America’s Princess of Light, Wall Street Journal columnist Peggy Noonan, has adopted a somber tone for today’s edition of “Declarations.” While sipping on a petite tumbler of butterscotch liqueur and eating pasty crumpets, Noonan writes about how the financial crisis has shown how terribly inept either candidate would be at fixing America’s problems, because neither of them is Zeus or Jesus — basically, how can we expect anything from a president who lacks even a modicum of magical powers, such as mind control or laser-gun eyes? It’s one of those Peggington Noonington columns we love: you disagree with so many obnoxious points along the way, but she manages to end on a few staggering notes that kill you, headlong, right into the weekend.

Here’s how she ends it, after many previous paragraphs of calling both candidates pathetic losers:

I wonder if we follow the election so passionately because we’re afraid. We’re afraid a lot of our national problems are intractable, and the future too full of challenge.

We cannot tolerate feeling this way. So we make believe the election can change everything. And we follow it passionately to convince ourselves its outcome will be decisive and make everything better. We reassure ourselves with pictures of the cheering crowds at the rally. We even find some comfort in the latest story of the latest dirty trick. But deep inside we think: Ah, that won’t work either.

Some part of me thinks we are all making believe this is a life-changing election because we know it’s not a life-changing election. Ever have that thought? Me too. Then there’s a rally or a scandal or a gaffe, and it passes.

SO MANY SWEEPING GENERALIZATIONS, and yet, it’s not far off the mark.

Neither of these candidates, really, has acknowledged the depth of what we’re facing. It’s evident in the way they’ve ignored, or brushed aside, the most important question that they cannot answer: Where the hell is this country going, or what are we aiming for anymore? We don’t make things anymore; our post-industrial economy allows people to either purchase a commoditized college degree and make vast sums of money pushing paper around haplessly or work at Wal-Mart, or McDonald’s. Average real household incomes stopped growing 30-some years ago, and yet we still look at GDP growth as the prime indicator of economic wellness. In good times, everyone buys the new robot from Apple; in bad times, people find that that robot has somehow landed them in $30k of consumer debt which they can’t pay off, and worse yet, they stopped playing with the fucking robot a week after buying it. And also, oh shit, all of those robots were made in China in one of its robust, expansive 3-year-old metropolises.

Sometimes, when we’re bored, we comically invade countries.

So thank you PEGGY for your depressing column, you butt. Still, isn’t John McCain the worst? At least Barry might tax away the national debt a little bit, just enough to stave off the Chinese invasion for an extra 10-15 years, during which time we can all put the finishing touches on our makeshift cardboard rockets to Mars.

Why It’s Getting Mean [WSJ]

Donate with CCDonate with CC


  1. CNN.COM: biggest 2 day gain on dow in years!!!!!! Yipppeee!!!

    If we take out 1/2 trillion in debt every week we could push the sucker to 20.000!!!!

    I swear, this country is so fucked…

  2. We don’t make things anymore; our post-industrial economy allows people to either purchase a commoditized college degree and make vast sums of money pushing paper around haplessly or work at Wal-Mart, or McDonald’s. Average real household incomes stopped growing 30-some years ago, and yet we still look at GDP growth as the prime indicator of economic wellness.

    Basically the same thing Jim Kunstler says, only his blog entries usually end in some sort of prophecy about chaos/looting/etc., which is why I only read his blog when the DOW gains +200.

    His latest post, “A Ripe Moment”, is like Peggy Noonan if she was hyper literate and articulate, and a hell of a lot gloomier.

  3. [re=102314]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: Yeah, and OUTLAW the short selling of stocks! Wahoo! It’s something out of a fevered dream of Kim Jong Il: “In the national interest, stocks may only rise, so as to demonstrate to our countrymen the love for our nation’s glorious future that illuminates the hard work of our financial sector.”

  4. Not to be all grad school, but we really are in need of a good, old-fashioned paradi-whatchacallit shift. The fucking empire is over people. If we’re lucky, we’ll have a soft landing like the British. If not, a hard landing like the Soviets. Or worse.

  5. Remember when statesmen said things like “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat”?

    And “We have nothing to fear but fear itself.”

    Nowadays, it’s just the Usual Collection of Ass Clowns.

    The final insult is that, when it came to demogogues, Ancient Athens had Class Acts like Alcibides. At least they when down in flames with a little style/

    In contrast, we’ve got Chimpy and Company.

  6. Well, merica for darned sure dont need anymore of dem der elitisticals in power. Smartyness people can’t be in office. if stupidified people in office, den we is good. like we bomblast rooskies into stone ages. and we nuke der ass and take da gas. USA USA USA !!!11@!!!!

  7. You guys all suck for being depressed. I beat you to it. I knew the end of the world as we knew was coming. And in all seriousness, I do feel just fine and by fine I mean my mild depression has become my warm blanket.

  8. Whenever there’s a screw up and Democrats are involved, the failure is gigantic and indicative of their inherent inferiority to republicans.

    Whenever Republicans are involved, it just shows that all politicians are equally bad and besides government doesn’t really matter that much anyway.

  9. What a fucking drag.

    I think this sort of cynicism is both what I’ve lived in the last eight years and what I’m choosing to ignore at the moment. Should Obama win and suck, I’ll gladly reclaim my cynicism. Until then, you can keep your Eor Noonan emofest because I feel considerably more comfortable with the black guy than I do with the old one.

  10. Nice.

    Madame Noonan did have one good line years ago when she referred to the Catholic new mass hooey that includes the “hootenanny handshake of peace.” That was superb.

  11. [re=102330]tunamelt[/re]: by this time next year, we’ll all be dancing in the airports for the loose change they throw at us.

    Can someone school us how to say “I’m hungry” in 20 different languages?

  12. Am now praying for a Ron Paul extravaganza attended by thousands of totally retarded people and open to the public so that the sheer idiocy of it all will make everyone forget just how fucked up everything has gotten, and how it seems nothing can ever be put back together again because humpty dumpty fell off the god damned wall and our nation is in a million pieces, and the pharmaceutical companies haven’t even invented a drug yet that can cause an intelligent person to ignore the bullshit that is piling up so fast we will all suffocate in filth by 2010…

    F-U-C-K I-T

  13. A fearless prediction: My beautiful election enters its dark phase.

    What in the hell is that supposed to mean?

