Wonkette
“The McCain campaign is resuming all activities and the senator will travel to the debate this afternoon. Following the debate, he will return to Washington to ensure that all voices and interests are represented in the final agreement, especially those of taxpayers and homeowners.” WHAT’S THE DEAL, WALNUTS!? [Politico]
That’s not a cheap political stunt you can believe in.
OMG. Hilarious point/counterpoint on The Onion over Palin’s experience. Reasoned “not experienced” piece. Counterpoint from Palin entitled: “Please Keep Your Voice Down, My Poor Retarded Child Is Sleeping”
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/87064
OH MCCAIN YOU MAVERICK, your stunt has stolen my heart <3
Wow, thanks for all the help, D-Bag. Now that this blatant voter-baiting has FUCKED THE ENTIRE ECONOMY, McNuggets will bravely not repair any of the damage he’s caused and join this debate.
I hope and pray that Barry throws him to the wolves for this tonight.
Please Hopey stomp his ass!
From now on, I’m going to just presume that anything Grampy says, he means the opposite. It’s just faster.
Kathleen Parker (n.b. she’s a republican with a vagina) at the NRO has given up on Palin (because of the interviews). Essentially she says everything we said about the interviews, but in a nicer way.
See:
http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=MDZiMDhjYTU1NmI5Y2MwZjg2MWNiMWMyYTUxZDkwNTE=
Quotes:
“If BS were currency, Palin could bail out Wall Street herself.”
“Palin’s recent interviews with Charles Gibson, Sean Hannity, and now Katie Couric have all revealed an attractive, earnest, confident candidate. Who Is Clearly Out Of Her League.
No one hates saying that more than I do. Like so many women, I’ve been pulling for Palin, wishing her the best, hoping she will perform brilliantly. I’ve also noticed that I watch her interviews with the held breath of an anxious parent, my finger poised over the mute button in case it gets too painful. Unfortunately, it often does. My cringe reflex is exhausted.”
his flip flops flop when they flip, like whoa.
I could barely read the whole statement by his weasel man. It is so transparently cynical and political.
Has anyone been reading the comic Candorville in the WaPo (or eleswhere)? It has been great all week–a theme about the military going out to look for John McCain’s lost honor. Here is one
http://candorville.com/2008/09/25/casualties/
A Republican Senator with nothing constructive to add to the bailout debate is….kinda like a community organizer, with less responsibilities.
Dammit, John! I want my economy fixed. You stay in Warshington until you singlehandedly get the job done! Now you and George Bush go bump heads for a bit in tough, but fair negotiations, and by the end of the day, save us all.
Just as long as not a single one of my tax dollars goes to funding some rich asshole’s golden parachute, mind you.
Under McCain’s picture in that Politico story, there is an ad saying “You have yellow teeth”.
The campaign is dead! Long live the campaign!
You mean that since his craven stunt blew up in his wrinkled face he is going to try and regain some ground by talking coherently on national television for ninety minutes? This should be fun!
The McCain campaign just announced that following the debate the Senator will be jumping the Snake River Canyon on a motorcycle. And because only he puts America First™ he’ll be wearing a red, white, and blue jumpsuit.
What an asshat. Seriously, I hope Barry just walks out on the stage and bitch slaps McCain with his STRONG PIMP HAND then dusts his shoulder off.
Well, at least my debate party at Marvin is still on. I still would’ve gone, but at least my drinking has purpose again.
Now, that’s hypocrisy we can believe in.
Palin is McCain’s secret plan for making us all regret not having voted for Hillary in the Primaries.
A moving target looks like it’s doing something and keeps the focus on him.
He’s out-Heroding Herod:
http://www.monologuearchive.com/s/shakespeare_003.html
hopefully now we can fix the economy and win in november
WALNUTS! you waffling sack of shit. You’ll get yours. Oh, you’ll get it…
wtf_files: That’s change I can believe in!
walnuts mcgee, you crazy old bastard.
Scarab: Now that’s a political stunt we can believe in!
…well he just wasted 2 days that he could have spent practicing with the formidable Michael Steele!
There is no way to spin this. McCain fucked up big time. We can only guess what his next “hail Mary” will be. Any ideas?
Everyone, Grandpa’s coming to Christmas dinner afterall!
No, Mom! Nooooooooo!
Thank god this whole financial trouble thing is over
Itsjustme: Uh, this is being held in Mississippi, Cracker Capital of Larry the Cable Guy Enterprises. I’ll settle for Hopey saying, “Forrest Gump was a ‘tard, but he was a ‘Bama ‘tard, which makes him smarter than all of you Sippis and Walnuts put together.”
That will seal the deal.
