• May 27, 2012

EXCLUSIVE: BARACK OBAMA PICKS WALTER MONDALE FOR VEEP

by Jim Newell  3:02 pm August 20, 2008

Wonkette’s associate editor — me! — has received his text message from Barack Obama before anyone else and can exclusively report that Minnesota’s Walter Mondale, who may or may not be alive, will become America’s second black vice president. WHERE IZ MY REPORTIN ACCOLADES BABY? Wait… Walter Mondale? Oh. Oh fuck you, Layne.

{ 24 comments }

shortsshortsshorts August 20, 2008 at 3:05 pm

I see you’re sporting the Razr.

Gopherit v2.0 August 20, 2008 at 3:09 pm

Is Newell gonna have to slap a bitch?

SayItWithWookies August 20, 2008 at 3:13 pm

Now you know how McCain felt when someone telegraphed him that McKinley had picked William Jennings Bryan.

jinmoom August 20, 2008 at 3:14 pm

Mondale will guarantee that Obama will win Minnesota!

shortsshortsshorts August 20, 2008 at 3:17 pm

[re=64237]jinmoom[/re]: And lose in many, many other ways.

JadedDIssonance August 20, 2008 at 3:18 pm

Just got a call from one of the friends I pranked. Hilarious. She was away from her computer and wanted me to check the obama site for her…I’d sent in Paris Hilton (realy originalz) as Barry’s vp.

shortsshortsshorts August 20, 2008 at 3:18 pm

[re=64237]jinmoom[/re]: Scratch that. He will still get the elderly bitterz vote.

Monkey August 20, 2008 at 3:19 pm

This is so wicked, evil and demented. I loves it.

CivicHoliday August 20, 2008 at 3:29 pm

Haha, well I know now why we’ll be getting crappy snarks from the Wonkette staff the rest of the day. They’ll be too busy thinking up creative VPs to text to each other and all their friends.

obfuscator August 20, 2008 at 3:35 pm

Aaron Burr for veeples.

tunamelt August 20, 2008 at 3:35 pm

Hey, the unisex girl is wearing an awful lot of clothes for an American Apparel ad.

TGY August 20, 2008 at 3:38 pm

Arugula and Fritz. Makes sense.

[re=64277]tunamelt[/re]: How do you know it’s a girl? Hence ‘unisex’.

BobLoblawLawBlog August 20, 2008 at 3:40 pm

[re=64275]obfuscator[/re]: You just made me want a peanut butter sandwich real bad.

magic titty August 20, 2008 at 3:46 pm

Is Ed Muskie still alive?

Ken Layne August 20, 2008 at 3:50 pm

[re=64277]tunamelt[/re]: Click through, they’re all basically naked and have like one arm half covered by a shirt.

Ken Layne August 20, 2008 at 3:52 pm

… answering the age-old question, “How can you possibly make an oxford shirt look slutty and trashy?”

Quietly August 20, 2008 at 4:01 pm

Obama + Samuel L. Jackson

A match made in heaven.

WagTehGod August 20, 2008 at 4:09 pm

[re=64301]Ken Layne[/re]: I clicked, no n00dz! Damn you Layne and your click-for-profit ways!

pondscum August 20, 2008 at 4:20 pm

According to deadoraliveinfo.com Mondale is alive and 80 years old. Funniest part: when I searched for Mondale two links came up, Walter and Geraldine Ferraro! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

RobPetrified August 20, 2008 at 4:41 pm

Did the same scientists who replaced Dick Cheneys heart
with a mechanical one made of coal also bring Walter Mondale back to life?
If Kryptonite will kill Superman,
and if Peace will kill Darth Cheney,
Then what, pray tell, is Mr. Mondale’s Achilles heel?

Baseproduct August 20, 2008 at 6:15 pm

[re=64355]RobPetrified[/re]: Electoral votes.

rockstarjoe August 20, 2008 at 9:25 pm

I bet Caroline Kennedy picks herself.

freppish August 21, 2008 at 4:39 am

mondale is still alive, he teaches a class at U of M Twin Cities and he looks super old.

jerryw August 21, 2008 at 11:44 am

[re=64283]TGY[/re]: She’s a wonder woman, looks like a woman but you have to wonder?

Jerry w
http://www.boskolives.wordpress.com

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