Charming Loser Dukakis Says Obama Will Win, Probably

America never really had an occasion to think about Michael Dukakis for about oh TWENTY YEARS until he showed up in a niceNYTgraphic yesterday proving, conclusively, that he could never have defeated George H.W. Bush in an election because he was half a foot shorter. Dukakis was a hilarious failure of a candidate, and now he says the Obama campaign is doing better than his did, which is a true and obvious statement.

Here are some things we have learned from this article about Michael Dukakis in theObserver:

• Dukakis is 74 whole years old! That makes him just two years older, and an inch taller, than another doomed presidential candidate we have heard of.

• He called John McCain's vice presidential pick "a pathetic selection."

• He hasn't really spoken with Joe Biden for 21 years, because it was a Dukakis guy who leaked a videotape of Biden plagiarizing the hell out of some teabag politician, which effectively killed Biden's presidential candidacy back there in 1987.

Oh and Michael Dukakis "love[s Joe Biden's] affection for Amtrak," which is kinky.

 Dukakis on the Election: Obama Knows How to Win, 'McCain Has Nothing' [New York Observer]