Wonkette
Both Cynthia Tucker, a columnist in Atlanta, and Jon Stewart, a political comedian on the teevee, have recently pointed out Bill O’Reilly’s peculiar (self-contradictory?) stances on famous teenagers getting knocked up. When Jamie Lynn Spears got pregnant, O’Reilly shouted at her parents for not “supervising” her adequately — good parents, as we all know, should hold their daughter’s hands when she’s getting banged by some local knucklehead. When Bristol Palin got pregnant, however, O’Reilly said that it was understandable and a private matter for the family. So Tucker and Stewart called O’Reilly out on this, and O’Reilly got super mad and defensive! He then sent some Fox lackey to stalk Tucker at her home and chided Stewart for “editing.” PROBLEM SOLVED. [YouTube]
Does he always sit so low at the desk? He looks like he’s in a high chair and needs some milk.
Was the Fox lackey O’Reilly sent brandishing a loofah?
He has no fucking idea who he is messing with.
If they were dogs, Cynthia Tucker would be Michael Vick pit bull and Oprah would be a rescue lab.
One of these days they’re going to pull this shit at the wrong person’s house and get dealt with. I cannot wait.
He should change the title from “Back of the Book” to “Glossarytarded.”
How come o’lielly hasn’t stalked Jon Stewart yet, that would be funny to see.
O’Reilly got super mad and defensive? No way!!!!!111!!!! Not Teh Billo, he never gets crazy. I just don’t understand. Maybe last years war on christmas left him emotionally weak?
if you watch that show and pretend it’s just a parodic news show ala colbert, it’s actually pretty funny.
Otherwise, it gives me an aneurysm just to think about it. At least lefty-biased media has a sense of humor and makes a point of being lefty, if FOX just changed their tagline to “We’re always right!” it would be somehow more tolerable than seeing that joke “Fair and Balanced” spinning around all day.
…why do Democrats legitimize the anal cyst by going on his show(I’m talking to you Barack Obama)? He goes around doing ambush interviews as a way to to get back at people who cross him. And lets not even touch all the out and out lies that he perpetuates on a daily basis on his cable/radio show. However when Chris Matthews and Keith Olberman express accurate and factually based opinions they are effectively silenced.
Man, even Dr. Laura has the balls to be consistent and attack her daughter. O’Reilly is actually lower than her.
tonashideska: Well, ever since Bill went to lunch in Harlem and saw “the colored folk” actually using knifes and forks, drinking iced tea and not shouting “MOTHER FUCKER”, he’s not so afraid.
Do I see a popped collar on the interviewer who is blatantly attempting to goad Cynthia Tucker? Or is it that I’m mentally creating a collar poppage where none exists to conform the image to the generic FOX staffer image that I hold in my mind?
blader:
Agreed. Cynthia Tucker should not be fucked with.
i’ve never seen his show. [pats self on back]
[has another beer]
As a member of a far-left smear site, or BLOG, I detest myself.
Was that pithy?
My dear Wonkette, please do not make me watch any more luffinating! I think he said “fucker” instead of “tucker”…and Tweety and O’ are too partisan?
Bill O’Reilly is a fag.
So the difference, according to Crazy Bill, is that the Spears kids are unsupervised, but the Palin kids are? In that case, I presume that Caribou Barbie witnessed the blessed moment of conception? The hell? They’re a bit more freaky up in Alaska than I’d been lead to believe.
Oh, and Billy Boy? You’re a pussy to send a lackey to that nice lady’s home. If you had any testicular fortitude you’d confront her yourself. Pussy.
I would absolutely love to fist-fight O’Reilly.
GlennBecksTaint: I still wouldn’t do him.
Is O’Reilly suggesting that Sarah Palin was looking on as Bristol was boinking her hockey player boyfriend.
On the plus side, now that O’Reilly’s crew is stalking Cynthia Tucker at her home, this frees her up to bill the Atlanta Journal Constitution for like, 3 years of per diem at $705 / day.
AngryBlakGuy: hey — that was uncalled for!!! how dare you insult anal cysts!!! what did anal cysts ever do to you to merit being compared to bill o’reilly??? ok — nevermind i really don’t want to know…
so, Palin supervised her kids doin it!
hot.
I grow increasingly weary of the personal invective that has pervaded what passes for political discourse in this country.
That being said, Bill O’Reilly is a big poopy head.
how many more TUCKERs are we going to have to meet????
Tucker Bounds is still my fave. I love Klowns!
MoodProcessor: i would absolutely love to fist fuck O’Reilly!
tonashideska: Because even though Jon is 5′2″ and asthmatic, he could still kick that effete screamer’s ass.
MoodProcessor: Totally. I know.
whatever_dc: Meh. Not so much.
whatever_dc: He’d love it too. Seriously, you know he’s got his dark side too.
whatever_dc:
Try and catch a thumb-nail on the anal cysts. And for Chrissakes, wash your hands.
