Wonkette
Last night Sarah Palin flew back to her ice cave and gave a rousing address to her people on the snowy tundra. An Undercover Moosketeer Obamatard kindly snapped a few candid photos from the rally and sent them along. Here we have the vice-president-to-be in literally the only unflattering photograph we have ever seen of her. And yet! Even here she is not looking crazy-eyed or duck-faced, just vaguely reptilian. Sarah Palin, we salute you.
Your meek undercover operative lodges a small, faint protest. Why doesn’t this person want what’s best for America?
Apparently “community organizer” isn’t just secret code for “Black Panther.” It also means “drag queen.”
We saw these dumb hats all over St. Paul last week. Here it serves as a poignant reminder of how just how immune Alaska Republicans are to even a whiff of sexual innuendo.
Thanks secret anonymous Fairbanks photographer for the photos!
Governor brings the campaign home [Anchorage Daily News]
She does look like she’s about ready to rip her face off like one of those lizard aliens from V: The Mini Series. So when does she swallow a rat?
That last photo reminds me of my favorite scene in “Pi.”
BTW, WTF is with this drill here helmets? Are Repubes now in favor of skull fucking?
That’s it baby. Lick those lips. Now purse them a little. And look down a bit, away from the lens. Like you’ve done something naughty.
That first picture supports Liplinertatoogate. Either that, or she’s really, really bad at matching liner to lipstick. It’s as if a pig…oh, never mind.
See, I don’t get sexual innuendo from those hats at all. I get “drill a hole in my head, I’m not using what’s in there anyway.”
…then the “Drill Here” hat-wearing women got a bill from the Wasilla police department charging her $300 for the rape kit used later that night.
Turn the hat sideways, and it’d be instructions for a much needed frontal lobotomy.
I really don’t want Palin to win, but at least I’ll have something to fwap to for the next 8 years as she helps guide our nation down the toilet.
She looks like she just caught an especially tasty fly.
ManchuCandidate: Yeah, where are the “Drill Here” chastity belts?
Maybe they got Oral sex confused with Aural sex?
ManchuCandidate: You ask that as if it denotes a policy shift. Skull-fucking has always been teh bomb in Republand. However, they are only just now beginning to helpfully label the victims.
Isn’t her son deploying for Iraq or some shit? SHouldnt they be having a quiet dinner at home before he heads off? I dun get it.
Also, she’s pure evil.
i dunno, i think this photo of her isn’t very flattering:
http://www.newser.com/image/134890-3-20080911031317.image
she looks pretty kooky in it…
Does she look… tired to you?
So…Republicans’ heads are full of oil…?
Pubtards for trepanation!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trepanation
Is it just me, or does Sarah Palin sound like Frances McDormand in Fargo? I can’t wait for her to say to Joe Biden during the debates, “Well, there’s no reason to get snippy about it.”
Cogito Ergo Bibo: On a more serious note, my wife made an astute observation. She wondered why the hell anyone would tattoo on make-up, since it limits what you can wear to what matches the permanent clown costume. She said you might do that if you’re selling a product that you always want to look the same, but no woman with an ounce of sense would do it.
Would anyone else put up Pay-Per-View cash to see all four Cenobites from Hellraiser unleashed on a republican rally?
StripesAndPlaids: I think she sounds like Fran Drescher with a Minnesotan accent. Not teh sexy at all.
I wouldn’t drill there — at least not until the price of sawdust and gravel goes up to $110 a barrel.
Gopherit v2.0:
I believe the tatooed eyebrow look has been around for a while. I just assume it’s only popular in south florida.
Gopherit v2.0: That, and I’d think you’d look ridiculous with only lip liner, any time your lipstick wears off (or you choose not to wear any). Let’s face it. That happens a lot. Which means you wander around looking like a coloring book that someone forgot to fill in.
Gopherit v2.0:
Worked for Bristol. Too soon?
I see exactly zero flag pins. Why do they hate America?
What an amazing slogan. It represents perfectly the three pillars of the Republican platform: disregard for environment (offshore/ANWR drilling), bizarre illicit sexual escapades (skull-fucking), and clinging to anachronistic and discredited scientific/spiritual views (trepanning).
When has two words on a hat ever summed up a political party so completely?
