THE HORROR  5:08 pm August 15, 2008

Watch The New Conservative ‘Spoof’ Movie Trailer!

by Jim Newell

Here’s the trailer for An American Carol, which was first shown to the world on the O’Reilly Factor last night. Movie trailers rarely debut on Bill O’Reilly’s terrible show, but this is a conservative “spoof” movie starring the few Republican actors in Hollywood. The film’s target is the American Left as personified by Michael Moore, the fat clown no one has ever liked, except maybe 4-5 anonymous Internet commenters for a single week in 2003. The plot: Moore is trying to eliminate the Fourth of July holiday! But Gen. Frasier Crane simply cannot let him get away with this. The film is expected to gross $750 trillion dollars at the domestic box office.[YouTube]

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AnnieGetYourFun August 15, 2008 at 5:12 pm

Wait, I’m sorry. Repubs are trying their hands at ‘humor’? I smell a great big FAIL.

nyhfrog August 15, 2008 at 5:14 pm

Who the fuck greenlighted this?

badco/LoJ August 15, 2008 at 5:15 pm

It’s funny every time somebody gets slapped! HA!

SayItWithWookies August 15, 2008 at 5:16 pm

I thought Niedermeyer got fragged in the ‘Nam. Turns out he’s hiding in a port-a-john with two other Republicans — which is also believable, btw.

Strictly for the Tardcore August 15, 2008 at 5:21 pm

You can tell it’s a latter-day Zucker spoof because it takes the biggest, easiest target, makes all the obvious gags at said target’s expense, adds hits to the face and nutz, ’cause, you know, they’re funny or something, and then pats itself on the back for being so hysterically awesome.

You can actually use the same rubrick to tell if it’s a repub attempt at humor…

BadNewsJack August 15, 2008 at 5:22 pm


sezme August 15, 2008 at 5:27 pm

Michael Moore is still loveable even when fictionally being fucked up the ass by (the real) Bill O’Reilly. Wait, at the beginning did O’Reilly really say “I, your homo correspondent?”

Jobbotch August 15, 2008 at 5:32 pm

Wow, Kelsey Grammer finds another role to play.

grendel August 15, 2008 at 5:33 pm

This is the greatest movie since Down Periscope. Kelsey Grammer should be in every movie.

AngryBlakGuy August 15, 2008 at 5:33 pm

…ironically, I thought this whole administration was a spoof!

Jobbotch August 15, 2008 at 5:36 pm

[re=61040]grendel[/re]: semi-jinx!

graceless August 15, 2008 at 5:36 pm

[re=61039]Jobbotch[/re]: How long has he been Frazer Crane anyway?

The Real JR Revisted August 15, 2008 at 5:37 pm

So ashamed of David Allen Grier.

So ashamed FOR Gary Coleman.

The Real JR Revisted August 15, 2008 at 5:38 pm

[re=61050]graceless[/re]: Jesus Christ… since Cheers. What is that? Like 1987 or so?

Not_So_Much August 15, 2008 at 5:38 pm

I make something similar every a.m. while I read the paper. But I don’t force people to look at it…

american mutt August 15, 2008 at 5:39 pm

Ha ha, silly liberals.

Why can’t we have non-partisan comedies that just make fun of everyone? The South Park creators are republicans right?

Cathangover August 15, 2008 at 5:39 pm

Since the dawn of spoof, my favorite part has always been the old standby of Trace Adkins singing about how fucking great America is.

BadNewsJack August 15, 2008 at 5:40 pm

Did I just see that right? Rosie O’Donnell?? David Alan Grier? WTF?!!! Has the world gone mad?

Jobbotch August 15, 2008 at 5:40 pm

[re=61050]graceless[/re]: Oh God, including Cheers? I feel like the first episodes of that one were in black and white.

Strictly for the Tardcore August 15, 2008 at 5:41 pm

[re=61056]american mutt[/re]: I don’t know that they’re repubs so much as they think everybody’s worthy of mockery.