Well that plan crashed into a Vietnamese jungle…
stew: “It’s Mourning in America!”
stew: Cindy adopts a retarded teenager who is pregnant by immaculate conception with a baby that can solve the world economic crisis.
stew: Craven stunts are the stock-in-trade of spoiled, incompetent fighter pilots like Chimpy and Panamanian strongman Juan McCain. Reasoned analysis, thoughtful insights, and careful study — those are for wimps, guys who didn’t make the
football teamcheerleading squadstew: I think he will do the only thing he CAN do. On shaking hands tonight, Walnuts will use all the remaining strength in his arms and violent draw back Hopey’s hand, making it look like he just got conked out by a black USA American African.
Then the whiteys will vote in sympathy with him, and Cindy McCain will wear the happy glaze.
stew: My prediction: McCain will declare the media is too ‘in the box’ and halt all media access to himself and Palin, declaring the American people deserve better.
That and a goatee.
stew: I think McCain pulls a Red Dragon move at the debates, strips off his shirt to reveal extensive Vietnamese prison tattoos, pops in a new set of extra large choppers and demands that we all recognize him for the Becoming that he is.
$700 billion is just ants in the afterbirth.
Crazy McWalnut’s answer to tonight’s first debate question: “Yes, I’ll have the stuffed chicken breast with asparagus and potato fingerlings, please.”
Oh Oh! I know I know! Every question that he gets he’ll start by saying: “Back 40 years ago, I spent 5.5 years…” and we’ll all forget the question and we won’t be allowed to say anything about it because that’s, um, tortureist.
He’s the mutha flippin’
He’s the mutha floppin’
She’s the pill poppin’
Flipflopapotamus
stew: He’ll name Mary as his new VP since no one believed the Trig Palin was a result of a virgin birth thing
“Age of Delirium/Keep the White House White”
Sung to the tunes of “Age of Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In”
(with apologies to James Rado and Gerome Ragni, and to the Fifth Dimension)
When McCain moves into his seventh house
And Sarah Palin bags her final mouse,
Then war will guide our planet
And Rove will drive the car
This is the dawning of the Age of Delirium
Age of Delirium
Delirium
Delirium
Craziness and fear abounding
Hatred and misunderstanding
Only more denial and derision
Then the Rapture, as is written
In the Book of Revelations—
Israel’s true liberation—
Delirium
Delirium
[Funky bridge played by heavenly brass section]
Keep the White House
Keep the White House white
The White House white
(repeat till the instant before The Rapture commenceth)
Is this supposed to replace the 700B bailout or is it something different?
http://onthehillblog.blogspot.com/2008/09/reid-byrd-unveil-economic-recovery.html
Anybody read Kevin Drum this morning. The guys fucking pissed. I’ve been reading him for five years and this is the first time I’ve ever seen him use an F Bomb in a post.
http://www.motherjones.com/kevin-drum/2008/09/pass_the_bill_1.html
stew: Throws Palin under the bus by ripping open Troopergate and dumps her for Eva Mendes, who makes public appearances wearing nothing but banana leaves and clutching a bottle of Jack Daniels tells everyone that McCain is “the shit.”
wtf_files: what exactly is an “asshat” ? Do they come in blue?
So, on top of dissembler, flim-flammer, two-faced, double-talking, con artist, shill, card sharp, poser and hack, after backing down from this brinksmanship-like stunt, we can add “gutless chickenshit motherfucker” to the list of McCainian attributes.
Whatta pile a crap. Vote now. End this colossal waste of time.
once again it’s opposite land in tucker bound’s feeble brain, while the McCain camp tries to rise above politics by playing politics, while damning the rest of us for our political politicking.
I’m hereby suspending my campaign and going to Washington with a plan to fix this mess for considerably less than $700B.
There are plenty of walls already in place. We just need to pony up a few bucks to buy blindfolds and cigarettes for the CEOs.
The Neoskeptic: Would it be possible for you to enlarge your avatar by, oh say, 600% and disrobe the subjects? Thanks.
ihasasad: Looks like it’s meant to be in addition to the bailout. Sort of a mainstreet bailout to go with our Wall Street bailout. And DAMN that’s a lot of money, if both of those pass.
stew: Playing dead is a safe option.
But I thought he already won it?
“Be there, you bet I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a makeup girl putting on pancake, I’ll be there. Wherever reporters are hanging on my every word, I’ll be there. Wherever shutters are snapping and pixels are being exposed, I’ll be there.”
Sussemilch: Oh, shit. Even I’d be tempted by that. I can’t even leave my desk for a few minutes now….Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-yit. Um, Olympia Snowe. WHEW, worked again.
The Neoskeptic: Why is every young neocon nitwit named Tucker? Garmps has 2 and then there’s Tucker Carlson. Maybe because for their entire lives people said “What’s up Fucker?” or “Tucker is a Fucker” and they compensated by trying to destroy the world a la the weenie from Incredibles?
