What’s it take to make this guy, our moronic tool of a president, seem like an ever-so-slightly sympathetic figure? Well, there’s the hilarious global dancing he likes to do, and then there’s John McCain. McCain parachuted into town yesterday and RUINED THE COMPROMISE that was at least going to maybe try to save the economy before it completely collapsed. Let’s see what George Junior has to say, as the stock market opens and plunges.
6:31 AM — Well, what’s that distant light over the mountains? Oh, the sunrise! Let’s switch back to D.C. time so we don’t feel so, uh, tired.
9:31 AM — There, that’s better! Did you know someone named Santa Claus is on the ballot, in West Virginia, which is a Muslim state which worships Santa Claus and his “boytoy” Black Pieter? Well good, you can stop sending us that AP story now.
9:34 AM — Oh, let’s open our brokerage website, if it hasn’t been closed by the government already, so we can follow the stock ticker without that 15 minute delay. Oh, nice, the Dow opens with a quick 125-point drop.
9:39 AM — Come on out, Jorge!
9:40 AM — “The legislative process is sometimes … not pretty.” Ha ha, you don’t say!
9:41 AM — That’s IT? What?
9:42 AM — Ugh, CNN and what’s her name. Let’s go to Morning Joan and see what’s up.
9:42 AM — Still down 120, on the Dow Jones Industrial Index.
9:44 AM — Hmmm, JPMorgan just sold $10 billion shares at $40-something. MR. BLOOMBERG, STOP THAT NEWS TICKER so we can see, jesus. Okay, $40.50 a share.
9:45 AM — Dow’s down 150.
9:45 AM — We should just run a liveblog from now until at least November 5, don’t you think? Absolute non-stop craziness will reign at least until then … and then our new Alien/Chinese overlords will take away our internets, the end.
9:46 AM — NASDAQ down 40, S&P down 17.56.
9:50 AM — A “member of Congress” just told the CNBC reporter that a “significant number of Republican” votes are still needed to pass legislation. And McCain still hasn’t backed anything. Not the Shelby thing, not the Boehner thing, not the the Frank-Dodd-Paulson-White House compromise, nothing. It is a MAVERICK thing to do!
9:53 AM — Chuck Todd is on MSNBC, live, outside the Treasury (?) …. Sara should be here to cover this! Where is she, anyways?
9:54 AM — Your editor is going to turn off this fucking teevee and go back to his desk, in the kitchen.
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Even Palin could have delivered that speech.
I want to make a clever, snarky remark, but all I can come up with is: Jeebus. Fucking. Christ.
HAHAHAHAHA
All that build up for “We’ll get ‘er done!”
I’ve sunken below depression to the point where I just laugh at everything. It’s kinda nice.
Thanks W! You put all our minds at ease.
Last night I was painting in one room while listening to a TV that was on CNN in another room. I could swear I heard someone say Bush is a “high functioning moron.” I almost fell off the ladder.
Please, if anybody else heard this, tell me who said it? Thanks!
George: Boy, I just gave a great ten-minute performance!
Laura: Yeah, how come with me your performances only last five minutes!
wokka wokka wokka
He jumped out of that door like an elf.
Country First, My Ass.
“it isn’t pretty.” Is he pre-warning us that half of McCain’s head fell off?
PS. Truck Nutz.
I barely had time to engage the Bushism-to-English translator in my brain before he was done.
In a way, it was the most refreshing speech I’ve heard him make. By “most refreshing,” I mean, of course the “least likely to make me want to kick a puppy.”
So basically the speech was “LOL PASS SOMETHING PLZ KTHXBAI”?
WTF
Good god. We are truly and royally fucked if that’s what passes for leadership, at this point.
“Good morning, everyone. Everything is still screwed. Have a good day.”
He should open a school for leadership.
students: your assignment for the day is to write a 600 word commentary on why wall streeters are not a bunch of shits.
Christ. And Palin-America still thinks leaving idiots at the helm is a bright idea. If I hear one more thing about how refreshing it is to have “average” politicians, or “politicians who understand us” (code for “dumb-like-me”), I swear I will go postal.
[re=109325]accidental_tourist[/re]: “High functioning”? I think whoever said that is giving our court-appointed president a lot more credit than he’s due.
[re=109325]accidental_tourist[/re]: Paul Begala. He said, “I’m going to get myself in trouble here…”
Nobody blinked.
Ken how are truck nutz futures doing today?
GW, thanks for reminding me that you are still “in charge”.
I don’t know about you people, but I certainly feel reassured. This president guy really has things well in hand. Yep, everything’s gonna be all right now that George W. is on the case. Feelin’ good. I am going to run out and buy some expensive stuff on my credit card this afternoon, maybe buy a new car with my home equity loan. Things are looking up.
“There is no disagreement that something substantial should be done,” Bush said.
Wow, just think! He might soon be able to find his ass using only his two hands and a flashlight!
Any result with McWaddle standing up to anything is a fail for Demtards.
Ooo. CNN live stream is showing all the late night talkie footage about Grampy’s campaign suspension/bailing on Letterman. Damn, but Craig Ferguson is funny.
What would be great is if some andover prep schooled twat shoots Walnuts in the crotch for this.
