• February 14, 2012

Trying. To keep. Blood pressure. Down. Musn’t DIE. Watching the lady lie about literally everything. Oh, she has some complete sentences alright. “Congratulations.” You’re still not a human though! STILL NOT THERE! Oh and Joe — less numbers! We realize numbers are your defense mechanism whenever you really want to say “SHUT THE HELL UP FRAUDBOT,” but still. Here’s the pre-blog and part 1.

9:31 — Palin reinforces her position that “it doesn’t matter” whether global warming is man-made or not. REALLY? Then how are we supposed to solve it, if we don’t know what causes it? This is an actual logical fallacy. You decide how to act on issues based on the mistakes of the past. This is called, what is that thing, “the study of history.”
9:32 — Thank you Joe for just saying that to her. Oh now he wants to drill. He wants to drill? Sure, why not.
9:33 — Palin says that we are “raping the intercontinental shelf,” for some reason. What is this now? That sounds like a “rape” joke and it’s racist. Also: would she make the intercontinental shelf pay for a rape kit? Saves tax money!
9:34 — Joe Biden explains his plan to poison the Chinese with coal-cleanin’ jobs. “Look, no one cars about the damn Orientals, lady,” he says.
9:36 — Joe also wants to give the gays some rights or whatever the hell they want, fur coats, whatever.
9:38 — Sarah Palin won’t let the gays have any rights because they may want to get married at some time, AND THEN WHAT? It’s their choice, they know the implications.
9:40 — Gwen, who is in the tank because she writes blaxpoitation scripts about the Obamas for the Black Panthers, makes fun of Sarah Palin and says it’s time to talk about foreign policy.
9:41 — [Surge crap talk for a while. Barack Obama didn't like the Surge and John McCain didn't like the Surge so much as he liked killing people in general, for more years, etc.] STUFF HAPPENED.
9:42 — Biden lays out his plan to leave Iraq in 16 months, clearly.
9:43 — Ha ha, Sarah Palin is silent for a few seconds and then spits at Joe, “YOU ARE RAISING THE WHITE FLAG OF SURRENDER.” That’s one of the lines she memorized or saw George Bush say on the teevee in 2005 during her once-yearly “check the news” day, in which she watches the Leno monologue.
9:46 — Joe Biden gives more facts about foreign policy for two minutes, whatever, no one cares. Oh, Sarah Palin knows that there’s sand in the Middle East, and pretty camels! She is CRUSHING HIM in the expectations game.
9:47 — Sarah Palin’s response. We just had like 50 things we wanted to comment on but now we forget them all. Let’s just say she squealed at one point, about Muslim hatred. Oh, here’s one: she said “nucular” and her CNN independent Ohio voter chart SKYROCKETED in happiness. Otherwise, they hate her.
9:48 — Joe’s look is hilarious. He is DYING to go at her. Instead he just says the word “TALK” repeatedly. It’s his safe word to shut out the hate demons. Anyway, Joe Biden wants to talk to the Muslims.
9:52 — Sarah just thanked Joe for liking Israel, because she does too! OMG they have so much in common!!! They’re like the same person and should date. Joe, for one, could use a solid hate-fuck right now.
9:56 — She just talked for five minutes about how she will reform, uh, the various foreign policies, and that it doesn’t matter what George Bush did — everyone screws up! — but it does matter that the past happened, because things that happened in the past are, uh, former events, and former events… nucular weapons. They hate America! Reform, they call the… it’s Maverick. George Bush is the thing that no maverick weapons, kill Americans will they?! Oh and Afghanistan about Gwen? Maverchanger sand Bush happy flower fart die.
10:02 — Oh god is the site down? Thanks Sarah. Ken’s turn, if this thing ever comes back on.

{ 310 comments }

graceless October 2, 2008 at 9:31 pm

New thread, and I found it!

StripesAndPlaids October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

Like trying to debate an oil slick on water, that Sarah. You can’t pin her down, she is all over the place, but she is really shiny!

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

She picked her nose….

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

Sarah Palin supports capping the East Coast.

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

Palin still hasn’t realized that “Drill Baby Drill” is directed toward her.

mirrorball October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

and the CNN chart goes DOWN when she said “drill baby drill”

Crab1 October 2, 2008 at 9:32 pm

I’ll tap THAT domestic energy source!

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

Drill baby drill????

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

If she keeps looking at the camera and reciting a campaign speech, Gwen is gunna throw a bottle of Evian at her.

Slabgorb October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

Drill here, drill now! Everywhere!

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

Environmentally friendly offshore drilling? WTF?

President Beeblebrox October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

I want to dig my eyes out with my own fingers.

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

What in the hell is she talking about? Nukuler?

ProfessorJukes October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

She may survive… she’s going to stick to her script.
We just need Gwen to give an out-of-the-blue question that she doesn’t have a pre-scripted answer to… but then she’ll just pick a pre-scripted answer at random.

