We have seen this service before, this thingy that counts how many times a person said this word or that word, and it is interesting how John McCain says “love” more than Barack Obama, and Obama says “war” more than McCain. But the real story, as tipster Whitney notes, is that neither of them have ever let the words “truck nutz” escape their lips. They are running for president of America, you know! [Speech Wars]

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  • Serolf Divad

    Bah, this service is complete bullshit. I type in the word “cunt” and it turns up zero, when we all know that’s McCain’s nickname for Cindy.

  • Special Agent Jack Mehoff

    Okay, if Ron Paul said it, I’m on board.

  • Terry

    Obama has said Bush 228 times and McCain has said it 52 times. John, why aren’t you embracing your party’s incumbent?

  • Special Agent Jack Mehoff

    Was McCain dumb enough to say “mid-cap stock”? I hope not, that’ll destroy a campaign!

  • InKnockYouUs

    What exactly are truck nutz anyway?

  • cal

    Why does (McCain/Obama) hate America?

  • Delicious

    I tried “Dirty” and “Sanchez”
    McCain has said neither
    Obama has said “Dirty” 12 times but never Sanchez

  • Hunter Gathers

    Dear lord, please bring us a candidate who will address our debilitating TRUCK NUTZ shortage. I’m afraid that our children will never know the joy of playing with said TRUCK NUTZ. Or writing about them in sarcastic blogs.

  • facehead

    Now I have no clue who to vote for.. thx wonkette….

  • btwbfdimho

    Actually McCain said Track Nutz, referring to the new war hero.

  • facehead
  • Canmon (the Inadequate)

    Obama did say “nuts” twice.

  • ProgHead777

    I’m addicted.

    Jesus: McCain zero; Obama 8

    Why does John McCain hate Jeebus??

  • Borat

    You have it all wrong. We shouldn’t be looking at the elitest presidential candidates to say TruckNutz. We have to be looking to our working-class-salt-of-the-earth Veep picks to be saying TruckNutz. Or Nadir – I heard he wrote a book about cars once, so it must be his thing.

  • accidental_tourist

    and jesse jackson said he wanted to cut obama’s nutz off.

  • Strictly for the Tardcore

    Ah, fuck. I can see WcCain not knowing about Truck Nutz, seeing as he no longer has any after FIVE AND A HALF YEARS in Victor Charlie’s basement, but Barry!? I thought he was young, and hip, and understood the issues that are important to US, as AMERICANS.

    Well, I guess I’m voting for Nader. Or vigilante.

  • accidental_tourist


    Iraq: McCain 520; Obama 579.

    I wouldn’t have thought that.

  • Yaybuls

    Looks like Obama says “pale” and “in” alot.

  • grendel

    Here’s a better graph, from Obama’s convention acceptance speech:

  • accidental_tourist

    I can’t get it to accept POW or P.O.W. or prisoner of war. Maybe it’s off the charts for McCain and Obama has never said it?

  • grendel

    I saw my first pair of wild truck nutz just last night… Someone was coming back to Rochester from the Buffalo game in a pickup truck with a Bills’ flag mounted in the bed and a big pair of blue truck nutz swinging on the back… Kind of disturbing, really.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …John McCain has said “Wide” 5 times & “Stance” 0 times and Barack Obama has said “Wide” 10 times and “Stance” 2 times! So the obvious question is: How many times has Barack Obama had anonymous bathroom sex?!

  • Strictly for the Tardcore

    [re=103067]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Based on this information, I’m gonna say twice.

  • facehead

    [re=103067]AngryBlakGuy[/re], [re=103075]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]:

    An oldy but a goody:

  • TGY

    Not surprising that Barry would avoid ‘nutz’ as Jessie Jackson has probably removed his already as promised.

  • Monkey

    Actually, Obama said “nuts” twice! So apparently, this was an error in transcription, and no fault of St. Hopey. Obama loves Truck Nutz, McCain is a hater! Go B!

  • Rush

    A count of the term “evil doer” was attempted but the machine broke – same for nu-cul-er

    In what respect, Charlie…….

  • springfield_meltdown

    [re=103055]Borat[/re]: The only place in Alaska where you can get Truck Nutz (according to the site posted by Facehead) is Wasilla. A town with 6,000 people has two retailers stocking truck nutz. Truly, Caribou Barbie is the candidate that can address our truck nutz crisis having solved it in Wasilla.