If Gramps wins after this bullshit stump, I’m taking to drinking for 5 and half years
No way! CNN just said that people are cutting back on their alcohol purchases both in stores and bars. Alcohol is just about all I buy, anymore.
Tonight McSaved-the-economy will say: “My friends, you think the last 8 years were bad, unlike my opponent I will make your lives seem like you’ve taken the strongest psychedelic drug while looking into a mammoth kaleidoscope. I have the experience and unwieldy temperament of a 4 year old running through Toys R Us. My fundamentals are strong and my campaign smells even stronger, like blue cheese cooked on an Arizona highway. Stand with me and my lobbyists as we take on reform of the lobbyists and the way they do my business in Washington. My opponent only offers speeches while I offer a steady diet of hollow stunts followed by my big yellow, toothy smiles.”
McLame: the bride at every wedding, the corpse at every funeral.
This election season is FUBAR. I say we all get into Doc Brown’s DeLorean and go back to 2007. Hillz Vs. 9ui11iani, the craptacular that never was. Or the craptacular that will be again?
madtowngooner: Bullshit stunt; rhymes with Cindy the cunt
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Drinking makes you lose your appetite! They’ll pry the gin and red wine from my cold dead hands.
madtowngooner: and Trig Palin the runt.
tunamelt: Personally I’d pair a good Chardonnay with my tunamelt. Also, judging from the speed with which you replied to my Facebook status I would say you love your job as much as me.
http://townhall.com/Columnists/AmandaCarpenter/2008/09/26/mccain_will_attend_debate
— The campaign said McCain “is optimistic that there has been significant progress toward a bipartisan agreement now that there is a framework for all parties to be represented in negotiations, including Representative Blunt as a designated negotiator for House Republicans.” —
***
Translation: McFacePouch no longer required to run out for lattes and Krispy Kremes for the House Republican Caucus. Track’s snowtramp mom has now assumed that role.
Kev-O-Tron: USC lost yesterday. I’m hungover. I love it enough to come here and sit and comment on Wonkette and Facebook. Showing up is 90% of success or something.
Outstando: Stop it! Stop it!
Any more of that and we’re invading New Zealand and paying for the war by confiscating all the sheep.
Now settle down.
yah, i’m so sher my 42 yr old broke homo ass will be repped by WALNUTS…the man can’t even be exposed to the sun fer chrissakes…
greatgooglymoogly: I forgot collaborator, mountebanke, philanderer, charlatan, impostor, quack, swindler, bounder, villian, worm, and cad.
MSNBC just said that McCain sat in the White House meeting “like a potted plant.” What an insult to potted plants.
chaste everywhere: sweeet, marilyn maccoo is soooooo hot!!!!
Before he heads to the debate, he will have restarted the Mid-East peace talks, stopped Putin from doing fly-overs over that powerful state, ya know, the Alaska, and started the bombing of Iran.
Jon in Austin: did they specify what kind of potted plant?
An Arizona cactus can be pretty cool sometimes,,, but a flatulent venus fly trap is a whole nother story….
I am just saying…
Never mind,
<< (kills self right before opening foreclosure notice from bank which will be bailed out by the bailout bill)
Kev-O-Tron: if you look closely, they’re actually naked. the flag is body paint.
Is he arriving in the General Lee? Yeeeee-Haaaaaw! I’ll even wear shoes t’see that!
Are we sure about this? Debate party back on?
“I am suspending the suspension of the campaign in order to suspend my previous suspension of the debate. I HAVE LOST MY FUCKING MIND.”
- Love Walnuts.
Looking forward to the liveblogginess. Here’s a suggestion for a drinking game: if he lifts his left hand higher than a keyboard, chug whatever is in your hand.
Har har, hardy har har!
Gee Golly Whiz we didn’t see this one coming McCain, you fucking lump.
How many flavors of Special Fail Sauce will McNuggets dip himself into tonight?
I think he’ll mainly stick with the OMGWTFBBQ!!!1!!!!1!
Okay, unlike even the previous election, this thing is making me feel like I’m losing my mind. Dick and George lied a lot, and relied on fear, and while I thought that *shouldn’t* work, I guess I can see why it would with dumb unattentive people. McCain and Palin are doing all that *and* completely insane, poorly-thought-out bullshit, all the time, and it’s absolutely flabbergasting. Is the whole strategy at this point to come up with the craziest thing they could possibly do, and then just do it?
He slapped enough duct tape on the fucker so that it’ll hold while he goes to talk with the celebrity. He’s going to get to mixing up the cement and plaster when he flies back. I’m just glad all his brilliant ads that never went off the air will be back on the air.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
Can’t we just chop him into bits, and parse him out to wherever his presence is required? Like holy relics in the Middle Ages.
I mean, it’s not like he’s alive or anything.
Um….this still isn’t multi-tasking, John. Good try, though.