Wonkette
See, we say things like “[McCain] could also maybe light the current bipartisan compromise on fire and order everyone to draft a new one,” as jokes. You know, “funnies.” You take reality and bend it, to make the humans laugh! HA HA HA, like that! But then the McCain campaign always takes our joke and INSTITUTES IT, AS POLICY. And that’s how John McCain has ruined whatever tenuous late-game compromise the adults had reached. And all he had to do was show up and open his trap.
House Republicans say that Senate leaders spoke too soon when they said a deal had been reached on a Wall Street bailout package.
In addition, a key Republican lawmaker stated that Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) wants to explore new ideas, like loaning money to financial institutions or insuring the companies, rather than buying their toxic debt.
[...]
He added that McCain is interested in using loans or insurance rather than having the government purchase the toxic debts of Wall Street institutions.
“We would prefer a loan or supplying insurance,” Bachus told reporters. “These are the ideas Sen. McCain tried to maximize. He feels strongly we have to design a program where taxpayers won’t lose.”
The best part is how Barney Frank continued to be on fire: “Asked about Bachus’s ideas, Frank questioned why Bachus hadn’t mentioned them in negotiations.”
These dumb poop Republicans are not agreeing to established compromises now so that it can appear as though John McCain has some hand in the final negotiation. Insead we wait, and we wait, and everyone goes to the White House except us. We wait. The thing that we do is wait.
No deal on bailout, says House GOP [The Hill]
This man is a fetid sore on our collective taint.
And Rothschild said nothing.
That photo of McSenile requires some strong blingee-fication. I can’t look at it otherwise without wanting to put my fist thru the sceen.
Of course this meltdown thing is going to look like a sideshow once we get that Gulf-of-Tonkin-y thing fully going on up on the Pakistan/Afghanistan border in the next couple of days.
Republicans ruin EVERYTHING
What the dems need to do is walk away and say McCain’s interference and “ideas” were a deal breaker; that his photo op ruined delicate negotiations and let the whole credit flow clog. When layoffs come and unemployment jumps ’cause of Walnuts! throwing poop on the party, we’ll see a jump in the polls, that’s for sure.
He’s Johnny McSeagull. Files in at the last minute and shits on everything.
Oh my gawd! McNutz has perfected the Kim Jong-Il method of scoring points: Do everything you can to true destabilize and nuke the world and if everyone else doesn’t act like respectful gentlemen to you, claim the problem to be their fault for disrespecting you.
The kid’s got moxy!!! We’ll call him ‘The Maverick’ and people will flock from miles around to watch him wrestle the country back from the brink!! It’s a sure winner!
Way to go, dipshit.
Man, he really doesn’t want to spend his Friday night with the black guy.
jinmoom: Yeah. Why can’t they make their own club?
ManchuCandidate: Win.
I hope the girlfriend is in a mood to let me drink tonight.
IT’S YOUR FAULT I DROPPED IT!
Another banner day in the history of bipartisanship*.
*Bipartisanship = abandoning your own convictions and doing whatever John McCain says.
Boy, he really doesn’t want to show up for that debate, does he?
Jesus, it’s like George Costanza is running for president.
This has got me too apoplectic to speak right now, so I’ll let Madeleine Kahn do my talking for me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PMGBucNONs
What a maverick! Putting his “I wanna be invooooooolved” whine before the needs of the country. 5 and a half years of your bullshit, Grampy! Five and a half years.
Aurelio: “I promise I will put Country First and do anything to prevent America from listening to Sarah Palin drool on herself again, October 2nd.” -John McCain
and then I read this horseshit… http://www.gallup.com/poll/110668/Gallup-Daily-Race-Back-Tie-46-Each.aspx
Wow. A CLUSTERFUCK. Who could have foretold this would happen when McCain got involved?
campaign? what campaign? I will be doing interviews on every network tonight but I suspended my campaign?
FTW!!!!!!
Well, so much for the urgency.
By the way, everyone in that chatroom, I hate you. That is all.
Yeah, if we loan them money, and they file chapter 11, we don’t lose at all. Dumb fuck. He and the Snowbilly were made for each other.
Short Bus Express comes whizzing into town, brimming with “new” ideas and blows up five days of round-the-clock negotiations by the grown-ups.
Look, assholes, none of us like this — especially those of us who aren’t bat shit crazy neocons. It leaves us gnashing our teeth at 3 a.m., but we decided not to drag you out on the Mall and pistol whip you for your brilliant dismantling of the entire fucking economy. Get over it and get on board with the slightly lesser of two complete evils.
Damnit. I hope there is a bloody mess of a fight at the Caps game tonight. Moments like these make me even more grateful for booze, country music, and brute sports.
Assholes.
Tomorrow Walnutz will miss the debate because…
because… he has to spend more time with the family. Yeah, thats it.