  • BobLoblawLawBlog

    All these stats should have the words “in bed” after them (yes, I’m mentally a third-grader). Case in point: McCain said “god” 69 times. In bed. True story.

  • Strictly for the Tardcore

    [re=103082]facehead[/re]: How could anybody see this and think, “Well, that is a straight man, if ever I did see one”?

  • Strictly for the Tardcore

    [re=103108]BobLoblawLawBlog[/re]: Hahahah, that was a good one. We all know WALNUTS! hasn’t slept with a woman since his honeymoon to the trophy trollop.

  • Viva la Cynthia

    Ooh fun! Now I know how to spend the first hour of work today!

  • Miller

    Where is the giant plastic vagina for lowbrow women to slap on the back of their conveyance? I smell a marketing opportunity.

  • Strictly for the Tardcore

    [re=103139]Miller[/re]: Dude, if someone released one, every redneck male in my hometown (re: every male over the age of 35) would be arrested for fuckin’ his car in broad daylight. Men love their cars more than their women ’round these parts…

  • pondscum

    [re=103050]facehead[/re]: How is it possible for anyone on this site to not know about the nutz?

  • fuzznuts

    [re=103038]Terry[/re]: That’s 52 times more than the total republican party count, They’re busy pretending that the last 8 years never happened, that some un-named democrat must have been the “decider” and that’s why we’re in such deep shit. I think the republicans will be changing their party name to the altzheimers to explain away how so many morons still think Reagan was a clever politician and not some actor reading lines provided to him. On the other hand, the democratic party will henceforth be known as the “avoidists”, in honor of their leadership’s policy of not making waves. Example below:

  • sati demise

    McCain actually has a truck, though. To tootle around on his 13 acre ranch, clearing brush.
    Hopey only has one of those elitist hybrid cars. Just like Obama, half and half.
    At least WALNUTS! has something to hANG HIS NUTZ ON, you libs!

  • fuzznuts

    By the way, assuming U.S. dollars will still be accepted anywhere,
    here’s the financial skinny:
    Truck Nutz are $7.95, Moose nutz are usually under a buck.
    Slightly higher in Alaska.

  • NoWireHangers

    I typed in “My Friends” and “Hope” and my computer exploded.

  • jimh

    God DAMN IT. I am writing now to request at LEAST one Truck Nutz related question in the debates, and if it doesn’t happen, I’ll know that everyone is dodging the real issues. Dodging, like the truck, see what I did there? WAKE UP PEOPLE!

    [re=103150]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: Just for you, (NSFW):

  • Borat

    [re=103107]springfield_meltdown[/re]: Great research about Wasilla being the trucknutz capital of Alaska. I’ve also heard its the church capital and meth capital of Alaska. Go figure! The town must be on an upswing. or at least swingin’ a little to the right

  • Borat

    So has anyone taken pixxx of Walnutz 7 cars? Do any of them have trucknutz? What about Mehgan’s sissyboy Prius?

  • lilblackcorvette

    [re=103082]facehead[/re]: I belive the honorable Senator Craig was referring to YOU, Mr Freaky McNasty.

  • facehead

    [re=103153]pondscum[/re]: ???? How is it possible to NOT know about trucknutz? Trucknutz are like the hoola hoop of our generation. Ain’t hip to be square, daddy-o.

  • BobLoblawLawBlog

    [re=103111]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: Except for that lobbyist. Well, they didn’t do much sleeping per say. More like gentle weeping.

  • Borat

    [re=103058]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: It’s a real shame this wasn’t the thread for the weekend. I really don’t see how a Nadirtard would have anything to contribute to our mutual obsession with TruckNutz, the bestest invention on early. Unless there is some kind of child safety or explosion warning that CORPORATE AMERICA IS KEEPING FROM US!!!11!!

  • JimBob

    Actually it turns out if you type”truck” and “nuts” (instead of “nutz”) McCain still said nuts zero times but Obama said it twice. Also if you do “my” and “friends” you get: McCain said “my” 1005 times and “friends” 191 times. Obama said “my” 1197 times and “friends” 101 times. Looks like Obama says “my friends” almost as much as Walnuts! Who woulda thunk it?

  • J05H

    You want some Truck Nutz? I got yer Truck Nutz right here, haters.

    Why do they sway like that? Huh? Someone should ask teh candidates, right after the dogs v cats question

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