Wonkette
Oh look it’s Carey Torrice, County Commissioner in Macomb County, Michigan! Some e-mail we just got, completely unrelated, tells us that Macomb County is a bellwether for the state. Important! And Carey Torrice, who recently won TMZ’s search for America’s hottest politician, pretty much runs it. And yet, despite having a hot piece of ass as County Commissioner, Macomb residents are complaining about the TMZ article, which “has featured photos taken from Torrice’s own Web site that show her in various sexy costumes.” Well then! Let’s check out Torrice’s website shall we?
So she was in some movie at some point, and it kind of screams “straight-to-video” and probably no one has ever seen it because why? Right. This is kind of awesome though. “Look at me, Carey, with my legs brutally sawed off and pools of blood collecting!” HA HA HA WHEEE!
Ah well there’s a boob.
“Modeling gloves.” Is that what the kids call it these days?
LIEUTENANT DONOVAN!!! He’s so hot she probably does him a lot. Look at him cover his boner with his police helmet. Why even bother?
Re-elect Carey Torrice! She’s a star.
Angry residents jeer ‘Hot Politician’ Torrice at Macomb board meeting [Detroit News]
[CareyTorrice.com]
That’s cleavage I can believe in!
PULL PALIN NOW. NEW VEEP! NEW VEEP!
shortsshortsshorts:
Sorry, she’s a Demrat.
Are you guys cari, cari. . . .
“Mocking?”
Yeah, that’s it.
She has just been invited to my debate drinking-game party.
shortsshortsshorts: Yeah, but can you see Russia from Macomb County? Can you even see Canada?
Drill, baby, drill! Er, something like that.
All that, and she can see Canada from her house too.
our polls are rising…
Can we have her debate Obama instead of McCain?
Thats a set of tits we can ALL believe in !!
…please tell me she eats moose burgers!
shortsshortsshorts: Agreed. Why couldn’t Wonkette have picked up on this earlier so she could have been considered? Now we are stuck with Palin.
Nice. the only thing missing is the stripper pole.
Sexiest? No. Porniest? Yes.
Personally, I’ll take that Tymoshenko gal. You know, the Ukranian one with the braid-halo? She’s like an angel–a super hottt XXX angel.
Judging by wonkette’s record, she will be tapped for a major national position in about 8 weeks.
I grew up in Macomb County. Let me assure you she probably moved there especially to win elections. The Macomb County female, akin to the Macomb County male, is not attractive.
So much so I had to leave.
I still am not attractive but I am less easily repulsed by my fellow citizens. How they fell, who the hell cares….
CollegeStudent: You can probably see Detroit, which is a helluvawarzone. I think that counts for foreign policy experience.
ManchuCandidate: In what respect, Charlie?
Anorexic.
The CCILF!
RE: Third Picture
Raising the flag…
According to her web banner, she is not only Macomb County Commissioner, but she is also Macomb County Army Staff Sgt. HOTTIE and Officer BOOBIES.
Not tryin’ to harsh anyone’s gig, here, but kind of a buttaface, don’tcha think? And those hooters look fake.
Bimbette, the Macomb County Tramp
I see why Putin flys over her large county.
My county commissioner is an old fat bald guy. But he does have big tits.
My hometown. No way.
Wow, so she’s one of those desktop stripper girls from the adult websites?
I had no idea you could get elected in Michigan if you were also “an official hottie at the Hottiefest.” Shit like that probably flies in California, but in Michigan?
She’s like the whole group of idiots, D-list attention whores, porn stars and loser assholes that ran for Governor in the ‘03 California recall election, all rolled into one!
The one where she’s “modeling gloves to donate to the police department” SCARES me.
The best part of her website is the heading at the top right: “Actress - Private Eye.”
i wanna be arrested in her county… kin i be busted there? but i’ll never be so busted as she is… who cares she’s a demo, put ‘er on a ticket, any ticket… she’s got a gun, a hat, a badge, and her own shire reeve, an’ udder things… put her on jumpin jack mcnuggets ticket an’ take dat bible spice off, diss is spicier, we can all vote for her an’ den go melt down, iss happenin to me right now where’s my medz…
Oh Lord, here are the names of her cats: Marilyn Meow, Madelin Monroe (Maddie) and Miss Kitty Merlot.
