Wonkette
Here’s the stupidest piece of fucking bullshit the McCain campaign has released since, well, that last one that said Barack Obama molests 4-year-olds in the ass. It’s kind of funny, though, watching people across the Internet wail about how this ad IS NOT TRUTHFUL!!!1!, because what’s the point? Why even bother fact-checking a McCain ad? Each one is the precise audio-visual manifestation of Lie. And Barack Obama should expect this and BE MORE CAREFUL-ER, dingus.
Maybe in the future Barry should pick metaphors that don’t remind people of the most quoted line of late, except with the wonderful insertion of “pig.” It’s sloppy.
Oh and here’s another thing that absolutely doesn’t matter at all, ever, but why not: Sarah Palin is no longer an actual human. Some of you may have settled on this earlier, and GOOD FOR YOU. And yet, this ad! Maybe the editor with the vagina should be tackling this question, but can Sarah Palin claim to stand for even a trace, a fucking fume, of Feminism when she lets Steve Schmidt et al. put this ad — a piece of purely fictional gender-baiting — into the public sphere and doesn’t denounce it as 100% patronizing to women?
She is an actual slime monster from John McCain’s toilet. Gross.
Lipstick [YouTube]
Jim, you’re description of Palin could use a little work. It’s still too nice. Put yourself in the zone where you came up with the oft quoted Lieberman “two alien stools” line.
Ken Layne has a vagina???
Boom! Take THAT lipstick lovers! Obama responds brilliantly:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/26640762#26640762
the mccain camapaign is betting on women being as stupid as they are in… well… the minds of misogynists, I guess.
You can put lipstick on a bunch of crybabies, but that doesn’t make the feminists.
I think this is proof that John McCain is already senile. Seriously.
Sarah Palin Will Rape Your Duaghter
Meanwhile, Bush and McCain aren’t trying to do a thing about the $24 million severance package for those dipshit CEOs that ran Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac into the ground. How many family’s homes could be saved for $24 million?
It’s not really patronizing to women - but it is HIGHLY offensive to pigs.
No wonder Sarah Palin is so upset!!
SayItWithWookies: them. that doesn’t make them feminists.
Happy f*ck-up-your-one-liner Wednesday, moran.
Pitbulls look hot when they’re covered in lipstick.
Who volunteers to off the bitch….
Anyone? Anyone?
Can’t we just agree that she’s some sort of horrible pig-dog? is that so hard?
Ooh! Ooh! The best part is the McCain campaign’s response chastising Barry for blaming the media!
http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/09/10/obama-responds-to-phony-outrage/
Hilarious! Now the right wing are feminists? What the fuck color is the sun where these people dwell?
You stupid, STUPID assholes! Obama was calling McCain a pig. And Sarah smells like rotten fish. Gahh!
a famous hawaiian politician once said:
“Some of you may have — I’m assuming you guys have heard this, watching the news. I’m talking about John McCain’s economic politics, I say, “This is more of the same, you can put lipstick on a pig but it’s still a pig.”
And suddenly they say, “Oh, you must be talking about the governor of Alaska.”
[Laughter from audience]
See it would be funny, it would be funny except — of course the news media all decided that that was the lead story yesterday. They’d much rather have the story — this is the McCain campaign — would much rather have the story about phony and foolish diversions than about the future.
This happens every election cycle. Every four years. This is what we do. We’ve got an energy crisis. We have an education system that is not working for too many of our children and making us less competitive. We have an economy that is creating hardship for families all across America. We’ve got two wars going on, veterans coming home not being cared for — and this is what they want to talk about! this is what they want to spend two of the last 55 days talking about.
You know who ends up losing at the end of the day? It’s not the Democratic candidate, It’s not the republican candidate. It’s you, the American people. because then we go another year or another four years or another eight years without addressing the issues that matter to you. Enough.
I don’t care what they say about me, but I love this country too much to let them take over another election with lies and phony outrage and swift-boat politics. Enough is enough.”
