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MOPEY JOE

Coming Soon: Bill Clinton, Live From Denver!

Haw Haw
Your editors are ready to kick back with Obama and whatever white family he visits tonight, as we all enjoy Bill Frickin’ Clinton! Liveblogging and live reporting from the Democratic National Convention in beautiful downtown Denver, coming soon! (Thanks to Wonkette Operative Michael Gambale for the screenshot.)


7:53 PM on Wed August 27 2008
By Ken Layne
884 Views

  1. SayItWithWookies says at 7:57 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I can’t believe Jay Rockefeller isn’t a Republican — his oratory is a violation of the Geneva Conventions. Oh lordy, it’s over. I was just about to confess to orchestrating 9/11.

  2. NoWireHangers says at 7:57 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Yeah, the NYT picked one HELL of a picture to accompany it’s Acclamation/Nomination story…

  3. NoWireHangers says at 7:57 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I believe that expression is called “The Spitzer”

  4. Destonio says at 7:58 pm, August 27th, 2008
  5. chaseychasem says at 8:00 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Bill totally looks like he already misses hitting IKEA with Hillz in January.

  6. SayItWithWookies says at 8:01 pm, August 27th, 2008

    And the award for most hackneyed medley goes to…

  7. WhatTheHeck says at 8:02 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I’m still at work. Whaa just happened?
    Did Barry just get voted off the island?
    Oh, I can hardly wait for Bill’s acceptance speech.

  8. obfuscator says at 8:02 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I bet Barry gets bored and asks if anyone wants to watch ESPN or Iron Chef.*

    *secret ingredient: ARUGULA

  9. AnnieGetYourFun says at 8:05 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I’ve actually been looking forward to the day that Bill’s rage would cause him to eat his own face. Took longer than I thought.

  10. itgetter says at 8:05 pm, August 27th, 2008

    This post only makes me wish Hopey would visit my white family. We have a flat screen too Barry! Share the love!

  11. chaseychasem says at 8:07 pm, August 27th, 2008

    jesus, has EVERYBODY in America gained weight?

  12. itgetter says at 8:07 pm, August 27th, 2008

    There is so much win among these comments. I cannot choose which one to quote.

  13. AnnieGetYourFun says at 8:07 pm, August 27th, 2008

    chaseychasem: No, it’s actually just your retinas that got fat. We’re all as svelte as ever.

  14. masterdebater says at 8:08 pm, August 27th, 2008

    ” as we all enjoy Bill Frickin’ Clinton!”
    Bubba eruption?

  15. Sharif DelMonte says at 8:10 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Senator Knuckles is praising Jimmy Carter and bashing Bush! Awesome!

  16. hrhkingfriday says at 8:10 pm, August 27th, 2008

    diggtards, noooooooooo!

  17. chaseychasem says at 8:12 pm, August 27th, 2008

    “Even if we manage to ween ourselves off of furrin oil, we must find other excuses to continue as an interventionist, nineteenth-century imperialist power!”

  18. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 8:12 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Hey, since the Wonkette gang is at the arena, any truth to the rumor that Bill is planning to walk out surrounded by bikini clad women, smoking a blunt, while Public Enemy’s “Fight the Power” pounds over the sound system?

    WhatTheHeck: No, Hillary was.

  19. chaseychasem says at 8:13 pm, August 27th, 2008

    “wean,” I mean. DAM U REID!

  20. smellyal8r says at 8:14 pm, August 27th, 2008

    That’s “Churlish Bill” trying to hide his dismay that he’s not the party’s nominee. I mean her speech was dissected to the granular level all day today (and last night on this very blog). His will be first translated into Greek, then Sanskrit, then Olberman will tell us what he really meant when he used “the” instead of “a”. Wow. Lemme hit the can before all this starts.

  21. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 8:15 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Starting a pool on why Fox News (which apparently during the convention has given up all pretension of fair and balanced and is only letting conservatives talk) will say that Bill’s speech is a failure. My money is on Bill not promising that Barack will not cure cancer in his first term. Obviously that would mean that Clinton thinks that Barack must want all Americans to die.

