Tattoo you.Alaskan moron Sarah Palin spends all her time in a tanning bed, listening to Van Halen (the Sammy Hagar version) and making up idiot new names for her next babies. But what if you had been born to the vice president of tattoo parlors? Your editor, for example, would’ve been named “Crunk Petrol Palin.” [Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator]

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