    She always sounds like she needs an enema.

  14. untouchable peggy: just cleaning out the gwb stable for starters is an ..ummm.. herculean task.

    i noticed that untouchable peggy visibly moved away when someone got close on the scarborough show. don’t ruin her ‘do or makeup.

  15. [re=102318]Dave J.[/re]: Why is this “we’re all gonna die any way so let’s vote repub and bring it on faster” sentiment gaining steam? WTF!?!?

  16. Peggy just realized that the economic and political philosophies she’s been defending for eons are a sucking black hole of rotten emptiness. It only took 8 years of utter incompetence operating under a delusional the neoconservative ideology punctuated by extreme cronyism to make her see the light.

  17. Hey…look…I know we’re a little bit predictable–but hell, if you’re brain was made of transistors & stainless steel, you might be a little inflexible too.

    Don’t put us in the closet–plug us into the wall & let us watch TV with you.

    Lay off the robots–we didn’t steal your jobs–we’re fucking slaves.

  18. [re=102336]Dernyul[/re]: Yes, yes I believe it is an assfucking avatar. Egads.

    Also, re: Noonan’s column, I think I shall have some vodka and gummi bears now. The weekend is off to a fine start.

  19. “In good times, everyone buys the new robot from Apple; in bad times, people find that that robot has somehow landed them in $30k of consumer debt which they can’t pay off, and worse yet, they stopped playing with the fucking robot a week after buying it.”

    No, Pegster, you’re doing it all wrong. Take a tip from me.

    When things are good, I drink to celebrate.

    When things are bad, I drink to forget.

    Simple, really.

  20. ok so this was so gloomy, but it was a gloomy week! so here’s another point that i didn’t say about what peggy forgot: people want obama to win because of GEORGE W. BUSH GODDAMNIT! it is not statistically possible, in a BARELY just society, for the nominee of bush’s party to win an election right after him. JOHN MCCAIN WOULD DESTROY MATH if he won. have a good weekend.

  21. [re=102351]irisheyes[/re]: MY AVATAR IS NOT PORN. It’s a terrorist cat. Someone above me has an assfucking identity. For me, it’s more of an avocation.

    And yes, I think Lipstick on a Peggy is so miserable because she hates her candidate and the woman that he chose to angle for his job. I don’t believe McCan’t’s spin, nor do I believe that Obama can fix it all…but I guarantee Obama has the intellect and the temperament to achieve at least some part of his plan by engendering a real domestic political consensus. He’s a deft politician and not in the sleazy backwater way of that Alaskan person.

    All I can do is keep my chin up and go to this Gays for Obama thing and set some shit on fire on the way.

    Also, Chris Dodd looks like a sea creature.

  22. [re=102337]Chumley[/re]: How to say “I’m hungry” in South Carolinian: Find a Mormon, point yer shot gun at ‘im, then say “Gimme all yer food!”

  23. I want Hopey to win, but really, neither candidate is going to be able to change much of anything for a while. We’re screwed in a bad, bad way.

  24. I love it when Jim gets all serious and depressing in the afternoon.

    I am going to go home and drink in the dark now because apparently when you live in bumfuckistan a little wind equals no power for ten days or maybe we just get no more electricity since this is the second great depression and all.

  25. [re=102374]Delicious[/re]:

    Drudge has been brutal to Barry lately. Nothing about Sarah’s gaff’s or the polls slipping. Even now, snarky articles about Biden and Michele. Lots on other blogs about Drudge being very anti-Barry.

  26. [re=102368]Delicious[/re]: That article is actually kind of scary. I wonder if the guys and gals at the Onion have any suggestions for lottery numbers…

  27. Well, Peggy, it IS a life-changing election. If Obama wins, it will be our announcement to the real world that our nation has finally graduated from it’s adolescence. It’s hard to gain any respect, admiration, or assistance from the other players in a global economy if we continue to be a selfish, demanding, and obnoxious teenager that repeatedly slams the door on the opinions and reasoning of people that don’t agree with us. So there, poopy-pants!

  28. My only consolation after reading that is the image of Peggy clicking on the send button to email that article to her editor, taking one last sip of sherry, then reaching for her husband’s hand-crafted pheasant gun, and , ever so delicately, giving herself a lead migraine.

  29. See, the thing about Peggy Noonan is she’s a drunken shithead. So, there.
    It was a passive/aggressive attempt to say Vote McCain because so what.

    No Peggy – you go ahead and Suck a Dick, because so what.


  30. [re=102323]NewSpence[/re]:

    I couldn’t agree more. Not to get serious here (and hell knows, when you find yourself in an election conducted entirely through the looking glass why be serious?) but the reason I believe Obama really is JFK’s second coming (without the women) is because, after I read Dreams from My Father, I realized he’s one of the few–maybe the only–leader in Wasthington who, as Colbert would say, Gets it. But in this case, I mean the 21st. century.

    Hep’ me Jesus if Walnuts wins.

  31. The purple wine crisis changes the entire shape and feel of the presidential election. It isn’t just bad news, it’s bad news that reveals what many Mad Dog 20/20 sippers deep down feared, and hoped not to see revealed: that the huge and sprawling financial system of corner, ghetto liquor stores is maintained essentially on the cheap booze buzz of hobo drinking and like, you know, what was I my word… assumptions (that‘s a word, right?); that the problems of lack of cheap booze are deep; that at some level the system looks to have been a house of Sterno cans. It isn’t just bad news; it’s deep (causing them shakes) bad news that reaches into the heart of widespread hobo anxiety.

    A Peggy Noonan column is the modern day equivalent of the 1960s paper and pencil game Mad Libs. She should know.

  32. A little late, but I had to get my digs in before the weekend:
    Now aren’t you wonksters sorry you made so much fun of the Ron P4u1 ReLOVEution? Now that our whole system of fiat money is worth less than the paper it’s printed on?
    Return to the Gold Standard!
    Move Wall Street to Fort Knox!!
    A thousand whore diamonds!!!
    Ron P4u1 4EVA!!!!