Oh hi to my bitches in the NSA. Yor teh suckz.
[re=109346]JohnnyMeatworth[/re]: flashlight or fleshlight?
I can’t believe the only hope for this country is a bunch of jackass Repbulican representatives (the biggest jackasses in American politics, which says a lot) who are standing between the Democrats and Bush’s effort to give away 700 billion dollars, send the dollar plunging, enter new great depression. Well, anyway, go Repugs!
[re=109336]njdon[/re]: for additional credit; why should we save the grizzley bear and the banker?
having had experience with morgan stanley, i’ll be glad to buy the rope for the unruly mob to use. ha, ha, just kidding.
[re=109341]Walter Sobchak[/re]: they’re hanging low…
See, mentally I’ve already let go. I just assume I’ll be broke, living in a derelict
singlewide somewhere in tornado alley eating roadkill and tree bark. It’s kind of
a zen thing. Ommmm….we’re fucked.
9:53 AM — Chuck Todd is on MSNBC, live, outside the Treasury (?) …. Sara should be here to cover this! Where is she, anyways?
Does Sara have a thing for Chuck Todd? Not that I blame her. I get hot when he talks polling. Dirrrty.
Accidental Tourist: Paul Begala called him a high functioning moron on AC360.
Well, that was enlightening.
[re=109350]4tehlulz[/re]: in the Director’s Cut of “W.,” I’d say fleshlight. Or maybe Sarah Palin will show up with her moose calf birthing gloves to help him….
[re=109351]slavojzizek[/re]: The Democrats are trying to buy several Trillion $s in equity (some of it distressed) for $700 Billion.
Paulson and the Preznit were trying to give away $700 Billion like a cheerleader’s virginity.
[re=109358]Cbs37[/re]: High Functioning Moran [sic] indeed
sobering up gwb is a tough job.
more black coffee please.
if they only lowered the capital gains tax.
deal must be done by monday because of aipac holiday. its there xmas or something.
McNumbnuts is the biggest cocktease, temperamental schoolgirl who’s ever run for Preznit. Palin’s flirty flitty behavior is exactly like him. It seems apparent now he chose her because he wants to be just like her.
I am sure this has been said many times before, but I really don’t think it can be emphasized enough that WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! agh. Okay. I feel better getting that off my chest. I’m off to stock up on canned goods now. Bush’s Baked Beans are going to be like gold in our new flourishing economy.
Damn it. WHY am I watching Carl Cameron on FOX? Here’s today’s spin…only John McCain was able to save taxpayers from the bad, bad bill the Democrats were trying to force onto the public. The democrats wanted to give Paulson 700 billion, no strings attached. All this is a sign of how McCain gets things done and looks out for the taxpayers. The rest, just a bunch of greedy bastards who don’t CARE ABOUT YOU.
If the public buys this line of crap, that’s it…hockeymom, hockeydad and little hockey kids are moving to mexico where the whole gang will learn how to play soccer.
Adios, Cruel World!
[re=109361]grendel[/re]: Some of it distressed is the understatement of the year. You aren’t going to trick the US government into a national banking system. Just let them fail, keep my money out of it. Nationalize health care instead.
SKS has fled the country and is cooling her heels and otherwise enjoying the stable economy in Bolivia. We’ll miss ya, but we understand. Please come back if we manage to elect Hopey.
We need a “Greater” Depression before we can have a Greatest.
here is the ‘moran’ clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfCMHGrs7VU
Holy shit, RIM’s down 25 bucks in trading already! This is bad news for Blackberry inventor John McCain!
[re=109375]slavojzizek[/re]: See also: Sweden.
They waited too long and sank into a recession with 50% inflation.
They did finally figure out how to fix it, and it was using the same plan the Democrats are proposing.
Letting it crash isn’t a good option, just look at history.
USA! USA! USA! USA!
oh, and
DRILL BABY DRILL!
[re=109389]grendel[/re]: Sweden…aren’t they half-breed muslin commies? Their plan couldn’t possibly help us.
“We have nothing to afraid, but afraidedness itself.”
BURN BABY BURN! By hook (NOT abortion) or by crook (EITHER bush or WALNUTS)
Funny how he has been saying that the fundamentals of our economy are strong…until his super-rich friends were affected at least a full year later. One of the greatest fundamentals of an economy, as I remember, is expendable income. It makes no sense to measure economic health with corporations that use massive layoffs, tax evasion through legislation, and foreign labor to boost their market values; leaving the rest of us with less jobs, a greater tax burden, and extorted for basic necessities.
[re=109424]S.Luggo[/re]: And Bush is the Chief Afraiderer
He just needs to say “C’moooooooooooooooooooon” and then rub his thumb and forefingers together, making the money signal. I’m sure that’ll spring the congress to action. Or hold his breath.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
can we refer to the president as a hfm from now on please.
[re=109381]sezme[/re]: Was it the squirrels in the attic, or the ones in Washington that finally made her go expat?
[re=109358]Cbs37[/re]: “Paul Begala called him a high functioning moron on AC360.”
I know, I know! I saw it but I couldn’t believe it. He prefaced it with “I’m just gonna say this…”
This is so depressing.
http://www.entertonement.com/collections/4250/George-W-Bush-On-Bailout-Problems
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