FUNNY PICTURES  1:54 pm September 23, 2008

‘Here’s Your Damn Child, America’

by Jim Newell

Check out Walnuts and his old friend Arlen Specter campaigning in the Pennsylvania town of “Media” yesterday. The “old hands” don’t seem to enjoy schlepping this broad around very much, but whatcha gonna do? McCain rally strategy: come on stage with some other local old Senator dude, then roll out that brat in the leather jacket and have her say the words “hockey mom” and do a flip into a pool of 40-degree water, naked. [Philadelphia Will Do]

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Doglessliberal September 23, 2008 at 1:58 pm

yo, I grew up in Media. It is the County seat of Delaware County and was totally Mayberry when I lived there. Philly suburb, but still a cute town, not suburby. It was also the District of Curt Weldon, Mr. Arsehole Republican Congressman for years. Big Repub stronghold area.

ManchuCandidate September 23, 2008 at 1:59 pm

Looks like a poster for:
Two Men and a SnowBunny

NewSpence September 23, 2008 at 2:01 pm

I can haz revolutuns pleaze?

Serolf Divad September 23, 2008 at 2:01 pm

Michael Jackson called in from 1982… he wants his red jacket back.

Delicious September 23, 2008 at 2:01 pm

Walnuts and Jowelnuts and Just Plain Nuts!

Terry September 23, 2008 at 2:02 pm

Arlen’s getting his hair back.

StrangelyBrown September 23, 2008 at 2:03 pm

I like the subtle use of the adjective “near-dead” in the caption. It describes so much that’s in this photo.

sezme September 23, 2008 at 2:04 pm

[re=104787]Serolf Divad[/re]: But the kid is not her son.

Servo September 23, 2008 at 2:05 pm

You can just FEEL their excitement! Kookey Moose is cheering “Yay ME!”.

Kabanx September 23, 2008 at 2:06 pm

That is either pleather, and she got it at Wal-Mart, or it’s what moose skin looks like.

blader September 23, 2008 at 2:06 pm

what is with the red jackets already?! seriously

ManchuCandidate September 23, 2008 at 2:07 pm

[re=104787]Serolf Divad[/re]:
Isn’t Sarah the look that Michael was gunning for anyway with all that plastic surgery?

ManchuCandidate September 23, 2008 at 2:08 pm

What about an 8 Ball Jacket?

More Klassy.

Q2 September 23, 2008 at 2:09 pm

McCain has turned into an issue whore. Stick your thumb up to see which way the wind is blowing to see which position this liar holds.

B' September 23, 2008 at 2:11 pm

If I hear “Palin” and “naked” in the same sentence one more time, I’ll have lost last three pounds…

magic titty September 23, 2008 at 2:14 pm

Specter looks like he can’t stand either one of those witless phonies.
Where’s a magic bullet when you need one, eh Arlen?

Diadhuit September 23, 2008 at 2:15 pm

ha! I read the caption as “John McCain, who campaigned Monday in Media, is a near-dead…” and I was shocked by the honesty, but when i realized the rest of the sentence made no sense, i re-read it (to my disappointment)

Komando September 23, 2008 at 2:18 pm

I know Arlen, and I can tell you a few things about this picture just from one glance. (1) He is farting, right at that very moment. This amuses him to no end. (2) That is the only reason Arlen is smiling (sort of), because he hates Palin and everything she represents, and this is his form of silent (but deadly) protest. (3) McCain, who has worked with him for years, has smelled Arlen’s fart and recognized it as his. McCain is not as amused. (4) Palin smells it, but thinks she stepped in moose entrails or something and isn’t getting the message. She is, however, being certain to breathe through her mouth.

Vanity Smurf September 23, 2008 at 2:22 pm

Arlen looks like he’s ready for Tweety to take his seat. Such enthusiasm for his role in the minority.

irisheyes September 23, 2008 at 2:28 pm

[re=104781]Doglessliberal[/re]: Hey- I lived in Brookhaven for 8 years and still have friends in the Wallingford area. I heard it was getting more Democratic as the old guard died. Not true?