Jobbotch August 15, 2008 at 5:43 pm

[re=61056]american mutt[/re]: Libertarians, I bet.

anabellum August 15, 2008 at 5:47 pm

“i’m the angel of freaking death, you turdhead”…the new, definitive, American Meme(TM) heard round the world…

pondscum August 15, 2008 at 5:48 pm

[re=61058]BadNewsJack[/re]: No. No. No. Probably. Yes.

brianyc August 15, 2008 at 5:51 pm

anyone notice the part where they flash the praise for “the master of movie satire” actually seems to be a quote by david zucker himself??

Waldo Geraldo Faldo August 15, 2008 at 5:52 pm

Am I an “R word” or did the blurb naming David Zucker the master of satire and spoof come from David Zucker himself?

botlrokit August 15, 2008 at 5:52 pm

[re=61000]nyhfrog[/re]: I’d wager Mel Gibson.

With Kevin Farley in a lead role, is it possible that we could expect other talentless, grabass brothers to appear in this movie? Say, Brian Doyle-Murray? Stephen Baldwin? Jim Belushi? Charlie Murphy? Jeb Bush?

Maus August 15, 2008 at 5:54 pm

[re=61064]Jobbotch[/re]: Yeah, they called themselves Libertarians for a while but considering the Paulvolution’s public face, I’m not so sure they’d identify with the modern movement anymore.

botlrokit August 15, 2008 at 5:54 pm

[re=61074]brianyc[/re]: yeah, saw that. I was thinking Mel Brooks myself, but if David Zucker wants to claim such an honor, fuck it… let’s give it to him. Mel’s already got his props.

irisheyes August 15, 2008 at 5:57 pm

I’m starting to think that Wonkette editors own shares in Absolut. For the past three Fridays they have managed to drive me into the loving arms of my martini well before appropriate cocktail hours.

ManchuCandidate August 15, 2008 at 5:57 pm

Where’s Yakov Smirnoff?

Christastic August 15, 2008 at 6:01 pm

[re=61083]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Branson!

momentum57 August 15, 2008 at 6:14 pm

I can’t believe what negative nancies you all are nor that i just wrote negative nancies. I am sure that it will have its moments and if you cant laugh at your self who can you laugh at. The man has done some great work and made fun of republicans and liberal along his life time. I am sure that you remember the main plot in the naked gun and not the one where reggie jackson was going to kill the queen and not the third one. Anyhow it will be brilliant just laugh at the fat man mikey moore cant say it was a bad movie because as much as I liked Canadian Bacon (you have to live around the border to get the jokes) it was a massive failure.

economywine August 15, 2008 at 6:16 pm

So three republicans and a fat guy in a porta-potty… and they’re slapping each other? Whoa… maybe Zucker really is the master?

bago August 15, 2008 at 6:24 pm

In Soviet Russia, Vodka drinks your Georgia. It drinks it up! (Or something)

Cathangover August 15, 2008 at 6:26 pm


Uh, I believe that was Rosie O’Connell. Seriously.

ejcsanfran August 15, 2008 at 6:30 pm

I thought the funniest part of the whole clip was Bill’s intro – I thought he said “And I, your homo correspondent, am in it”.

Wee Mousie August 15, 2008 at 6:44 pm

Rated R,for naked stupidity.

Only the line where the Falafel Kid admits he has no reason, but he just likes slapping Michael Moore, and where Farley, as Moore, tries to touch a woman’s breast once he believes she can’t see or hear him, is funny.

Why? Because somewhere there is a grain of truth in it.

Reich Wing humor usually fails, because most often, they substitute meanness for this essential ingredient.

Maus August 15, 2008 at 6:46 pm

[re=61101]momentum57[/re]: I liked Michael Moore in Team America because it wasn’t one of those THIS IS WHAT CONSERVATIVES ACTUALLY BELIEVE “jokes” like what you’d expect from passive-aggressive dry-drunk Glenn Beck.