You guys are totally not getting the meta-ironical joke here. The “Ready to Lead? No. Ready to Smear? Yes.” line refers to McCain-Palin. The ad is self-referential!
Huckabee calls Hannity out on it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXokM9TaxeA
This ad (and the whole fake controversy) has made me totally internet crazy today.
John McCain needs to go straight to the sicko ward now, so he can have a table.. and a chair, and talk to the walls about five and a half years. The man is clearly deranged and need of an intervention. He is scarier to me than Bush, and I never thought I would live to see the day I would think that let alone say it.
If people cannot see the difference between McCain and Obama, never mind the lipsticked pitbull… maybe the big bang experiment will go awry and blast us all out into outer space into nothingness where we belong.
What the holy fuck?
vomit
What’s with the Brian’s Song piano underneath Miss Piggy’s “zinger?”
Is Maybelline getting in on this? They definitely should. There’s an enormous market for White Women who buy lipstick. On the other hand, maybe Hormel should put out an ad: Free lipstick with a can of Spam.
If McCain respects Couric’s view so much as to quote her here, why the hell doesn’t he have HER interviewing either Palin or himself? Or is she too much of a cunt?
schnooten: “The BUCK stops here?” Seriously? A McCain spokesperson really said, with reference to Barry’s outrage, “The BUCK stops here”?!
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. This campaign season is giving me an ulcer.
At this point there should be a test to keep idiot fuckheads from voting.
That’s change we can believe in.
This whole thing is based on such a silly misunderstanding. Listen to the tape again.
He didn’t say, “Put lipstick on a pig.” He said, “Suck my fat one, you trollopy cunt.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjwVEeq7JiQ&feature=related
You can put lipstick on a trollop’s cunt, but it still smells like fish.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: The buck stopped there - but Palin shot it dead and is now gutting it.
Wow…. there’s no other word for that ad besides infantile. Are we sure that some group of high school republicans didn’t do this somewhere?
And the GOP playing the feminist card is high comedy indeed. It’s not like Obama said lipstick on a born-again, wackjob, bad-parenting-skills having, extremist twat (though I wish he had).
Sloppy?
I got a dub says this Pig Palin has sloppy panties.
Next ad, we’ll see lipstick on McCain’s talking ass and call it Barbara Bush.
Now I have heartburn, Jim. I hope you’re FUCKING happy. This election will be the death of me. I need some chocolate.
Johnny Zhivago: I just don’t know how many people it’s going to take to keep the entire campaign silent about the other side moving on to racial slurs. Seems like a cheap shot, to me. How could the McCain spokesman not know that “buck” is a (usually disparaging) term for a young black man? To ignore this, and keep on message, is absolutely what needs to be done, but good gravy.
Someone please hit me over the head, cause me to go into a coma and wake me up on November 5. I can’t take this bullshit anymore. Please, middle-Americans, don’t be as stupid and rightwing as I fear you may be.
…WoW, are the Republicans so dissatisfied with WALNUTS! that they are now portraying Palin as the top of the ticket? The McCain campaign has completely descended into the the sewers and must be dealt with in a swift and meticulous manner. Obama must bring out his ass whooping stick and go to work before this snowballs out of control. And I got a couple ideas of how to do it:
-Hillary must come out of the house with lead pipe and bad intentions
-If McCain wants to discuss sexism then lets talk about “C%nts” and “Trollops”
-Hey, did you guys know John McCain fukked around on his first wife while she recovering from a near fatal car crash?!
-John McCain doesn’t believe in equal pay for work when it comes to women
527 anyone?!
Does anybody know how much this “ad” was–or will be–actually broadcast on purchased airtime? Probably not much. It’s more like a video press release by the campaign that they hope gets shared among the Bitters. Which doesn’t make it any the less a piece of lying crap.
jasonelias: Campaign ad music comes in three flavors: (1) rising orchestral crescendos, when you’re saying something positive about your candidate; (2) dark minor chords, when discussing The Bad Thing; and (3) plinky piano music, when you need a little empathetic cry.
pinko-commie: The last time they said anything truthfully, they said this campaign wasn’t going to be about any fucking issues? Weren’t you listening?