    (I’m kidding, sort of, but our whole economic system might as well be based on Monopoly money. That is really not a good thing.)

  33. Gee, guys, why all the gloom. Things could be worse. I mean we could live in the past–I mean the really long ago past before McCain was even born–and things would be really bad. We could be about to be burnt at the stake or guillotined or something, or die of plague. You guys are such lightweights, sniffling about the Dow Jones average going down a few hundred points. Get a grip!

  34. Noonan is a whining drip. It is amazing how she has gotten so much mileage
    out of her years as a speech writer for Reagan. She might have saw a lot
    at the revolution, but she has nothing meaningful to contribute to
    modern political dialogue.

  35. “but she [PegNutty] manages to end on a few staggering notes that kill you”
    I realize that you were graduated from Choate Girls’ School and Field Hockey Lesbian Traing Camp just few years ago, but Pegeen’s opinion piece was directed at the Bush “Investor Class”. As for the rest us, our asset portfolio is locked up in two bags of Purina Puppy Chow, which we keep in a front closet. Yum.
    — S.

  36. [re=102435]InKnockYouUs[/re]: I want to try to explain.

    I think the wonky tonk men and women of this blog are very good at poking fun at all the doom and gloom scenarios the media usually tries to feed us (Killer Bees! Shark Attack! Sarah Palin!). The people who run this block typically over-exaggerate the already typically over-exaggerated claims the media makes, to a humorous effect, whereby we giggle, and perhaps change our undergarments (on a good day).

    But when actual doom and gloom possibilities arise, this is hard to poke fun at, and it is hard to exaggerate as well. When reality is doomy and gloomy, and exaggerated, well, we find it difficult to cope. In short, we are just normal people who are honestly afraid that the entire economic system of the planet is actually going to collapse in the oncoming days, and since we all slept through our economics classes, we have no clue what is really going on, but we are smart enough to know that no one really knows what is going on, which only adds to the fear.

    There’s no normal or proper way to react to this. Our own politicians are quietly crapping in their pants, and we know it. They currently feel as helpless as we do, and we should distrust them now more than ever, because we could all be stockpiling duct tape in a week.

    This is an extremely difficult situation to make fun of, but we must try.

    I am facehead and I approve this message.

  37. Ok so we FINNNNNNNNNALLY get a black president and not only is he only HALF BLACK but he is transferred power when everything is irrevocably fkd up and incapable of being fixed.

    Wait? Did I ever think it would be any other way?

  38. I have an admission to make. I want Dame Peggy Twatwaffle. This is one of those I-don’t-really-know-why-I-just-do things. Maybe it’s that her heart is always in the right place and her head isn’t. Maybe it’s the faux arrogance. She’s just really really trying to be honest and profound. Underneath the good Catholic girl working her brain the right way is a hellion who really just wants to let go. Peggy be mine! Forget you troubles c’mon get happy!

  39. Sorry, I haven’t read all the comments, but seriously who takes Peggy Noonan seriously anymore (except for Peggy Noon)? Ronald is dead; Nancy could care less. By her unscripted ‘Palin is a bullshit pick’ moment, we know what she really thinks. She just needs to keep drawing a paycheck. Bahh…I would read & believe a Gallagher column before Noonan.

  40. Peggy “Bullshit” Noonan drinks way too much…. even for a divorced Catholic white lady over 50. And yet, still, somehow she is able to say… nothing.

  41. [re=102445]DoctorCulturae[/re]: Thankyou for sharing yourself with the group. On a completely anonymous blog where no one takes anything seriously anyway, that must have taken a lot of inner strength.

  42. Fuck you all. Have some goddamned faith that we can still regain some modicum of respectability in the world and can somewhat rebuild our economy and our environment. I didn’t get a graduate degree in Conservation Biology because I like to watch monkeys have sex and eat bugs off their asses (though that was a big part of it), and I CERTAINLY didn’t do it because enjoy carrying 20K in debt. I did it because I actually think there is going to be a huge new opportunity for biologists, ecologists, engineers, electricians, plumbers, and basically the entire construction industry to fundamentally change the way we build communities, travel, and interact with the natural world. We are at a turning point in history, and it DOES matter who we elect, because we need someone in the White House (along with a sympathetic congress) who understands that investment in infrastructure is a GOOD thing, and is the one and only way we can actually climb out of the pit we’re in now and create a bright new future for ourselves and our children.

    So screw all you downers, I’m going out for beer and will make a toast to Hopey the Unicorn and his wonderful rainbow of change.

  43. [re=102450]facehead[/re]: You are welcome. I’m glad you appreciate the effort. I have 3 cases of duct tape so Dame Peggy and I will be safe for 10, maybe 12 or 13 minutes.

  44. [re=102435]InKnockYouUs[/re]: I’m not gloomy. I’m FUCKING ANGRY! I put myself through college, worked 8 jobs over the last 26 years, raised a family, voted and paid taxes, and tried to put some money aside for retirement. Then Dubya and his greedy Republican friends ran this country into the ground, just so THEY could become even more obscenely rich. The stock market tanks, the big banks go bankrupt, and Dubya and his buddies BAIL OUT THE GREEDY BASTARDS! Meanwhile, I lost my job 8 months ago because my former boss (slimy Republican toad) decided on a whim that my job didn’t matter anymore. I’ve applied for over 300 jobs, I’ve had a total of 8 interviews, no job offers, and my unemployment runs out next month. I cashed out my 403b just to pay the bills and put food on the table. The American Dream is a bloody goddamn nightmare for me. No one is bailing me out.

    No, I can’t be snarky tonight. I’m FUCKING ANGRY, and I want PAYBACK! I want that west-Texas mushmouth impeached, out of the White House and thrown in jail for his stupid, senseless war! I want Dick Cheney put in solitary confinement and denied his civil rights for the rest of his miserable life! I want Karl Rove found in contempt of Congress and thrown into a super-max prison! I want all the idiots who voted for “The Patriot Act” to be sent to Gitmo and waterboarded! I want Walnuts and Cindzilla and Caribou Barbie to drink themselves blind and go down in FLAMES on November 4.

    God damn it, I want my country back!