AngryBlakGuy September 23, 2008 at 2:29 pm

…I’m not sure if she makes him look older or he makes her look younger?

Borat September 23, 2008 at 2:30 pm

Well I have to say, Moosilini doesn’t look near-dead here. Good for her! Way to stay un-half dead!

But america wants to know which of Walnuts 13 car gas tanks the other half-dead guy is in, or soon will be. I think the Caprice Classic.

Servo September 23, 2008 at 2:31 pm

[re=104823]Komando[/re]: WIN!

hockeymom September 23, 2008 at 2:35 pm

[re=104794]Kabanx[/re]: I believe that she’s wearing “Fine Corinthian Leather”.

Or a little something she picked up at Forever 21.

SwanSwanH September 23, 2008 at 2:42 pm

[re=104799]ManchuCandidate[/re]: You got a question, you ask the 8-Ball, Charlie.

obfuscator September 23, 2008 at 2:45 pm

At some point, she actually made a conscious decision to wear a pleather jacket the color of tomato soup. Good on her.

btwbfdimho September 23, 2008 at 2:46 pm

Specter actually looks handcuffed (finally).

Servo September 23, 2008 at 2:51 pm

Actually, that’s Maoist Red.

obfuscator September 23, 2008 at 3:01 pm

[re=104885]Servo[/re]: That ensemble isn’t complete without a matching Little Red Purse.

I also thought it was pretty tasteless of her to raise both her arms above her waist while standing right next to John “Lieutenant Dan” McCain. Have some consideration, lady.

Servo September 23, 2008 at 3:06 pm

Best in Breed, Best in Show, and the consolation prize winner.

PoliticalGraffiti September 23, 2008 at 3:09 pm

[re=104781]Doglessliberal[/re]: I grew up in Drexel Hill. good bars in media, though.

queeraselvis v 2.0 September 23, 2008 at 3:09 pm

[re=104902]obfuscator[/re]: Yes, but notice that her arms aren’t way up. Sure sign that her deodorant has gone south. This would also explain McCain’s pained expression… that, or he’s shat his pants.

Which reminds me: it’s thought bubble time!

McCain: “Dammit, Sarah. After this is over, I’m dropping you at the CVS for a carton of Sure Clinical Strength.”

Arlen: “Heh heh. Sarah has perky boobies.”

Sarah: “I like pie!”

Miller September 23, 2008 at 3:13 pm

That caption is all wrong. It should read “McCain, who is near dead, campaigned…”

Botswana Meat Commission FC September 23, 2008 at 3:13 pm

Let me guess. Strath Haven H.S.?

Texan Bulldoggette September 23, 2008 at 3:15 pm

[re=104823]Komando[/re]: I bet she always breathes through her mouth. She probably also moves her lips & points at the words when she reads. And, yeah, I imagine Arlen (who isn’t the worst Republican in the Senate) is probably thinking “I’m too old for this shit.”

wildeoats September 23, 2008 at 3:23 pm

Gimme an “M”! Gimme an “E”! Gimme a “T”! Gimme an “H”!
What’s that spell? Media!!!
Oh wait.

Cape Clod September 23, 2008 at 3:35 pm

I think she’s pretending to hold Trig up by his arms.

bigpfeifinphilly September 23, 2008 at 3:39 pm

Im from West Chester, 10 min down the road, and it is turning blue. Also the remaining repubs are the old guy Howard Cunningham types rather than rapture waiting nutjobs.

tonashideska September 23, 2008 at 3:40 pm

Arlen to mcccccain: Who is this SHIKSA?

Baconcat September 23, 2008 at 3:41 pm

Fold your hands child, you look like a peasant.

Doglessliberal September 23, 2008 at 3:51 pm

Botswana Meat Commission FC: actually, Penncrest. StrathHaven was for Swarthmore kids. I went to Swarthmore College, though.

tepid sunshine September 23, 2008 at 3:53 pm

[re=104781]Doglessliberal[/re]: I’m from Media too!!!! I campaigned for Joe Sestak, who defeated Weldon (D-7 pride). What high school did you go to?

