Wonkette
Here’s your blogging conventional wisdom update, which in this case sounds VERY LIKELY: Democrats will go out of their way to support a bailout bill by Friday, and then all of the Democrats will support it if it’s a somewhat good one — like the friendly Dodd proposal from yesterday — and then, just you watch, the Republicans will all decide to vote against it (knowing that it will pass anyway) so as to run a populist campaign against the Obama-Pelosi-Bush-Wall Street Socialism Bill of 2008. ELECTION OVER. We’d like to tell the Democrats to make good policy instead of good politics, but screw that, vote against whatever because who cares? Everyone just remember to stock up on canned goods.
HAHAHA That is a funny picture that equals fat cat.
It’s time for us to cling to our guns and religion… fuck, I’ve got neither.
…how in the hell can the Democrats vote for a bill that the Presidents OWN party wont support?! Can they possibly be that fukking brain damaged?
sorry for getting all wonky, but I gotta disagree…
1. Joe Public wants something to get done quickly on this. Inaction is not a popular choice.
2. Republicans can’t run convincingly on economic populism. At least not the current band of pervs.
3. Fear of political failure just breeds more of the same loser mentality the Dems have been stuck in.
/dick joke
do i sniff rove’s ugly butt behind this?
Different Scenario:
Democrats introduce bill with bi-partisan support limits the powers of the Fed to disburse the bailout $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ while placing it into their hands. Republicans have buttsecks (debate) and the bill eventually passes. Then the RED CURTAIN FALLS AND WE ARE ALL STALIN’S SEX SLAVES. The end.
How ’bout those Mets?
I doubt that this exact scenario is likely to play itself out. What is more likely, I think, is that the Repubes will filibuster a Dodd-ified bill and then blame the Democrats for not licking Bush’s taint. Meanwhile we all go broke and eat cat food while this continues. Finally the Dems will cave and pass the original Bush version of the bill, at which point the Repubes blame the Democrats for giving us a Socialist economy. Then the cat food runs out and we all eat our Republican overlords, the end.
I’m buying a gun
…this whole thing stinks to high hell, if “W” wants this bill passed he is going to need to get Republicans to put it over the top. Plain and simple, NO COMPROMISE.
I would remark about the size of the cat, but I like it here.
Note to Repubs. US America firmly points the fickle finger of blame on your collective deregulating asses by a little more than 2:1. At this point, playing chickenshit political gamesmanshit isn’t going to help one damned bit. Might as well do what you do when many of you Repubs hired Jeff Gannon to peg you. Close your eyes and think of Jeebus because you’re just gonna have to take it.
Here’s how it works: Democrats orchestrate a 1 to 1 vote on the bill. That is, one Democrat votes then one Republican votes, then a Democrat, then a Republican. And if it looks like Republicans are going to play shenanigans then the Dems throw in the towel, all vote “No” and Wall Street can choke on a fat cock.
If Dems let themselves get played the way Repubs seem to be itching to do, then they deserved to be banished from the pages of political history. Instead they should call the GOP’s bluff and see if those Republican low lifes are really ready to see the world plunged into a second great depression. Let’s recall that the last depression was followed by massive amounts of progressive reform and legislation, including the “Great Society” programs.
I wish the subprime bankers would do the honorable thing and throw themselves from their windows like they did back in the 20s - sans the golden parachute. Ah well. Pass the melamine milk, please.
How about this:
Everyone votes against this piece of shit.
Great Depression II means we all get to wear snappy hats and have jobs doing real shit like building roads and painting socialist murals.
After a few years of re-learning how to save money, downsize our lives, and make due with what we have, we end Great Depression II by invading Germany.
I don’t get it. Why do rich white people need welfare?
NewSpence: We get snappy hats? I’m in
NewSpence: I will only back your plan if I get to carry a hobo bindle.
Forget canned food, stock up on liquor and guns and eat your neighbors.
Sussemilch: I know right?
Ken posted that website last night for “buy my shitpile,” and it is beyond ironic that these rich bastards get bailed out for fucking up, but if my bank account overdrafts B of A charges 35 smack-a-roons. Reaganomics=Fail. No more of this trickle down bullshit. It’s the consumer’s money being eaten alive for fuck sake.
