 54% to 30%. McCain’s unfavorables are still 46%.
11:09 PM — Ha ha, “That one” is now the go-to-commercial clip on CNN. And check out the black guy, who asked the question that got McCain to insult him with how black guys wouldn’t know about Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. That guy is right there in the shot, behind Obama. And he visibly winces at the “that one” line.
Ghostface Tiller.
Did you hear Brokaw say (CNN feed) “I was looking for a trap door I could spring” and “with two minutes, it’s the nature of the beast.”
But if Wonkette will hire that British lady I’ll will pledge all my future income to the site.
A clear win for ANAL BLAST!
So.
They’re both fucks.
Fuck.
Ken: In Nashville, it is 1929.
McCain wouldn’t shake Obama’s hand!
CNN head “Tom Browkaw seemed annoyed he had to deal with the masses.”
Fred Barnes on FOX is terribly upset that there were no questions about Abortion or Guns or other cultural issues that no one cares about now that we are in economic armageddon.
“This isn’t the time for on the job training. Meanwhile, meet my VP nominee, the lady who was mayor of Wasilla three weeks ago!”
Frank Lutz group on FOX is having a big Obamagasm. The test subjects are calling McCain on avoiding the questions.
Did McCain and Cindy leave the floor 10 minutes ago? The MSNBC cam has been on Barry and Michelle for a looooong time now.
CNN.com: “We found a female black conservative!!!”
Lionel Hutz Esq.: the same Fred Barnes that thinks George Bush is the new George Washington?
Pawdedoo: They shook hands….. cold hard stare from McCain and cold handshake.. but embalming fluid does that
Just who are these “undecideds,” anyway? I know nobody who is undecided, do you?
i couldn’t watch the Bitters’ dial feedback on my elitist macintosh computer. more on this please!
Oh CNN. So cautious. Saying it’s a tie again.
… it seemed like Obama CLEARLY won.
Wow Obama is working the crowd, of course everyone wants to take a pic with the hotness!!! McCain and Cindy have bolted ummm
Pat Buchanan thinks Walnuts won. Shocker!
For a laugh, head over to NRO’s The Corner right now. Those people are just boiling with rage over the fact that Obama pronounced “Pakistan” and “Taliban” correctly. There’s this weird anti-elite elitism, where all these educated, East Coast media types who work at the National Review are mocking Obama for saying words in a way that no one in fly-over country says them.
Rewatching on CNN and McCain did refuse to shake Obama’s hand, and shoved him off to Cindy.
CNN seems to think that McCain came across grouchy. Which brings up the question of how do you tell a grouchy McCain from a non-grouchy McCain.
Kudlow’s off the fucking rails. “Studies show it’s the best (blow)job creator possible!”
Why does that dessicated old fag hate John McCain?
Dave J.: You probably choose to ignore the times she’s watched the western skies in case the sleeping Russian bear awoke. I call that “pre-on-the-job training”. A steady hand on McCain’s tiller, that’s Sarah’s.
“What does it mean?”
Well, since 1960, whether the party in power in the Oval Office was (R) or (D), when the electorate wanted to “throw the bums out”, the candidate with the least “experience”, HAS ALWAYS WON.
It means experience doesn’t mean shit.
It means that the Bush Legacy is so fucked that the people of Bumfuckistan, PA (OH, NC, wherever) can seriously consider the Son Of A Luo Tribesman to be POTUS.
Anyone notice Cindy wouldn’t touch the anyone?
Fox upset that McCain didn’t suck up to Romney on the Sety of Treasury…..
but all that would have done is remind people just how bad McCain’s VEEp choice really is@@
OMG Everybody there just took a GROUP PHOTO with Barry. It was on CSPAN, so it has to have really happened. The undecided voters are IN THE TANK for the community organizer who actually likes and knows how to work a room full of hobos without planes.
Fred Barnes was mad that they didn’t talk about all the bullshit issues like guns, abortion, and gays.
GAYS ARE FORECLOSING ON YOUR HOUSE!!!
Obamas are still working the crowd
Lionel Hutz Esq.: Fuck you, Frank!!
Wow. Does Jane Hamsher always look like Betty Boop? I don’t mind the look — I just feel like it should be in black and white and she should have a trio of singing ants behind her.
Obama STILL in the house… Johnny Mac??? not so much…
Did you see the track lines move down when McGrommits said, “Vote for me and I’ll buy your house”?
why do americans hate extremely wealthy surgar daddy types?
Mike Duncan is on. Geeze, he’s as forgettable as his name. “I think John McCain was very relaxed tonight.” What?! That nervous, wheezing, grasping ball of creepiness? Oh, my.
reubenfine: No lie, a lady at my job is undecided. I asked her about it and she said she did not like McCain because he is crotchedy and yelly and would yell at her to get off one of his 56 lawns, but she was worried about Obama turning us all into muslims. Then my head exploded as she told me about who will win Dancing with the Stars.