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:33 pm

Gwen’s doing great. Don’t know how O’Reilly & Limbaugh can spin this.

graceless October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Yay Gwen!

angryhippopotamus October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Americans are hungry for delicious delicious oil.

Luke Warm October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

If the continental shelf gets raped, will Palin charge it for the examination kit?

Urbanachiever October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Dude, the correct nomenclature is “Drill Baby Drill”

tsunami October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

whew…one of my ex wives used to talk that fast…but it was the meth.

Scarab October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Did she just call him O’Biden?

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Okay I’m just drinking on principle here now.

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

“Rope Line” sounds dirty.

stopsmiling October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Someone already took a drill to Mcain’s face. Drill MORE!

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Okay, so so far, it seems as if Joe is running for himself and Palin is running for Miss Alaska

cal October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

[re=119793]simetrias[/re]: I’d like to see Gwen open a can of whupass on her.

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Oh. Snap. Go Joe. Way to call the crazy lady on always talking a bout McCain and not her own thoughts!

gradgrind October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

Wow — she thinks people not pre-approved by her campaign committee are chanting “drill baby drill” — and that chants make xlnt policy?!

Pradajames October 2, 2008 at 9:34 pm

if the outer continental shelf got pregnant through us raping it, would Palin be ok with it getting an abortion?

ProfessorJukes October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

OOOOhh!!! Now we’re talkin’ ’bout the gays!!!
WHOO-hoo!!!

jagorev October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

I’m watching this somewhat attractive former sportscaster talk about how people are yearning to drill, how there is a hunger to tap something, how it’s not really rape if the drilling is safe… I don’t know what she’s talking about anymore, but it’s making me so hard.

justshocking October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

Senator O’Biden…

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

gawd she can’t say nuclear either! Dumb C***

Queen Regine October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

Dear God,

I HATE her. Please forgive me.

QR

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

Well, Biden is gay for teh gayez. That is your pull quote on talk radio tomorrow.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

Marriage between one man and one moose….

busybusybusy October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

What the hell? Where’s the “SUGARTITS”? Wonkette self-censorship?

thedownlows October 2, 2008 at 9:35 pm

so if mother earth gets raped, does she still have to pay for her own rape kit?

Schilde October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

she’s a sadist

tsunami October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

[re=119815]Scarab[/re]: yes

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

The traditional definition of marriage was that the woman was the man’s property.

Slabgorb October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

Palin seems to be on my teevee a lot in splitscreen while Joey B is yapping.

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

Yeah, she’s from a diverse family – they own three different brands of snow machines.

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

As long as they don’t try to get married. Or adpot. Or have choices.

cspurgeon October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

More and more I’m just staring at the photo of Dar Williams over to the left, hoping she’ll walk in and turn off the TV.

Dr. Zoidberg October 2, 2008 at 9:36 pm

[re=119811]Luke Warm[/re]: Win! Ok, everyone can go home now.

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

‘I have a very diverse family’… hmmmm… who exactly is she referring to? Willow, the mommy to be?

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

“One Man And One Woman” is the archaic language? The polygamists slapped that down, I bleeve. In the last couple of years all I hear is “A Man And A Woman”, unless Congress is actually wild about Jean-Paul Belmondo and Anouk Aimee.

Wonks Adventure October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

Palin’s talking about how tolerant and diverse she is. I think she even knows this one black guy from high school.

Delicious October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

She is rocking this debate. I don’t like her, but I have to give her credit.

Ken is playing to the peanut gallery.

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

God damn uncommitted Ohio voters don’t like the homosex very much at all.

HandsomePete October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

Hey, everyone hates the gays!

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

As soon as foreign policy was mentioned, everyone laughed

President Beeblebrox October 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm

LOL WUT

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

What?! Biden didn’t say that they didn’t support Gay Marriage.

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Well, I’m to the point that I’m hoping that Biden flashes his breast at the camera.

thwanger October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

and the iraq such as who dont have maps like such as south africa an iraq an such as

Street Organizer October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

OMG SHE IS AWFUL.

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Oh shit foreign policy its on now motherfucker.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

What a fucking liar.

WadISay October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Do I have to cross myself when someone says “General Petraeus”?

mirrorball October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

What about between a man and two women?

jagorev October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Andrew Sullivan has won, I think.

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

These words she is using; Drill baby drill, Pushed Hard…early withdrawal! Gulp.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Yes, sweetie, you DO need early withdrawl.

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Am I the only one yelling at my TV? This woman is going to make me crazy.

Strappo October 2, 2008 at 9:38 pm

intercontentinal shelf? it doesn’t exist!

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

Well, she hasn’t imploded yet, but I’m waiting for the swimsuit competition.

Keram2 October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

I hate this. I hate, hate, hate this.

Tobywankenobe October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

Just for the record, yea; i’d drill her offshore.

