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FINISH HIM OFF

When Barack Obama Punched Out McCain

He's punching Grandpa Simpson!
Here’s a fun picture from February 8, 2006, probably at the Capitol. It’s Barack Obama, doing the old “I’ll distract this old man with a friendly handshake, and then I’ll smash his fucking skull.” And when McCain finally regained consciousness and tried to speak, Dr. Bill Frist leaned over to hear McCain sigh contentedly …. [Digg?]


5:07 PM on Mon August 11 2008
By Ken Layne
3939 Views

  1. Hopey can sting like a butterfly. Uh. Something like that.

  2. SayItWithWookies says at 5:09 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “I’m gonna knock your ass into Czechoslovakia, muthafucka!”

  3. shortsshortsshorts says at 5:11 pm, August 11th, 2008

    I HAVE NEVER SEEN OUR NATION’S TWO BIGGEST CELEBRITIES SHAKING HANDS BEFORE.
    Can they end that stupid political attack now? Pwease?

  4. Delicious says at 5:13 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “You’re luck I don’t have my pimp ring on.”

  5. StripesAndPlaids says at 5:13 pm, August 11th, 2008

    I pity the fool who compares me to Paris Hilton!

  6. AnnieGetYourFun says at 5:13 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Wow, Ken, your closing sentence? Fucking. Awesome.

  7. PeteJayhawk v2.0 says at 5:14 pm, August 11th, 2008

    LOOK AT THE BLACK PANTHER FIST. THIS PROVES THAT BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS MOSLIM AND BLACK SEPRATIST. NOOBAMA 2008!

  8. columnv says at 5:15 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Black people are terrifying.

  9. BadNewsJack says at 5:16 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “Thats two for flinching”

  10. Canmon (the Inadequate) says at 5:16 pm, August 11th, 2008

    McCain’s taken worse punishment than what Obama could dish out.

  11. itgetter says at 5:16 pm, August 11th, 2008
  12. WadISay says at 5:16 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Break a jaw like McCain’s and it’s a felony, not a misdemeanor.

  13. BobLoblawLawBlog says at 5:18 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “To prepare for this campaign, I done rassled me a alligator (Hillary). I tousled wit a whale (Mark Penn). I done handcuffed lightning (I like to think Michelle) and threw thunder (hopefully Dubya and Dick both) in jail.”

  14. trophy(forparticipation)wife says at 5:18 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Walnuts is laughing so hard. He looks like he’s going to pee.

  15. SayItWithWookies says at 5:21 pm, August 11th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: I completely missed that the first time — that’s hilarious.

  16. pondscum says at 5:22 pm, August 11th, 2008

    trophy(forparticipation)wife: Thank God for the Depends.

  17. WhatTheHeck says at 5:29 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Perfect scroll-over, Ken.

    Even back then, Obama was trying his best to show how the democrats were a blood-thirsty,
    war-like, militant bunch.

    The old man just laughed.

  18. tunamelt says at 5:30 pm, August 11th, 2008

    McCain looks older in that picture than he does now. Which is goddamn weird.

  19. AngryBlakGuy says at 5:33 pm, August 11th, 2008

    …what did the five fingers say to the face?!

  20. satyricrash says at 5:34 pm, August 11th, 2008

    MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT!

  21. mr.november says at 5:35 pm, August 11th, 2008

    McCain: Uncle! I said Uncle…Tom’s Cabin.

  22. trophy(forparticipation)wife says at 5:37 pm, August 11th, 2008

    How about a Hawaiin punch?

  23. BadNewsJack says at 5:38 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “You know, if my fist is bigger than your face, it means you have cancer. Allow me to demonstrate.”

  24. trophy(forparticipation)wife says at 5:38 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Or Hawaiian.

  25. magic titty says at 5:38 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Barry is totally crushing McCain’s right hand. He’s not laughing, he’s wincing. And farting.

    btw, if this isn’t Hopey’s campaign poster in negative two days ago, I will be furious.

  26. BadNewsJack says at 5:40 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “Care for a Hertz Donut?”

  27. Whiskeybaby says at 5:41 pm, August 11th, 2008

    This is the best open caption contest ever. Except I can’t think of a caption.
    [furrows brow]

  28. Canuckledragger says at 5:41 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Nah.

    Hopey: “How’d you like a Hawaiian punch?”

    McCain: “I’ll stick with the Hawaiian pizza. I get more pussy that way. You cunt!”

  29. StupidGeek says at 5:42 pm, August 11th, 2008

    He’s just attempting a friendly terrorist fist bump.

  30. BadNewsJack says at 5:42 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “Is Barack Obama gonna have to choke a bitch?

  31. populucious says at 5:43 pm, August 11th, 2008

    This is in fact an early prototype version of the terrorist fist jab. When McCain did not respond appropriately, Hopey realized that the Manchurian programing implanted in McCain by the Viet Cong had not switched on yet.

    But it will, America….it WILL.

  32. pdiddycornchips says at 5:45 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Walnuts: “What do you call 1000 black Senators buried in sand to their shoulders?”

    Barry: “I dare you to say old man, please, just whisper it and I’ll kick the snot out your ass”

  33. pdiddycornchips says at 5:46 pm, August 11th, 2008

    BadNewsJack:

    Well played…

  34. Notice how NEITHER OF THEM are sporting FLAG PINS.

    Why do the McObamas hate America so much?

  35. AngryBlakGuy says at 5:51 pm, August 11th, 2008

    …don’t move, you have something on your face!

