DC Police Ruin 13 Year Old’s Awesome Birthday Party
by Juli Weiner 4:42 pm September 12, 2008
- This mom just gave her daughter some vodka, so why was she arrested for giving her child the best 13th birthday party ever? Was it because later that 13 year old went to the ER with alcohol poisoning? Or was it because the jealous police were just a bunch of losers when they were in middle school? [DCist]
- This DC police officer was arrested for embezzling $180k using some complicated speeding ticket scheme that turns out not to have worked anyway. [WTOP]
- Maryland farmers can no longer dump chicken feces in the Chesapeake. It’s only now this is being mandated. [Washington Post]
- There are more people than ever riding the Metro and for shorter distances than ever. [DC Examiner]
- Oh, finally, some much-needed vapid musings about orchids, and some inept drawings of some other people, who are all missing several limbs, who also muse vapidly about orchids. [Washington Independent]
{ 30 comments }
Right now Vodka is a sound investment for any young child. Once we invade Russia, he’ll be able to turn it around for at least five times the price.
I guess the chicken farmers will have to dump their chickenshit in Congress where it belongs.
Did the people at the Examiner miss the post about how nobody read huge long paragraphs anymore? Especially on Fridays. My head hurts.
Mom???!!! Zat you???
I wish I had been at that party right about now.
“Persian Shield, the Drunkard’s Dream, the Bat-Leaf Passionflower, the Never Never Plant, the Catnip-Leaved Lion’s Ear, the Poet’s Jasmine, the Fosperior Perfection”. If Track were at the Botanical Gardens (instead on a plane to defend Juneau from the South Osettians), he would try to smoke them all. Country First!
BTW: I liked your brother’s drawings.
Wow. I thought the orchid thing was a code or hip new phraseology. But, no, it’s really about orchids…huh.
[re=95002]TGY[/re]: The Bush Administration wants to send it to Haiti as food aid.
[re=95002]TGY[/re]: Actually, I think it works the other way around….
Two of them got alcohol poising from one bottle? Lightweights.
And not one word on Marian Berry in this post?
And Travis Childers said nothing…
[re=95010]irisheyes[/re]: A code? That would make it a cryptorchid. Sorry, bad vet humour.
When I was 23 I was sitting in a restaurant in Waikiki where I lived at the time and was approached by a 40ish woman who said her daughter and friends thought I was “cute” and would I like to join them at her house for a birthday party. The daughter was 15. CREEPY!
And before you smartasses get all smartassy… no i did not ‘hit it’.
If that mom didn’t also sleep with one of her 13-year-old daughter’s friends, meh, she’s not a true card-carrying redneck.
13 year old with vodka…… how old is Piper Palin again??
a 13 year old with Vodka…… how old is Piper Palin, again???
“Maryland farmers can no longer dump chicken feces in the Chesapeake. It’s only now this is being mandated.”
Well, I’ve hear of people being chicken-shit, and actions being chicken-shit, but now we have a chicken-shit law?????
What would our founding fathers say if the could see us now?
More people riding Metro: Public transit is finally cashing in on the perfect storm conditions of millions of obese, out of shape Americans who are unable to walk three blocks, and the rising costs of driving oversized vehicles from door to door!
“Maryland farmers can no longer dump chicken feces in the Chesapeake. It’s only now this is being mandated.”
Joe Lieberman doesn’t care. There’s lots of other rivers in this country to swim in.
McLovin!
@Maverick: You fucked us out of a reply button and cause further retinal damage everytime we have to read that curs-ed ‘M’ word. what’s wrong with Kevotron?
[re=95106]bitchincamaro[/re]: Yikes! Sorry ’bout that. The Mr. Bill Avatar was getting old. I have a strong disliking of the Maverick shtick and felt like being clever. I’ll change it back.
How’s this?
oh fine.
“Maryland farmers can no longer dump chicken feces in the Chesapeake.”
Why the hell not?! That’s what the crabs eat.
[re=95049]azw88[/re]: This chickenshit law will be one of those laws that in 200 years we laugh at. Like the stuff about raping a horse in front of a church, or missing mark on a spittoon.
[re=95290]archer[/re]: all these name changes tonight. any chance you are lotuscortinallc?
Anyway, Kevotron, you made the right move. If you showed up at the hotel room it’s not a 15-year old girl and giggly friends its a 65 year old tattooed Japanese guy in s&m gear. Man, that really sucked. And drilled.
[re=95035]azw88[/re]: a sphincter says what????
Mmmm. Maryland crab-cakes are the best. Now we know why.
Comments on this entry are closed.