BadNewsJack August 15, 2008 at 7:00 pm

[re=61119]Cathangover[/re]: Dude that looked like Rosie O’Donnell and since my comp doesnt have sound, well watever.

cal August 15, 2008 at 7:05 pm

America, F#ck Yeah!

Shmucky DeFukhed August 15, 2008 at 7:28 pm


The Repubs can’t try their hand at humor? The Dems get to have all the fun by running the Messiah?

columnv August 15, 2008 at 7:29 pm

[re=61020]BadNewsJack[/re]: yea, his brother is turning circles in his super-sized coffin

Lascauxcaveman August 15, 2008 at 7:30 pm

Hard to believe Dennis Hopper and James Woods are that hard up for a paycheck.

melving August 15, 2008 at 7:38 pm

Why didn’t they get Jimmie “JJ” Walker for this one? He is a RWer, right? It seems that if you are looking for washed up, D-list, “stars”, he’d be a good choice. BTW, Who the fuck is Rosie O’Connell?

greensprout August 15, 2008 at 7:56 pm

Oh hey, super-cheap old hat pot shots at women and black people! Are we sure this isn’t just a commercial for the RNC?

lolbyist August 15, 2008 at 8:01 pm

I guess only liberals can make fun of liberals.

Or anything.

This could have been funny, for realzies

Jim Newell August 15, 2008 at 8:49 pm

[re=61174]lolbyist[/re]: conservatives can try humor. but parody isn’t very sharp when it’s against michael moore? also, i don’t think that awful country singer is in there as a joke.

Jim Newell August 15, 2008 at 8:53 pm

actually, conservatives *don’t* get to make spoofs of liberals, because conservatives have ruined the country and world for the last eight years.

Darehead August 15, 2008 at 8:57 pm

“spoof on the ‘far left’”

‘Murica has no “far left”! ‘Murica barely has a left left, but it does have right, further right, still further right, far right, very far right, off-the-map right….

mookworthjwilson August 15, 2008 at 8:57 pm

[re=61076]botlrokit[/re]: Charlie Murphy is a national treasure.

mookworthjwilson August 15, 2008 at 9:01 pm

[re=61052]The Real JR Revisted[/re]: So ashamed for the “snozzberries taste like snozzberries” guy from Super Troopers…

mookworthjwilson August 15, 2008 at 9:05 pm

[re=61101]momentum57[/re]: Dude…I’ll have what he’s having…that has to be some good shit…

Franklin Pierce & Pierce August 15, 2008 at 9:23 pm

If we’re lucky, Zucker will next direct an adaptation of “Storm Saxon”; the fascist/racist, pro-government action movie in “V for Vendetta” .

KittyKatMan August 15, 2008 at 9:27 pm

Ok, it’s time to spork my eyes out.

…James Woods is a conservatard??

Serolf Divad August 15, 2008 at 9:27 pm

My question is this: how do Conservatives decide which absurd conspiracy theory merits serious treatment and which to treat as a spoof? ’cause in this movie Michael Moore is trying to eliminate the 4th of July and we’re supposed to see that for the ridiculous, ha, ha, premise that the filmmakers wish it were. But in about three months Fox News is going to start rolling out their old “War on Christmas” bullshit and we’re supposed to take that as being as serious as a heart attack. Or maybe the line between satire and reality is not really relevant to conservative propagandists.

Prediction: On or around June 1st, 2009 Bill O’Reilly will make the follwing statement on his show:

“You may recall that last October the film “An American Carol” spoofed the idea of far-left filmmaker Michael Moore trying to eliminate the 4th of July Holiday. Well believe it or not, recently our film crew ran accross a far-left group that’s trying to do just that.”

