Wonkette
CONTEST OVER, THANKS FOR PLAYING! Now that we’re all poor and soon there will be no Internet or TeeVee, it’s time to learn to read again! How would you like to win Eleven (11) new political books from Hachette Book Group USA? You would like that a lot, we bet.
Here’s how it works: Your Wonkette will pick Five (5) lucky winners based on our usual made-up contest rules, which will be, let’s see ….
Oh, how about this? With the subject line RON PAUL WAS RIGHT; SEND ME GOLDEN BOOK AMEROS, send us an email message explaining in Seven (7) words why America owes you this fancy collection of books including Mike’s Election Guide, Goodnight Bush and some comical right-wing books you can give to your parents or whatever in lieu of actual purchased holiday gifts this winter. (NO CUSS WORDS YOU SLIMEBAGS. USE YOUR “LIBERAL ARTS” DEGREE, FOR ONCE.)
Uh, one entry per entry, U.S. and Canada mailing addresses only, no P.O. boxes, etc. OK!
What, no Ann Coulter?
Do Not Want
Hey! Where did that article about Tina Fey, our new alien overlord, go?
I liked that cooky little article. And I, for one, look forward to our new alien overlord’s quirky flavor of elitist satire.
it’s time to learn to read again!
Not as long as my body is still producing semen.
Worst. Prizes. Ever.
Thanks but no thanks…I’m still reading my legacy collection of Hustler and I think the pictures are probably a whole lot better.
Aaaah. If I win, I can burn them for warmth. That might give me an extra couple of hours.
um, i’d rather read 11 books by our marvelous editors. /suckup
I think we just need a gigantic, all-nation showing of An American Carol. That would bring us together, holding hands in silent rage at how much it sucked.
How about,
I’d rather slit my wrists. Wait. Two more words. Writer’s block. Ok. That makes 7.
Ron Paul was right. Send me golden book Ameros.
Seven words without swearing? Hard to do.
This is a trick. They know none of us can bring ourselves to send an email with that subject line.
MathewBrooks: HaHA! Speak for yourself!
So what email do we use? Should I just spam all of wonkette with my entry/viagra ads?
hmmm… what’s a cuss word? does context matter? “I swallow democracy whole” seems like a fine (if fairly loaded statement–heh heh), but………
When are entries due, Ken?
I will kill again. Three more? Stab, stab, stab.
It should have been more difficult, like a haiku:
Oh how I would love
This collection of “wisdom”
Looks like great kindling.
The sarcastic tone of this site seems to imply that….Ron Paul wasn’t right. That can’t be accurate.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
Gopherit v2.0:
These books are shitty.
What about all of the porn,
lying around there?
how can I read in winter with no electricity? can I power a 15 watt lightbulb through shivering?
Gopherit v2.0: That whole haiku thing is so web 1.0
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/donotwant.jpg
Lascauxcaveman: We can’t afford web 2.0 anymore.
WadISay: Repetitive. You must have been a marketing major.
Indian Cuisine:
Chicken Manchurian or
Hopi Hominy?
S.Luggo: there’ll be a snark tax soon. and this place will become silent.
Screw that! Buy my book, MISTER ROSE’S ABC BOOK. We’ll have to get back to the basics, people (P.S. There’s plenty of “drinking” letters here!) Get one for your kids, and then one for yourself:
http://lalandedigitalpress.blogspot.com/2007/12/mister-roses-abc-little-book-for-little.html