She does kinda look like what would happen if Ann Coulter evolved into a human and had tons of plastic surgery paid for by a foreign businessman who demanded hooters and wasn’t so much worried about the face.
I wonder how many whore diamonds she has?
she kinda makes Paris Hilton look classy, no?
She’s a Demrat?
Then I say pull Biden, then let’s talk about the format for the VP debate.
PoliTacky:
Watchyou talking ’bout Politacky? She’s no Gary Coleman.
Oliver: Oh, come on now, back off… She’s Real! I’ve heard summering in Macomb County produces that rockin’ tan. Or maybe she got it at her disney destination wedding! Jealous!
edgydrifter: You make “porniest” sound like a negative.
Biggest town in the county is Warren, MI, where they stopped showing the city council meetings on local access cable because the regular shouting matches, threats of violence and shoving matches among the council members combined with hysterical screaming, fist fights and arrests in the audience were so embarrassing.
She gives new meaning to “polling the electorate…”
Catch Carey Torrice in her new Wicked Pictures feature, “Debaitin’”. Co starring Ron Jeremy and Long Dong Silver. There’s a budget crisis in Macomb County, and it’s up to Carrie to save the day with her special legislative ‘maneuvers’!!! But she only has 2 hours to ‘pull’ it off, or it’s back to the Jiggly Room.
NavinJohnson: A wet T-shirt contest would work.
Tommy Says Soooo: What! No fuckin’ Daisy Duke?
donner_froh:
Jerry Springer?
A certain sweater kitten in Florida just slashed her wrists.
ManchuCandidate: hmmm… maybe I was thinking of her when she’s on her knees!
Can you still buy rabbits for pets or meat in central Michigan? I haven’t had delicious bunny feet in way too long now.
Does she have any handicapped kids? Not national politics material then. Someone has got to tell her to get a different Halloween costume than different colored Barbara Boxer’s. No repeats. How about a sexy cat?
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
i know i know, i was sexiss a minnit ago, an’ i pologize, didn’t mean to offend if i did, but i’m red-blooded merkun… i like her gun…
donner_froh: They don’t call it a “battleground state” for nothing, you know.
mmmmmm strippers
Oliver:
How can you tell when the only true way to know is by the time-honored taste test? It’s amazing how little it matters that they are fake. My definition of fake tits are tits which I cannot touch. In that regard all tits are fake. I still love just about every one of them.
Yes, but what are her POVs on the issues?
ManchuCandidate: But unedited so really dull. Fat morons sitting around for an hour, a few of them scream for a couple of minutes, someone throws a punch, then back to the numbing mormality of cutting the budget to eliminate an office that helps returning Iraq war vets figure out VA paperwork and bureaucracy.
Time to go to the office bathroom for a little “Kev-O-Tron time.”
Oliver: Rock hard silicone (silly cones). Not that there is anything wrong with that (those).
One more crack in the glass ceiling… or I guess in her case, the mirrored ceiling.
Palin/Torrice 2012!!
Hot? check. Sexy? check. “Politician”? check. Well, that’s my entire checklist, she’s qualified to be VP. Sign her up!
She’s pretty hot for being 99 years old. http://www.myspace.com/careytorrice
The shot of her working out (http://www.careytorrice.com/gallery_category.php?cat_id=9#15) is full of win.
We are all moving to Michigan NOW!
Rodney Badger: Bonerific!
I just got sick to my pants.
Monkey: Bring vittles. It’s a ghost state, baby. You can have, like, Aretha Franklin’s mansion for $37. She’ll leave the chicken bones in the sofa for you.
freakishlystrong: Face down….
shortsshortsshorts: You go to the election with the VEEP you have, not the one you don’t have or the one you wish you had with the bigger TITS AND HOLY SHIT I WANNA MAKE POLICY WITH THIS HO!!! I’VE BEEN NAUGHTY PUT THE CUFFS ON MIRANDIZE ME ALL NIGHT LONG!!! I’LL BE HER SPECIAL VICTIM IF SHE’LL BE MY UNIT!!! THROW ME IN HER TANK AND LET ME LICK THE BOTTOMS OF IT!!! SHE WAS A STRIPPER FOR CRAP SAKE GIVE THIS WOMAN MORE POLITICAL POWER!!!