Mrs_T October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

God knows early withdrawal doesn’t work. Just ask Levi.

StripesAndPlaids October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

I swear she just said “we don’t want to pull out early.”

ProfessorJukes October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

“Pushed hard” by another great american – we don’t need early withdrawal – surge surge surge -DAMN!
She’s just going to get America horny enough to vote for her!!!

WadISay October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

Pretty evidently, Sarah’s not for early withdrawal.

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

SKS where are you in our hour of need?

splittter October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

thank god those two homophobes agree on something!

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

CLOSER TO VICTORY??? CLOSER???? closer like Shiites and Sunnis are getting closer to becoming friends!!!

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm

I wonder if she supported early withdrawl vis a vis Luke from Bristol…knowwhatahmsayin?

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

I disapprove of a time line. I prefer a lock box.

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

I thought we were fighting “Al Queda,” not Shia extremists.

Wait, she doesn’t know that those are different either?

toastandlove October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

[re=119872]HandsomePete[/re]: Yup, they agree on that: Gays don’t deserve to be married, but gosh darn they are just dandy people really.

mirrorball October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

Biden just nailed the Iraq question.

Queen Regine October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

Dear God,

I REALLY REALLY HATE HER.

Please forgive me.

QR

smirking fucking bitch

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm

[re=119887]WadISay[/re]: No, it counts as a shot or a double-beer swig.

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Little Girl Voice. Um, yer plan.

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Boy, she is just one over rehearsed douche.

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Kill me kill me kill me now.
WHY IS SHE STILL TALKING ABOUT THE SURGE?

schvitzatura October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Um…(longest pause, fumbling for sound bite)…WHITE FLAG! I winz!

StripesAndPlaids October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Nice job of remembering the sound bite, Sarah! White flag of surrender indeed!

stopsmiling October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

she just called Joe and Barry a couple of pussies

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Hey, he said on O’Reilly the surge works! He shouldn’t have but he did.

jagorev October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Iraq is still a winning issue. The bitterz are loving Biden’s response here, and hating Palin, in a way that they didn’t show during all the economy talk.

ReverendJeffy October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

I know that Palin says she doesn’t support early withdrawal from Iraq, but I wonder if she supports early withdrawal from her daughters. Come on, Ifill! Ask the important questions!

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:41 pm

oooh, she’s trying to goad Joe.

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

Victory in Eye-Rack! Yea she got a nice Rack….

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

She’s starting to smirk. He laughs indulgently. If only he’d say SHE isn’t ready to be commander in chief….

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

What what what? Palin is working with the Taliban?!?

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

“You said….”, “you said…”, “you said….”

Bitch, we’re ALL waiting to hear what YOU say.

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

In the primary, Joe Biden also called Obama a twinkle-toed chorine.

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

She just dissed the National Guard.

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

Can Biden stop answering every damn question by talking about a fucking senate vote????

thwanger October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

[re=119899]Mrs_T[/re]: super win!

Wonks Adventure October 2, 2008 at 9:42 pm

Ohioans oppose ending wars. They’re in the tank.

Also, those six seconds of silence from Palin after Biden finished talking were incredibly awkward.

Wagamuffin October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

[re=119868]Delicious[/re]: Win. I think we’ve been had about how bad she was supposed to be. As for debating style, she is doing what every other political debator does: turn it around to the message you want to deliver.

germanchriz October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

war.

well.

we’ve been always against it.

“our troops”?

pooh.

what would she be thinkin’ ’bout that GAWDdamned war if her son (what was his name? bagdad palin?) came back in a body bag?

oh, of course – she’d think that it was GAWD’s plan. only the good die young.

she’s dangerous…

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

Oh, Snap! “Let’s get straight….!”

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

She has been well-coached. A good weeks work.

McCain usually votes against the soldiers and veterans, but he loves his warz.

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

Joe didn’t take her bait, he’s sticking to the facts. Good on you, Joe.

choinski October 2, 2008 at 9:43 pm

Palin: Gwen, I’d like to buy a “G”…

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

Looks like the Ohio ladies are lovin’ on Joe!

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

Damn, I wish this question on Pakistan had gone to her first….

2druk2phluq October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

Unless she takes her top off, I proclaim this a mighty victory for Joe “The Human Shark Teeth” Biden

Yuppie October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

I wish Gwen Iffel would quit interrupting Sarah Palin’s speech with her stupid questions.

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

[re=119935]jagorev[/re]: the bitterz love Joe more than BHO. He may drag those Buckeye Bitterz over the line in November since he’s from Scranton and all (just like HRC).

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

I support a nuclear San Marino.

SloppyCronkite October 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm

All foreign policy questions should start with Palin.

Uncommon Nonsense October 2, 2008 at 9:45 pm

STOP PRONOUNCING IT “EYE-RACK,” DUMBFUCK

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:45 pm

nu cu ler

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:45 pm

Joe knows his foreign policy. Sarah can’t pronounce nuclear.