We need internment camps for people named “Tucker”… Let’s get Michelle Malkin on this now!
Grimnir: I think you did! O’Reilly must be hard up. It just makes sense to wait until Repubtards have gotten laid at least once before you put them in front of the camera. The stench from that guy’s compulsive wanking was coming through my computer.
“Eight out of context edits, Jooon. Way to gooo. Unbeliveable.”
Translated: You just sodomized me, John. Call me.
hahah!! he really GAVE it to the Macfarland guy! Wow! His GRANDKIDS will feel that ass whooping!
Everyone knows you don’t hold your teenage daughter’s hand while she’s getting banged by some knucklehead. That’s ridiculous. You should be holding the video camera.
AngryBlakGuy: Yes. it is like Democrats have a problem understanding winning. You don’t win by embracing your opponent’s nonsense. You win by eviscerating them, or watching them self-implode.
The press conference Barry gave this morning should have been more attack dog, less lap.
I love that his comment about teen pregnancy is that it is okay as long as society doesn’t have to pick up the tab while talking about the Palins. Yes, as long as you’re a rich irresponsible parent that will pay for your kid’s actions, I don’t care. But the poors need to keep better tabs on their kids. Even if they are working two jobs because they’re losing their house.
Oh, and if you get raped, you need to pay for your rape kit. I mean, why should the burden be put on me, the taxpayer?
This election needs to end soon, because I’m going insane.
cotr: That’s what I was about to say. As long as parents watch their kids having sex, then Billo’s cool with it.
I bet he is.
uh huh
yeah, there is no evidence at all that Bristol was not supervised!!! Mom and First Dude were right there, showing the kids exactly how it’s done …
someday the contradictions in his mind will cause his brain to explode, we only hope it is soon
Oh, my gosh, this O’Reilly guy is hilarious! Man, his satire is better than the Daily Show or the Colbert Report!–oh, shit, wait, that videotaped segment was sincere and devoid of satire? Wow. What a dumbass.
But really, folks… O’Reilly’s almost parodying himself now, isn’t he? What a shithead.
grendel: Yeah, it seems that like 3/5 of Republican operatives are named Tucker these days. I don’t think Cynthia Tucker counts since it’s her last name…and she’s not a Republican operative…but what is it with kids named Tucker growing up to be douches?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I refuse to watch the clip again, but did that field reporter* imply that it’s wrong for the Spears girl because it was an accident but Bristol might have planned this? Everyone knows 17 make the best decisions!
*I guess that’s what he’d be called, even though he sounded like a really bored intern.
That God Bill O’Reilly is still around for us to make fun of, in our loserness.
This could all be solved if Bill O’Reilly would just accept my longstanding challenge to an ultimate fight.
NotLaughing: Go have a falafel, Bill.
I Papa Bear is preparing himself for a democratic presidency with those liberal friendly talking points at the end. Soon he’ll start discussing how he’s always supported same-sex marriage.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
floraway: The really funny part is he said Palin’s pregnancy is okay since society doesn’t have to pay for it, but I think we are far more likely to be giving welfare to Bristol once she fades back into obscurity than we are Jamie Lynn who has her Nick show fortune to sustain her for awhile. And sadly, Jamie Lynn seems a bit brighter than any of the Palins.
Cogito Ergo Bibo: If Bill-O was a decent human being he would realize that teen pregnancy can happen to nearly any family regardless of how well the kids are supervised. Of course Palin could be criticized for not monitoring her kids 24/7 and putting a sufficient fear of God and eternal consequences in them to prevent the premarital sex. That would at least keep them virgins till they left home to attend five colleges or join the military.
I love how he plays the Stewart clip that quite accurately shows Bill-O’s hypocrisy: it must be his way of psychologically reliving his childhood when he would mess up at home as a kid and his right-wing Irish dad would make him admit to what he did then beat the shit out of him.
Jesus Christ
oh, come on bill. we all know you’re just jealous of cynthia’s pulitzer. that inside edition polk award’s not doing it for you these days, eh?
Huh, and Bill doesn’t seem to address the hypocrisy at all, just the Atlantic Journal-Constitution’s circulation. I’m shocked that he has no valid comeback.
I’m trying to remember why it was wrong for people to show up at O’Reilly’s house and interview him about his sexual improprieties, but OK for him to do it to folks he disagrees with on a variety of topics. If I had words with him publicly, the first thing I’d do is string a series of Loufas together and hang them in my window. Then I’d order a big platter of falafel and keep it on hand to offer to his minions. But I’m sure John will have a better rebuttal than that.
Jon, not John
NotLaughing: You’re surprisingly low on snark today. Someone needs a bong toke.