And the segment that follows will focus on a borderline schizophrenic guy who blieves himself to be the reincarnation of Geronimo and who lives in his mom’s basement and once put up a free geocities website protesting the injustices that our government has visited on the Native American population and suggesting that the 4th of July should be viewed as a day of mourning rather than celebration. And O’Reilly will conclude by noting that said website has gotten over 300 hits*

*Since 1997.

natoslug August 15, 2008 at 9:30 pm

So good it’s going straight to video!!!

Larry McAwful August 15, 2008 at 9:55 pm

[re=61101]momentum57[/re]: Laugh at myself? Not where that movie’s concerned. What’s this about liberals wanting to ban the Fourth of July? That’s more like a parody of the way conservatives think about liberals, pretending that their anti-liberal smears from 1974 still hold water today. I don’t mind being lampooned, but considering that the whole movie is based on a premise that works out to be a jab at conservatives more than liberals, I feel guilty, because I know this is the best attempt that conservatives can make at satire. It makes me sad, sad for the conservatives.

Bathroom Goblin August 15, 2008 at 10:05 pm

Shouldnt Kelsy Grammer turn himself in under some Three Stikes law? It’s the honorable thing to do and the GOP is all about honor… and child penis.

DP August 15, 2008 at 10:41 pm

Who the fuck is Rosie O’Connell?

ch36u3v4r4 August 15, 2008 at 11:44 pm


The imdb entry also has such interesting entries as: Hitler, John F. Kennedy (will they retroactively claim him as a pachyderm?), Tojo, Mary Hart and WW2 Navy Seal Ghost. Should be a heck of a cinematic abortion.

slowhansolo August 16, 2008 at 12:23 am

Okay, I’ll start the betting at $200 million domestic…

Jingo August 16, 2008 at 12:23 am

My God! After watching that, I now envy Chris Farley’s rotting, overweight corpse. The funniest part was that guy at the beginning with the turkey neck and one wandering eye. He reminds me of a modern day Marty Feldman… sans the good looks.

ManchuCandidate August 16, 2008 at 1:18 am

You mean like the Faux Newz version of the Daily Show that bombed horribly? I saw part of a couple of eps. Wow. It sucked large.

shortsshortsshorts August 16, 2008 at 2:54 am

Fuck this computer,
and Fuck your couch.

bitchincamaro August 16, 2008 at 10:14 am

If Ted Nugent’s in this bitch, I’m so there.

Pop Socket August 16, 2008 at 10:31 am

[re=61119]Cathangover[/re]: I had now idea Jerry had a fat dumpy lesbian sister.

gurukalehuru August 16, 2008 at 10:45 am

Rosie O’Conell sounds like a porn name. I’m sorry I said that.

snig August 16, 2008 at 11:07 am

I think of the difference between the two veins of humour as Doonesbury vs. Mallard Fillmore. That’s probably too cruel to the conservatives, maybe I should say that Prickly City. It sucks slightly less.

From the wiki on Blog Criticism of Mallard Fillmore:
Blog criticism
The strip has been continuously criticized by a variety of blogs due to its alleged lack of humor. According to Chris Kelly, the strip is an “actual disgrace” and noted that “Reading it is like watching the loneliest creep at the gun show try to pick up a waitress by quoting George Will, throw up on himself, and cry.”[8] Comic Curmudgeon states he doesn’t comment about Mallard Fillmore, because to do so would be “as foaming, angry, and unfunny as Mallard Fillmore itself” and goes on to say “the strip itself is a sham of a comic strip” [9] An entire blog, What’s Wrong With Mallard Fillmore, is devoted to provide “A daily analysis of the comic strip which manages to be less funny than Mary Worth”. A search for “mallard fillmore not funny” on Google returns more than 10,000 results. [10]

Advocatus_Diaboli August 16, 2008 at 11:22 am

So besides JJ Walker, is there any D-list republican retard celebrity NOT in this crapfest?

