Wonkette
McCain’s so high all the time, he might even believe that bogus Viet Cong dirt cross story. [American Drug War via CelebStoner]
SLEEPWALKER MCCAIN
Pillhead McCain Will Kill Us All
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Jesus Christ, is it just me or does WALNUTS! entire campaign seem like a year-long full-body seizure? Who the hell votes for this guy?
The audio from poor old addled McCain’s ad is up: http://www.entertonement.com/collections/2208/John-McCain-Faith-Campaign-Ad
I was inspired by the story John McCain told that preacher guy about how, this one time, when he was in POW camp, one of his Vietnamese captors and he were walking on a beach, and there were two sets of footprints, but then for a while there was only one set of footprints, and John McCain asked his captor why he had abandoned him for a while, and his captor replied, “John, my dear future President of America, it was in those times that I carried you!”
LOL! “We’re all gonna die if McCain gets elected.” Best slogan ever! Seriously, Obama should fire his media guys and hire these people.
EnBuenOra: And Jesus said, “Oh, dude, when there was only one set of footprints, that’s when I was fucking you.”
I’m Dennis Hopper, and I approved this message.
John McCain For President!
I’ll have what he’s having.
Ken Layne: The other version I tell of this story has the person ask, “God, why in my times of need did you abandon me?” And God replies, “Oh, yeah. Um, sorry about that.”
NO REFILLS.
That’s my favorite part. No second term for Walnuts at THIS cvs!
Ken Layne:
And Jesus said “Uh… the one set of footprints? Yeah well… there’s a good explanation for that… er… you know how I can walk on water? No, no, no wait… even better, even better: that’s when I was carrying you… yeah, that’s right. I was totally carrying you.” But really Jesus had just slipped away to take in a movie.
It was actually a telephone pole that the guard drew in the dirt, trying to say, “Phone Home! Phone Home!”
So I’m confused, are they saying he should switch from Ambien to MaryJane? That way, he’ll just eat a lot of cheetos and taco bell, and won’t bother us for four years?
…can you smoke Ambien? If so, this may make good middle ground for a compromise!
Next they’ll start saying that Ronald Reagan wasn’t really in Europe at the end of World War II filming the liberation of the concentration camps. And when George Bush says he flew fighters for the Texas Air Guard, it actually means he was snorting coke off the ass of transvestite hookers in Alabama.
But he still supports medicinal use of beer. C’mon, doesn’t he? Strictly for the terminally ill, of course.
Say what you like about commercial television, it does at least force its users to make their point in less than four minutes and forty-one seconds.
I’m surprised to learn that Cynthia McKinney smokes weed. I mean sure, there’s that pattern of paranoia, but what about the sedative effects? Or is she normally even more wound up?
They couldn’t shave off 23 seconds and make the video length 4:20?
That’s very..really..interest..ing..ZzzZZzZZZzzzz..huh, what?
mattbolt: Did you mean ADD a few seconds to make it FIVE AND A HALF MINUTES, MATTBOLT!
…Ambien; the official sleep aid for the nuclear holocaust!
That headline has so many Ls in it. Hypnotic…
user-of-owls: Nevr4get
I’d rather he was asleep at 3am and miss the war than be wide awake at 3am reliving his torture and launching the missiles himself.
Ken Layne: You see, you put McCain’s rear hooves in your Ug boots so he can’t get away and… nevermind
O.k., loved the video, but it could have been more powerful if it weren’t about marijuana. I love my reefer, too, just talking tactically here. The McCain on Ambien stuff was powerful, the newspaper headlines, and especially, especially, the line: We’re all gonna die if McCain gets elected.
PTSD plus Alzheimers gotta be a nasty combination.
McCain hates america with his Paraquat!
Odd Ass City: And his latent “Manchurian Candidate” training becoming active is leaving him a little confused and dizzy
EnBuenOra: Look, is Jesus gonna have to slap a bitch?
Ambien + Viagra = Global Nuclear Holocaust
gurukalehuru:Yeah, but you have to admit that someone who’s been married to Cindy know from experience that there are much stronger pain relievers out there than marijuana.
That film is entirely too long to be the work of potheads.
Why do drugs when you can do REAL drugs.
Juan Jeebus is high on life.
The End
V572625694: It goes by really fast (or MUUUCCCCHHH SLLLLOOOOWWWER) when yr high.
Ken Layne: your are on your way to HELL, you heathen you!
Ken Layne: Then there would’ve been footprints, then kneeprints, then handprints, and maybe a faceprint where Jeebus pushed your face down in the sand.
Yeah. Take it. Take the holy spirit.
Sorry.
RuperttheBear: Thanks for ruining 12 years of catholic education for me. From now on, it’s faceprints in the sand……and I’m not really up to having the Holy Spirit touch my forehead, thanks.
I bet that video is really, really fascinating when you’re high. Hippies are so cute with their marijuana/hemp panaceas. They’re like the people who claim the government is hiding the carburetor that allows cars to run on water.
RuperttheBear: Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, naughty bit to naughty bit, forever and ever. Amen.
Ambien is the only thing that will bring McCain down after freebasing Geritol. It has the minor side effect of sleepwalking. Marijuana on the other hand, even when prescribed by a doctor, has a much more dangerous side effect - fits of uncontrollable laughter. What’s the danger in a hearty giggle-fest? Just ask any septuagenarian with brittle bones and a limited sense of balance.
I was inspired by the story John McCain told that preacher guy about how, this one time, when he was in POW camp, one of his Vietnamese captors and he were walking on a beach, and there were two sets of footprints, but then for a while there was only one set of footprints, and John McCain asked his captor why he had abandoned him for a while, and his captor replied, “John, my dear future President of America, it was in those times that I carried you.
Lincon
Kansas Drug Treatment