Buffalogal October 2, 2008 at 9:45 pm

She said Noooocul ar…..She is Georgia Bush

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

FUCK there it is again! FUCK and again! Why can’t people get that word right?

jagorev October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

OMG Biden just mentioned madrassas. I hope Palin uses this to make a shockingly racist comment about Obama.

SloppyCronkite October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Is a leader who uses “cunt” sane and stable?

schvitzatura October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

We should be bombing those madrassas training camps back to the Pre-Cambrian Era.

NuCKUUUULUUUUR…my ears!

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

The Castro brothers… are they related to the Marx brothers?

Queen Regine October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Dear God,

OK. I have really had it now. I BEYOND HATE HER.
I hate HATE hate her.

Time for serious redemption.
QR

I really do hate her, By the way.

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

General Petraeus. This generations Eisenhower. Or soemthing like that.

Nookuular. Disqualified!

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

The Castro Brothers!

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

AAAAAH! she keeps mispronouncing nuclear. But she can say Ahmadinejad. Bet she practiced.

gradgrind October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

New-clue-yer — that seals it; she’s every bit as kwallified as Dubya!

Godzilla October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

She said nucular 3 times in that 90 seconds or so. Four times in the debate.

badco/LoJ October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

So we’re going to bomb the fuck out of Iran, nucular-style.

Jesus I hate this woman.

PengIn October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Nuk-u-lar!!!!!!!!

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Come on, Joe! Bitch smack her already!!!

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

She’s not flaming out, but dammit she is not winning. She is fragmenting sentences and flogging lost causes. And Shrub supports civil nuclear power for Iran.

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Should she really talk about not allowing a leader who is “insane and not stable” to get nuclear weapons when she is running with John McCain?

Yuppie October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Sarah Palin literally cannot pronounce anything. “NOO KYOO LAR EYE RAN!”

PeteJayhawk v2.0 October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Background graphics gone…top stories gone?

Servers reaching critical…

Dare I say they’re about to go…nucular?

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Dr.Kissinger and had a great, um, talk, slurp.

Pawdedoo October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

I’d like to have been a fly on the wall for the Palin-Kissinger summit.

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Henry Kissinger shared with Palin his passion….for diplomacy. Is that what they call it?

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

As a PTA president, she’s landing a few good “middle America” shots. Not some elitist bs that would appear in the New Yawker. She is able to speechify without Gwen calling her on it though. She must be in the tank for chicks.

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

You don’t have respect for women’s rights either, cunt.

Neilist October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall during her “discussion” with Dr. K.

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

Oh yeah, Kissinger has a REAL passion for diplomacy. For unfettered imperialism.

Delicious October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

Biden is losing.

Schilde October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

oh I see you just nuke everyone on the ground for women’s lib is that correct miss palin

BitterPolitico October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

Would someone please tell Joe Biden that Madras means school in arabic? Come on people, let’s stop making redundant statements.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

Joe, go, smack her.

2druk2phluq October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

My drinking game has too many stuffs in it.

lightskinegro October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

I hate her….I really do.

badco/LoJ October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

SIT DOWN. TALK. TALK. TALK.

nice.

Delicious October 2, 2008 at 9:48 pm

game changer debate…though the economy may trump

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

So wait, you agree with the former Secretaries of state, but you don’t want to sit down an talk, Caribou Barbie? Blood is coming out of my ears…

Monsieur Grumpe October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

Castro brothers? Don’t they make cough drops?

loganmo October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

“Ill believe the leader of al-Qaeda”….oy vey….

justshocking October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

its devolving into a contest over who can pronounce ahmedijand (?) better.

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

It’s pretty clear that what we are doing isn’t working, I guess talking can’t hurt.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

Calling out SPAIN, yes!!!!

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

[re=119960]2druk2phluq[/re]: After 5 kids she still might not win.

wgrins October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

nucular. drink.

pinkdc October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

SpainnnnnnnA

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

High-ranking diplomat to Iran was Snowflake, the Montreal World Winter Games mascot.

Delicious October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

[re=119990]nurple[/re]: She is winning

ifthethunderdontgetya October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

George Bush in a skirt.
~

agentstinky October 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm

Biden could stand to shorten his answers a little bit, but he still looks like a freaking oratorical genius compared to fucking Palin.

Polly Sigh-Entist October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

JerseyGirl: yeah Ohio gals, luving on Joe (versus the volcano)

Neilist October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

Personally, I wouldn’t sit down with Spain, either.

Nasty little beaners.

stew October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

Oh fuck, Biden his schooling this bimbo.

WhiteRabbitt October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

second holocaust? where is that coming from?

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

I hate her! Can I get an AMEN!