I KNOW not funny but still. Dammit.
Let it fail. Let the depression come. I have a feeling only then will the bitterz see the light. Hopefully we survive that long.
Serolf Divad: …or even easier, just tell “w” that we only have half the votes needed. If he wants the bail-out then he better come up with the other half plus WALNUTS!
Sussemilch: Because otherwise they’d have to work. Trust me, I know.
Sussemilch: That is change THEY can believe in.
This is the most obvious political move of the New American Century. I’m with NewSpence, let’s get GDII underway and get some fly murals out of it. If the Dems vote yes, we’re gonna see Republican Revolution II in 2010 and you KNOW you don’t want to sit through 6 more years of BS sexual predator investigations and impeachment attempts, etc.
As part of their strategy the McCain campaign got the 1st debate for this Friday limited to foreign policy/national security. Right, that’s what the public wants to hear the candidates talk about during an economic meltdown. The world may end before they get to the last debate on domestic policy in 3 weeks. McCain will probably cancel that debate, saying he’s too busy working with Bush/Cheney on invading Iran (or Illinois).
You mean the “do nothing” congress will do something like feed that cat and watch ‘xplode all over its face? Prescient (my favorite word of the election cycle), Mr Newell.
I’m selling all of the copper pipes in my home for case of beer (microbrew, please) and a plane ticket to Tanzania.
mr.november:
“depresscient”?
AngryBlakGuy:
Or even better: the Dems announce that not a single Democrat will cast a vote until Wallnuts does, and then follow accordingly. If he votes “No” then fuck it. Let the Banks fail, let the economy collapse, let the country grind to a halt and everyone lose their job. When the Market drops 8000 points in one day, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi hold a joint press conference announcing a follow up vote. Furthermore, they announce that not a single Democratic congressman or Senator will cast a vote until the entire GOP has cast their votes. “The GOP is determined to play games with this vote and leverage it for political advantage. Well, my fellow Americans, we will not stand for this shameless partisan bullshit. Let’s see if your Republican congressmen and Senators are willing to sacrifice you jobs, your homes, your life’s savings in hopes of securing their own political advantage.”
My canned goods are holding up my lean-to. I’m fucked.
I would like to think that the Democrats couldn’t possibly be that stupid.
But I’ve been proven wrong time and time again.
If they can just keep Paulson on tv saying “700 billion dollars” over and over again, there’s no way they can justify it, especially if Dodd keeps repeating “150 billion”. I mean, 700. BILLION. DOLLARS. that this man can disburse at his own discretion with no oversight at all, and no plan of action? That’s not just facism or socalism, that’s absurd. A blank goddamn check. Are you nuts?
Although I have to say, it’s been really interesting having a front-row seat to the fall of Rome…
The problem with this Republican gambit is that, at some point, someone in a town hall meeting is going to stand up and ask McCain “so what’s your plan for dealing with this shit?” and he’s going to hem and haw and “my friends” this and “blame Obama” that and generally come up with nothing.
The Iraq War proved that, in the eyes of the American people, a monumentally stupid plan is much better than no plan at all.
Serolf Divad:
As I wrote earlier. There is no political advantage either way. US America sez: Repubs suck at deregulation.
You just have to weigh the pluses and the minuses……
In a federal payoff of the bad investment banker fuck up……
1. Who Wins The Investment Banker crowd, mostly republicans
2. Who Loses The Rest Of Us, mostly democrats. Also republicans
that keep buying into the republican bullshit that
someday they will somehow be a member of that
winning group # 1 above. Short answer? N.F.W.
It’s almost like Bush was still the president, and rewarding incompetence on
a daily basis with medals to the scumbags and (if lucky) breadcrumbs to those
that survive the clusterfuck.
Does this mean I get to eat more Spaghettios???? Hooray!!!