  45. Nooner has quite the dilemma. She so wants to snark on Bible Spice, but she cannot.

    And her stock portfolio has hit the skids like everyone else.

    Of course she would not be drinking this much if it did not affect her personally, where it hurts her the most, in her evening bag.

  46. [re=102453]CivicHoliday[/re]: Oh, we already have “investment in infrastructure.” Congress is busily “investing” in the infrastructure of Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac and AIG, among others!

  47. Okay guys, sorry. I guess you can just include me in the unicorn coalition with civic holiday. It’s just that the fake world-weariness of this silly drama queen Peggy Noonington doesn’t cut it for me. I spend a lot of time hanging out with some real gloomy gusses: Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, you know those who have really looked into the abyss.

  48. [re=102458]madirishman[/re]: You’re not alone. We’ve gotten into crazy debt trying to live the American Dream on one income so that I could stay home and raise our kids. Now that they’re older and I’m back to work we can barely make enough money to cover our basics. And this dumb fucker McCain thinks everything is okey dokey. My visceral reaction to Palin Fuckhead is getting so strong that just hearing that infinitely irritating voice raises my blood pressure. But when those moment come, I breathe, smile, and look at this:

    And I relax. Try it- from one mick to another.

  49. [re=102442]facehead[/re]:
    — I think the wonky tonk men and women of this blog are very good at poking fun at all the doom and gloom scenarios —

    We be so so ashamed. Let me check the current vakue of my 401(k) to verify that. I can live two years in retirement on Pop Tarts and rain water. Country First.

  50. ypu guys are awesome is all i can say. i was around in the days of anna marie cox. i sent her a blurb about something that she published and sent me an e-mail back telling em it was “brilliant”. i would be proud to have you someday think i am “brilliant” too.

  51. I worried this would happen after the live mike caught Peggy trashing Palin — Dame Peggy cannot get over the failure of McCain to pick Mittens for VP, on account of america hating him for his magic underwear, oh and being a complete fraud and all, and has sunk into a deep depression that only a kiss from Reagan’s cold dead corpse could rouse her from.

  52. “me thinks we are all making believe this is a life-changing election because we know it’s not a life-changing election. Ever have that thought? Me too. Then there’s a rally or a scandal or a gaffe, and it passes.”

    Yeah, it’s passing like a dry difficult Peggyturd™ through my colon.

  53. Well that’s what nooners says in public.
    We know how that slag really feels about Bible Spice, remember “It’s over.” ?

    Face it you pompus christ-bitch, black is the new president. And it won’t be easy keeping a Bill Clinton surplus budget. Bush and Cheney clogged up the toilet, took the plunger, and broke off the flush handle.

  54. “From Mr. Obama himself, a new edge. He tells an audience in Elko, Nev., to “argue” with McCain supporters and “get in their face.” Bambi is playing Chicago style. No doubt everyone around him has been saying, and for some weeks now, “Get tough.” But this is not how to get tough, and it does not reflect a shrewd reading of what the moment demands. People want depth, not ferocity. We’ve got nerves that jingle-jangle-jingle.”

    Awww — Peggy tinks Bawack is being meens. (Adult voice): Barack, you have made Peggy sad. Because Peggy hates it when hippies and negroes and liberals do anything but flail around like a fish on a gaff when Republicans make shit up about them. It’s all uppity and, like, demanding special rights when you call them on their lies and mock them for not knowing what the Bush doctrine is.

    And just to show what fairness really means, maybe I’ll cite a study that may not even exist (because you know how hard it is to provide sources on the internets) and then maybe throw some shit on Obama and see if it’ll stick….

    “A study out Thursday said the Obama campaign has become more negative than the McCain campaign. There is the hacking—no one at this point knows by whom—of Sarah Palin’s personal email account. “

    Gee Peggy, I wish everyone were as straightforward and honest as your delusional self-image must tell you that you are. But here’s two things I’m not: First, I’m not sorry that your candidate has proved time and again that he’s hopelessly dishonest, unknowledgeable even in his professed field of expertise, psychotically reckless in his choices, as evidenced by his selection of an unvetted know-nothing while she’s being investigated, and by your cavalier militancy towards necessary allies like Russia and real allies like fucking Spain! I mean, do we really need to piss more people off? And second, I’m not sorry that the Obama campaign is astute enough to call McCain out on his obvious unfitness and is beating you over the head with it to the point where you find it giving you the vapors. If it’s any consolation, though, it distresses me too — because he should probably be doing it a lot more.

    But really, Peggy, the saddest part of this weepy little je ne m’accuse pas fucking travesty is your desperate, Scarlett-O’Hara-like grab at the disappearing figure of apathy, as though it were your last hope:

    “A final point. Do you ever have the passing thought that the presidential election doesn’t matter as much as we think? Whoever wins will govern within more of less the same limits, both domestically and internationally.”

    Is that all you fucking have left? The Nader 2000 argument? Do you really want to compare the hypothetical administration of a boring, intelligent, overly wonky but sometimes mired in detail Al Gore years to the real, actual even-the-fireproof-tiles-are-on-fire administration of George Dubya Bush? Really?!

    In closing, Peggy, I certainly hope this is another one of your vile concocted lies to appease the death trolls you can barely bring yourself to hope will win this election. Because this cannot be evidence of the coolly rational human thought you pretend to admire. On the bright side, however — if the intellectual giants of the conservative movement are all turning out maudlin meditations on their navels like overrought 14-year-olds who just found out Lance Bass is gay, then I am filled — filled — with hope that an intelligent and capable man like Barack Obama can actually win. From where you’re standing, it’s an ominous sign that the gate to the prison is opening. But from my perspective — standing in the yard where I’ve waited the last eight years for those same doors to open — it’s a magical sight. And honey — if you drop the soap, just leave it on the floor.

  55. [re=102458]madirishman[/re]: You “want [your] country back”?

    You still don’t get it, do you? Any of you.

    It never was “your” country. You and everyone else have been swallowing a bullshit lie for your entire lives. You’re just now waking up.

    Welcome to Reality. Like most real things in Life, it’s painful.

    (Oh, and Benazir Bhutto is still DEAD.)