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

Joe’s a smart man. He can talk about issues and she’s reading her talking points. Send Rapture Barbie back to Alaska so they can impeach her over Troopergate.

flhb October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

She digs those Jews baby!

wheelie October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

Oh I’m going to bed. It’s nearly 3 am over here.

Result: Palin more capable than supposed. Biden far more informed and persuasive.

But . . . unless Palin screws up before the end, the outcome is basically a Palin win, because her stock goes up upon proving that she can speak whole consecutive sentences. Biden’s stock remains the same.

Sorry!

Night all xx

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

[re=119806]chascates[/re]: Easy. Gwen kept asking questions that Palin had to answer. Requiring answers is a sign of liberal bias. Why do you think the Bush administration never provides answers?

Delicious October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

The cramming sessions served her well

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

Peace seeking nation. Wow. Gaaaazha…..

tsunami October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

[re=119986]badco/LoJ[/re]: you are not alone in your hatred.

meh October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

am i too drunk? did palin talk about ‘talibani allies’?

graceless October 2, 2008 at 9:50 pm

She blinks a lot.

schvitzatura October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

One side or the other there? I’m bring’em to ya! Bible Spice will bring us the first (and last) Apocalypse…

Buffalogal October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

Seek to Destroy…

AGGHHHH. I seek to destroy you at the polls

slowhansolo October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

Yes, America, the McCain-Palin ticket does not know who controls the security apparatus in Iran.

wgrins October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

ooh, joe biden in the 3rd person.

Monsieur Grumpe October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

When she writes do you think she uses periods?

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

mideast foreign policy – school her joe

splittter October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

you know what i love about the spain thing … no matter how many times it’s brought up, they never say “oh, come on, oh course we’ll speak with spain, that was just a slight misunderstanding” … they actually mean it!!! they won’t speak to spain!!!!!!!

lightskinegro October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

Joe six pack don;t care about Israel Sarah.

badco/LoJ October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

[re=119978]simetrias[/re]: Fuck Gaspar Gomez and fuck the fucking Castro Brothers – fuck ‘em all. I bury those cock-a-roaches.

tennessee Jed clampett October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

she’s officially ready to warm the bench for the Wasilla High debate team.

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

“That commitment to our friends in Israel is needed so that we can have The Rapture.”

Crab1 October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

Crab1 approves of of Joe Biden’s self referential third person speech.

expatinOz October 2, 2008 at 9:51 pm

English, motherfucker! Do you speak it?

What the hell is she saying? And nuclear! Learn to pronounce it!

mizruth October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

Sarah’s doodling. Don’t be fooled by all that feverish writing.

smashtheduck October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

they still hate us for our freedoms?

Tobywankenobe October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

Is it bad for me to vision Joe walking over and actually, literally, giving Sarah a little spanking? I mean, he’s doing it metaphorically, so what the heck? Joe; just go over and fulfill all these pubescent daydreams and give here just a little smack.

Scott-san October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

“The FACT OF THE MATTER is . . . this debate is too close for my well-being.

germanchriz October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

at leat she can pronounce “AKMADINEDSHAD” kinda free. she’s ready 2 b president!
he
“freedom”?

did she really abuse the word “freedom”?

OMFG!

do u f***ing know what “freedom” means? freedom is more that just choosing what church u go to…

man, this woman banned books, had herself protected from witches in sum church and believes that the war on irak is some GAWD’s plan. freedom is: to tell her that she’s just talking BS. explainig 2 her that there is no such thing as GAWD. that if BS would be a curreny she’d be able 2 bail out wall street on her own.

folks, are the books by kant and hegel already burned in public in alaska? they sure are…

Pawdedoo October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

Damnit, Joe, SMILE! You need to be nicer and funnier. You’re grumpy tonight, like a Dem McCain.

tsunami October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

see…CNN graph…people DO care about the jews.

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

[re=120013]Delicious[/re]: Don’t forget my Republican friend…two more presidential debates with the market tanking. Hmmm…wonder what the questions will be at the town hall? Jamakane will be checking his watch more than GHWB.

Dorje Drolo October 2, 2008 at 9:52 pm

Ilsa She Wolf of the Tundra loves Israel

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Does she even know where Israel is? How about Jews. Got alot of them in Alaska do they?

Buffalogal October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

[re=119979]Queen Regine[/re]: Back at you. I can no longer take it.

Bathroom Goblin October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Did Joe just hiss a stream of poisonous gas at her?

tacodeluxe October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

i wanna sex isreal up…all night

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Joe’s giving another foreign policy lecture. She thinks Bush Co has done well.

PeteJayhawk v2.0 October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Biden’s about to fucking explode.

Tequila Face October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

They both love Israel! Best friends forever!

Dr. Zoidberg October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

To be perfectly serious for a second, she really is as dumb as a bag of diapers, isn’t she? Her voice drones on and on, a perfectly flat monotone, and she repeats the programmed talking points and stares blindly at the camera and sweet zombie Jesus if she and WALNUTS! win in November I am revoking my American citizenship and moving to Great Britain.