Vote for the bill, Republicans run against it. Pass no bill, Republicans run on you failure to do so. Crafty republicans, always with your scheming and the America fucking. You rascals.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
After sending my two-year-old niece’s eggs a thank you note for bailing us out, I thought that it would be prudent for the Dems to use a good old Republican tactic on this mess.
Remember the Contract with America? Let’s create a Contract with the Middle Class today where we lay out five provisions that must be included or we walk. Period. We make goofy Constitutional-looking documents at Kinkos that reasonable Members of Congress can publicly sign and then email a petition around for regular folks to sign.
1. Punishment for the Wrongdoers (i.e. CEO compensation cannot be higher than the president’s and all bonuses must be retroactively adjusted for just how bad they really performed; they get no tax write-offs on any property, assets, or income they possessed as of last Friday; no golden parachutes of any kind, at all)
2. You Get What You Pay For (American taxpayers own a significant stake in every entity bailed out or assisted)
3. Separation of Powers (there will be no blanket immunity for any of those who are designing or implementing this bail out; the proposed massive shift of power to the executive is absolutely unacceptable
4. Give Me a Break (help for homeowners on the verge of foreclosure including a renegotiation of terms and possible forgiveness of a portion of the debt)
5. Face the Music (every member of the boards of directors, CEOs, and top management of each of these entities has to hold a public town hall meeting in every state in the nation to explain what they did, why they did it, and then have to answer questions for at least two hours in each location — and then they have to donate a percentage of their income to Habitat for Humanity or some other housing charity for the rest of their lives)
Anyone else find it ironic that the amount every single living person in the United States owes in this bailout is $2300, the legal maximum contribution to federal campaigns?
God damn, Newell, what this with linking to a 46 page Chris Dodd proposal in PDF? What the hell are we supposed to do, read it or some shit like that? Damn, who do you think we are????
Hey, Wonkette people! Check out this little chat thingy I made! It’s nifty!
http://wonkette.chatango.com
Maybe everyone should vote against it and let the bad debt work its way through the market. Then the parties can come up with long term solutions including a balanced budget. Increasing government borrowing just means that fewer dollars are chasing more debt and the credit crunch will continue, creating a need for more bailouts and a never-ending cycle.
NewSpence: do we also get to relive the exciting times of Prohibition and drive old cars?
InsidiousTuna: This better be awesome.
Also I’m trying really hard to make a good list of drinking game for the debates Friday if anyone has any ideas to contribute.
Every time John McCain says, “My friends…” take one drink.
Any reference to Maverick by either a pundit, moderator, or candidate drink twice.
Each reference to McCain’s years as a P.O.W. - salute the tv, then drink.
When McCain refers to himself as the candidate of change, drink half a beer.
Every time Obama says the word “Change” make someone else (who is drinking) take a drink
Each reference to Obama’s community organizing - organize a group waterfall in a Right to Left fashion.
Drink when either candidate starts their answer with “That’s a great question…”
yes, these are mostly not my ideas.
I decided to engage in a mega dose of masochism this morning and listened to the Senate Banking Committee hearings. Parts of it were fun, like everyone telling Paulson that he’ll have a no strings attached blank check when flying pigs ice skate in hell. Parts of it weren’t. Like all the wrangling about asset auctions and tiered payments.
If you go by what was actually said at the hearing, there is a surprising amount of agreement. They’ll manage to cobble something together that everyone can swallow by Friday. I seriously doubt the Republitards would dare vote against it. They’ve got angry constituents to keep happy, too.
Tawmn: I believe that picture saved my life. I was going make a career as an explorer of Waste Management trash disposal containers. But now I realize there is a more profitable venture which I can pursue. Think: the domestic kitty pelt, the new gold.
tunamelt: That’s absolutely lethal.
I can’t help thinking that these guys have managed to accomplish what no terrorist would have dreamed of: bankrupting the economy, getting thousands of people killed and maimed, and ruining the international reputation of the United States.
On careful examination I notice that the cat has no lipstick.
On either end.
Must you hate America so much?
Then run to your precious Canada.
Like they’re waiting for you with open arms.