Ohhh McCain is so screwed now. He was counting on his “base” and now HAHHHAA the economy went down the tubes. Now his base is like “ok peeps, the mo’s can get married and you all can have abortions whenever you want, just give us a few tanks of gas and let us keep our moneys.”
If Greta knew voodoo, she’d be in Vegas.
(If I knew voodoo, I’d be in Greta…).
Chairman Duncan waffles on the “that one” question. Oil?!
Someone else on National Review is mad that now, after three debates, no one has brought up the fact that there is nothing that Barry loves more than aborting kindergarteners with his bare hands.
Another NR blogger says the fact that almost half of the debate was spent on the economy and healthcare shows that Brokaw is in the tank for NOOBAMA. Because it’s not like the economy is the biggest issue on most everyone’s mind right now.
Seriously, are these people insane?
McCain heard CourtTV had a Matlock marathon tonite, so he bolted.
My humble analysis:
McCain was stumbling around like a drunk wheezing penguin and kept going on about some fucking “overhead projector” for a planetarium in Illinois. And he mentioned “telegraphing” his intentions. He also used the word “tiller.” On the opposite end of the technological spectrum, Obama talked about “computers.” That’s all you really need to know.
The army guy who asked a question that allowed McCain to smarmily touch him and lie about loving other people in power just got Michelle Obama’s autograph.
Why does McCain sound like an insane Jack Nickelson? Medication?
Did you see that zipper on the back of Micheles dress? hot!
Did you see Cindy wearing a skirt much too short for her age? not hot!
Hopey, well done.
azw88: Being around all these non-millionaires was making Cindy crazy, so she’s gotta score. And McCain has gone off to sing some more tune about killing people with old war vets.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: Yeah, I saw that, Obama put his hand out and McCain turned away. Someone, please pull up the video in high-def slow mo and then send it to every blogger on earth.
I like how John McCain can talk about the future, without a trace of irony as the cold, clammy hand of death gently pushes him as he perambulates awkwardly around the stage.
Worlds End: My theory is that Cindy acts like an abused wife. I’m not joking.
When O’Barry wins, McCan’t will win the consolation prize: a nonstop flight on Air Force One and six weeks all expenses paid at the fabulous Hanoi Hilton.
Heh, The Corner being honest: “This was not a great night for our team. It’s up to the 527’s now I think. I don’t know how else to get the negatives about Obama out there.”
Oh my — cnn.com is interviewing an exert in “facial coding.” They’ll be cutting up bird entrails shortly.
The msnbc focus group looks great for obama, not so much for Abraham J. Simpson
sanantonerose: It’s not an act.
sanantonerose: Hello. Pink cast. Carpal tunnel my ass.
Melanoma be damned, McCain needs a tan. He has the glow of a thousand white suns.
Every time McCanine comes close to us in the audience we whispers “Who’s got his meds?” he scare us.
…I don’t know about you guys, but I’m voting for “That One”!
jagorev: Why, yes. The National Review people are insane.
I think this debate is the 2008 equivalent of Dole falling off the stage. He’s old, and now everyone really knows it.
Holy crap — Debbie Wasserman-Schulz is a hippie!
Tom Brokaw comes off grumpy too. He’s backstage now giving John a foot massage. I miss Tim Russert. I really do.
That One/Hobo Joe 2008!
Look at how much more traffic Wonkette has now. I am proud to be in this cuntry.
sanantonerose:That’s because as McCain says “At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt.” So I’m inclined to agree with you.
I could be wrong, but I don’t think McCain mentioned his POW status once in this thing. I’m floored.
what the hell was on Abe Simpson’s wrist?
tyrantkitty: I believe that was a Navy guy, a former CPO, just like CPO Sharkey, as memorably portrayed by Don Rickles.
AngryBlakGuy: Geeze, that was a vile moment. My dial went to minus 11.
Soledad O’Brien’s little group says Obama won by 12 to 11 (out of 25). I think Obama won pretty decisively, but what the hell.
tyrantkitty: Marines or Navy guy for what it’s worth, the Army doesn’t have Chief Petty Officers
This election is giving me an ulcer! I never, ever again want to hear the term ‘my friend’. It’s all dirty and condescending and manipulat-y now. On another note, why isn’t the new Rolling Stone article on McCain not making any waves? Perhaps I just haven’t seen it yet.
CNN’s Jeffery “baseball” Toobin brought up McCain and hair transplants….. said McCain will have time for it now… OUCH.
AngryBlakGuy: Seriously WTF was that about!