Doglessliberal September 23, 2008 at 3:53 pm

[re=104985]Doglessliberal[/re]: and no, for the people who will ask, that is not the all-women’s college, Skidmore.

Doglessliberal September 23, 2008 at 3:54 pm

[re=104988]tepid sunshine[/re]: Penncrest, c/o ’89.

tepid sunshine September 23, 2008 at 3:57 pm

[re=104991]Doglessliberal[/re]: I’m glad to hear someone else on Wonkette is repping “Everybody’s Hometown.” I’m Penncrest ’07 (just a baby, I know). Was Mr. Ludwig around when you were there?

PoliticalGraffiti September 23, 2008 at 3:58 pm

[re=104985]Doglessliberal[/re]: I went to Swarthmore College too! are you my twin?

Deepthroat September 23, 2008 at 4:01 pm

Haaaaaaayyyy! PA in tha haaaauss! whatwhat!

Doglessliberal September 23, 2008 at 4:10 pm

[re=104994]tepid sunshine[/re]: oh my god, yes! I cannot believe he is still there.

[re=104998]PoliticalGraffiti[/re]: whoa, small world. And I don’t know, are you a woman with dark blonde hair?

Cranky Little Camperette September 23, 2008 at 4:12 pm

[re=104959]bigpfeifinphilly[/re]: Did an arts internship in Media a ton of years ago and remember thinking it was getting bluer.

Not New Hope blue, but bluer.

dmac September 23, 2008 at 5:01 pm

On the whole, the Philly suburbs are getting bluer: Old guard dying off, fewer hardcore Catholics, Bush’s eight years of brilliance, people leaving a hardcore Democratic city (where Kerry got something unreal like 87 percent of the vote in ’04). All of this is off the top of my head so I’m probably wrong.

Sorry, can’t really join the party: I grew up in Philly but went to a HS in Bucks County. The other suburbs remain for the most part a mystery to me, though I hate Upper Darby just because.

dmac September 23, 2008 at 5:01 pm

(Those of us from the Far Northeast are a little slow, apparently, not realizing we’re posting an hour after the discussion kinda ended.)

rbloom September 23, 2008 at 6:28 pm

I’m not sure the phrase “near-dead heat” is entirely within the bounds of taste here.

Mr. Herpes September 23, 2008 at 7:51 pm

This photo op missed the mark. Steve Schmidt told Specter to show up with an oxygen hose in his nose so that McCain would look younger and more vigorous. Specter’s look tells it all — I’m not dead yet, so live with it. And Sarah just realized she can almost see the Liberty Bell from where she’s standing. In a strictly rhetorical way, of course.

cynbot September 24, 2008 at 9:50 am

I’m late to this game … did everyone else go to Swarthmore, too?

S.Luggo September 24, 2008 at 9:59 pm

Kill the pig. Cut her throat. Spill her blood.

S.Luggo September 24, 2008 at 10:50 pm

[re=107260]S.Luggo[/re]: For the roadkill-dining, meth-toking, Bristol-exploring Wasilleans who failed to make it past 8th grade (which I assume also includes most Alaskans], that’s called either (a) a Merlot-sipping, elitist literary reference (no, MD 20/20 is not a merlot; it is an –mmmm-so good —fortified hobo wine) or (b) a Ted Steven’s off-hand comment about Joan Claybrook [no,
liberal arts assholes, she is NOT the actress who starred in "An Unmarried Woman".]

robanybody October 30, 2008 at 3:47 pm

The boys are wearing those angsty mugs because Sarah is saying, “In Alaska we distribute oil profits to everybody, no matter if they work, sit around in their underwear, stick oars in beluga blowholes for fun, whatever. We give em money, you betcha, for nuthin. And if that isn’t… uh…. ca-pital…ism? Uh, no, I meant, the oil companies make the profits, but we take some and distribute it, like nationalizing that industry except just a little, because… uh… it’s… capital… wait, wait, I know this one, I practiced this one…”

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