Wonkette
This is great news: “In an unusual move, Hillary Clinton’s staff is creating a 40-member ‘whip team’ at the Denver Democratic convention to ensure that her supporters don’t engage in embarrassing anti-Obama demonstrations during the floor vote on her nomination.” Whipping unruly Hilltards on the floor of the Democratic convention, well boy howdy. We want in. Imagine: some Bitter starts shouting about Nobama until you walk up, unfurl, then *WHOOSH* *CRACK* and it’s off to the races. Hillary & Barry cackle from afar, approvingly, as one. So where, pray tell, is the sign-up sheet? [Politico/The Crypt]
Good to hear.
Paddyrollers!
A solid two-by-four to the back of the head might be more effective. Or just distract them with cat toys.
wow… Lego Indiana Jones is really hot.
Um, what were we talking about?
Dems: 1-on-1, Toys, S&M, WS
Repubs: Drag, Leather, FF
Hmm… This is starting to look like my manhunt profile.
I would think that pitchforks and torches might be more effective, but what do I know?
I volunteer to beat PUMAs in Denver. For the good of the Party.
Man, Barry sure knows everyone’s sweet bribe spot. Making Hillary an Enforcer? Genius.
i love the way the obamabots are STILL blaming Hillary, now for what they appear to fear is their eventual defeat. they will never accept the fact that they’re guy is NOT “the one” after all. so it’s always blame blame blame.
Hilltards are scary.
Um, can I please take some unpaid vacation time to go whip the PUMAs in Denver?? Do they need interns? I have good references.
That’s in no way turning me on.
First, Obama’s penis, now Hillz.
They’re also going to be giving out Hillary for Prez signs. We’re in for a floor fight folks. Place your bets, is your money on the dog, or the pony?
…McCain is going to win, isn’t he?
*sobs*
Weren’t whips on the list of things banned at the convention? If so, the list didn’t say anything about canes(If you need one to walk, Hint Hint). A caning is just about as good as a whipping, when it comes to the PUMAs.
This act ensures the dominatrix vote.
Hills needs to take that whip to Bill & get him in line. He’s being a huge, crybaby asshat right now & he’s not helping.
where can i get a hot little indy lego please?
It’s true that Hillary will whip them, but only until their morale improves.
I read that somewhere before, so it must be true.
Jerry w
http://www.boskolives.wordpress.com
As usual the Republicans are more disciplined. They have a 40-member Ball-Gag Team.
Why am I having a hard time believing Clinton is going to do anything to attempt to get her followers in line?
— Clinton creates ‘whip team’ to quell anti-Obama protests in South Ossetia —
“Bite me, Pooty”, says Bill. McCain confused. “Umm, me firstest. Can I sleep now?”
…SHIT! If she REALLY want to pay-off her campaign debt she would be selling tickets to whip different members of campaign staff and supporters.
-Harriet Christian = $100 per lash
-Geraldine Ferraro = $200 per lash
-Howard Wolfe = $500 per lash
-Lanny Davis = $1000 per lash
-Bill Clinton = your next mortgage payment
-Mark Penn = the immortal soul of your first born child
When a problem comes along
You must whip it
Before the cream sits out too long
You must whip it
When something’s going wrong
You must whip it
So it is Hillary Vice Prez, Barry as Prezinator, after all. Sly dog/bitch.
And the whipping frenzy explains why I saw so many white SUVs parked outside the Leather Rack on Dupont this afternoon; back from his bodysurfing, Barry’s getting suited up in chaps and boots and nothin’ else (except that thick black….well, this is a family show…”tool”.)
Hmmmm. Must be my persistent bad mood that’s makes me cry “Weak!” And I’m even charitable enough to assume that everyone here understands the function of a ‘whip’ in party politics. Come on, Newell! You can do better than a silly double entendre.
Twinkle Twinkle Lil Star: Yes. They are scary. Even worse, they are conspiracy theorists extraordinaire. With all the Tubbs-Jones drama I figure some new Hiltard meme was bound to emerge.
Sure enough, the first comment on the Chicago Tribune article announcing her hospitalization is from Lu4PUMA:
“What a coincidence, her and Bill Gwatney. Chicago Politics are rough.”
http://www.topix.net/forum/source/chicago-tribune/TK88BR3DIBUCRANUD
Yup. NOOBAMA CAUSED HER BRAIN ANEURYSM.
And that is why I am packing up my cat o’ nine tails and my BIGGEST paddle for Denver.
glamourdammerung: Free Nair samples should do it.
AngryBlakGuy: That’s a wonderful idea, but GWB’s economic policies have left me too broke to pay such hihg prices. How about $20 for a bitch slap?
You know, she’s going to put Lanny Davis out in front. I hear he bites people. Seriously.