  36. lilblackcorvette says at 5:55 pm, August 11th, 2008

    My new wallpaper!

  37. CivicHoliday says at 5:55 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Right on, he’s channeling Jules from Pulp Fiction! “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you.”

  38. BadNewsJack says at 5:59 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “What’d you say about my mama?”

  39. Whiskeybaby says at 6:02 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Maybe it’s just my hormones talking, but every single picture I’ve ever seen of Barry leads me to believe that he would smell delicious.
    McCain, on the other hand, looks like he smells like wee.

  40. BadNewsJack says at 6:07 pm, August 11th, 2008

    “I swear to god, I meant to say Damn Naggers”

  41. LittlePig says at 6:14 pm, August 11th, 2008
  42. Monsieur Grumpe says at 6:14 pm, August 11th, 2008

    McCain is just about to get a Hertz Donut.

  43. trophy(forparticipation)wife says at 6:22 pm, August 11th, 2008

    LittlePig: You are too kind. I was feeling so lame because of the spelling error and then the omission of ‘nice’.

    “How about a nice Hawaiian punch?”

    That was a long time ago.

  44. loudmouthredhead says at 6:31 pm, August 11th, 2008

    BadNewsJack: awesome.
    “See my hand here? See that wedding ring?”
    “Kheh heh heh! Your life force flows into me now..I hope you’re ready for a long campaign, sonny.”

  45. Mr. Herpes says at 6:34 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Sen. Obama is saying: “You gamey old motherfucker. If you or anyone in your campaign ever dis my wife again, I will pound that ugly black mole to the other side of your face.”
    Sen. McCain: “Not the face, not the face. And go easy on my hand. I’m a goddam war hero you know.”

  46. wheelie says at 6:38 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Obama is cracking McCain’s knuckles with his handshake, while distracting him with a raised fist. This is an old trick.

    I got it played on me many times as a kid. My, how we laughed!

  47. Landstander says at 6:42 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Let me just say…
    “And when McCain finally regained consciousness and tried to speak, Dr. Bill Frist leaned over to hear McCain sigh contently …. ”

    Lines like that are what makes this site so fantastic!

  48. BadNewsJack says at 6:43 pm, August 11th, 2008

    McCain :”If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.”
    *POW*
    “OK, I was wrong.”

  49. Street Organizer says at 6:47 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Wait! I suddenly like McCain. He was trying to touch Hopey’s pipe. He couldn’t restrain himself. He was so close, he just had to reach out…and…try to…..(brb)

  50. Street Organizer says at 6:50 pm, August 11th, 2008

    OK. Back now. Phew!!!! That was AWEsome. You guys need to get you some touching Barry and fist imagery going! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

  51. pdiddycornchips says at 7:00 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Whiskeybaby:

    I hadn’t thought about that but now that you mention it, I bet he does smell good. But then I got to thinking about how Bush and Cheney might smell. Then Condi. Then my mind considered Hillary and of course Bill. Here’s my fragrance chart for the aforementioned:

    Bush—Baby powder and bubble gum

    Cheney–Old cigarettes, sweat and shoe polish

    Condi—Chanel No. 5, vodka and orange peel

    Hillary–My grandmothers couch

    Bill— BBQ sauce, Old Spice and saw dust

  52. trophy(forparticipation)wife says at 7:23 pm, August 11th, 2008

    Unrelated - but the evidence is in. McCain has been on his knees.

    http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/c3508ce2-67d1-11dd-8d3b-0000779fd18c.html

  53. PoliTacky says at 7:48 pm, August 11th, 2008

    It’s hard to tell what’s going on because the table is just cut out of the picture, but this was shot at the nightly “Senators Only” craps game, and Obama’s gettin’ ready to throw down a Hard 8.. McCain’s just wishing him luck before he goes back to filling out Keno cards in the buffet area.

  54. sarcasticusername says at 7:53 pm, August 11th, 2008

    even walnuts can’t resist the charms of barry’s fist jabbing ways. he totally has a crush on him but barry doesn’t do old white dudes, hence the recent fatal attraction turn his campaign’s advertising has taken. He won’t be ignored Barry!! He won’t!!

  55. nosnikreplliw says at 8:03 pm, August 11th, 2008

    he kicked walnuts ass with one hand cuz walnuts grabbed for the secret saddam hussein plans tucked up under his other arm

  56. WikipediaBrown says at 8:30 pm, August 11th, 2008

    POW! Right in the kisser!

    This is now my new desktop wallpaper :)

  57. Cantonresque says at 8:47 pm, August 11th, 2008

    later, in the hospital…

    “Where is that wonderful gorilla?”

  58. S.Luggo says at 1:43 am, August 12th, 2008

    President von Hindenburg, get the fuck out of my way. From now on, “Party All the Time”.

  59. Neilist says at 4:50 am, August 12th, 2008

    To (mis)quote the Greatest American Hero - Chuck Norris:

    “You come back into the Senate, Honky, and I’m going to hit you with so many lefts you’ll pray for a right.”

    (From “Invasion U.S.A.,” I think. Wonderful “cinema.”)

  60. McCain must have been standing on a table during that photo.

  61. ReelectTilden says at 9:10 am, August 12th, 2008

    If this involves birthday punches, McCain’s going to end up dead.

  62. nbawriter says at 2:42 pm, August 12th, 2008

    How can McCain even point and shoot in the urinal with that limp grip?

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