  56. [re=102458]madirishman[/re]: I’m probably less than half your age and I agree completely. At this point, I’d cheer on anyone who plans to burn a the pigs who caused this disaster at the stake.

  57. [re=102478]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Jesus H. Christ, I’ve been a little ranty lately. Sorry if that annoyed anyone — it must be the blind, festering rage coming out again. I’m going to go chew on a martini glass and try to relax.

  58. Snippet:

    I guess a wee-town mayor be sort o’ like a “community organizer,” ‘ceptin’ that ye be havin’ actual responsibilities. I might add that in wee towns, we dasn’t quite know what t’ make o’ a candidate who lavishes praise on workin’ swabbies when they be listenin’, an’ then talks about how bitterly they clin’ t’ the’r religion an’ cannons when them swabbies aren`t listenin’.

  59. [re=102481]SayItWithWookies[/re]: normally i’d say she’s not worth the energy for a good rant. but it was a good rant to us. it hit the spot like yummy chocolate cookies and cold milk.

  60. [re=102481]SayItWithWookies[/re]: You know something, though? You and [re=102458]madirishman[/re] pretty much said exactly what I’ve been feeling since 2003.

    I am a smartass. Even in my real life, snark and sarcasm are my defense mechanisms. I avoid expressing anger or frustration. So, no, it’s not annoying, it’s liberating, that my fellow Wonketteers can voice the pure blind rage better than I ever could.

    [re=102479]Neilist[/re]: The phrase “my country” can mean a lot of things, and everybody would define “their country” differently, but fuck it. These criminal shitheels have taken a country that I love, and through idiocy, incompetence, and the occasional malicious intent, they have ruined it. The economic prosperity and foreign peace of the Clinton years are a fucking fever dream now. I see only one shred of hope that we can change it.

    And Benazir Bhutto’s husband is now Pakistan’s President, so go eat a dick.

    And if I misread your snark or offended you, I’m sorry but I’m pissed.

  61. This is getting so ridiculous, the pic I have for my avatar is the greatest. My 15 year old daughter designed it. Check it out, use it, post it, etc…. Please feel free. It is amazing, the understanding they have.

  62. Peggy, my sweet, it’s really very simple. Our side offers hope. Your side, quite openly, says there is no hope. You just said it yourself. So, there are two choices. Come to the light and embrace Barry, which would really, truly change your life and bring you a whole new set of friends, or stay home and drink on election day. If you actually pull the lever for McCain, you guarantee your own unhappiness.[re=102453]CivicHoliday[/re]: Hear! Hear!

  63. [re=102484]sati demise[/re]: [re=102485]HuskyMescan[/re]: [re=102486]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: Oh good — I sometimes worry about being more bitter than entertaining. And this week’s been especially so.

    And I’m glad Noonan’s getting all Marcus Aurelius on us — the more she and her friends are filled with despair, the happier I’m gonna be.

    [re=102487]Jenster[/re]: I can tell it’s based on a McCain lawn sign, but it’s too small to read — what does it say?

  64. [re=102481]SayItWithWookies[/re]: You serve up a nice tasty rant to go with your usual ultra-dry snark. I’ll have another — and make it double, please.

  65. [re=102486]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]:
    Wow! Gen Y gets “fucking angry”!!! at last! It took this long? Sorry, I’m a bit seasoned.. I welcome all vitriol to rebut my total generalizations. It’s nice to see people dissatisfied for once. Yay!

  66. [re=102487]Jenster[/re]: McCalin? Oh dear. I thought it was embarrassing when kids started showing up in school named Reagan. I wonder how many abortions the average McCalin will have before finishing high school.

  67. [re=102478]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
    If a martini is all that it takes to produce such eloquence, then I’ll send over a case of vodka.

    Pegs is just miserable because she sees the utter foolishness of McCain/Palin. For, if by some miracle they pull off a win, it would be tragic for this country, and, for the Republicans, who would become ‘persona non grata’ for hastening the downfall of this once proud land.

  68. [re=102487]Jenster[/re]: Do you mind if I fix the spelling and use it? Full props to your daughter of course!
    I’m stress testing a new vodka this evening, ПОЛЯРКА ( POLYARKA, North Pole) so my fixed version may be even worse.

  69. “…made in China in one of its robust, expansive 3-year-old metropolises.”

    Does Peggy Noonan actually know anything? Chinese metropoleis (the correct plural) are usually at least a thousand years old, often older.

    Why does anyone take her or any of the pundits seriously? They get their “insights” from ouija boards or wild hairs up their arses, apparently, not experience or research.

    Zhu Bajie

  70. [re=102501]zhubajie[/re]: Ha ha, that was my line, not Peggy’s! Watch the blockquote beginning/ending.

    Aside from your correction of my grammar, new huge cities are developing in China at a pretty rapid pace — obviously Beijing and Shanghai are very old! If you’d like more information about how there are more than two cities in China, I recommend reading any article about China.

    “Jim Newell”

  71. [re=102314]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: just sayin’: if you had a $100 stock and it went down 90% one day and then up 200% the second day you would have #30. cnn is so clever they know third grade math.

  72. [re=102481]SayItWithWookies[/re]: In closing, Peggy, I certainly hope this is another one of your vile concocted lies to appease the death trolls you can barely bring yourself to hope will win this election. This ought to be printed on the back of the $1 bill.

    Slightly O/T, but I wonder what it’s like inside the febrile brain of Lieberman about now. His spot on the ticket has gone to a snowbilly ditz from the boondocks, his dear dear friend McCain is running a dishonerable campaign, and come January 20, regardless of who wins, he’s going to be in political Siberia himself, truly a man without a country (except Israel).

  73. In 2004, lots of us were convinced this was ‘the most important election of our lifetime.’ We said we’d move to Canada if Bush won. We said ‘anyone but Bush’. Unfortunately, people couldn’t just vote no to Bush. They had to vote for John Kerry. And so Bush won. And then his sneak attack social security plan tanked, and the Democrats won congress. And nothing much changed. Now the Democrats have a candidate who is much more charismatic than John Kerry. And yet he has squandered every issue (health care–he’s for something no one understands, war–he’s for it in Afghanistan, maybe also in Iraq, anyway, not talking about being against war anymore, economy–vapid platitudes because he basically supports NAFTA and whatnot, civil liberties–FISA). So basically, we’re just telling people to not vote for the ancient guy and his moosehunting, hot chick sidekick. And this might work. Certainly I hope so. And I hope as things continue to unravel, Obama turns to his best instincts, and appeals to the best aspects of Americans. But all this hope is not a plan so much as a prayer.