AngryBlakGuy: We should start an Our Wonkette 527 and run some digustingly filthy offensively horrific ads about WALNUTS! and Lady Lens Crafters. An Our Wonkette 527 would make the Swift Boaters look like a Kenny G endorsement. We’d make the Daisy ad look like a love-in. Willie Horton would blush.
I used to think that amateurish, boorish, pandering ads would never work. This sort of think just seems too patronizing and obvious to have any effect.
But I’m pretty sure now that this will be the most effective ad of 2008. Please kill me.
jasonelias: There it is: she’s Miss Piggy from now on. Oh, Kermie!
AngryBlakGuy: Didn’t Hopey (or a “senior campaign spokesperson”) quietly unleash the previously leashed 527 money that’s dying to jump in? Thought I read it someplace or other.
NoWireHangers: I’m in!
Abraham Lincoln said, “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.”
Many years later, James Thurber added a codicil: “You can fool too many of the people, too much of the time.”
That, my friends, is American politics in general, and Walnuts/Caribou Barbie in particular. May God help us all.
NoWireHangers: That’s not a crazy idea. A Wonketteer-funded 527. This crowd could definitely put together an ad that would make Walnuts! dissolve in tears.
AngryBlakGuy: FUN FAKT:
Over 3/5 of all money spent on 527 is for dirty libruls, but the top 20 most effective 527s are, all but 2, for Republican lipstick-pitbulls.
NoWireHangers: Wonkette Commenters for Reality.
How do we start a 527?
AngryBlakGuy: I’d just go with “John McCain is the cancer killing America.”
sezme: OMG! She’s Man-Bear-Pig! Get Al Gore on the phone, stat!
madirishman: That was before IQ’s started dropping.
You can put lipstick on a pig, but you can’t put lipstick on the base of your wang and run around town showing it to everyone and telling them Sarah Palins mouth was there. But damned if I’m not gonna do it anyway!
23 Skidoo:
Republicans aren’t high-schooled. They’re home-schooled. It’s where they learn their values such as not telling a lie, and Brack and Michelle Obama are uppity.
4tehlulz: Does he look… tired to you?
Cogito Ergo Bibo, apocalypsethen: Wonderful response. I’m sure Obama wasn’t UNAWARE of the power that the word “lipstick” would have in the reference, but in context it is certainly about policy and not personal. Out of context, it becomes a jab. I think it was actually a brilliant remark, not a gaffe. My opinion is that it won’t convert any undecided voters…
4tehlulz: That ad writes itself.
Scene: Hospital room. Anxious tearful family surrounding a guy on life-support.
Script: Something about how McCain doesn’t have a plan to help hardworking families get life-insurance. Tough decisions that families have to make. Feed your children or pay for health insurance? End with a varient of what you said: John McCain - Part of the cancer killing America.
A twofer. Policy plus a swift kick in Grampy’s nuts.
Hey. Does John approve this message or what? Is he violating his own campaign advertising laws? What a huge cunty trollup loving douche bag.
ruh-roh. CBS just killed that ad. McCain hates copyright law too!
AngryBlakGuy: I totally agree 100%, but the sad sad fact is that YES, Americans are, I think the vast majority of them anyway, DUMB AS A FUCKING POST. And they eat this shit up, hook line and sinker. The bible banging, churchgoing, unhappy marriage having, sexually repressed, working as a wage slave, truck driving, suspicious minded kraft dinner eaters are all kinds o’ hard and wet over the old zombie and his milfy mosse burger eating twat companion.
And I’m telling you, if those two assholes win, life for freaks like us is going to get a LOT more lame. I’d say begin stockpiling now.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: I…I love you, and I want to have your e-babies.
AngryBlakGuy: The real reason for the 9/11 plane crashes? John McCain taught Mohammed Atta and his boys how to pilot a plane. Even without 5 and a half years!, they were better pilots than Walnuts.
