OUR ALIEN OVERLORDS  12:34 am September 4, 2008

McCain-Palin Actually Robot-Hating Space Monsters?

by Ken Layne

Vote 4 Space Monsters!Something sort of familiar about scary old McCain and shrill Mrs. President Palin? Yes, they are the space monsters from teevee’s Battlestar Galactica — the doomed leaders of a spaceship filled with frantic losers running for their lives from the PLANET THEY DESTROYED … we think. We have not actually watched this show, but we vaguely recall the terrible original version from 1942. You people, in the comments, will very quickly display an encyclopedic knowledge of the show, and how it proves McCain-Palin will destroy our planet, too. [Tigh-Roslin 2008 via Cryptogon]

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Hola wonkerados.

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rhet_orical September 4, 2008 at 12:42 am

We’re fracked!

PeteJayhawk v2.0 September 4, 2008 at 12:42 am

Hey Layne – if your comment software didn’t suck more than Mitt Romney’s speech, life would be good.

Seriously, Ken. Fuck you.

ms_mcgee September 4, 2008 at 12:43 am

Drill, drill, drill! Desks for everyone!

SayItWithWookies September 4, 2008 at 12:47 am

No encyclopedic knowledge of Battlestar Galactica. But I get the impression that Palin could make an actual space monster’s balls retract.

Canmon (the Inadequate) September 4, 2008 at 12:48 am


tiny mexican September 4, 2008 at 12:50 am

That makes sense. Ellen Tigh = Cindy McCain? They’re both trollopy substance-abusing cunts.

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 12:51 am

It’s simple:
John McCain = Tigh
Sarah Palin = Rosalin
Future Combat Systems = Cyclons
Todd Palin = Bill Adama
Track Palin = Lee Adama
George Bush = George Bush

SayItWithWookies September 4, 2008 at 12:52 am

[re=83632]PeteJayhawk v2.0[/re]: You did notice that the Palin thread had 32,000 pageviews, right? It’s like it just gave birth to a baby with Karl Rove’s head. It’s in a little bit of pain right now.
Also it’s Ramadan, and terrorist servers fast during daylight hours, so they’re operating a little slow.

Tito Puente September 4, 2008 at 12:53 am

“Gods dammit, cut back or you won’t have any energy at all! The Cylons will have it all!” Enough said.

It’s about fracking time someone brought up that point.

CivicHoliday September 4, 2008 at 12:55 am

We must defeat them. So say we all.

WagTehGod September 4, 2008 at 12:56 am

Palin is the hawt female Cylon. Which one? Who cares, they’re all knockout robot chicks and they can make robot babies with me any day.

Ken Layne September 4, 2008 at 12:57 am

[re=83632]PeteJayhawk v2.0[/re]: You know, I think it’s time for you to leave.

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:00 am

This is like the after-after party. Usually, a fight breaks out.

Godot September 4, 2008 at 1:05 am

[re=83645]d4g33z[/re]: John Edwards = Tom Zarek

AngryBlakGuy September 4, 2008 at 1:08 am

…no one told me that Fred Thompson was in “Ghost Busters”?!


knoxtheharpy September 4, 2008 at 1:11 am

I don’t watch this Battlestar Galactica thing you kids are talking about, but you should see the picture on the main page at MSNBC. It’s Sarah holding Trig and he looks like a little helpless manatee. Retarded baby FTW!

sweetits September 4, 2008 at 1:12 am

I just got out of a hot shower. I still can feel the republician on me. Dirty.

Scarab September 4, 2008 at 1:13 am

I wish I could follow all the Battlestar Galactica references, but I’ve actually been laid.

Oh hell to the no September 4, 2008 at 1:14 am

I just hope that when Palin finally gets the fuck out of my state she doesn’t forget to take *all* of her kids – that includes Levi. He’s the newest one with special needs, who appeared 4 month ago, right?

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:16 am

[re=83660]Godot[/re]: Yes!
Bristol Palin = Cally Tyrol
But who is brilliant enough to be Gaius Baltar?

Gopherit v2.0 September 4, 2008 at 1:16 am
d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:18 am

[re=83664]Scarab[/re]: Actually?
Levi = Sam Anders

Scarab September 4, 2008 at 1:21 am

[re=83671]d4g33z[/re]: Yup, she was dressed up as a Klingon at Comic-Con… at least I’m pretty sure it was a she.

Sir Gaywad Baggington-Douchely von Suck September 4, 2008 at 1:26 am

Good catch! But if you want “separated-at-birth” resemblances AND conceptual equivalency, you can’t really go wrong with this show.

I mean, the looks, the hair, the accent … the fact that she’s walking around with a white guy’s hand stuck up her ass. I don’t know how much more obvious you can get!

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:26 am

[re=83672]Scarab[/re]: Nice.

sanantonerose September 4, 2008 at 1:30 am

Don’t forget Mary McDonnell was also in Donnie Darko and Dances with Wolves. Just sayin’.

dhcmrlchtdj September 4, 2008 at 1:30 am

Um, isn’t your new site-wide ad a little NSFW?

you cannot be serious September 4, 2008 at 1:31 am

I don’t know of this Battlstar. But I want to express my love for you, Wonkette. You make the night of 1000 Ulus a bit more bearable.

sanantonerose September 4, 2008 at 1:33 am

[re=83668]d4g33z[/re]: Brilliant AND devious AND psychotic?