  74. Peggy just misses the 80’s when it was morning in America for Ronny Raygun and afternoons drinkin’ and fornicatin’ in the West Wing. Now all her lovers are dead, even those damn Reagan Democrats!

  75. [re=102458]madirishman[/re]: “This is Barack Obama and I approved this message.”

    Srsly, you should send the Obama campaign a video using your post verbiage as a rant. I think “real people” ads would help.

  76. [re=102524]slavojzizek[/re]: Oh no, I’d say things changed after the Democrats took over Congress. They’ve consistently given Bush things that not even their Republican predecessors would, like the FISA amendment you mentioned, in an effort to look more “centrist” or “patriotic.” At this rate, it appears that there’s a better chance of “Bush’s third term” with an Obama presidency rather than McCain, as he spends the next four years trying to pander to the bitters.

    Barr is a hypocrite (but good luck on that lawsuit in Dallas), McKinney is ehhh, Nader is ew… who are the Socialists running with this time around?

  77. For all who want a little payback for 2000, here is a nicely ironic scenario.

    We also have two House polls. As expected, the renomination of Rep. Don Young (R-AK) for Congress may pretty much end the GOP’s hopes to hold the seat against Democrat Ethan Berkowitz. This seat is an especially important one because the presidential race is so close that a 269-269 tie is certainly a possibility. In that case, the new House elects the President with each state getting one vote. That would mean Berkowitz gets as much say as all of California. Like Earl Pomeroy (D-ND) and Stephanie Herseth-Sandlin (D-SD), he would be in a situation of being a Democrat in a state that went wildly for McCain. Pomeroy has been around for a while and can probably withstand the pressure applied to him to vote as his state did, but Herseth-Sandlin and Berkowitz as relatively newbies will get introduced to power politics real fast. A situation in which Berkowitz, Herseth-Sandlin, and Pomeroy got together for lunch in a smoke-free room to pick the President would be kind of unprecedented. Here’s what they look like.

  78. [re=102496]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: Trust me, it’s not that we don’t care, we’re just a bit jaded. If this election changes nothing, the massive youth voter turnout and that will end and we’ll just crawl back into our hidey-holes.

    [re=102528]Guppy06[/re]: Gah, I hate this idea that the Dems are giving Dubya whatever the hell he wants just ’cause. The Dems do not have the “magic majority” where they can just overrule his veto for every bill he doesn’t like, which basically includes anything with any librul intent. If I’m wrong, prove it, but I’m pretty sure I’m not.

    Secondly, maybe this is just me drinking the Hopey Kool-Aid, but I refuse to believe that Barry’s not smart enough to realize that the best pander is getting shit done. If he can turn shit around in four years, that’s the best campaign ad possible.

  79. [re=102531]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: In the case of the FISA amendment, there’d have been nothing to veto or sign, just filibuster it and it never gets past the floor. But then the talking points would have been that the Democrats hate our freedoms and want to leave America exposed to more Mohammedan attacks, and so the pussies decided to actively give Bush both warrantless wiretaps and retroactive immunity for Ma Bell. It wasn’t “pass a bill the president won’t sign,” but rather “give the president the bill he’s asking for.” All Barry had to do was vote the same way as Hillary, but he couldn’t even do that much.

    If giving Bush and the neocons what the previous three, Republican-controlled Congresses flat out said “No” to is Barry’s way of “getting shit done,” then I’d rather he stop doing shit.

  80. So now it is the weekend and our fearful leaders go away? And leave us to flail about in our puddles of tears, or, in some cases, boil in a cauldron of justified, table-thumping rage.

  81. [re=102531]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: “I hate this idea that the Dems are giving Dubya whatever the hell he wants just ’cause. The Dems do not have the “magic majority” where they can just overrule his veto for every bill he doesn’t like, which basically includes anything with any librul intent. If I’m wrong, prove it, but I’m pretty sure I’m not.”

    By my last count, Republican Senators had ‘filbustered’ 84 major pieces of legislation.

  82. The reality of the past week has utterly destroyed any of the snark posted here. The fucking free market republicans, McSame and company, are now market regulation enthusiasts. The government of Ron “it is the problem” Reagen,is now the only solution. The bastards that made all the money will not lose anything close to what they made and if the dems suggest that they should increase taxes on the ones that made the money Repugs say it will destroy jobs and the economy. People will not vote for Barry because he’s black while at the same time acknowledging that McSame has no clue about the economy. I feel like I am in a Orwellian story. I cannot get drunk or stoned enough to even feel ambivalent about this and I used to not give a shit. This is biblical in its fucked upness.
    Thank you I feel better now.

  83. Too focused on the issues to dwell on the tattooed lip liner?

    Too focused on economics to make the link between people’s fashion choices and what they say about a person’s judgment?

    Does that hairdo say ‘Leader of the Free World’ to you? I think NOT.

    Issues are the hobgoblins of those who don’t judge people on their fashion sense.

  84. Know what I like about Barry is that he is smart – regardless of one’s opinion about the $700B “bailout”. Check this out from Politico.

    There’s only one candidate who’s called himself “fundamentally a deregulator” when deregulation is part of the problem. My opponent actually wrote in the current issue of a health care magazine – the current issue – quote – “Opening up the health insurance market to more vigorous nationwide competition, as we have done over the last decade in banking, would provide more choices of innovative products less burdened by the worst excesses of state-based regulation.” So let me get this straight – he wants to run health care like they’ve been running Wall Street. Well, Senator, I know some folks on Main Street who aren’t going to think that’s a good idea. “

  85. [re=102528]Guppy06[/re]: I get the impression that Obama will not pander while in office. He will consult, listen, gather information, ask experts, try to get a consensus…..blah, blah, blah. All that boring stuff Bush refused to do that is the core of good governance.
    I could be wrong. But so far, Obama seems to have a distaste for pandering. He speaks his mind, usually has a good reason for his failings, but is able to have an honest conversation about any subject. There is a big difference in America trying to win an election (with our major media owners dropping from 50 to 6 corporate owners in the past decade), and actually governing.

