• February 15, 2012
OUR GLORIOUS SENATE RACES

New Terrifying Gordon Smith Ad Is About Terrifying Terrible Rape!

by Jim Newell

3:23 pm September 15, 2008

GAHHHH!!! Sweet crickets, Mister “Senator” Gordon Smith, you are scarier than eight Oregon rapists combined with this ad. [WSJ]

{ 28 comments }

mookworthjwilson September 15, 2008 at 3:26 pm

Ironically, DNA evidence will actually prove that Gordon Smith was the real rapist.

ManchuCandidate September 15, 2008 at 3:26 pm

Gordie’s a Repub!

Why didn’t he mention his party affiliation?

AxmxZ September 15, 2008 at 3:27 pm

I’d hit it.

Godless Liberal September 15, 2008 at 3:27 pm

Okay, but as rapists go, Oregon’s are by far the friendliest. I wouldn’t expect Wonkette, as a member of the anti-rapist media, to print that.

columnv September 15, 2008 at 3:27 pm

What about protecting the victims who are also rapists? I rarely hear that defended.

AnnieGetYourFun September 15, 2008 at 3:28 pm

[re=96406]ManchuCandidate[/re]: He’s an Obama fan, and likes to keep the whole ‘Republican’ thing on the DL.

EnBuenOra September 15, 2008 at 3:28 pm

Quick! Get Sarah Palin to charge the victims for their test kits!

facehead September 15, 2008 at 3:29 pm

insert unfunny attempt at non-humor here.

columnv September 15, 2008 at 3:30 pm

Oh, and rape isn’t funny unless it involves a gorilla raping a woman FOR 5 AND ONE HALF YEARS

spencer September 15, 2008 at 3:45 pm

If the Dems have any balls they would fire back with a response ad where they show a rape victim with the baby that she had to have because she couldn’t get an abortion.

Gopherit v2.0 September 15, 2008 at 3:51 pm

It isn’t every woman that could take such a traumatic and painful experience like rape and use it for personal gain. Why didn’t McCain choose her for a running mate?

Josh Fruhlinger September 15, 2008 at 3:54 pm

It’s a good thing she didn’t get pregnant from said rape, because then pro-life Gordon Smith would have been all “Your rape-baby is a precious gift from God above.”

Scarab September 15, 2008 at 3:58 pm

Darn it. I have this real funny rape joke but it only works if the victim is a handicapped and an orphan.

FlakJack September 15, 2008 at 4:09 pm

My most poignant comment would probably get me banned, so I’ll just point out that El Gordo’s desperation and dissembling clearly know no bounds. He’ll do well as a cabinet secretary in a McCain administration.

AnnieGetYourFun September 15, 2008 at 4:22 pm

[re=96500]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: EVERY sperm is sacred.

lawrenceofthedesert September 15, 2008 at 4:26 pm

The sheer stupidity expected of voters who see this ad betrays a sad cynicism — as if one vote would have changed the legislative outcome, not to mention a suspect’s right to a speedy trial. No diff to these folks between a suspect and a criminal, even though 18 men on Death Row in Illinois were found to be innocent once DNA testing was available. Fascism runs on hatred for fuel. Ah, but if THEY get arrested, then all Marquise de Queensbury rules must apply.

blackdontcrack September 15, 2008 at 4:46 pm

So does this mean I can put out an ad about Sen Smith’s son who committed suicide?

madirishman September 15, 2008 at 4:46 pm

What this poor woman endured is tragic enough. But then Smith exploits her pain and suffering just to get himself elected. The cynicism is breath-taking. I hope the evil fuck gets BURIED in a landslide. I hope he loses the election, too.

jasonelias September 15, 2008 at 5:21 pm

I could tell by the hair that Gordon Smith is a Republican, they’re all beginning to look alike.

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 15, 2008 at 5:41 pm

“He broke into my house when I was only 13.” Since I knew this was a Gordon Smith ad, I was hoping she meant Gordon Smith.

And, while I have tons of sympathy for her. Dear God, has this women not changed hair styles since she in Middle School?

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 15, 2008 at 5:45 pm

Here, I have a joke to make you feel better:

“Did you hear the one about the woman who is attacked on the street by a gorilla, beaten senseless, raped repeatedly and left to die? ”

What? You heard it before?

Hominidx September 15, 2008 at 6:27 pm

What’s the matter, Gordie? Couldn’t find a black rapist?

Oscar Folsom Cleveland September 15, 2008 at 9:46 pm

WHY does Barry “Fake Brown Jeebus” Osama hate women so very very much?!
I did not know that he had spent so much time surfing in Oregon, too.

dilhavarti September 15, 2008 at 10:23 pm

They ran the ad during an SVU rerun, too. Anyone want to go douche?

pixiestyx September 15, 2008 at 10:36 pm

Okay, I’m outing myself as an Oregonian. Gordo is a fuckin’ right-wing slimebag trying to pose as some sort of moderate. His use of this woman for political gain really pisses me off (and I feel so sorry for her and what happened to her as a result of sicko Gilmore, who will never get out of jail, but I’m a little annoyed with her, too. Oh well, her right to free speech.).

However–his company is a repeated environmental violator (http://wweek.com/wwire/?p=12791) and has a history of hiring illegal aliens and paying them for shit (http://wweek.com/editorial/3444/11499/). And he’s a member of the Mormon church, so you know he’s no moderate. He voted with Shrub 90 percent of the time (http://www.stopgordonsmith.com/2007/06/smith_supports.html).

Oddly enough, he represents the conservative wing of the Udall family (http://blog.oregonlive.com/mapesonpolitics/2007/12/gordon_smith_and_the_udall_con.html). But I digress. He actually had an ad running claiming to having worked with Obama trying to benefit from Barry’s popularity and almost assured victory in our state (http://www.oregonlive.com/politics/index.ssf/2008/06/sen_gordon_smith_ad_touts_ties.html). What a phony bullshitter.

[re=96674]jasonelias[/re]: I have always been suspicious of his hair. Just try and find scalp in that part of his…

Bathroom Goblin September 15, 2008 at 10:48 pm

Obligatory cut and paste fact check:

“For the record, when it was a stand-alone bill, Merkley voted to extend the statute of limitations for sex crimes. And he voted to support mandatory life imprisonment for serial sex offenders with possible parole after 30 years. It’s Gordon Smith who voted five times against funding the COPS program (the 100,000-cop neighborhood policing program) and against higher funding for the Violence Against Women program”.

From BlueOregon
http://www.blueoregon.com/2008/09/want-to-see-wha.html
I hope this woman is happy with herself.

SayItWithWookies September 15, 2008 at 10:59 pm

Jaw drops.

[re=96968]Bathroom Goblin[/re]: Jaw drops even more.

The Graphically Odious Prevaricators strike again.

dilhavarti September 16, 2008 at 12:50 am

“In the 1920s, the Oregon Ku Klux Klan was the largest chapter west of the Rocky Mountains and was a powerful force in the state Legislature. Realty boards forbade members from selling property to minorities. In 1945 the Social Work Journal declared Portland the most discriminatory city north of the Mason Dixon Line.”

To be fair, I remember learning this quote as Portland being “the most racist place North of the Mason-Dixon Line,” but then, history is recorded by the victors… ie, The Assholes.

http://www2.eugeneweekly.com/2001/05_31_01/coverstory.html

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