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

And again, SHE DIDN’T ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!!!!

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Wow, all the love for the tribe has Palin in a Messianic mode.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

More campaign speech. God.

Sean O October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

WORD SALAD.

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

MAVERICK – drink hoes

graceless October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

NEW CLEAR!

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

[re=120057]FreshCliches[/re]: Yes, Israel must be destroyed. And Jews must convert (or ‘be made perfect’) or they will horribly die. God’s wonderful plan.

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Neoconservatives:

If “enough is enough” with backwards finger pointing, please remove William Jefferson Clinton from your sphincters.

slowhansolo October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

“Past is prologue, Gwen.”

And a million heads explode…

Schilde October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

This is bizarre Kissinger is now the road to diplomacy huh I see that’s interesting and she had a great talk with him that’s interesting I now know that I was wrong to believe that slaughtering everything that moves living and breathing “on the ground I want them” gone in other words in Cambodia Laos and Vietnam that makes perfect sense palin!!! I was soo wrong!

stopsmiling October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

finger pointing commie iran loving wimps

Yuppie October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Hahaha WHO ELSE noticed Biden take that frustrated deep breath when Palin said “we both love Israel”?! Haha he wants to rip her head off and put it on a stick.

WadISay October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

Ruffled feathers! Drink!

pat robertsons personal trainer October 2, 2008 at 9:53 pm

good to see the word “new-Kewl-ler” has remained the same from one dumdum to the next. oh yeah, they hate us for our freedoms and women’s rights. two things she’ll seek to eliminate. win-win.

Sonic Former Youth October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

change…is….comin. I can’t make it to 1030.

flhb October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Oh boy. She sounds like she’s running for president of her 8th grade classes. Maverick Maverick Maverick. OK Biden’s hitting a stride. Now he’s gonna say something stupid….

lightskinegro October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Golly gee America, I love me some Israel.

amobogio basketball-jones October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

screw the blame game, I’d rather play Hungry Hungry Hippos

wrenchdevil October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

I find Biden way hotter than Palin..and that’s coming from a blazing heterosexual guy..intelligence is sexy,..um whatever one calls that standing behind that other podium is not.

chascates October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

FINALLY! Tie McCain to BUsh! GO JOE!!

IvyJain October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

I have so much respect for Joe B!

She’s playing nasty and spitting out GOP attacks. It would be comical if this wasn’t a job interview for the 2nd MOST POWERFUL PERSON IN THE WORLD!!

It’s absolutely ridiculous for Sarah Palin to call Barack Obama naive!! She didn’t know 0.0000001% of the crap she’s spewing out now. Un-FREAKING-believable.

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Good. A nuk=lee=ar question for Palin.

Buffalogal October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Nuclear Nuclear Nuclear Dumb $%^&

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Joe: McCain and George Bush, sittin in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g

schvitzatura October 2, 2008 at 9:54 pm

Biden is on a sameasGeorgeBushes roll! ON A ROLL! It’s like a tent revival, hallelujah, can I get an amen?

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

“The past is prologue” Well said Joe. And way to hammer home the whole McCain-Bush link!

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

OK, Gwen is just goading her to say New-cue-ler now.

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Second time Biden has used the refrain “I haven’t heard anything yet,” as an attack. Smart idea. It is not directly against Palin, but it makes you think, hey, has she actually said anything substitave yet?

And the CNN bitters like it too. Win/Win.

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

The nuclear weaponry question is hilarious. I wonder how many more times she’ll repeat the term?

Rush October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

[re=120077]Dr. Zoidberg[/re]:

5 whore diamonds

Scott-san October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Yeah, give her MORE reasons to say “nu-cu-lar.” She’s just fucking with us now.

Dorje Drolo October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Staring at the CNN graph, trying to stay calm

WIDTAP October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

[re=120077]Dr. Zoidberg[/re]: But she does it with such bubbly enthusiasm!

Itsjustme October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

I’d like to give a shout out to afganistan if I could Gwen

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

We is goin to use them nuke-you-ler weapons…maybe like against Kim Jong Il and Ahmadenijad.

LuxMentis October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Another twit who can’t pronounce “nuclear”…new kew lar…twit, twit, twit…

Buffalogal October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

[re=120077]Dr. Zoidberg[/re]: Thank you Doctor. My wine just shot out of my nose. “Big bag o’ diapers”

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

More troops, there would be a difference.

cal October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

[re=120025]Delicious[/re]: John McCain, is that you?

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

She’s simply not smart enough to go on the offensive. It’s slogans. There are weak points but she’s not getting it done.

I disapprove of Kim Jong Il and Achmedinajad proliferating, but I don’t really think they’re anatomically able.

lightskinegro October 2, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Lets surge in Afghanistan too. YEE HAWW!!!!

mirrorball October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

She just blew the nuclear question.