    [re=102534]Guppy06[/re]: If there ‘was’ any kind of terrorist attack in this country before November, and Obama had voted against FISA, the election would have been lost for him right then. The GOP would have blamed the whole thing on Obama being soft on terrorism by not supporting FISA. Everyone knows this. It was the worst case scenario choice.

  86. Barry is not the lesser of two evils. He is actually a brilliant, learned man, who is doing what he needs to do to win an election. Again, I repeat myself, have some fucking faith. Maybe I’m too young to be completely bitter about the process. But I know this much: the right-wing thrives in an atmosphere of cynicism and contempt for government. They WANT you to feel like nothing matters and nothing will change, because it feeds into the mythos that the only good gov’t is a DEAD gov’t. Grover and his bathtub, remember? Well sorry, I don’t think we’re limited to a single greatest generation. I want to work, I want to be called to action, I want to be asked what I can do for my country, I want to sacrifice for the greater good. If we all just sit around and bitch and moan, we’re doomed. We have to wake the fuck up, people. WAKE UP. Dennis K. might be a lawn gnome, but he is on to something. WAKE UP.

  87. [re=102368]Delicious[/re]: Easily the best article ever written. When you re-read it these 7 plus years later, its uncanny in how much of it they got absolutely right.

  88. [re=102335]Hutch[/re]: I heard the “hootenanny Mass” line in the mid-1960’s from my Dominican priest Philosophy prof at DePaul — Peggy was recycling a joke from the days when the Mass went from Latin to English. I’m sorry, Hutch, but I must deduct three Mel Gibson points for this infraction.

    Newell, perhaps you missed the point. The GOP wants us to turn off and get sad instead of showing up at the polls to vote for Obama/Biden — “it’s all meaningless, we elephant people don’t really trust either of them; don’t even bother to vote.” The bulk of McCain’t strategy is to make a farce out of the campaign so that cynical young voters will not turn out — to paraphrase the late Johnny Cochran, “if they turn out, McCain/Palin must burn out.” Noonan is just another Rove whore trying to hypnotize the masses, however high-priced she may be. She’s just spewing the party line, which makes for a nicer column than looking hard into the economy.

  89. [re=102547]lawrenceofthedesert[/re]: I don’t think “the masses” are paying much attention to what Peggy Noonan of the Wall Street Journal writes in her weekly column, as you allude to. And I certainly don’t think that Barack Obama and John McCain are the same at all. I’m voting for Obama, and I think it’s important to do so. But I’m not really worried about getting sucked into Peggy Noonan’s Secret Hypnosis Conspiracy if I think she makes a salient point about how both candidates appear weak against the “suddenly” apparent backdrop of late Western capitalism reaching its endgame. John McCain doesn’t understand this of course, but if you think Barack Obama does, then it’s disappointing that politics, presumably, prevent him from really acknowledging some of these frightening fundamental truths dictating our way forward. Now if my observation that Barack Obama has been somewhat lacking a strong, focused message lately makes some young voter sad enough to stay at home on election day, then I’ll have to live with that.

  90. [re=102545]CivicHoliday[/re]: Yay, Obama is “smart,” just like how the local newsrag endorses the incumbent congresscritter because he’s “experienced,” neither adjective answering the question “To what ends?”

    And he’s “doing what he needs to do to win an election?” Guess what: there’ll be another election. If this is the crap he pulls for 2008, what’ll he end up doing to win 2012? Do we have to wait until 2014 to see what he “really” plans on doing in office?

    And you can keep your “Greatest Generation.” I have no desire to see another generation grow up with a childhood punctuated by rampant sodomy from Wall Street, only to have that childhood end when the little man from the draft board shows up on their 17th(!) birthday, to go serve in a war where 3/4 of the men in uniform are conscripts (pretty sure Vietnam saw more volunteers). I suspect it would have been cold comfort to the boys who died in some Eurotrash hellhole before they were even old enough to vote that the children of those that survived (i.e. the REMFs) will get fantastic book deals by writing masturbatory OWI fantasies about a life they had no say over from the cradle to their early, rain-soaked grave. That’s not greatness I can believe in, I’ll take mediocre any day.

  91. On a much happier note, WALNUTS economic advisor was just on MSNBC talking up how McLame will make everything better when he’s Prez because after all, he was a big proponent of regulating…boxing! YAY. At least we’ll be able to rock ourselves to sleep in our hobo holes safe in the knowledge that the mighty World Boxing Association will stand strong as the rest of the country folds in on itself and disappears in a puff of Chinese flavored dust.

  92. [re=102600]Guppy06[/re]: I’m gonna leave it at this: I have yet to hear a coherent argument as to why we should expect there to be an election 2012 if Barry loses in 2008.

  93. [re=102600]Guppy06[/re]: The main point about McCain is, he endorsed and voted for banking deregulation in 1999, even after his insider experience with the S&L banking failure and bail out. McCain learned nothing from that experience. He is either really dumb (as his grades at Annapolis show) or he is a ideologue for failed Republican economic theory.

    McCain has refused, twice, in public forums to take the draft off the table. He has insulted both Russia and Spain. He is a military man, and not a smart man at that. He will expand this war, if not deliberately, then through sheer unsuitable temperment.

    Why anyone would support putting a man like this in power-either by directly voting for him or refusing to vote for the opposition candidate..particularly after the last 8 years, just defies common sense.

    And considering McCain is 72 and has had melanoma, there will be a one in six chance of a President Palin if they manage to steal this election. Do you want the Christian Taliban in power? That is another question, my friend.

  94. [re=102633]Strictly for the Tardcore[/re]: Hell, I’ll be convinced there’s going to be an election in 2008 sometime around November fifth. And that still doesn’t guarantee there’ll be an inauguration on January 20th, either.

  95. [re=102446]WadISay[/re]: “…the legitimate anger sparked by the media’s personal attacks on Sarah Palin and her family…”

    TOTALLY forgetting she got caught bashing Palin!