Cicada: NOOBAMA could be right. Those Obama Acolytes are serious. They killed Bernie Mac (RIP) too.
http://www.whataboutourdaughters.com/2008/07/bernie-mac-embarrasses-the-hey-ell-out-of-barack-obama-acolytes-shut-it-down/
http://www.zimbio.com/2008+Presidential+Candidates/articles/9388/SCAN+Bidness+There+Push+Push+MAN+Rainbow+PUSH
Jesse better wacth his ass!
AngryBlakGuy: How much for a good ole-fashioned titty-twistin’?
Though I’d probably have to double-bag it with the rubber gloves before handling saggy, wrinkled, bitter titty…
TexasCowGirl: dammmmn… are those crazy bitches implying that Barry gave Bernie Mac the evil eye and caused him to have pneumonia and die? That’s some harsh evil eye…
TexasCowGirl: How had I never heard of SCAN before? It’s beeeyootiful!
I bet SCAN could give Lou Dobbs an aneurysm just by letting him know of their existence.
d4g33z: Oh well you are right, but then again, it was an 11 o’clock post so I get bonus points for doing anything, really. I need a vacation. Oh look I am getting one on Sunday! Oh but shit that “vacation” is a political convention, or two.
If the Obamafia can kill all these people from a distance by causing them diseases and medical situations, why are they powerless over the Republicans? I mean, if you’re actually going to accuse Obama of zombie black Muslim magic, don’t you have to explain why all his political rivals didn’t just die this year?
TexasCowGirl: Acolytes? Châteauneuf-du-Pape vs. Napa Valley Pinot Noir? Or talc vs sand? Sad these bourgeois internecine battles as McCain gains amomg the bitters.
http://songphon.files.wordpress.com/2007/07/movie_xfiles.jpg
EnBuenOra: Because the Republicans are protected from Barry’s black muzzie voodoo by the magical light from their white baby Jeebus.
Duh!
I volunteered during the ‘00 Dem convention in LA, & that was chaos –with non-controversial Al Gore!
Oh boy, Denver’s gonna be MAYHEM FEST.
Whip it?
Whip it good.
2 meters of heavy duty outdoor extension cord with the plug on the business end. Aim for the upper lip.
worstprezever: Yes it will. It’s got me thinking about who the Hilltard MC5 would be.
AngryBlakGuy: Brilliant.
I hear the Repulitards are going to have a “Fist Team”, and they’ll be linin’ up!
EnBuenOra: Cicada: Just wait until the debates start. The first time they share the floor, Barry will let McCain think he’s actually holding his own for half an hour, then open a big can of snark and begin sprinkling it gently all over him. By the closing of the hour, McCain will be beet-red, sweating profusely and clutching the podium with all he’s got. And then Barry will say something that sounds memorably cheesy, like “Is this your final answer, John?” making everyone laugh, until they see McCain’s eyes roll into his head and his body crumple in a dead heap.
EnBuenOra: Don’t question the Antichrist’s methods. It only makes him mad.
Will they be dressed like Catwoman? I think that would boost ratings for the convention tremendously.
First the whipping. Then the oral sex!
Yeah. Awesome.
That skank still has a staff?
loquaciousmusic: If by “staff” you mean…
Oooh, an army of leather clad PUMAs whippin bitters into submission…maybe a goth metal show with suicidegirls in cages. F’it, give the republicans something they can really have a hissy fit over.
How does one sign up? They need to get a good whippin’ BEFORE the convention so it sinks in.
Twinkle Twinkle Lil Star: No not Barry. THEM. The acolytes don’t even listen to Barry. They are totally independent vigilantes. And this was written before Bernie Mac (RIP) passed.
EnBuenOra: Give the Acolytes time, ny friend. Just give them time.
Whipping is OK, I guess, but I’d rather kick them. Is that allowed?
SuperRounder:“It’s got me thinking about who the Hilltard MC5 would be.”
Um… don’t look now, but PUBLIC ENEMY will be rockin’ the house in Denver. Much as I love me some Chuck D. [man's a fuckin' GENIUS imho], I’m not sure beaming “Fight The Power” into the nation’s living rooms will help Hopey’s cause.
Then again, if Chuck says “Here’s a little number about the Kean/Hamilton Commission’s Report” and then launches into a particularly visceral “Nine One One’s A Joke,” it might get the attention of Loose Changers and Truthers everywhere.
And Chuck, no offense man, but PLEASE don’t have the boys showin’ up in NoI regalia, OK? Somehow, I’m thinkin’ that ain’t gonna help elect our boyee.
Tell Obama to keep his shirt on! HRC will have to whip up a really good reason for Millions of us to vote for Obama. The only one I can imagine is: Obama picking Hillary Clinton as VP. I am voting for HRC for President (Write-In) or Vice President. Mr.Uniter will decide? Do you hear us Mr. Obama?
Splash: Groan.
I assume you are joking. Or do you really think “Mr. Obama” reads Wonkette for insights into the minds of bitters?
Whatevs.
Splash: Well, I’m off to the clocktower! Anyone join me?