Either that’s a really bad suit that Todd is wearing or he has enormous child-bearing hips. I think we figured out who Trig’s mommy really is.
StripesAndPlaids: Wait ’til Biden develops a crush on her mid-debate and comes on like a boisterous Mike Yanagita.
Can we just all admit that Palin is a place holder until Bristol can incubate the spawn of Cheney so that his new incarnation can take his rightful place as Vice President?
Gopherit v2.0: Yeah, where are the “Drill Here” chastity belts? Just because you can’t see them, doesn’t mean they are not there.
Oh, by the way, 9/11!
magic titty: Silly you. Thinking like a good parent.
Ancient peoples used to drill holes in their skulls to “let the demons out.”
I hope McCain’s website trinket shop starts offering “drill here” underwear.
Hats with “Drill Here” written on them? These people are begging for a brain enima.
Gopherit v2.0: Or got her tongue stuck in a fly.
Check out that pic, does Todd have a mullet?
Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Community organizers fight urban poverty. What a joke!
Seriously, if I were Obama right now, I’d put an ad on in St. Louis and Detroit with all the republicans mocking community service and then show photos/interviews with community organizers working to combat the rampant poverty in that city. Because everyone likes mocking people trying to clean up super fucked up cities.
WadISay: Please, oh, please, be careful what you hope for.
http://clothing.cafepress.com/item/drill-here-drill-now-classic-thong/276086296
WadISay: Larry Craig would wear them backwards what.
No wait thats not Todd, its Patrick Swayze!
Gopherit v2.0: http://clothing.cafepress.com/item/quotdrill-herequot-thong/189157168
I was starting to wonder what peeps looked like after a wicked rip on an oxy-pipe.
saridout: No, that’s her seductive blow up doll look. That vixen!
WadISay: At Cafe Press you could order the “classic thong.”
Digdig: Van Palin, Baby!
Gopherit v2.0: I once worked with a woman who had permanent eye liner. That experience led me to believe the only people who tatoo on their makeup are the ones who are not helped at all by makeup. They can only be helped by a bag over their head.
magic titty: Well then how could she exploit this last milkable opportunity (at least for Track) as the world’s best & most sacrificing mother in the world who will also be able to take care of YOU & your petty needs?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Have you noticed in all of Palin’s pics her lipstick is ALWAYS the same color? Now how many women do you know that is true about? Proof. The end.
I really don’t know what to say. I mean, these pictures prove just how fucking stupid these people are. I mean, you can’t reason with them. You can’t use logic. “You can put lipstick on a community organizer”? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? I would say these mouth-breathing morons deserved their fate with a WALNUTS!/Palin ticket, but unfortunately that would mean I’d be leaving the country, which I’d prefer not to do.
saridout: Open wide for Chunky.
I might have to re-think the whole “Snow-Billy” thing….is that dude rockin’ the green Chuck’s?
Keram2: Why? Do you think Obama is falling behind in the polls among the urban poor? I’m thinking no…
I would not drill that. No way, no how.
magic titty: sexist.
NoWireHangers: It reminds me of Rudy 9-11’s hi-larious line from his convention speech:
“He was a ‘community organizer’… !(repeat 4x, making sure to pause for cheers & applause)”
superdave: It’s the only way to get the demons out.
StripesAndPlaids: That would be Marge Gunderson. Now all we need is a woodchipper.
The “Drill Here” folks should, for evermore be known as “Drill Twits.”
Pbbbt. Palin just blew America a giant, hockey mom sized raspberry. Take that, community organizers.
NoWireHangers: yes.
NoWireHangers:
Just split the US America into two nations.
One nation called US America which believes in liberty, science, reality blah blah blah
The other, filled with folks like this, called Dumbfuckistan.
NoWireHangers: nononononono–go to the governor of louisiana and let him perform an exorcism on you. he’s experienced ya know.
ManchuCandidate: Apparently Republicans are all in favor of premarital sex now. You just can’t use any form of contraception, and you have to get married if you get knocked up.
Kind of explains their love of young boys and restroom sex, when you think of it.
Jesus was a Community Organizer. Pontius Pilate was a Governor. D’Oh!