Polly Sigh-Entist October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

I studied Nukular weapons, my dear, in Grad School. YOU know nothing about Nukular weapons.

graceless October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Schools for children!

EliteAfroChick October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

‘Facts matter Gwen’

Crab1 October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

oh sweet pedaphile Christ. Can I answer you question about nuclear holocaust by talking about a country that once ran out of wood?

J05H October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Hans Brix! ha ha ha! Hans Brix!

LuxMentis October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

“Facts matter”…shocking concept…

bhosp October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Facts matter, Gwen.

WikipediaBrown October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

“Nukular” is DRIVING ME CRAZY.

OzoneTom October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Yay for Bush-styke diplomacy — “the continuation of politics by other means.”

Barack and Joe needs to stop saying those things about Hamas and Hizbullah. They are making the ayrabs take over.

Nookuler. I can’t drink fast enough.

Good thing I “invested” in the cheap Barnetts stuff tonight.

Killing civilians? Wasn’t that what Jamakane was doing when he crashed his fifth plane?

He’s a hero.

bookish_lesbian October 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Second Holocaust? Second Holocaust? Do you know something I don’t know? SHOULD I BE FUCKING WORRIED ABOUT SOMETHING, PALIN?

Florida just exploded

Terry October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Loving Joe, but he annoys me when he refers to himself in the third person.

JerseyGirl Esq. October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Its a lie that we’re killing innocents in Afghanistan? Is this bitch really that dumb? Innocents always die in war. I mean, seriously, COME. ON.

23skidoo October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Yeah, more surges! Everywhere! Conscript everyone over 5!

smellyal8r October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

[re=120107]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Nice pick-up Lionel. And the “uncommitted” Ohio voters seem to be off the charts. Good enough for me.

nurple October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

The prolog at Stucky’s is delish.

Mr.BorgtoYou October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Yeah fightin them terrorists in Afghanistan. Especially them ones in wedding parties and such.

EliteAfroChick October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

the smirk is gone…can i say that again>? the smirk is gone

simetrias October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Joe’s gettin pissed, and a little pedantic with his junior high pal over there. But he just scored a huge point on Afghanistan.

wgrins October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

she’s in full on ramble mode now. sweeping nucular generalizations.

DID BIDEN JUST SAY NUCULAR?? ugh!

Oh, he just clearly said NUCLEAR.

FreshCliches October 2, 2008 at 9:57 pm

God DAMN, Joe is on a fucking roll!!!!

Texas2Step October 2, 2008 at 9:58 pm

Ooohh… Palin’s getting SPANKED!

EliteAfroChick October 2, 2008 at 9:58 pm

the smirk is gone…can i say that again? the smirk is gone

AngerBoy October 2, 2008 at 11:41 pm

Jesus Christ. Who broke the internet?

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 11:42 pm

Is “Bosniacs” correct?

grendel October 2, 2008 at 11:44 pm

How about a big cup of FAIL?

AnglRdr October 2, 2008 at 11:44 pm

Yay, wonkette’s back up!

Barack Like Me October 2, 2008 at 11:45 pm

[re=120145]AngerBoy[/re]: You can’t break the interwetnebs, it’s a truck nutz designed to withstand a nucular attack.

Oh, wait…

Keram2 October 2, 2008 at 11:45 pm

Yay, Wonkette’s back! You can’t bring down this Big $ale on TruckNutz!

Speed Ball October 2, 2008 at 11:45 pm

SHE SAID MCCAIN TAPPED HER.

By the way TEH WONKETTES HAS BEEN BROKEN FOR OVER AN HOUR WAH-TEH-EFF

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 11:45 pm

Attention all planets of the solar federation
Attention all planets of the solar federation
Attention all planets of the solar federation
We have assumed control.
We have assumed control.
We have assumed control.

canuckistani October 2, 2008 at 11:46 pm

at least when you were with Gawker, someone paid the internets company for you to keep the tubes flowing and not get backed up in horseshit

smashtheduck October 2, 2008 at 11:46 pm

Alright, who said it? Whatever “it” was that made “them” break my internets; bet you’re sorry now. I’ll bet it’s cause we noticed she just agreed she supports civil unions.

OffTheRecord October 2, 2008 at 11:46 pm

Oh thank god. Wonkette is back. It was cold and lonely here without you.

Lionel Hutz Esq. October 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm

So, who broke Daddy’s Wonkette?

voyetra8 October 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm

Bosniac is the preferred nomenclature.

jimh October 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm

Site was down, now it’s back.
Pundits are saying Palin won because she didn’t lose (implode). Mark Shields says this “stops the bleeding immediately” for WALNUTS! I just do not know what planet this is, puking ftw.

choinski October 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm

Hey! Youre back! Okay, Here’s the joke I waited TWO HOURS to tell… ahem….