Cause there was no pie for him to stick his finger into in D.C.
S.Luggo: That picture is really pervy and gross. Maybe it’s because my hatred for McCain seems to increase 10 fold with each passing hour.
A former co-worker just pointed out that McCain is playing a campaign version of Calvinball.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calvin_and_Hobbes#Calvinball
Other kids’ games are all such a bore!
They’ve gotta have rules and they gotta keep score!
Calvinball is better by far!
It’s never the same! It’s always bizarre!
You don’t need a team or a referee!
You know that it’s great, ’cause it’s named after me!
”
—The Calvinball theme song
Wow. Just when I think this election cycle hits rock bottom, Walnuts whips out the shovel and digs to new depths.
obfuscator: Yes, whatever convictions he has or beliefs he clings to, John McCain will do the opposite.
WhatTheHeck: He’ll beg off the debate because he can’t find his car keys. He’s not sure, but he thinks he might have left back in Vietnam.
He does know they don’t have to listen to him, right?
Yeah, and keep in mind that Kim Jong Il is stroked out over in North Korea, and the military–who are FAR MORE CONSERVATIVE than he is–are now in control and have broken all the seals at their nuke plant. Yay! There are seriously no limit to the hijinks that can happen between now and election day.
S.Luggo: There you go. I was super bored at the moment.
and it was kind of therapeutic too…. http://blingee.com/blingee/get_code/71389954?image=284406437
When do the aliens blow up DC? Soon, please?
You think maybe this is all the result of his Manchurian Candidate programming getting all fuckled? I mean, about the only way he could screw his campaign up more is to request an earmark for that Alaskan bridge in the final compromise.
Dodd on CNN. I’ll paraphrase: WTF?
4tehlulz: he is digging to China to surrender in advance
Isn’t there a shelf of applesauce somewhere he could have knocked over instead? Where are this man’s handlers?
Tawmn: America loves a maverick.
Dave J.: Ironically, their missiles can probably only make it to Alaska. Where will we go when the Rapture comes?
Dientes: That would actually be a plan, which is something no one can accuse McCain of having.
Reminds me of the Teapot Dome escapade of the 1920s…with McCain as the Naval admiral who sailed his ship across an ocean of crude oil in order to capture enemy campaign contributions
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teapot_Dome_scandal
Now Barry HAS to call his bluff and hold a town hall/poetry slam/stand-up comedy festival on Friday night.
Umm…most insurance won’t take you on if you have a pre-existing condition. Insurance is based on the gamble that some people will pay their premiums but not have to collect. If you give insurance to companies you already know are f*cked isn’t that really just a bailout?
Please, McCain is going to fake a stroke if that is what it takes to prevent Palin from being asked questions.
Attention whore of the first order arrives and does his whoring. He said it yesterday, he was planning to take center stage during the bailout talks. Mission accomplished you old fuck up.
If John McCancel weren’t the scion of two generations of rear-ass admirals, I know what he’d be doing right now — he’d by that psycho firefighter who gets busted for burning down a house so he can “save” it. Of course he always gives it away by being the first one on the scene.
The thing is, more debt for the insolvent banks won’t help. That’s because they already have more debt than their assets are worth. That’s what the word “insolvent” means. Not solvent. So giving them more of what’s making them insolvent just makes them more insolvent.
Or offer a guaranty, say. Then, at some time, BECAUSE THE INSTITUTION IS INSOLVENT, it will require funding from the guarantor (that’s you but not me because I moved to Canada in 2004 ha ha ha!).
McCain is derailing this whole thing and not making any sense at all. The only thing that will bail out teh bankz is cash, like it or not. If you don’t want to supply cash, then you don’t want a bail out. It’s really that simple.
America’s most rotund, celebrity drug addict has it all figured out:
http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/home/daily/site_092508/content/01125109.guest.html
“Democrats Announce Compromise in Panic Move to Preempt McCain”
loans? insurance? jumpin jack mcnuggets, my man, have you not heard? nobody is making loans, and the insurance is all tapped out covering crap. but it can’t cover yours, captain. as for the american dollar, it’s rapidly becoming pretty butt-wipe.
McCain better hope the markets don’t go tits up because it’s going to be on his ass alone.
SayItWithWookies: Well, McCain has bombed more than his share of villages in order to save them. Washington being one of them.
Yesterday McCain says if there’s no deal, he won’t debate. Today Congress said there’s a deal. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that McCain would run in and fuck everything up because he’s scared of teh black man in Mississippi.
From Chris Dodd:
“I’m not quite sure what John McCain said at the meeting. He said something. … He had no indication he was for any particular plans. I don’t know where he is on all of this,” Dodd said.
So McCain is wasting everyone’s time. I bet the market tanks tomorrow.