Hmmmmm…..I got nothin.

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:35 am

[re=83681]sanantonerose[/re]: I know. And the funny’s been all beat out of it now. Terrible.

Jingo September 4, 2008 at 1:41 am

McCain and Palin are futuristic heroes from outer space. After 5 1/2 years in a Cylon Prison Pod, McCain is getting his revenge by burning up all the oil the Cylons need to lubricate their robot joints. As winner of the Beta Epsilon-5 beauty pageant, Sarah got to travel through time to meet Jesus who is an seven tentacled, silicon-based life form. Jesus sent her to modern-day Earth to get more humans to pray to him. If McCain and Palin fail, they will be sent to the nearest black hole and subsequently ripped asunder. So… Go Obama/Biden!

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 1:46 am

Jesus = Gaius Baltar

njdon September 4, 2008 at 1:53 am

no one should get too sensitive here. its late and bar fights are ugly. every horny guy wants to take home the last gal who happens to be slutty sarah.

dan106 September 4, 2008 at 1:55 am

hank you Wonkette for confirming what I’ve known for months–John McCain is not one of us, he is a stealth Cylon operative! Cindy McCain even looks like Col. Tigh’s ill-fated wife. The question remains–who best represents Mittens and Rudy and Dr. Ron Paul in this exciting analogy?

dan106 September 4, 2008 at 1:56 am

hank you Wonkette for confirming what I’ve known for months–John McCain is not one of us, he is a stealth Cylon operative! Cindy McCain even looks like Col. Tigh’s ill-fated wife. The question remains–who represents Mittens and Rudy and Dr. Ron Paul in this exciting analogy?

sanantonerose September 4, 2008 at 2:00 am

[re=83696]d4g33z[/re]: Jesus? Oh come now.

Cryptoxanthus September 4, 2008 at 2:03 am

You know, the BSG comparison works. Somehow though, Palin reminds me of The Positively True Adventures of the Alleged Texas Cheerleader-Murdering Mom as played by Holly Hunter. And Cindy McCain is totally like Swoosie Kurtz’s character.

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 2:09 am

[re=83707]sanantonerose[/re]: Well, Baltar is something of a lynchpin to the whole narrative!

And your macbook snapped cheekbone/hair/eyeglass frame/green eye could make me chat endlessly about it…boy, it is late isn’t?

automaton September 4, 2008 at 2:18 am

Actually, I know it won’t be popular here, but if we’re caricaturing, is there any doubt who the the all-show no-substance flip-flop pretty-boy cult leader opponent of Roslin is?

Barack Obama = Gaius Baltar

d4g33z September 4, 2008 at 2:24 am

[re=83726]automaton[/re]: I’ll go with that. Close enough to Jesus.

And with that…toodle loo.

spraklepeapooh September 4, 2008 at 2:32 am

I think Barack is hotter than Gaius.

And now I need to add the show to my Netflix queue so I can rewatch it.

Bigbruther September 4, 2008 at 2:34 am

@ Cryptoxanthus: Cindy McNazi is more like Colonel Kurtz. The horror! The horror!!

If Sarah was a cylon, that means there would be, like, millions of her. We need to destroy the resurrection ship.

Michael Palin for President!

freppish September 4, 2008 at 3:16 am

i find this disturbing, i dont know if i can ever not think of this while watching BSG again

regisgoat September 4, 2008 at 5:19 am

The Residents were right, ignorance of my culture is not cool. Seeing this photo makes me feel like a right chump for not having seen BSG, despite all the recommendations it gets–

druranium September 4, 2008 at 6:57 am

I have heard a lot about this from the geeks, dweebs, & nerds. I’m just a commonplace lackey.

Servo September 4, 2008 at 7:04 am

Michelle can be our Starbuck and beat the shit out of Colonel McCorpse.

Terry September 4, 2008 at 7:25 am


Gais Baltar spends most of this time doing the wild thing with a woman who only exists in his own mind.

I really don’t want to know who in the RNC freak show best fits that characteristic. Really.

ProgHead777 September 4, 2008 at 8:56 am

I don’t think I get the Palin to Roslin comparison. McCain = Tigh, ok, I can buy that. But Laura Roslin only turned fascist against her own convictions. Clearly she’s Joe Lieberman.

Brian Mac September 4, 2008 at 9:17 am

I found it! I found it! Here’s the prototype the McCain camp used:


BruceLee5000 September 4, 2008 at 10:05 am

[re=83851]Brian Mac[/re]: OMG! She is SO Peggy Hill!
The ignorant self-assurance even when completely wrong— ESPECIALLY when completely wrong.
The insistence that her (relatively) small achievements qualify her for sophisticated positions of power…
The husband with a narrow urethra. The giant feet.

Well, probably…

bearbait September 4, 2008 at 11:27 am

[re=83681]sanantonerose[/re]: Karl Rove?

Miller September 4, 2008 at 1:21 pm

Yes. Wait is this a trick question?

Yes. Air lock the frakkers.


cambler September 4, 2008 at 8:34 pm

Glad you liked the site (Yeah, I’m the geek whackjob behind TighRoslin.com)! ;)

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