SayItWithWookies August 16, 2008 at 12:29 pm

What’s Republican comedy about? Um…maybe murdering Americans who believe in the separation of church and state. Are you laughing yet?

In a scene that Sokoloff described, but didn’t bring, Patton and his soldiers storm a courthouse that’s about to remove the Ten Commandments and start opening fire on the people trying to stop them. “You can’t shoot these people!” Malone says. “They’re not people!” says Patton. “They’re the ACLU!” At this point we see that the ACLU members are unkillable George Romero zombies.

Gee, don’t I remember Bill O’Reilly getting incensed because Kos and HuffPo commenters said mean things about conservatives? Oh wait — more hilarity ensues:

‘…Jon Voight is playing George Washington. In a clip we saw, Washington takes Malone to St. Paul’s Cathedral to lecture him on freedom of religion and “freedom of speech, which you abuse.” Malone is grossed out by dust in the priest’s box, so the doors open onto the smoldering ruins of the World Trade Center. “This is the dust of 3000 innocent human beings!” bellows Washington. Malone whimpers that he’s just making movies. Washington won’t have it. “Is that what you plan to say on Judgment Day?”’

Oh my — just wiping away tears from imagining the laughs that are gonna come out of that scene! Okay, this is an unattributed review, so it could be complete bullshit — on the other hand, that is pretty consistent with the craptasticness of the trailer.

lolbyist August 16, 2008 at 12:34 pm

Want to see a move that makes fun of Michael Moore FTW?


They even stuffed his puppet with giblets so that when it aspoloded they would splatter all over the scene.

lumpenprole August 16, 2008 at 3:43 pm

Maybe some “left fringe” groups should organize a pointless boycott, make a big deal out of not watching his show or something something.

momentum57 August 16, 2008 at 7:59 pm

You don’t think that O’Rely who is a fatuous oaf was making fun of his persona by say “no I just like slapping you”

The only thing that I want out of this movie is turbulence shaking boobies

Sabre_Justice August 16, 2008 at 10:17 pm

Somebody should sue over this one.

This looks much more like a parody of conservatives than liberals. And please tell me that’s the original Robert Downey, not the Iron Man we all know and love. Civil War was bad enough.

Nice_Pete August 16, 2008 at 10:50 pm

[re=61349]momentum57[/re]: Slapping is merely one instrument in Bill’s expansive sexual harassment tool-box

james_cambridge August 16, 2008 at 11:31 pm

[re=61216]slowhansolo[/re]: Okay, I’ll start the betting at $200 million domestic…”

It’ll be lucky to gross $200,000. But if the reich-wing noise machine really, really gets behind it, it might gross as much as Howard The Duck.

Meanwhile, the anti-Patriot Act screed disguised as a movie about an insane man who dresses as a Bat to fight crime just became the second biggest movie of all time behind Titanic today. Take that Zucker and Farley!!

regisgoat August 17, 2008 at 9:41 am

[re=61211]ch36u3v4r4[/re]: Did they have Navy SEALs in the big war? I’m thinking no, but these erstwhile patriots couldn’t even bother to check. It’s not the last refuge of a scoundrel, it’s the first.

regisgoat August 17, 2008 at 9:44 am

[re=61229]ManchuCandidate[/re]: It was a dog egg, and yet Stephanopolous felt honor bound to excerpt it on his show–to put its lousy sub-to-the-millionth power ripoff of SNL’s news right next to Jon Stewart.

snig August 17, 2008 at 11:03 am

Though his MO is usually to be on the phone with a coworker while slapping something.

freppish August 17, 2008 at 4:37 pm

wow this looks like hours of fail

dcjdjay August 17, 2008 at 11:26 pm

The left offers plenty of material to spoof.
The problem is that this idiot, Zucker, while taking on the left, has also fully embraced GWB and his rubbish politics. That negates any attempts at spoofing. Margaret Cho spoofs lesbians all the time, but I dont see her worshipping at the altar of Fred Phelps.

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