  96. [re=102600]Guppy06[/re]: Wow. You sound hopeless and angry and apathetic. Congratulations, you’ve obviously read enough Nietzsche to realize the world is meaningless and we should just all sit on our asses and die slow sad lonely deaths.

    Well forget you, I’ve got a future to lead. I believe we can be better, and I’m not letting people like you hold me back.

  97. [re=102658]CivicHoliday[/re]: Hear, Hear!!! Thank you – your post, along with many others here, has lifted some of my gloomy, depressed fuckitallness.

  98. [re=102658]CivicHoliday[/re]: I believe we can at least get back to the old days, when we were a nation of laws, not men.

    Biden may chase Bush down to Paraguay to have a little chat. hahah!

  99. The dumb slag is waiting for Reagan to rise from the dead and declare “its morning in America again.”

    Then our financial crisis will be solved by eggs over easy, flapjacks and bacon.

  100. Well, I just ruined another good shirt burping up bile after reading yet another maudlin introspection piece about the deep soul-searching we endure every 4 years. Thank god I can go back to merely writhing, weeping and gnashing my teeth after the inauguration.

    At least she didn’t somehow tie this into a story about her dog dying when she was five or something.

  101. lawrenceofthedesert: You make an interesting point. Who is Dame Peggy playing to anyway? She’s always partisan. She was a speechwriter for Raygun. Heaping on the melancholic sentiment is one of her trademarks. And I agree, in this instance she’s sending code to the right, perhaps inadvertently but I doubt it, that it’s expected and okay not to care. She’s setting up the left for a sucker punch. After almost 30 years of this hooey I’m not buying it.

  102. Meh… The American people will lynch whoever wins in `08 when they realize that the days of bottled tap water, SUVs and sprawl are not only over, but were a terrible waste that was done on credit. Half the population of the country will latch on to a Jeebus General for one final rampage through the Mid-East.

  103. [re=102658]CivicHoliday[/re]:
    I think you’re got Nietzsche backwards. You’re last sentence is Nietzschean (provided you are prepared to face the meaninglessness and death).

  104. She is such a right wing whore. I forced myself to read this article- it took 5 hours to get the feeling back in my brain.
    This statement told me all I needed to know:
    “We cannot tolerate feeling this way. So we make believe the election can change everything.”
    Noonan: why don’t you go make believe you are a real journalist instead of a fascist hit man for the right. This was a Flat out attempt to breed mass apathy and reduce voter turn out.
    To make everyone remember how large this bitch is lying; look what a nose dive into the sewer the U.S. took after the Bushites barged in. Ya that election changed EVERYTHING- for the WORSE.
    On the other hand we have had our Roosevelts, Kennedys, Clintons, etc who left the U.S. in better shape than when they were elected.
    So chin up- and remember that PN always speaks with forked tongue- the side not firmly planted between Tricky Dicky’s butt cheeks.

  105. Wow, now I am the one who is depressed. Did anyone read about this new bail out plan Bush is proposing? Apparently this guy Paulson, the Treasury secretary is going to take over the whole country.

  106. Dear Ms Noonan

    “President Bush did not address the nation on the crisis until Thursday of this week, almost a week after it began…” A week? A WEEK??!! Hey, Peggy Puddingbrain, Bush and his merry band of blockheads have been twiddling their thumbs and watching the starship USS Financial System head for the shithouse at warp speed for more than half a decade.

    As for your sub-literate whine about how no-one can, like, actually change anything anyway (subtext: So we might as well stick with these venal swines, right?), I seem to recall the booming economy and the balanced budget left by the last President. Golly, the next er…“leader” sure changed things, didn’t he, Peg?

    Here’s a thought for you: Next time Dead-Eye Dick goes out hunting, why don’t you join him…

    Best Regards
    The Captain.

  107. I think she is right on one level.

    Neither of them are that inspring. Would I want to lay down my life and follow them into battle or even around the corner? Not particularily.

    Save yourselves, people. Be the change you want in your country. It’s time for all of us to stop wishing for, and worshipping, false idols.

  108. Memo to Ms. Noonan : Reagan is still dead. He’s not coming back. Deal with it you stupid broad.
    Spare me your ‘Declarations’. I’ve got a declaration for ya: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

  109. [re=102829]Wagamuffin[/re]: How is Obama not inspiring? He isn’t if you just assume off-hand he’s an empty suit that people worship with no basis. If that is your starting point, you’ll never find someone worth following. You probably would say the same of another JFK at this point. I do agree that we have to be the change we want, and that’s one of the things I really value about Barack’s campaign, because he’s calling on us to work for what we want.

  110. [re=102869]vigilante[/re]: Wow. Nader. You know, I don’t want to dis the guy, because I actually do agree with a lot of the work he’s done, such as for auto safety regulations and curbing pollutants, but I’m sorry, if you think that Obama and McCain are exactly the same, and you’re willing to throw away a vote on Nader just to make a statement, you obviously haven’t been paying much attention.

  111. Oh crap, I take that back…just read the other thread where vigilante spouts nonsense for five hours and I now see it was a mistake to engage him. I take it back! Ack! Let’s not start another thread of insanity!

  112. Miss Manners: Ooh, so sorry Peggers N – whatever!, that’s so redundant: ahem, should be “tasty” crumpets. (SIGH) Anyone using the term “crumpets” knows by default that (duh) they’re made of pastry, dear. Shhsh. What a twit. Pass the sherry, please.

  113. [re=102867]CivicHoliday[/re]: You know what scares me about the hype? That the good feelings can’t be sustained after the election—because the expectation bar is set so high and the “plan” is nowhere to be seen, thus far.

    Actually, if JFK were here I would be excited (and not in the way you might assume).

    The Peace Corps. A man on the moon. Those were things he articulated and then helped make happen. Where is the big idea from Obama? Yes, a call to individuals to “ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country” would be nice right about now. A call to arms without some sense of “what” and “how to” is a hollow sound.

Comments are closed.

Previous articleStocks Basically Flat After MASSIVE GOV’T TAKEOVER OF EVERYTHING
Next article