Wonkette
Oh look, it’s past one o’clock on any day, which means John Kerry has just e-mailed all of Washington his 64th press release of the early afternoon. And what is it about? Murder. MURRRRRDER.
PSYCHO
Well, I picked the wrong day to leave my pitchfork at home.
Well its good to see some conviction from the little cockhead, for once.
And that’s only marginally better than the “Squiggyfm, you are a moron” spams I get.
Out in the streets, they call it murder.
Oh noes! Kerry is finally going to finish Edwards off!
Ever since being cut off at the knees in 2004, all of this unfair Obama bashing has riled up some sort of PTSD in Kerry in which he’s regressing back to a feral state aka 1960’s Vietnam in which he’s back in the bush, dark face paint, fatigues and a bandanna around his head, he’s launching himself out of the water into a flying pounce with a wild look in his eye and a hunting knife held between his teeth…
Okay Rambo!Kerry is kinda hot.
ZOMG KERRY WANTS TO NUKE DC
…damn it! Was that today?!?!
4tehlulz: Win.
Jessica Fletcher for VP
SayItWithWookies: What about your torch? Nobody should leave their house without their good old mob torch.
The liars are back? When did they leave?
freakishlystrong: Weren’t they on vacation in Hawaii?
Wait…I thought the democrats left Washington this month while the Republicans stayed behind…so that must mean…?
freakishlystrong: i believe it was a thursday
He’s still better than Bush.
…when we “finish them off” can we use Mortal Kombat style fatalities?! Dibs on Kano’s heart grab!!!
I just got an e-mail from the Obama campaign that Kerry is going to be the keynote speaker on Friday, the 26th.
Saigon. Shit. I’m still only in Saigon.
No. If John Kerry wanted to commit ‘genocide’, he would do so by boring people to death. It certainly sucks your will to live.
Mr. Herpes: That will be a good time to go to the restroom, get another beer or whatever. More like the ‘Bathroom keynote’.
AngryBlakGuy: You’ve got the fist in the right spot.
Man, I thought this was another hopeless quest, but check the numbers:
http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=John+Kerry&word2=The+liars
redrum…redddrum….RED RUM! no wonder I kept saying that all morning.
Well, at 6′4″ and with the ketchup money of known terrorist Teresa Simões-Ferreira Heinz, whose gonna stop him?
First, Ruskie tanks roll into Georgia and the neocon patriots ramp it up to WW IV.
Now, Pennsylvania private jets marked only with the image of St. Christopher will begin bombing Arizona.
Barry, come back! We need you!
When this popped up in my inbox (should I admit that?), I did think it odd that John Kerry was urging me to go out and murder. But hey, the man knows what’s right, so I did my part and murdered a few of my neighbors who I guessed were probably lying about something or other.