Get a load of the whiny bitch of a “Republican Senate staffer” that Time managed to find today:
http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1843642,00.html?xid=rss-topstories
“Whaa! These chickenshits are betraying teh Reaganomics! Whaa!”
tunamelt: I’m supposed to drink at every moment when somebody speaks? This is gonna be bad…
Sussemilch: Thank you very much.
tunamelt: “reform”=1 shot
700 billion is an awfully round number. Sure it’s not 699.4 billion? And if it is, and you feel the need to round it up for a good sound bite, can I have the 0.6 billion leftover to buy the Los Angeles Lakers?
Remember how Dukie ended up on ‘The Wire’?
Uh huh.
InsidiousTuna: I am making a beautiful pdf with adorable America graphics such as walnuts, Barack asking where da white women at, and a crying eagle.
NewSpence:
Can we skip straight to the part about kicking Germany’s ass? I’m not a fan of that in-between stuff and, frankly, Germany’s been asking to get slapped in the mouth. Nothing concrete, just the general feeling that they’re being smug in their Mercedes and healthy economy and stuff. We’ll just cite the Bush Doctrine and send in the heavy bombers.
Add all the Dems’ amendments to this, S-Chip and a cutoff for Iraq war funding to pay for it and I am on board. We’re all North Koreans now.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: When was the last time the Repubs acted on the interest of their constituents?
shortsshortsshorts: I have nothing to do on Saturday morning, so I’m aimin’ high.
tunamelt: If Obama manages to work the Keating Five into it, I’ll gladly down an entire martini in salute.
bitchincamaro:
“Ready to lead”.
1 bong hit.
Sussemilch: This is a nod to teh Xtian Right.
700 Club. Mascara and prayers, plus lots of money, is all we need to solve this crisis.
An interesting article written by a former sub-prime mortgage officer:
http://open.salon.com/content.php?cid=21263
Nice idea invading Germany, but impractical. Still haven’t withdrawn from last time yet.
StrangelyBrown: Exactly.
Obama refused to vote against the bailout even if it isn’t changed to meet his demands.
To vote for Obama is a vote for buying all the shit paper owned by every major lender.
The Republican & Democrat stooges wrecked America.
The only legit choice is Nader. Wake the fuck up you assholes.
$70 trillion of derivatives.
What’s a $700 billion bailout going to do when the $70 trillion comes unglued?
Vote for Nader. Let the banks all crash. Stiff all of them. Pull all your cash out now.
I think you need any excuse to use this picture.
FAIL!
vigilante: Oh Bullshit vigiliante.
You do have some solid points, like the real bill is much higher.
But you do not have to lie about Obama to make them.
I pulled out of the market last year, but my bank is still good.
Let the hedge funds go down and crash.
America needs regulated banking and always has.
Phil Gramm and Johnny boy ARE the ones responsible- any vote for Nadir will help put them in office.
Then the real hell starts. You think Bush was bad? Wait until Mr. Nuke ‘em All and Mrs. Apocalypse Now get in power.
vigilante:
But I don’t want to wake up!
vigilante:
$70 TRILLION? Poor Nadlicker can’t count. It’s ONLY $45.5 TRILLION!!!
vigilante:
BTW, most of those were created during the Bush era (about 90%.) You know, the same guys who Nadir said there was no difference from the Demrats?
Where was Ralphie then? Why the hell didn’t he speak out about it then? I heard nothing from your dear Ralphie (actually no one spoke out about it.)
It’s too bad that Ralphie eagerly spread his ass cheeks for Republicon dough in 2004. Even when it was pointed out to him that he was being used for a false flag scheme to draw voters away from Lurch, Ralphie didn’t give a shit.
fuzznuts: I always call Gamestop Libertarians and similar low-class Young Republicans “Captains of Industry” but they never seem to understand the insult.
Maus: For repubs, I like “Masters of the Uterus”.
bitchincamaro: more like “Masters of Uranus”?
magic titty: Good point. Although, if it’s an election year for that particular guy, he might be just scared enough.
bago: awesome awesome awesome
grendel: the ones you have to watch out for ar those wose guns ARE their religion…
Let’s see, I got canned peaches, tuna, and Bush’s baked beans.