NewAlgier: Only one kind of number McCain understands: poll numbers.
Only 30% of americans ‘like’ this bail out. He is hoping to get the other 70% to say, wow, that maverick agrees with me!
So, suspend his campaign while down by 9 points, check the polls on the bail out, pander to the people.
Fuck everybody else.
Agatha: oh how teh blingees heal my soul.
Oh, and if McCain didn’t know, there were companies that were indirectly insuring this crap debt. They were called Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. That he doesn’t know anything about the economy was predictably the most cogent thing he’ll ever say about this crisis.
why didn’t John McCain take the straight-bullshit express to DC 5 days ago to derail this thing when it started…
SayItWithWookies: See, Fannie and Freddie have money now. Crisis averted! Yay for Palin/McCain!
Doesn’t this ancient idiot know that loaning money to people that could never possibly pay it back is what started this fucking catastrophe? He is not ready to be president.
So McCain has put American First by rushing back to Washington to screw up a compromise that was already settled? So everyone has to go back to the table to humor the Republicans who are humoring an old man’s cynical determination to make it to the presidency in spite of America, by putting himself ahead of America’s best financial interest? If there is such a thing as a proud McCain family tradition of service I hope his dad and grandfather are rolling over in their graves and his aged momma beats him with her purse.
sati demise: When we are talking about $700 billion dollars to the people who put us in this mess, I don’t think anyone could be happy about it. And if it is a loan like McCain proposes we won’t get that money back anyway since we’ll have no choice but to forgive the debt to keep the economy moving.
Let’s see, Johnny-mac said now was a time for action and leadership and compromise. So he heads to DC with a plan, he told us all he had a plan, and somewhere along the way, his paln changed. Now he wants to explore loans and other ideas. So fucking much for compromise, action and leadership. Johnny-Mac brings us bait and switch. I guess that was his plan all along, bait and switch. Wonder if he will reveal that his selection of Palin was really a bait and switch and announce that Mitt is his choice…
4tehlulz: It’s like he hit the bottom of the barrel, and then lifted the bottom off of it, found a whole new barrel of uncharted depths of depravity underneath, and charged ahead double speed.
So basically the plan is that instead of throwing the winning touchdown pass to the guy who’s wide-open in the end zone, they’re calling a time out and letting the retarded waterboy in for a try.
NoWireHangers: Not only that, but they’re down 4 and letting him kick a field goal.
fuck all of you naysayers. Sarah Palin told me that McCain is a MAVERICK. Hence, he will maverickly maverick the economy into maverickness.
What an irresponsible cunt!
Advocatus_Diaboli: There is a certain maverick quality to an economy where nobody has a home, a job, or money. I mean, when was the last time that happened? Like never! MAVERICK!
From what Ambinder reports, it sounds as though he came back with some rambling proposals - many already rejected by the Democrats, the Republicans, the Administration, Sec Paulson. The deal may be good or bad, people are really uncertain. But he knows shit about what is going on. The market should be exciting in the morning.
qwerty42: hmmm. Ambinder had an update to the earlier (see TPM). He is suggesting that McCain was there to bring more Republicans on board. He concludes with:
“…After all, if not to get these recalcitrant Republicans on board, why did McCain go to Washington in the first place?”
qwerty42: oh well. at about 7:30 PM CNBC reported the Feds will seize WaMu and sell to JPMorgan. Deal will be announced at 9:15 pm ET. may you live in interesting times.
WANUTS!/Mooselini have got to win, for the sake of fiscal discipline and world piece.
If there were a God we’d have video of Reid caning this asshole by this time tomorrow. Do you hear me? God!
Crash McCain is pathological. He needs to have every mission go down in flames.
Pure cynical bastard. But as Rome is burning, our German overlords have seen the future of the United States, and it is not good.
http://workinginthedamnsaltmine.blogspot.com/2008/09/oh-crap.html
“Hi, George. So why don’t you command me and Barrack to come back to Washington, to deal with this financial crap? It’ll make me look Presidential as hell. Shit, might even make you look Presidential. And Barrack will have to come or we do that flag-pin routine again. He can’t just fiddle-fuck around all day with the bitters while I’m like all hunkered down in the foxhole with our Nazi banker receivers. And then — I can get all huffy and say ‘debate economics? Are you effin; kidding me? I’m doing economics, asshole!”
I hate to admit this, but I kind of just sort of felt a twinge of remorse for John McCain, what with his dismantling his entire presidential campaign piece-by-piece over the course of the past week - with the help of his trusty Snow Vixen, of course.
“These dumb poop Republicans are not agreeing to established compromises now so that it can appear as though John McCain has some hand in the final negotiation. Insead we wait, and we wait, and everyone goes to the White House except us. We wait. The thing that we do is wait.”
Beckett would be proud.