  22. smellyal8r says at 8:15 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Lionel Hutz Esq.: No, that’s the plan for Barry at the Denver Parthenon tomorrow night.

  23. SayItWithWookies says at 8:16 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Good lord — on CNN.com, my options are either Harry Reid without audio or Nancy Pelosi in a crowded tent (actually looks like the KOS hut pictured earlier) trying to explain net neutrality. On the bright side, either option is less cringeworthy than Melissa Etheridge’s awful medley.

  24. The Incomparable Tiny Valdez says at 8:16 pm, August 27th, 2008

    I’ll be so embarrassed when Barry drops in at my apartment that my TeeVee isn’t that wide and flat and that all my shelves are covered in nicknacks. If he gives me one day’s notice I will max out my Discover card on a big TeeVee. Then I’ll declare bankruptcy.

  25. nyhfrog says at 8:17 pm, August 27th, 2008

    that’s Bill “Slick Willie” “Frickin’” Clinton…if you don’t mind.

  26. Delicious says at 8:18 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Is it true that McCain will introduce Romney as his running mate on an oil platform in the gulf, and then leave him there?

  27. wallythepug says at 8:18 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Pretty damn funny that anyone thinks Bill can hold his speech to 10 minutes…Poor Joe Biden won’t get to talk until after midnight EST. We need a drinking game…what will be the magic word? “I”, “Me”, “My” or “Hillary?” ‘Cause he’ll prob only mention Obama once or twice.

  28. satyricrash says at 8:19 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Holy crap, has Harry Reid been running against a push broom every six years in Nevada?

  29. grendel says at 8:20 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Reid is a thrilling speake….. zzzzzzzzzzzz

  30. hrhkingfriday says at 8:20 pm, August 27th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: Yeah, the Pelosi feed is impressively depressing. It could have been so much funnier had they just started reading comments from digg. Altho the questions so far are pretty typical of digg- net neutrality, patriot act, telecom immunity, marijuana

  31. S.Luggo says at 8:21 pm, August 27th, 2008

    “Bwaaa. So sad. Somebody massage my man meat, please. Rem’ber that I the country NAFTA.”

  32. genericchallenger says at 8:25 pm, August 27th, 2008

    That woman in the photo could be like AMC’s older sister.

  33. SayItWithWookies says at 8:26 pm, August 27th, 2008

    hrhkingfriday: She got off to a crappy start, but she’s doing better now. So far, this is the wonkiest part of the convention.

  34. S.Luggo says at 8:26 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Fuck.
    that I the GAVE country NAFTA.”

  35. S.Luggo says at 8:28 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Fuck. Timwa two.
    that I GAVE thw country NAFTA.” And the herpes epidemic.

  36. sweetits says at 8:29 pm, August 27th, 2008

    S.Luggo: is that some new std? i should be checked asap

  37. sweetits says at 8:31 pm, August 27th, 2008

    S.Luggo: damn you beat me to it

  38. grendel says at 8:34 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Why do I get the feeling that if we put Madeleine Albright and John McCain in a steel cage that she’d come out holding his skull with the spinal column hanging down…

  39. grendel says at 8:36 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Evan Bayh is making me understand why Biden was the only choice

  40. Oscar Folsom Cleveland says at 8:40 pm, August 27th, 2008

    Is that the face of the gold standard on the big teevee?
    Why no mouth? Uncharacteristic!

    Hopey has landed in Denver. He’s sitting down for a prayer meal with his would-be assassins tonight.
    They’ll watch Bill talk about, um, stuff from the jail.

    http://www.americanrhetoric.com/images/williamjenningsbryancrossofgold.jpg

  41. The 3-Legged Man says at 9:19 pm, August 27th, 2008

    One nice thing about Obama is that he’ll resurrect the career of that one black dude from Sat. Night Live…can’t remember his name…vaguely gayish….had no funny “characters” of his own… but Obama has no vocal or physical mannerisms to caricature, so I guess even a white guy could imitate him. Even a testosterone-less man-girl like Dana Carvey or the other blonde hair guy who wasn’t funny….

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