Darn! My Mom’s Sarah Palin Debate Card looked like this, and she won in about nine minutes!

B I N G O

‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’
‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’
‘Also’ ‘Also’ FREESPACE ‘Also’ ‘Also’
‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’
‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’ ‘Also’

Johnny Zhivago October 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm

Hey did Palin say that McCain asked her to take on the role of looking after America’s mentally retarded???

Wouldn’t that put her in charge of the entire GOP?

Kinbote October 2, 2008 at 11:48 pm

Ken’s drinking under atree. With snakes!

El Bombastico October 2, 2008 at 11:48 pm

This is Ted Stevens’ revenge!

Speed Ball October 2, 2008 at 11:49 pm

[re=120152]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Good to see you. I haven’t been able to comment in work in months, because my employer blocked teh wonkettes. I think the PALINS blocked the intertubes with the oil pipelines. NO?

Weeping Jesus October 2, 2008 at 11:50 pm

Am I allowed to say this without being a Hopey Heretic: I really wouldn’t mind having Biden as president. I honestly believe in the man.

facehead October 2, 2008 at 11:51 pm

so did Wonkette just overload? Or did the Palin Haxorz bring it down?

smashtheduck October 2, 2008 at 11:52 pm

God it was all dark and scary and I was all alone….
Also… [re=120159]choinski[/re]: Did they warn her about likesuchas so she trained for the last month to change them to also also also also? Fucking irritating.

Speed Ball October 2, 2008 at 11:52 pm

Immediately after the debate SHE GRABBED RETARD BABY ON STAGE AND WALKED AROUND WITH RETARD BABY. They say the GOP plays chess when the Democratic party plays checkers…..

CHECKMATES

casinomike October 2, 2008 at 11:54 pm

[re=120154]smashtheduck[/re]: ‘nuke-u-leer’

smashtheduck October 2, 2008 at 11:58 pm

[re=120182]casinomike[/re]: It hurts. I have a headache in my ears.

Sussemilch October 2, 2008 at 11:59 pm

[re=119960]2druk2phluq[/re]: Joe Biden can go from ‘hey-great-to-see-you-smile’ to ‘I-will-tear-your-eyeballs-out-with-my-thumbs-glare’ in under a second.

off-white working class October 3, 2008 at 12:06 am

ummm…is it kinda weird that wonkette went offline right when tv commentators were forming their opinions on this debate? just sayin.

vickster October 3, 2008 at 12:10 am

Practice makes perfect. She must have dumped the kids with her first dude, practiced her tush off, and darn it, didn’t make a laughing stock out of herself. Shit what will we talk about tomorrow? P.S. I think she had a nose job, check out her little turned up nose as Miss Wasilla back in the day….

President Beeblebrox October 3, 2008 at 12:21 am

[re=120152]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Does that mean we Hopey supporters are going to commit suicide in an abandoned underground shaft after finding an ancient electric guitar and being shunned by the Priests of the Temples of Syrinx as we bring them our wondrous find?

Neil Peart, ftw.

President Beeblebrox October 3, 2008 at 12:25 am

[re=120231]vickster[/re]: We will laugh and talk about her bizarre diction, strange winks and facial gestures, and overall weirdness.

Oh, and her willingness to shitcan Article I of the Constitution to give the VP even more powers than Cheney has now.

Ilikepigeons October 3, 2008 at 12:41 am

I can’t take another month of this baked alaskan who speaks in mad libs and
that vile old angry pathetitic patronizing prick. My ears and eyes are bleeding
and I think I might die before this all ends. Please make it stop!!!!!

Kelys October 3, 2008 at 3:41 am

You all missed Palin’s little verbal slip.

9:33 – Palin speaks about Senator Obama and Senator OBIDEN.

New nickname for Joe? I like it!

Hot or not October 3, 2008 at 7:30 am

So,

I have learned two awesome new nicknames for the Killa From Wasilla tonight, Bible Spice, and Caribou Barbie.

To which I’d like to add, Winkie McGee.

tocute2btrue October 3, 2008 at 12:32 pm

My God even that damb Pig looks better than Michelle, better punanny to I would bet.

tocute2btrue October 3, 2008 at 12:41 pm

I ask Joe what the Hell?
Toward the end all that would come out of his mouth was Bushs,’Bushs’,Bushs’.
I had heard enough Bushs’ Well I have to forgive him, he said from the onset wnen he saw Palin he got a boner that a cat couldn’t scratch.
After that all he could think of was getting Palin in the Bushes,I guess it is over now all that damb money spent and Palin run off with the show.

Mr.BorgtoYou October 3, 2008 at 4:01 pm

Gee I was havin fun last nite until the wonkette got broke. I gave up on you before you came back. Sorry. But I got a real kick out o her saying John McCain Tapped her, yea Baby!

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