Viva la Cynthia:
Well, they ARE named “Tucker”.
Bill O’Reilly of course would know a thing or two about ZERO credibility. As for the Spears Girls, Brit Brit is of age and can do as she pleases and I never saw Jamie Lynn running around.
KevoTron:
Really? Like who?
She did it just to be mean spirited? Oh, NOES!1!!
We know that you’re never mean-spirited, Papa Bear.
Like how you’ve never told anyone to “shut up”, ever!
Well, I’m not mean spirited, I just tell it like it is.
You piece of shit.
Gopherit v2.0:
Falafel this.
Signed,
Something about Hummussing
kellygrrrl: Sorry but there is another Tucker Clown by the name of Tucker Carlsen. Between him and Tucker Bounds I don’t whick is the bigger CUNT!!
Cynthia Tucker is a SHERO though! Totally hot bitch!
NotLaughing: Thank you for making me appreciate my former paultard foes.
I don’t own a television, in part so I don’t have to be exposed to O’Reilly’s kind of sophistry and vapid rhetoric.
Thanks a lot, Wonkette! You’ve poisoned my brain for the next 1000 years.
Gopherit v2.0:
That’s what I’m hereford!
NotLaughing: You are hilarious!!!!!1!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I want my sister’s posts to post right now!!
tonashideska: He wouldn’t stalk Stuart because he’d kick his ass. He don’t look so big but I think he’d fight dirty
I call hate crime.
Search O’Reilly’s trunk for kerosene soaked crosses.
Wonkette, Wonkette… how could you miss the best part??
Here’s a hint. One minute in.
Still don’t get it?
Graphictruth: Gleaner, Wonkette and even maybe even John Stewart miss “Pappa Bear’s” Best Line.
I know, it WAS a target-rich environment…
Wait, that was from a real TV show? HA HA HA HA HA
Papa Bear has hurt feelings, poor Papa Bear
Bill O called her “one of the most intellectually dishonest journalists” in the country.
HA! If that ain’t the loofah callin’ the falafel a liar.
What’s up his ass? Oh.
Wow, how did O’Reilly get Tobey Maguire to badger his enemies? I mean, sure, a lot of people were disappointed in Spider-Man 3, but still…
John Stewart is a short guy but he’ll bitch-slap 6′4″ Billo’s wandering eye right back into alignment.
AJC’s rational response. They sent their conservative commentator to the GOP shindig, and Tucker hung with the Dems.
http://www.ajc.com/blogs/content/shared-blogs/ajc/bookman/entries/2008/09/06/on_this_peaceful_pleasant_atla.html
Oh. Bristol isn’t necessarily unsupervised. We were totally supervising her getting knocked up. Levi will be a good daddy. Ya.
Let me get this straight: a journalist and a comedian attempt to call him on hypocrisy, and his response is to stalk and harass the former and utter six sarcastic words about the latter. And yet he never answered the charges. Out of context how, Bill? Why not take this opportunity to clear this all up for your eager listeners? Allah knows they’re going to need a heck of a lot of help to explain how this isn’t hypocrisy to the swing voters.
I think they’ve given up on the swing voters. They have The Base and Diebold, after all.
Sweet Jesus I Hate that sanctimonious self important piece of FOX shit.
Next to Hamitty, Bill Oreilley is the lowest…
Oh wait.
Hamitty doesn’t claim to be “Fair and Balanced.”
That makes Sean ‘I buttfuck Colmes every day’ Hamitty the more honest piece of shit on FOX ‘news’ every night. Or maybe that should be the ‘less dishonest’ piece of shit.
Once again, just like the at the Pulitzers, Bill O’Loofah comes in a distant second place.
No evidence that the Palin kids were unsupervised… so she and/or Todd WATCHED while the teens engaged in pre-nuptial coitus.
Well, I guess Palin not only brings in the Hard-core Christian wackos, she also brings in the pedophile voyerists!
Gotta love that BIG TENT that the repubs have!!!
Oh my god. I already kind of wanted to fuck Jon Stewart, but now that he has Bill in such a spittle-flying, sneering, snit, I really want to do him.
SuperRounder: Amen and amen!
So I am watching the “Bill” on you tube, who is showing a video of Jon Stewart, who is showing a video of Bill’s show. I think I just did a super collider of the internets. This shit is getting hard to follow.
JackMormon: It gets better: Colbert is going to analyze this, and then Jon is going to talk about the Colbert Report. It ends with Jon talking about the O’Reilly followup.
Bill O’Reilly got his start many moons ago at WNEP-TV, Channel 16, in Scranton, PA. He was a blowhard back then, and he’s still a blowhard. Check this out:
http://nachofoto.com/photo-of-bill-oreilly-wnep-E4f31ac9df353
Does no one at FOX realize what a train-wreck this guy is?