Wonkette
- THAT’S ALL, MY FRIENDS: The balloon sausages shall drop from the ceiling, and then it will take five-and-a-half years to get out of here because of the total failure of security.
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You might as well just pitch a tent, Ken. They have to let the wheelchairs and walkers out first.
I used to like to karoake to that Heart song. I guess I won’t be doing that anymore.
Oh, and the speech blew.
kind of a depressing week.
On his way out, McCain kisses every middle-aged blond woman in the audience. And Cindy follows behind with an icy stare for each one.
But at the end of the five-and-a-half years you too will be qualified to be president!
Kool and the Gang? Wow, it IS the eighties!
Just fuckin’ punch your way out, big guy!
Cindy — please — don’t try to dance.
I have just started to watch it now, and will get back to you heathens shortly. Five and a half years.
…Andrea Mitchell is drowning in balloons LMAO!!!!
Andrea Mitchell should get a raise. She’s being buried in balloons.
…am I the only watching Andrea Mitchell?!?!?!
ahhahahah. Oh sweet lord. Andrea Mitchell. Covered in balloons.
Oh my God…Please, cameraman put down the camera and throw Andrea Mitchell a frickin’ life raft- she’s drowning!!!
These are all songs that Reagan enjoyed when he was workin’ it…
Why do we hear all those balloons popping? There must be an awful lot of little pricks in that stadium.
Andrea Mitchell has been killed by a massive amount of balloons. Poor Andrea.
OffTheRecord: Maurice Levy: …I would totally pinch Andrea Mitchell’s ass in the mayhem!
Wait — he walked through the whole stadium and now he’s back on stage, where he started? He’s going in circles! It’s the McCain Witch Project. (flashlight to face) I’m sorry everybody. I dragged us out here to this godforsaken arena and now we’re trapped and going to die here. It’s all my fault — I thought this was the eighties! (sob).
Andrea say: I covered Reagan. I covered lots of other stuff. I never seen a balloon drop like this. I think Republicans will win…. the balloon war.
Start yelling “Code Pink” and they’ll rush you out of there pronto.
I will vote McCain when he tattoos SARAH on his finger.
legglaw: The Republican party is in the pocket of BIG BALLOON.
Ken Layne:
You guys should just put on pink shirts and voice unpopular opinions. You’ll be courteously escorted out of there in no time.
“The balloon sausages shall drop from the ceiling, and then it will take five-and-a-half years to get out of here because of the total failure of security.”
But we need to protect our security, guys! Walnuts said so!
Wonkette Staff Members deserve combat pay! Assuming they get paid at all. Take the next week off.
Good job.
“Boom Boom Andrea Mitchell”? Seriously, Brokaw? Kinda weird…
The balloon drop terror alert is bright red.
Wolf B. is discussing the “First Douche” Todd Federline…
SayItWithWookies: NICE.
In other news, I’m afraid I have developed a full-fledged crush on Keith Olbermann. Why is this?
Huckleberry Hound is on The Daily Show, again being the most gracious and classy person in St. Paul.
Gov. Ridge say: John Bush do this, do that….blah,blah,blah.
Calling Dr. Freud.
Oh shit — he asked God to still the storms on the east coast. I’m buying a boat.
So ends a shitacular Convention. Now it’s time for you to decide, America!
Well, that speech was so boring I didn’t even get mad.
“I move we say Fuck Baby Jesus, let’s get ripped!”
travel safe wonkette! we will miss you til you can be our friend in wonkette world again!
Hahahahaha:
Jon Stewart to Huckabee: “So you feel that your party is the only party to undo the damage that your party has done?”
AnnieGetYourFun: Um, cuz he’s awesome? You’re not the only one pining after that guy, trust me.
did anybody watch O’Reilly and Obama?
Guy on CNN says: there’s lots of little pieces of John McCain (balloons?) all over the place.
Hey all - Hopey lays the smack down on O’Reilly on his own show! *snicker*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNAbmt88OHo
chascates: They’re called biopsies.
hockeymom: …nope but it is on the Huffington post.
At CNN/Larry King site:
Will you vote for John McCain?
Yes 19% 1124
No 81% 4828
Total Votes: 5952
Wow. That speech wasn’t terrible, but the delivery sure was. And USA USA USA! every 4 seconds is, well, fucking creepy.
Off topic, I’ve been really busy and missing a lot of Wonkette action recently. So…WTF is up with the WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING WEBSITE being an ad???
I’ve had a lot to drink tonight (coping mechanism, of course), but wow it is awful. And this is coming from someone who loved Choke, at least as a book…
KittyKatMan: Awesome. At this point it’s hard to tell who’s worse for the McCain/Palin ticket — McCain or Palin.
That speech was anti-climatic, short lived, pathetic, impotent, flaccid, pale, sad, weak, desolate, forlorn, lonely, pandering, withdrawn, manic, by the book, plastic, and TOTALLY AWESOME.
You can thank my birthday for this speech.
Ann and Nancy Wilson are pissed at the Republican Party and have fired off a cease and desist letter to the McCain/Palin campaign. I love America. http://www.tmz.com/2008/09/04/republicans-lack-heart/
ms_mcgee: * For using the song “Barracuda”
If the Republican Party is done with it now, can I please borrow that jumbotron for the football season?
I think he had a good beat and he was easy to dance to.
ms_mcgee: A string quartet playing “Nearer my God to Thee” on the fantails would have been more appropriate…
ms_mcgee: Wow. Check out the comments on that story you linked to. I think I’ll just hang out at Wonkette from now on. The people here are just so much _nicer_.
“I’m afraid I have developed a full-fledged crush on Keith Olbermann. Why is this?” He had me at ESPN. A Baptist, ad man, friend of mine in Manhattan started ragging on my Keith, saying, “He’s such a hater!” So I proceded to tell him how completely SEXY Mr.O is, and now my friend is scratching his head bewildered. Men have no clue.
HairyIckey: What? oh. I had’t noticed.
wow. the few correspondents left in the Xcel center are playing with frightening Walnuts confetti and puppets. And a Utah delegate just did a really really funny impression of Snowbilly.
John McCain’s copyrights were violated for five-and-a-half years!
d4g33z: Agreed. We can only hope (and expect) that those people won’t vote. Ignorant bastards.
Because of Hanna, Skeletor has made the entire US a no-fly zone except for direct flights to Gitmo. Can’t wait to read your on-line blogs from your May-be-as Corpus torture prison hearings. Will Liz do the final videos? Kisses.
37 million viewers for Palin’s speech, according to Fox.
d4g33z: Absolutely! That is one nasty bunch of blockheads.
Just imagine, if WALNUTS! and Ms Moosefart take the Whitehouse teh Internets will will be infested with buffoons.
Black Eagle - Save us!
Obama/Biden ‘08.
I heard from a “reliable” source that the audience was instructed ahead of time to start chanting “USA USA” every time someone protested or was tasered/beaten/shot, etc. Dang, that was a lot of “USA USA” going on.
Y’all got to check this out: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ucru/20080904/cm_ucru/sarahpalinqueenofthenobodies