ManchuCandidate:
Correction: The UNITED PATRIOTIC
STATESTHEOCRACY of Dumbfuckistan.The dime just dropped in the jukebox. Can you imagine, with all the powers Bush has given to the Executive Branch, what further damage Caribou Barbie could do?
After looking at their stupid mugs this morning on tee vee, I would like to see Bush and Cheney tried and convicted of treason, and hung from a very high tree. Pay for View it and pay off the national debt.
And no President Hopey, you cannot give them a pardon.
Caribou Barbie apparently has cotton mouth.
StripesAndPlaids: Nope, not just you. Every time I hear SP, I look for Marge Gunderson in her parka on the teevee.
ManchuCandidate: Already done after the last presidental election
http://bigpicture.typepad.com/writing/2004/11/jesus_land.html
Lionel Hutz Esq.: So that’s it! Damn, I knew they had a reason since the hate on the homosexuals so much. You just have to be into buggery for the RIGHT reason.
Obviously that woman is a representative of Trepanners for McCain/Palin ‘08
Cogito Ergo Bibo: ftw!
My fiance pointed something out to me yesterday. Isn’t the whole lipstick colloquialism somewhat demeaning to women? Whether you’re referring to dangerous animals or congressional spending, let’s find a better metaphor. You can put lipstick on a woman, but she’s still a woman? You can tattoo lipliner on a Husky, but she’s still a snow-bitch. Metaphorical expressions (however simplistic yet droll) should avoid including feminine beauty products. I bet some lipstick company has been very unhappy about the whole incident.
Here’s a better idea…how about we ban hackneyed figures of speech until forever? Sorry Wal-Mart Moms…we’ll come up with a new healthcare plan to cover all your flash-fried neural synapses.
grendel: No, but generally people get pissed off when you mock Good Samaritans. I mean, they’re… good.
‘Drill Here’ helmets gets your messege across and doubles as protection aqainst people who want to whack you upside of the head for being a stupid fucking moron.
JadedDIssonance: I think Obama should switch to “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” when talking about McCain’s move to be the “Change” candidate… It brings up that McCain is OLD and that he’s been in Congress since the mid 1850’s and isn’t exactly a Washington outsider.
ManchuCandidate: Texturdisdummeraq… oh, hell, now I am giving the latin name for Bush: Texturdisdumm Iraqustoogumloqus. Too early for this. Need caffeine IV.
Keram2: No… generally GOOD people get pissed off when you mock Good Samaritans… Obama’s got the GOOD PEOPLE vote all locked up. Unfortunately that’s a minority compared to the bigoted, selfish, ignorant populace.
Doesn’t she have to spend two weeks being spiritually cleansed after being out in contact with Powdinwah?
Hum, yeah. The “Leezard of Oz”: pay no attention to the veep behind the curtains.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Got mine!
grendel: Except for my previously stated position on trite truisms, I would totally agree with you. My inner-Wendell Berry resonates with that.
(insert snow-dog mush joke here)
pondscum: Can you imagine letting some skeevy tattoo “artist” use an electric needle on your eyelids?
ManchuCandidate: Sarah Palin, President-for-Life of Dumbfuckistan. She’s just like us!
coastalelite: Trepanners for McCain/Palin ‘08 would be a GREAT photoshopped logo. Except nobody else would get it. Why does the best snark constantly confound?
ManchuCandidate: As you can see here, republicans are expressly against skull fucking.
http://www.theonion.com/content/video/live_from_congress_the_skull
grendel: Oh, you betcha.
Here’s the weird part for me… I don’t find this woman to be pretty. Certainly not sexy.
But then I don’t find Larry Craig sexy either.
Damn. This has been a long year.
Servo: Heavy use of Xanax and other anti-depressants will do that to you.
JadedDIssonance: It’s the inverse law of snarkiness… The number of people who get it is inversely proportional to the snark level.
Best pic from the rally:
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/09/11/palin-makes-her-first-appearance-in-fairbanks-alaska/
Of course this picture is awful. Shame on the press for snapping it just as she was reeling in a tasty fly with her tongue.
d34dfish: How’d they get lipstick on all those pigs? Talk about not getting the joke.
sanantonerose: That was either very poor recognition of the wiki link two posts earlier or snarkiness far beyond my pitiful powers of comprehension. Trepanation by any other name is just as sweet.