After watching this, amidst my whiskey buzz and working on some jython code, I’ve come to the conclusion that McCain just got mauled by The One. This is potential electoral catastrophe for gramps. …and supposedly this was his venue.
They should film every moment on Nov 5 of Sarah when her and her 15 pregnant babies board that plane and head to Methilla.
FidelCatro: I noticed that, too. He was really invading people’s personal space.
It can be hard to judge when you’re watching at home, but I thought he was kinda icky.
Putter putter putter all Mr. McC does is putter around the stage of the debate, I keep waiting for him to light his pipe and dab some graphite on the chain of his three wheeler.
Thank you Ken Layne…You are my HERO….
sanantonerose: He also talked about putting medical records “online” when the topic was computerizing them. The Luddite type of old Fogey’s don’t know the difference. At least he didn’t suggest sticking them on Youtube or on the Google.
“Frannie Mae” said ye old McCain. Did anyone notice that?
hamletta: Thanks for the clarification - I did get a little agitated and distracted when he was talking, thinking it was an IN THE TANK final question for Shecky the Humor Campaigner.
McCain straight up bailed because there is apparently a TruckNutz™ bonanza at Walmart Supercenter #659 on Charlotte Pike in Nashville, TN
Here’s Cardboard Debate Recap for yins all:
-Our economic troubles can be directly attributed to the KGB taking all of our maps.
-Handwashing is not allowed in Afghanistan, so your will be required to use your $5000 insurance credit to get medical care across the state line in Pakistan.
-We are friends, and I reserve my “bad touches” for the veterans of this great Peacemaker nation. Do not be afraid of my pastyness. “That one” stole my tinted moisturizer.
I’m ElmoCain and I approve this message!
Dave J.: I wonder if Obama deliberately raised his arm up in greeting to the crowd at the start, in contrast to McCain who can’t do that anymore. If I was Obama, I would have suggested everyone in the room do some jumping jacks to drive that point home.
WoundedVeteran: Dude, you are MY hero.
Lewis Black on McCain owning foreign automobiles: The man spent FIVE AND A HALF years in a Vietnamese prison camp. Doesn’t he deserve to own 3 reliable cars?
I wish to do dirty, dirty things to Rachel Maddow. However, I strongly suspect that she may play for the other team (or perhaps you would say the same team).
Mark Preston: “John McCain needed a game-changer tonight and he did not get it.” Saying it’s a tie. However, his poll said 54-30 Obama victory. Is Preston resigning for reasons of incompetence? No?!
At the next Operation Palin and Walnuts rally, the new slogan:
Who’s gonna take care of this of… feel free to elaborate..
No “game changer” tonight.
The game remains as it was.
We win.
Pawdedoo: The non handshake is now up:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WI0iIOqPGak
Tonight McCain came to terms with the inevitable, that he has lost this election. Well, that’s how I read the ‘hasty retreat’ body language. I bet he whispered into Cindy’s ear ” that was my last and best shot, I have nothing left, let’s get the hell outta here”.
Ken Layne:
SO I SEE YOU HAVE FOND ANUDER MAAN. U wil pay foor thiis, Ken Layne.
Balls!: Don’t say such things about Rachel. She’s the boyfriend I never had. I love her — absolutely knows her shit every time.
Tonight McCain came to terms with the inevitable, that he has lost this election. Well, that’s how I read the ‘hasty retreat’ body language. I bet he whispered into Cindy’s ear ” that was my best last shot, I have nothing left, let’s get the hell outta here”.
Did any one notice McCain said the government needed to buy the bad mortgages. I’m not sure if he understands that’s what the bailout is. The getting lost on stage only strengthens my suspicions that he has Alzheimers.
Dick Cheney’s on the phone right now, ordering a terrorist attack on the Sears Tower.
Balls!: Right there with ya.
I want John McCain to buy my house. Or at least to paint it. I will provide the paint and brushes. Also the beer.
Holy fuck, and not to offend those of you who ARE bald, but it creeped me out, the bank of chrome domes, among the independent voters, in that audience. It was sort of like one of those science fiction movies. OK, i’ll shut up now.
As partisan as I am, I can’t imagine any McCain supporter feeling good about tonight.
On second thought, it’s John McCain, so BYOB
When McC says tally-ban I keep thinking of Whinny The Poo in The Trouble With Heffalumps.
Balls!: The line forms behind me. Rachel is ALL woman.
And sadly, for another woman.
spencer: It’s cause McCain feels he has to set preconditions to negotiate with terrorists.
get that out to the mainstream media about the mccains leaving,that’s…dare i say… nutty.
Balls!: who cares what team??