NavinJohnson: You mean VP wet T-Shirt contest…..which would be favorable to the Dems with Biden, too.
Noooooo!
Don’t you realize that this is exactly why we have Sarah Palin?!
You are worse than Dr. Frankenstein - you create monsters not to love them, but to mock them,
Its easy to see that this will be the most popular post of the day.
Wonkette, we have boobosity, so go ahead and take the afternoon off. You deserve it.
The Republicans may have glasses and hair helmets, but the Demrats has BOOBIES!
Hmm, which candidate would I rather have a beer with.
The blond with bigg titts, or the shrill harpy with the cool glasses?
I, for one, would have to vote for the Democrat.
Early and often.
“Loo tenant Donovan!”
“She’s got LAIGS!”
A trampoline at the debates = a landslide at the booths.
*boing-boing* giggle giggle *boing-boing* giggle
NavinJohnson: oh yeah, jello wrasslin’ !!!
Rodney Badger: Here’s the link to the actual picture, which you can download and fap to while you’re not watching WALNUTS yelling about how James Meredith shouldn’t have been admitted.
barf
facehead: But would she take my 3 a.m. phone call?
Our politics have now officially become exactly like Italy’s. And we have our Cicciolina. Hope everyone is enjoying the front row seat to the degeneration of an empire.
For sheer Freudian hysteria, it’s hard to beat Wonkette.
shortsshortsshorts: Those are called appointments, I think.
And yes, I think she does.
wonkette is hotter.
I got stopped by a lady cop
In my automobile
She said get out and spead your legs
And then she tried to cop a feel
That cop she was all dressed in blue
Was she pretty? Boy I’m tellin’ you
She stuck my butt with her big black stick
I said “what’s up?” now suck my dick
Like a ram getting ready to jam the lamb
She whimpered just a little when she felt my hand
On her crotch so very warm
I could feel her getting wet through her uniform
Proppin’ her up on the black and white
Unzipped and slipped “ooo that’s tight”
I swatted her like no swat team can
Turned a cherry pie right into jam
Sir Psycho, Sir Psycho, yeah!
ManchuCandidate: They’re usally hotter than Rethugs.
Damn, she looks like Kelly Ripa’s porn star sister.
I want to motorboat her.
Deepthroat: Yeah, have the gloves already been used?
Wonkette made Fridays Fun again! More governmint porn starz, plz.
RELATED:
Sarah Heath (Palin) SWIMSUIT COMPETITION VIDEO:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qQKdHxeMkk
lulz
johnbpt: I want to know more about this private eye business. Is it a Charles Townsend Agency sort of thing, where she and other hot girls get sent out undercover as strippers or whatever every week?
PoliTacky: Seriously, she looks like Mary Carey’s little sister. Smaller boobies, but way cuter and way less mileage.
Do you all remember the last time you boys went all fanboy on a lady pol? Something to do with “GILF”?
Thanks for that.
Please let’s learn from your mistakes.
Rusty Shackleford: I heard that Mary Carey puts out, but Palin is just a cock-tease!
I heard she also likes brain enema’s
AnglRdr: Very true.
Bleach blonde and boney does NOT equal hot. Give Olive Oil a bottle of peroxide and some silicone and America will put her on the cover of Maxim.
I wanna blingee that photo.
I want to insert my lengthy amendment into her enabling legislation.
next friday, can we get a profile and picture of some hot throbbing political cock action to drool over? Any nekid pictures of that San Francisco mayor dude?
I hope she’s available for out of town “endorsements.” She can finger through my briefs any time. I wonder if she takes issue with subpoenas. She can habeas my corpus. I want Carey Torrice to handle my litigation… hell, none of that is funny.
Uh. Hmm. Boobies?
Yeah, I’ve got nothin’.
“…a camera crew…was on hand…to get footage of her.” I’d settle for beaverage.
ha ha ha
http://www.careytorrice.com/gallery_category.php?cat_id=9#99
Chexk out the photo “Carey wins the crown”
She doesn’t even know she’s got her sash on backwards. She must have been looking in the mirror when she put it on. Walnuts should be all over that kind of signaling
ManchuCandidate: Beavage Cleavage
No! No! No!
Remember the last time you showcased a hot political lady on this site? She turned out to be a hugely incompetent power-hungry loon.