I think Obama needs to take into consideration that in the future, no matter what he says, McCain is going to wrench it massively out of context/fabricate a lie, attack him with it, make an ad he’ll never run, and the media will spend all day talking about it.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
If people believe this false indignation (of the week), shouldn’t they have to worry about a President with such a thin fucking skin? Is Press Secretary Tucker Bounds going to hold impromptu press conferences to call Medvedev a racist/sexist/ageist/liberal?
Assholes.
everything mccain knows he learned in his cell in ‘nam. time for permanent r&r.
WadISay: i think you may be on to something about this not being an ad and being thrown out there to get in the news over the next couple of days! this is SOOOOOOOOOOOOO karl rove at work!
NoWireHangers: that’s an excellent idea to start our own 527!!! but be careful and don’t put out some stupid “general betray-us” backfire ad!
i was starting to feel all hopey again yesterday and now this! i heard some idiot on the bus this morning talking on her cell that she was changing from obama to mclame because obama disrespted miss piggy! EVEN THOUGH HE WAS REALLY TALKING ABOUT MCLAME’S POLICIES!!!! *sigh*
4tehlulz: Aww. Tweren’t nuthin.’ You came up with the tagline!
Cogito Ergo Bibo: See, I was thinking a little something different.
Scene: About the same, but instead of the crying family, you have a whispy, white-haired, 72-ish guy on a respirator surrounded by serious looking men in suits, a couple of doctors, and a plastic-looking woman with blonde hair. This fades to someone in judges’ robes holding a bible. A smarmy, white trash librarian type in a suit is standing next to the judge, one hand on the bible, one in the air. All of this with some sort of requiem playing in the background. Then, fade to in black; in the background, a mushroom cloud with the following written on the screen: John McCain: Will his cancer kill America?
Too “Little Girl with a Daisy”?
no seriously, how do we start a 527? we have to do something if hopey isn’t going to get dirty!!!
Gopherit v2.0: Not bad! I think borrowing from a classic is just fine. Who didn’t love “Little Girl with a Daisy”?
Cogito Ergo Bibo: that would be especially funny since the last “Little Girl with a Daisy” was used against another fucktard from arizona!
Cogito Ergo Bibo: schnooten: Nononono, not “buck.” The BUICK stops here. Cause it’s fuel inefficient and he can’t afford the gas. Hahahahahahahahaha.
Thank you. I’ll be here all night. Tip your waiters.
who was the first person to put lipstick on a pig, also why?
Special Agent Jack Mehoff: You go Jack!
Using the same tactic your enemies use (lying your ass off) may be the answer!
so why was it pulled?
sati demise: I know I’d love to hear McCain have to deny a chronic masturbation problem. If, of course, it isn’t true.
Is it just me or does anyone else think PitBitch is an escapee from the FLDS church ladies? Seriously, keep the hair, take off the Max Factor, give her a snowbilly prom dress and you got it.
Gopherit v2.0: Being the dickhead that he is, doesn’t McCain just stroke his neck a few times and cum out his nose? Ewww, I think I’m going to be sick.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: Thanks for linking that. We really haven’t been having enough hopegasms around here lately. I’d forgotten how soothing Barry’s voice is and how he’s actually sane and a human being, as oppposed to the stinky fish and lipsticked pig sideshow on the other side.
I like the way the audience still snickered when he repeated the pig in lipstick line though. Like, come on Barry, we all know you really meant for us to forever after associate Palin with a pig. Mission accomplished!!
you can still see the ad on mccains website, but it was stripped from youtube by CBS b/c of the katie couric part and b/c she was not talking about Palin.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: I feel like Obama did this whole thing on purpose. He’s too smart to have “foolishly” made a comment that could be so easily misconstrued. It was bait, and McCain bit and bit hard. He had this comeback ready before he even made that comment in the first place, bank on it.
That’s cunning we can believe in.
here’s some how-to info about your 527’s - have fun!
http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/501730.html