Worlds End: WadISay: …in WALNUTS! defense, at least he didn’t accuse some random black guy of not knowing what Fannie Mae or Freddy Mac was, despite the fact that he asked him specific question about the subject! Errrrr, oops never mind.
the NYT blog is good for something (funny): ‘But [McCain] also, on two occasions, referred to his hero Teddy Roosevelt, citing his famous statement about the need to “speak softly and carry a big stick” — Roosevelt actually said “walk softly and carry a big stick.” Mr. McCain chastised Senator Obama for speaking too loudly..’
…can one of you nice white people please explain to me what “Fannie Mac” and “Freddy Mae” are?
David Brooks also called it for Obama.
AngryBlakGuy:
Oh great. THAT ONE is asking a question.
spencer: Honestly I think John McCain was just freaked out by his awful performance and was so full of nervous energy he didn’t know what he was doing, introduced his wife and just kept chugging along as though if he stopped for a second that plastered-on smile was going to fall right off his face and shatter into a thousand pieces.
He wasn’t being disrespectful — he was just trying so hard not to burst into tears and beat his head against the floor that he forgot what he was doing. Not that that’s to his credit or anything.
sanantonerose:
I humbly agree. I didn’t hear any of the commentators say anything about the “penguin shuffle”. He really looked (and sounded) unstable. “Hand-on-tiller” notwithstanding. (Well, it was past his bedtime!) And that bit about the “overhead projector” was hilarious. Watta loser.
Balls!: Rachel Maddow is full out hardcore lesbian and has been since her undergrad years: http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/27987463.html#cutid1
She’s been so out loud and proud for so long people just got bored talking about it……
spencer: Thanks. McCain is a pure evil fuck, he made his wife shake that niggra’s hand!!
The comment about Cheney and the Sears Tower isn’t all that funny, unfortunately. I’m guessing the Wasilla Assembly of Whatever is praying for a terrorist attack to wipe out millions–in San Francisco. Double win the them: Walnuts only chance to win, a bunch of sodomites taken out and they can say See, God really, really hates gays.
Johnny ‘Qeeg’ McCain….. “Strawberries,…. I used logic to prove I’m right.”
AngryBlakGuy: That was a weird thing. I guess when you’re on your thirteenth home you may forget that most of us who are still on on the first home had to research Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac. But if “economics is not your strong suit” and you’re millionaire wife can pay for everything by selling a dress, I guess you can get by in life not knowing who they are.
To these asshats on CNN, the undecideds… if you can’t figure it out by now then you should just kill yourself. You have failed at life.
Lord, please forgive me, but I’d like to plant my seed in that glorious negro woman. (Talking about Michelle, not Gwen Ifil)
professor.cj: …gawd, Rachel was not cute back in the days. Who would have figured she would turn into LILF?!
Well this is disturbing
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2008/10/7/165650/170/561/621837
Beans: actually, technically, it was a funny comment.
druranium: That’s being a bit rough. You should LET THEM CONFESS TO IT after the election is over. And then crucify them.
itgetter: …you think you can pull some strings and get me a subprime mortgage? I have terrible credit, no collateral, no source of income, no SSN but I am black! Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh say that’s all I need!!!
The overhead projector he was talking about is pretty much what runs the planetarium. It wasn’t the kind that you write on with magic markers. If every year it inspires a couple kids to be an engineer, physicist or other scientist, it’s worth it.
http://www.adlerplanetarium.org/education/index.shtml
Of course, if you’re still convinced the world is flat, I could see you having philosophical issues with it.
AngryBlakGuy: It’s because of you that people like John McCain might have to sell one of their innumerable houses. You, sir, make me sick. SICK.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to reinforce the corners of my new cardboard home with duct tape.
Worlds End: WTF. That can’t be real… can it? We’re sooo fucked if McPalin are elected. I just got douche chills.
“And now you see just WHY Palin is so damn dangerous–and why there’s things like imprecatory prayers for McCain’s death. Palin is seen, literally, as one of their Chosen–one of the few that, in their view, is sufficiently “in line” with Joel’s Army theology to establish their own little Republic of Gilead, where anyone who doesn’t toe the line will be driven out or killed.”
shortsshortsshorts: I made this statement when I was sober. Now that the alcohol is coursing through my veins i feel kind of bad. but still….i don’t understand the thinking. imagine it involves breaking through large amounts of indoctrination. (A Vast Variety!)
PLEASE - get the CSPAN post-debate video up!
And, alas - I figured the “overhead projector” thing had to be a McOldNutz scam; I wish Obama had been able to send that one back into M’s face…
There’s 10 minutes of it on http://debatehub.c-span.org/ , under the “Additional Coverage” tab.
oldguy: You can’t link to it directly, but if you visit the CSPAN page (via the link in Ken’s debate blog), you can watch the post-debate footage. Pretty amazing stuff.
It was like watching a diseased featherless parrot squawk at a handsome brilliant moviestar.