But did she ride in on a moose she then killed, cleaned, and grilled for all the drill hat wearing literati at the rally? I must know. Though that sign does make me regret voting for Obama, I mean his only accomplishment is community organizing. If only he spent some time in a legislative body.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
SayItWithWookies: Hey, don’t be such a hater . . . there’s probably 40 barrels of oil locked in that sawdust.
d34dfish: I am going to have nightmares about that for weeks…
Gopherit v2.0: You’d be surprised about ‘permanent make-up’. There is a place not far from my house (Tucson, AZ) that advertises it. They’ve been in business for several years now, I believe. But you are right, no woman in her right mind would do it, but no woman in her right mind would travel half-way across the country while leaking amniotic fluid, either.
d34dfish:
Kinda reminds me of “Little Shop of Horrors”.
Seriously. Are there ANY minorities in Alaska beside the indigenous people?
JadedDIssonance: well cheers to you for getting it!
Miller: I believe you mean “twiterati”
I’m not sure what’s worse: that the last photo made me think of trepanning, or that I was far from the only commenter here to think the same thing.
Do you think the fact that her mouth looks like lady parts is a subliminal way to try to attract the lesbian vote?
grendel: Bravo. Well played.
I’d love for someone to explain to me why women of all people are falling all over themselves for this twit. Men, ok, even w/the 70s hairdo, I can understand–some men will fall for anything female; Lenny Bruce once said given the right motivation, a guy would make it w/a chicken. I just don’t get the women. I personally have no friends who think she’s anything but window dressing for McCain and a bone to throw to the ladies for Hillary. Sigh. We are so much smarter than this.
Gopherit v2.0: “…you might do that if you’re selling a product …”.
Palin IS selling a product. She’s been selling it since she ran for Miss Wasilla Mooseburger.
A really good way to get people to look at your moran website is to make a protest sign with a message on it and then, in the bottom corner, print your URL in like 8-point font.
Words:
I honestly think the flock is greatly exaggerated by the media, who are provoking a deathmatch for ratings.
Because you all bring me such joy.
Curses: the link didn’t work and now I appear foolish. This was my gift to the world:
http://www.thejamesrocket.com/thejamesrocket_files/lizardqueen.gif
Words: SOME women
Time to revoke their statehood.
looks like she’s about to snare a fly with that tongue
No! you see what is taking place here, the shat sucking Liberal Media is so far up her ass she just climaxed, all this free publicity in killing me !
Sarah Palin’s Voice is becoming REALLY Annoying
http://megasizzle.com/annoying/sarah-palins-voice-is-becoming-really-annoying/
with funny pic too
looks like sideways labia
ManchuCandidate: She only looks like that ‘cuz the Caine gave her some sour milk.
magic titty: The Caine sent her son to Eye-rack. If he gets killed, she gets to be Viper-resident! Tough decision; be easy on her.
The Snowbilly is always photographed sticking out her Tongue.
Why do Alaskans hate America?
grendel: I’m not so sure she looks tired. I think she looks like she’s had a 2 week long meth withdrawl and had to high-tail it back to Alaska to get more homebaked goodness
i will happily take a drill bit to that loser’s head. sign me up for the Governments!
Look, having a VP who knows how to skin a moose might not be such a bad thing. If society collapses and we switch to subsistence living, her leadership in the area of field dressing game could be extremely beneficial. Not to mention a gal who can shoot a wolf from a moving helicopter! Of course it will have to be from horseback after there is no more gasoline, but still……….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygg2uWsKK6w
Hey People…
I found Sarah Palins real Nude Video at
http://sarahpalin-nude.blogspot.com
Advise this Nude Video…
“Mmmmmm…. The Presidency’s so close, I can almost TASTE it. I’ll serve it with some Moose stew and a nice bottle of Night Train….
SLURPSLURPSLURPSLURP SLURP!
HellO, Hillary…”
This is a little off topic maybe, but what the hell is up with her star-trek next generation space-suit outfits?
The drill here helmets are seriously weird - maybe they’re waiting for a HEADER (look up Ed Lee’s HEADER for more information) lol!
She looks like she’s going to take a sip from a slurpee after hitting the bong all night.